Eeyore: It's not much of a tail, but I'm sort of attached to it.
Narrator: Wherever they go, and whatever happens to them on the way, in their enchanted place on top of the forest, a little bear will always be waiting.
Tigger: Honey! Oh, boy, honey! That's what tiggers like best.
Winnie the Pooh: I was afraid of that.
Tigger: [gulps down a few handfuls] Oh, say.
[chuckles, then smacks]
Tigger: Yyyyyuck! Tiggers don't like honey!
Winnie the Pooh: But you said you that you liked...
Tigger: Yeah, that icky, sticky stuff is only fit for heffalumps and woozles.
Winnie the Pooh: You mean elephants and weasels.
Tigger: That's what I said, heffalumps and woozles.
Rabbit: [drawing on Pooh's backside when he's stuck in Rabbit's door] Oh Pooh! You messed up my moose!
Christopher Robin: Pooh, promise you won't forget me, ever?
Winnie the Pooh: Oh, I won't, Christopher, I promise.
Christopher Robin: Not even when I'm a hundred?
Winnie the Pooh: How old shall I be then?
Christopher Robin: Ninety-nine.
Christopher Robin: [chuckles] Silly old bear.
Christopher Robin: There now. Did I get your tail back on properly, Eeyore?
Eeyore: No matter. Most likely lose it again anyway.
Winnie the Pooh: Good morning, Christopher Robin.
Christopher Robin: Oh, good morning, Winnie the Pooh.
Eeyore: If it is a good morning, which I doubt.
Winnie the Pooh: [after rolling in mud] There, now.
[giggles, then hops out of the mud puddle]
Winnie the Pooh: Isn't this a clever disguise?
Christopher Robin: What are you supposed to be?
Winnie the Pooh: [looking himself over] I'm a little, black rain cloud, of course.
Christopher Robin: [giggles] Silly old bear.
Winnie the Pooh: [in a sticky voice] I must be going now. Goodbye, Rabbit.
Rabbit: Well, goodbye, if you're sure you won't have any more.
Winnie the Pooh: [turns to leave then stops] *Is* there any more?
Rabbit: No, there isn't.
Winnie the Pooh: I thought not.
Winnie the Pooh: [tries to climb out the front door but is stuck] Oh, oh, help and bother! I'm stuck.
Rabbit: Oh, dear. Oh, gracious. Oh. Well, it all comes from eating too much.
Winnie the Pooh: It all comes from not having front doors big enough!
Winnie the Pooh: Could you ssspare a sssmall sssmackerel?
Gopher: Say, you ought to do sssomething about that ssspeech impediment, sssonny.
Narrator: Now, Piglet lived in the middle of the forest in a very grand house in the middle of a beech tree. And Piglet loved it very much.
Piglet: Whew, yes. Whoops. You see, it's been in the family a long time. It belonged to my grandfather.
Piglet: [pointing to sign] Oh, that's his name up there. "Trespassers Will." That's short for "Trespassers William."
Narrator: Trespassers William?
Piglet: Yes. And Grandma, oh, she called him T.W. That's even shorter.
Piglet: I don't mind the leaves that are leaving, it's the leaves that are coming.
Winnie the Pooh: Happy "Winds-day", Piglet.
Piglet: [being blown away] Well... it isn't... very happy... f-for me.
Winnie the Pooh: Where are you going, Piglet?
Piglet: That's what I'm asking myself, where?
[the wind lifts him up]
Piglet: W-Whoops! P-P-P-Pooh!
Winnie the Pooh: [grabbing Piglet's scarf] And what do you think you will answer yourself?
Tigger: [looking at his reflection] Oh, hey, hey. Look, look, look. Oh, what a strange-looking creature. Mmm, look at those beady little eyes, and that "purrposterous" chin, and those "rickydickorous" striped py-jamas!
Winnie the Pooh: Looks like another tigger to me.
Tigger: Oh, no, it's not. I'm the only tigger.
Tigger: Watch me scare the stripes off of this imposter.
[Tigger growls at his reflection; he scares himself, and hides under Pooh's table]
Tigger: Is-Is-Is... Is he gone?
Winnie the Pooh: All except the tail.
[Tigger tucks his tail]
Winnie the Pooh: He's gone.
Winnie the Pooh: [to his reflection] Oh, hello. Am I glad to see you. It's more friendly with two. Now, you go that way, and I'll go this way.
Winnie the Pooh: [walks away from mirror, then runs back] You didn't see anything, did you? Neither did I.
Winnie the Pooh: [to his reflection] Is it raining in there? It's raining out here, too.
Piglet: Pooh, for a bear of very little brain, you sure are a smart one.
Winnie the Pooh: Thank you, Piglet.
Tigger: Say, who are you?
Narrator: I'm the narrator.
Tigger: Oh, well, please, for goodness' sakes, narrate me down from here.
Tigger: [singing; repeated lines] The wonderful thing about tiggers / Is tiggers are wonderful things / Their tops are made out of rubber / Their bottoms are made out of springs / They're bouncy, trouncy, flouncy, pouncy, fun, fun, fun, fun, fun / Oh but the most wonderful thing about tiggers is I'm the only one / IIIII'm the only one.
Winnie the Pooh: Is anybody at home?
Winnie the Pooh: What I said was, "Is anybody at home?"
Winnie the Pooh: Bother. Isn't there anybody here at all?
Rabbit: [hurriedly puts dishes away] Nobody!
Winnie the Pooh: Must be somebody there, because *somebody* must have said "Nobody."
[Tigger had found a lost Rabbit and is rushing him out of the misty woods]
Narrator: Rabbit was now a humiliated rabbit, a lost-and-found rabbit, and a "Why, oh why do these things happen to me?" rabbit.
[Tigger has been freed from the tree after promising never to bounce again]
Tigger: [ecstatic] Oh, I'm so happy, I feel like bouncing!
[he leaps into the air to bounce, but Rabbit stops him in mid-leap]
Rabbit: Ah-ah-ah! You promised, you promised!
Tigger: [falling back down sadly] Oh, I did, didn't I? You mean I-I can't ever bounce again?
Tigger: [traumatized] Never?
[he lips quivers]
Tigger: N-Not even just - one teensy-weensy bounce?
Rabbit: [defiantly] Not even a smidgen of a bounce!
Winnie the Pooh: The only reason for being a bee is to make honey. And the only reason for making honey is so I can eat it.
Narrator: And so we come to the last chapter, in which Pooh and Christopher Robin go to the enchanted part of the forest, and we say goodbye.
Winnie the Pooh: Goodbye? Oh no, please. Can't we just go back to page one and start all over again?
Narrator: Sorry, Pooh, but all stories have an ending, you know.
Winnie the Pooh: Oh, bother.
Narrator: Winnie the Pooh crawled out of the gorse bush, brushed the prickles from his nose and began to think again.
Winnie the Pooh: Think, think, think.
Narrator: And the first person he thought of was...
Winnie the Pooh: Winnie the Pooh?
Narrator: No. Christopher Robin.
Winnie the Pooh: Oh.
Owl: Blast it all.
Gopher: Good idea! We'll dynamite. Save time.
Owl: Eh, what's the charge?
Gopher: The charge? Oh, about seven sticks of dynamite.
Owl: Oh, no, no, no, the cost! The charge in money.
Gopher: Nope, no charge account. I work strictly cash.
Owl: Obviously, but, I should think...
Gopher: Well, I can't stand around lollygagging all day. I got a tight schedule.
Gopher: [falls down a hole] Aaaaaaaahh.
Gopher: If you think it over, let me know. You got my card, I'm not in the book, you know.
Owl: Oh. Dash it all, he's gone.
Winnie the Pooh: After all, he's not in the book, you know.
Kanga: Pooh, Roo has a little surprise for you.
Winnie the Pooh: Honeysuckle!
[Pooh tries to eat flowers]
Kanga: No, Pooh, you don't eat them. You smell them.
Winnie the Pooh: Oh.
Tigger: Hello, I'm Tigger!
Winnie the Pooh: You said that.
Tigger: Oh. Well, did I say I was hungry?
Winnie the Pooh: I don't think so.
Tigger: Well, then I'll say it: I'm hungry.
Tigger: I "recoggonize" you. You're the one that's stuffed with fluff.
Winnie the Pooh: Yeah. And you're sitting on it.
Tigger: Yeah. And it's comfy, too!
Tigger: Come on, Rabbit. Let's you and me bounce, huh?
Rabbit: Good heavens! M-m-me bounce?
Tigger: [joyfully] Why, certainly! Look, you've got the feet for it.
Rabbit: I have?
[dances hurriedly with Rabbit]
Tigger: Come on, try it. It makes ya feel just grrreat!
Winnie the Pooh: Well, isn't that the Rabbit's voice?
Rabbit: [talking into a honey jar] I don't think so. It isn't meant to be.
Narrator: This could be the room of any small boy, but it just happens to belong to a boy named Christopher Robin. Like most small boys, Christopher Robin has toy animals to play with, and they all live together in a wonderful world of make-believe. But his best friend is a bear called Winnie the Pooh, or Pooh, for short. Now, Pooh had some very unusual adventures, and they all happened right here in the Hundred-Acre Wood.
Roo: [swinging on Tigger's tail] Don't swing on a swing. / It's much too frail. / The best kind of swing / Is a Tigger's tail. Whee!
Tigger: [Sitting on Pooh's stomach] And who are you?
Winnie the Pooh: I'm Pooh.
Tigger: Oh, Pooh.
Tigger: Sure! Uh - what's a pooh?
Winnie the Pooh: You're sitting on one.
[in spite of the heavy rainfall that floods the Hundred Acre Wood, Eeyore stubbornly sticks to his task of house-hunting for Owl and sees a flooded-out house]
Eeyore: There's one. Cozy cottage. Nice location. Bit damp for Owl, though.
Roo: I bet you can climb trees, huh, Tigger?
Tigger: Climb trees? Hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo! Why, that's what tiggers do best! Only tiggers don't climb trees, they *bounce* 'em! Come on, let's go! Hoo-hoo-hoo-hoo!
Gopher: First thing to be done is, uh, get rid of that bear; he's jamming up the whole project.
Owl: Dash it all, he *is* the project!
Rabbit: He budged! Hooray! "Chistopher Crabin!" Uh, uh, "Chrostofer Raban!" He bidged! He badged! He booged! Today's the day!
Rabbit: Why did I ever invite that bear to lunch? Why, oh, why, oh, why?
Christopher Robin: Pooh, what's your favorite thing in the whole world?
Winnie the Pooh: My favorite thing is me coming to visit you, and then you ask, "How about a small smackeral of honey?"
Christopher Robin: I like that, too. But what I like most of all is just doing nothing.
Winnie the Pooh: How do you do just nothing?
Christopher Robin: Well, when grown-ups ask, "What are you going to do?" and you say, "Nothing," and then you go and do it.
Winnie the Pooh: I like that. Let's do it all the time.
Christopher Robin: You know something, Pooh? I'm not going to do just nothing anymore.
Winnie the Pooh: You mean, never again?
Christopher Robin: Well, not so much.
Winnie the Pooh: I sure like bouncing. Wasn't that fun, Piglet?
Piglet: Y-yes, but the best part is when it stops.
Narrator: Well, in the next chapter, there's a great deal of bouncing.
Piglet: There is? Oh. I-I have something I forgot to do today, and I shaln't be able to do tomorrow, so I 'spose I have to go back and do it n-now. Good-bye, Pooh.
Winnie the Pooh: Good-bye, Piglet. Now, is the next chapter all about me?
Narrator: No, it's mostly about Tigger.
Winnie the Pooh: Oh, bother.
Narrator: But you're in it.
Winnie the Pooh: Oh, good. What will I be doing?
Narrator: Well, Pooh, you'll be sitting in your Thoughtful Spot, thinking as usual.
Gopher: If I was you, I'd think about skedaddlin' out of here.
Winnie the Pooh: Why?
Gopher: 'Cause it's "Winds-day."
Owl: This is just a mild spring zephyr compared to the big wind of '67. Or was it, uh, '76? Oh, well, no matter. Oh, I remember the big blow well.
Piglet: I'll remember this one, too.
Owl: It was the year my Aunt Clara went to visit her cousin. Now, her cousin was not only gifted on the glockenspiel, but being a screech owl, also sang soprano in the London Opera.
Winnie the Pooh: [as Piglet shoves a honey pot into his face; muffled] Thank you, Piglet.
Owl: You see, her constant praticing so unnerved my aunt that she laid a seagull egg by mistake. Oooooohhhhhh!
Winnie the Pooh: [opening his door] Hello, out there! Oh, I hope nobody answers.
Winnie the Pooh: Look, look, Piglet. There's something in that tree over there.
Piglet: Is it one of the f-f-fiercer animals?
Winnie the Pooh: Yes. It's a "jagular."
Piglet: W-What do "jagulars" d-do, Pooh?
Winnie the Pooh: Well, "jagulars" always call,
Winnie the Pooh: "Halloo!" And when you look up, they drop on you.
Piglet: I'm looking *down*, P-P-Pooh.
Christopher Robin: You're next, Tigger. Jump!
Tigger: Er, jump? Tiggers don't jump, they bounce.
Winnie the Pooh: Then bounce down.
Tigger: Don't be "ridickorous"; Tiggers only bounce up!
Christopher Robin: You can climb down, Tigger.
Tigger: Ah, but tiggers can't climb down, uh, uh, because, uh... oh, oh their tails get in the way!
Rabbit: Hooray! That settles it. If he won't jump, and he can't climb down, then we'll just have to leave him up there forever!
Narrator: Winnie the Pooh lived in this enchanted forest under the name of Sanders, which means he had the name over the door in gold letters, and he lived under it.
Roo: [swings off Tigger's tail to another branch] What's the matter, Tigger?
Tigger: Phew-ah, thank goodness, I was just getting seasick from...
Tigger: seeing too much.
Narrator: Yes, the time has come at last. Christopher Robin was heading off to school. No one else in the forest knew why or where he was going, just that it had something to do with twice-times, and how to make things called ABCs, and where a place called Brazil is.
[Gopher is about to give Pooh his pot of honey, even though Pooh is stuck in Rabbit's door, but Rabbit grabs it first]
Rabbit: No, no, no, no, no! Not one drop!
Winnie the Pooh: But Rabbit, I wasn't going to eat it. I was just gonna taste it.
Rabbit: I'll taste it for you!
Narrator: And now, we come to the next chapter in which...
Winnie the Pooh: But I haven't finished yet.
Narrator: But Pooh, you're in the next chapter.
Winnie the Pooh: Oh. Well, what happens to me?
Narrator: Well, let's turn the page and find out.
Tigger: [while Roo is swinging on his tail] S-s-s-s-s-stop that, kid, please!
[cut to his point of view]
Tigger: S-T-O-P! Stop! You're rocking the forest!
Winnie the Pooh: Uh, R-Rabbit?
Winnie the Pooh: Say, Rabbit, how would it be if as soon as we're outside of this old pit, we just try to find it again?
Rabbit: [baffled] What's the good of that?
Winnie the Pooh: Well, y'see, we keep looking for home, but we keep finding this pit, so I just thought that if we looked for this pit, we might find home.
Rabbit: Hm, I don't see much sense in that - if I walked away from this pit, then walked back to it - of course I shall find it! I'll prove it to you! Wait here!
Winnie the Pooh: Christopher Robin... I think the bees - S-U-S-P-E-C-T something.
Christopher Robin: Perhaps they think you're after their honey.
Winnie the Pooh: Well, it may be that. You never can tell with bees.
Gopher: That supercilious scoundrel confiscated my honey.
Winnie the Pooh: Christopher Robin, can you make a one-hero party into a two-hero party?
Christopher Robin: Of course we can, silly old bear.
Tigger: Well, I gotta go now. I've got a lotta bouncin' to do.
Tigger: T-T-F-N: ta-ta for now!
Winnie the Pooh: Hum dum de dum, hum dum de dum / I am so rumbly in my tumbly.
Winnie the Pooh: [hits head] Ooh!
Winnie the Pooh: Time to munch an early luncheon / Hum de dum dum dum / Oh, I wouldn't climb this tree / If a Pooh flew like a bee / But I wouldn't be a bear then / So I guess I wouldn't care then / Bears love honey and I'm a Pooh bear / So I do care, so I climb there / I'm so rumbly in my tumbly / Time for something... for something...
Winnie the Pooh: [branch breaks] ... sweet! To eat!
Winnie the Pooh: [after the balloon he's flying on deflates] Oh, bother. I think I shall come down.