A young European boy living in San Francisco is reluctant to marry his long-term girlfriend because he wants to travel around the world first. His wealthy uncle agrees to send him on a ...
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An aging magician harboring a terrible occult secret and his daughter are taken hostage in their isolated mansion by teenage scumbags need- ing a place to hide out. When the captors refuse ... See full summary »
Juan Piquer Simón
Luis Fernando Alvés
Paul, a mercenary in Africa, decides that he can no longer work for the Organization because of their brutal tactics. But the evil Organization refused to release him, and Paul finds that he must fight his way out.
An experimental submarine, the "Siren II", is sent to find out what happened to the "Siren I", which has mysteriously disappeared in a submarine rift. Things go awry when they begin to find... See full summary »
When Captain Murphy is attacked by two thieves, the unemployed sailor Bob recovers his money, and in return, the captain hires Bob to work in his ship. In a storm, they leave the vessel and... See full summary »
A young European boy living in San Francisco is reluctant to marry his long-term girlfriend because he wants to travel around the world first. His wealthy uncle agrees to send him on a global expedition aboard his ship, but en route the boy and his travelling companion are shipwrecked on a remote island, populated by countless prehistoric creatures as well as gold-hunting bandits. Written by
Jonathon Dabell <J.D.@pixie.ntu.ac.uk>
It's been over for 5 hours and I'm still aghast...
"It's the worst movie ever" is an oft-used phrase. "It's a real turkey" has just about lost its punch. How about this for a plug line: "MONSTER ISLAND isn't a movie; it's punishment for a lifetime of horrible deeds."
I taped it for my 6-year-old son and we just got through watching the thing; I had to have a bath afterwards in case any stray remnants of this cheesy, inept, incompetently-directed, over-the-top spectacularly bad acting, ill-conceived design, Jules-Verne-insulting, direct-attack-on-filmmaking pile managed to shoot through the pixels and land on me. The looping was apparently done by performers for whom 'human' is a second language. Truly excellent actors Peter Cushing and Terence Stamp were fortunate because while top-billed, they barely had any screen time at all. I'm still floored by having to witness one of the most baroquely florid and horrendously just plain bad performances in the history of cinema: that of the estimable David Hatton as Professor Artelect. It all makes sense in a way: he must have been the title Monster; his victim the acting profession.
In summation, this is a reprehensibly dreadful z-budget debacle. Suffice it to say my young son found it unbelievably bad and he's about as easy an audience as they come. Don't just avoid this one: work hard to help find a cure for it.
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