Freaky Friday (1976)
Mrs. Andrews: Honestly, Bill, that child hasn't got a clue about my life, not a single clue.
Mrs. Schmauss: Where do I start, honey?
Annabel (as Mrs. Andrews): In the kitchen. We had a little problem this morning.
Mrs. Schmauss: What happened?
Annabel (as Mrs. Andrews): Well, the washing machine went bananas and uh...
Mrs. Schmauss: [suddenly we enter the next scene, in the laundry room just after the kitchen] Well, lets take a look and see what's going on.
[she opens the washing machine lid, and very instantly sees that it's overloaded]
Mrs. Schmauss: Oh no! No! Well no wonder.
[starts taking them out piece by piece]
Mrs. Schmauss: You're going to cram your shirts, and your rugs, and your hose, and your sneakers, and some little tin things. What are these little tin things? Oh jacks! That's cute. That's cute! And all of your jacks in here together, not to mention you used too much soap. That is your problem.
[shuts the lid]
Annabel (as Mrs. Andrews): Well, that's what comes of letting Annabel help with the laundry. That sweet thing trying to be helpful.
Mrs. Schmauss: A genuine first?
[rolls her eyes]
Mrs. Schmauss: Ugh!
Annabel Andrews, Mrs. Ellen Andrews: [about each other, from two different places at the same time, they are saying the magic word which suddenly makes them unintentionally switch] I wish I could switch places with her for just one day.
[Annabelle and her mother have already just got their own bodies back, but stayed in the same places that they were switched, and it looks to Boris and Ben like she and her mother just did an impossible trick]
Boris Harris, the Neighbor: Hey Annabelle, where did you come from?
Annabel Andrews: Don't ask me.
Ben Andrews: Where did Mom go?
Annabel Andrews: Don't ask me.
Ben Andrews: Can you do that again?
Annabel Andrews: I hope not.
Annabel (as Mrs. Andrews): I was only kidding, Daddy.
Mr. William Waring 'Bill' Andrews: Daddy? You never called me "Daddy" before?
Annabel (as Mrs. Andrews): [covering up the problem] Oh, and I never will again, Bill, Dear.
Annabel (as Mrs. Andrews): Do this... do that... everybody's had breakfast but me!
[rummages in the fridge]
Annabel (as Mrs. Andrews): Ah! Macaroni and cheese, breakfast at last.
Mrs. Ellen Andrews (as Annabel): Too late, Miss. Gibbons, I've already seen your action!
Mrs. Ellen Andrews: you know, Borris, I do believe this is the first time you've ever gotten a chance to see our lovely, lovely home... it's simple, yet elegant!
Mr. William Waring 'Bill' Andrews: What's going on in there?
Annabel (as Mrs. Andrews): Something really freaky!
Mrs. Andrews (as Annabel): What is this?
Virginia: Your usual rum raisin banana-split breakfast.
Mrs. Andrews (as Annabel): Of course! what else would the junk food junkie eat for breakfast?
[looking at the girls, who are staring]
Mrs. Andrews (as Annabel): You notice something different about me, right? Something different?
Annabel Andrews: As a dad you're terrific. As a husband, you're more like a traffic cop!
Annabel Andrews: This is my room. Don't knock it, I like it this way, you don't have to find anything.
Annabel Andrews: Hey! Whose foot is that? That's not MY foot... that's Mom's foot! And those are Mom's legs
[feels her legs and works up]
Annabel Andrews: ... and, and her stomach, and her uh... uh...
Mrs. Andrews: [as Annabel, thinking] No wonder Annabel's always walking around barefoot, these sneakers feel like they're full of marbles.
Annabel (as Mrs. Andrews): Exploding mousse and burnt turkey! Boris how could you do this?
Ben Andrews: Boy mom that was terrific, that's even better than Annabel can do and she's a super ball player.
Annabel (as Mrs. Andrews): Really?
Ben Andrews: And she's beautiful.
Annabel (as Mrs. Andrews): She's what?
Ben Andrews: I think she's beautiful and I love her braces. I hope when I get that old I'll have braces too.
Annabel (as Mrs. Andrews): With in luck you won't need braces.
Ben Andrews: That's what I'm afraid of, now Annabel going to hate me more than she does now. Well why does she hate me so much?
Annabel (as Mrs. Andrews): Because there's nothing more annoying in the whole entire world with a little blue eyed saint, with perfect teeth, who's always on time, never has a messy room.
Ben Andrews: Do you hate me too?
Annabel (as Mrs. Andrews): Don't be a jackass I'm just trying to tell you why Annabel hates you.
Ben Andrews: But I can't help those things, I can't help what I look like and about being neat, I can't help that either. Listen if I thought she'd bite me I might be better being famous, I even try being messy. Once I took all my piled up blocks and the books on the shelf, and a big bag of marbles and Lego's and threw them in the middle of the room so Annabel wouldn't be the only one getting in trouble. Do you want to know what happened? That stinky old Mrs. Schmauss said I was too young to know any better and picked everything up. So no matter what I do Annabel keeps on hating me.
Annabel (as Mrs. Andrews): Well, why don't you hate her back? That's a good idea.
Ben Andrews: I told you before I tried. But you can't hate someone and love them at the same time can you mom?
Annabel (as Mrs. Andrews): No I didn't used to think so.
Annabel Andrews: [Annabel thinks] Maybe you can.
Annabel (as Mrs. Andrews): Now blow. Feel better now?
[Annabel holds up the tissue to Ben's nose]
Ben Andrews: Uh huh.
Annabel (as Mrs. Andrews): Come on let's go home.
Mrs. Ellen Andrews: Annabel, how do you like yourself?
Annabel Andrews: I'm not sure yet.
Mrs. Ellen Andrews: Annabel, about your hair, I swear they only took off an inch and a half. And I bought you a new outfit, but you don't have to wear it. YOUR TEETH! Don't you like your teeth now?
Annabel Andrews: Mom, I'm not talking about how I look, I'm talking about how I am. I'm a lot smarter than I realized I am, and a lot dumber too.
Annabel (as Mrs. Andrews): Male chauvinist pig!
Ben Andrews: Why did you call Daddy a male chauvinist pig?
Annabel (as Mrs. Andrews): Because he is one!
Ben Andrews: But what does that mean?
Annabel (as Mrs. Andrews): It means he spends 3 months taking bow for a ceremony, then when it backfires he expects you to pull it together in 3 hours!
Annabel (as Mrs. Andrews): Male chauvinist pig!
Ben Andrews: Mr. Dilk too?
Annabel (as Mrs. Andrews): No, still your father.
Mrs. Ellen Andrews (as Annabel): [to herself, going through a day at school] How're you supposed to win? One side snubs you if you don't do well, the other side snubs you if you DO do well.
Boris Harris, the Neighbor: You and your little boy have the same sized feet?
Annabel (as Mrs. Andrews): Yes, I told you he's peculiar.
Annabel (as Mrs. Andrews): [on phone] Boris, this is Mrs. Andrews across the street. Could I borrow a cup of...
Annabel Andrews: [thinks] Sugar's too corny.
Annabel (as Mrs. Andrews): [sees Max chewing on cereal box] Kibble? Kibble. K-I-B-B-L-E, that's right, the stuff dogs eat.
Mrs. Andrews (as Annabel): Could I trouble you for a dime, dear?
Virginia: [shocked] Could-I-trouble-you-for-a-dime-dear?
Annabel (as Mrs. Andrews): We're having a pickup lunch. Pick up anything you want and put everything else back in the bag.
Ben Andrews: [takes bottle out] Gin?
Annabel (as Mrs. Andrews): Ahhh!
[takes it back]
Annabel (as Mrs. Andrews): That's the wrong bag!
Opposing Coach: Now listen, girls, I've taught you to play fair, to play clean, and with good sportsmanship. Still, the name of the game is winning, and we can only win this one if you remember one thing: GET ANNABEL ANDREWS AND GET HER GOOD!
Annabel Andrews: I'm not falling for that again, the last time I got my hair trimmed they chopped six whole inches off!
Mrs. Andrews (as Annabel): [needing bus fare] Virginia could you possibly...
Virginia: No I couldn't possibly! I know you've got more change than that, Annabel, I've seen the way you walk.
Mrs. Andrews (as Annabel): The way I walk?
Mrs. Andrews: [thinks] Of course!
[takes off her shoe and coins scatter]