800 Fantasy Lane (1979)

User Rating:

6.1/10   

Director:

Svetlana

Writer:

Svetlana (script)

Release Date:

26 January 1980 (Japan)

Genre:

Adult

Tagline:

Hotter Than Hell!

Plot:

Two lowly gas pump attendants pose as oil magnates in order to gain entry into the exclusive Hollywood Star Realty ...

Plot Keywords:

Sex | Hardcore | Address As Title

Cast

Jamie Gillis	...	Vic Derges
Sam Grady	...	John Poster (as Bud Wise)
Chris Anderson	...	Karen/hot tub girl #1
Aubrey Nichols	...	Samantha/hot tub girl #4 (as Nicki Phillips)
Serena	...	Hot tub girl #3/The Pony
Nancy Suiter	...	Olivia/hot tub girl #2 (as Candy Summer)
Desiree Cousteau	...	Girl in wheelbarrow (as Desiree)
Hillary Summers	...	Girl in sling/hot tub girl #5 (as Amy Leigh)
Lisa De Leeuw	...	Victoria/The Leopard (as Lisa Deleeuw)
Alan Colberg	...	Hubert Fielder (as Allen Colberg)
Don Moonshine	...	Cab driver

Runtime:

82 min | USA:76 min (1980 video release)

Country:

USA

Language:

English

Color:

Color

Sound Mix:

Mono

Certification:

USA:X (self applied) | Argentina:X

Filming Locations:

San Francisco, California, USA

Company:

Cal-Vista International Pictures

All That Money Can Buy

One of the relatively rare "real" female directors (as opposed to male filmmakers employing female pseudonyms) in pornography, Svetlana's main claim to fame was her ability to discover hot new girls, many of whom went on to industry stardom. Indeed, quite a few carnal critics seem to think that was her only talent. A closer look at the evidence would suffice to prove them wrong. Sure, some of her latter-day efforts - like the dreary ANOTHER ROLL IN THE HAY - will only appeal to the most indiscriminate of girlie watchers, but in her heyday the great lady cranked out one fabulous fornication fest after another as "F", SEX BOAT, the original BAD GIRLS and SURRENDER IN PARADISE (the highlight of her Ginger Lynn "Hawaiian foursome") clearly attest. Her very first directorial endeavor, 800 FANTASY LANE, already showed great promise yet it's also interesting to note how different it feels from subsequent work, an indication she might still have been feeling her way, exploring what worked best. The sex, for instance, proves a lot rougher than that in her considerably fluffier follow-ups, pretty much bordering on full-on raunch, a factor which made me somewhat uncomfortable back when I saw the movie for the first time (over two decades ago) but really makes me love it now that I'm - to quote the Three Degrees - a "dirty old man" !

A pair of horny pump jockeys, Vic and John (played by a shamelessly mugging Jamie Gillis and fly by night stud Bud Wise, who delivered a decent comic turn in Tony Kendrick's hit 'n' miss HOT DALLAS NIGHTS), hit on a way to live in the lap of luxury accompanied by all the hot and cold running wenches they can handle whilst perusing the ads in the paper. Seems that there's an upmarket real estate company willing to go that extra mile (i.e. wine, dine, 69) in order to secure their wealthy clientèle, so the buddies pose as filthy rich oil barons to get their hands and assorted other body parts on all the fine fillies dying to make a deal. Once the premise has been set up, the plot pretty much falls apart but with the tantalizing talent on display few will care. Superstars Serena and Desirée Cousteau get things off to a roaring start with their "fist insertion" number - the former being the recipient - now cut on NuTech's DVD but gloriously present as I caught the flick last week at Brussels' still operational ABC theater ! Maybe it's me, but something always strikes me as a bit clinical about scenes of this particular nature. So, as far as I'm concerned, things definitely get better after this...

Where this movie truly excels is in its group gropes, surely something of a surprise for a novice pornographer as Svetlana at the time. Carnal cult favorite Nancy Suiter (unforgettable in the legendary opening sequence to Gary Graver's milestone ECSTASY GIRLS) and rarely seen Aubrey Nichols (from Jourdan Alexander's TAXI GIRLS and HEAVENLY DESIRE) make an awesome twosome, ganging up on Gillis who's supplanted at the last minute by Wise for a stunningly shot threesome. Aforementioned veteran DoP and ace erotic auteur Graver provided the glowing cinematography, cementing his well-deserved reputation as one of the finest in the field. A delightfully depraved dungeon sequence finds Serena and Hillary Summers (who had yet to hit the big time with Ron Sullivan's BUDDING OF BRIE) suspended in slings, tormented by Nordic blonde Chris Anderson - who would disappear right after Svetlana's "F" - with Desirée masturbating on the sidelines. The nastiness quotient increases dramatically once Gillis gets in on the act. Remember that Serena and Jamie were an item at the time, notorious for their kinky antics both on and off screen. The bouncy bathtub five on one - with Gillis being pleasured by Nancy, Aubrey, Serena, Chris and Hillary - provides the perfect breezy counterpart to this intense number.

While "fellow" oil baron Hubert Fielder, played by dirty movie director Alan B. Colberg who made the unsung Abigail Clayton vehicle NAKED AFTERNOON, does his darnedest to gather info exposing our "heroes" as impostors, the two of them get high on reefer, inspiring the movie's most inspired sex section. Wise imagines carrying his humongous (papier maché !) genitals around in a wheelbarrow, squirting milky substance all over his adoring acolytes. In the scene everyone remembers from this film, Gillis turns into a wild animal tamer in a cage holding pony Serena, tiger Aubrey and leopard Lisa DeLeeuw. For the record, this movie also marked the debut for then 21-year old Lisa who sadly passed away due to an AIDS-related illness in 1993. Allow me to end with a side dish of trivia. The version I most recently came across was the German dub, "prepared" by Czech mate Alan Vydra for Beate Uhse. In a surefire example of rampant copyright infringement, its soundtrack was littered with brainless if irresistible Euro pop ditties from the period like Dutch girl group Luv's Yes, I Do and French husband and wife double act Ottawan's annoyingly catchy D.I.S.C.O.