5 May 1977
24 September 1977
Stubing's ex-wife, who has remarried a cruise line exec, drives Stubing and crew crazy with demands. Former centerfold Sandy Rytell hides old nude photos from her fiancé. Jenny O'Brien tries to get her boyfriend Ron Baker to marry her.
1 October 1977
Dale Reinhart pursues the girl who dumped him and dresses in drag to get the only available cabin. Bickering Maury and Stella Marshall get stuck in a elevator. Janette Bradford is followed by the P.I. her husband hired to keep tabs on her.
8 October 1977
Barney Mason (Robert Reed
) and his ex-wife Terry Larsen (Loretta Swit
) meet on the cruise with their new spouses (Pamela Bellwood
and Richard Mulligan
); Julie's (Lauren Tewes
) love interest Jim Wright's (Charles Frank
) chaperoning of senior citizens leaves little time for them to be together; teenagers Graham (Scott Baio
) and Kelly (Kristy McNichol
) find puppy love, together.
15 October 1977
Tennis pro Maureen Mitchell (Brenda Benet
) runs into sportswriter John Ballard (Bill Bixby
), who defamed her in his column. Cyril Wolfe (Milton Berle
) annoys his wife Anita (Audra Lindley
) and fellow passengers (Lynn Adams
and Britt Leach
) with constant practical jokes. Mexican April Lopez (Charo
) stows away in a laundry hamper.
22 October 1977
Isaac's (Ted Lange
) favorite singer, Roxy Blue (Diahann Carroll
), becomes his lover. Talky Robert Tanner's (Jim Nabors
) popularity increases when fellow passengers think he may be a jewel thief. Bert Fredericks (David Groh
) plans his wife Denise's (Michele Lee
) birthday party, but she thinks it's a murder plot.
29 October 1977
Has-been comic Barry Keys asks Julie to let him entertain on board to return a favor. Mrs. Warner is determined to marry off her granddaughter Shirley. College pals bet on whether virginal Dan changes his status before the cruise ends.
10 November 1977
Identical twins share a ticket and confuse Doc. Julie's old heartthrob is on the cruise alone but no longer married. And an old couple who honeymooned on the Titanic are thought to be a jinx as strange things happen to crew members.
19 November 1977
Theo Denison Jr buys a cruise with his own money and doesn't tell his parents. Sharon can't release the pain of her son's death. Julie's protégé Connie is after Julie's job. Maisie and Durwood are a married couple traveling as singles.
26 November 1977
The Captain's father drives Merrill nuts, then takes a liking to crew member P.J. Muldoon. Passenger Donald Flanders is trapped in his cabin by an attack dog. Three college friends play romantic games with the ship's repairman's feelings.
3 December 1977
Advice columnist Beverly Blanchard (Eva Gabor
) neglects her husband, Russ (Leslie Nielsen
), who thus spends time with a fellow passenger (Stephanie Blackmore
). Capt. Stubing (Gavin MacLeod
) wages war with a visiting chef, Antonio Borga (Al Molinaro
). Julie's (Lauren Tewes
) friend, Jeff Smith (Robert Urich
), is separated from his wife, Gail (Pamela Franklin
), but doesn't know that she's on board and carrying his child.
10 December 1977
At Christmas, a lonely Capt. Stubing (Gavin MacLeod
) alienates the crew by his lack of Christmas spirit. Ex-convict Dan Barton (John Gavin
) meets his double-crossing law partner Walter Perry (Dean Santoro
) on board and plans to get revenge, for being convicted of the crime the partner committed. Paul and Audrey Baynes (Shecky Greene
and Florence Henderson
) fantasize about divorcing each other. Minister Father Mike (Dick Sargent
) chaperones six orphans back to the orphanage in Mexico.
24 December 1977
An older man finds a teenage stowaway in his bathroom. Julie falls for one of her brother's friends, whose cabin mate urges him to pursue her. Julie hires inept painters to paint the Captain's suite in his favorite color.
7 January 1978
Stories include: a reprobate steward (Bob Crane
), cute honeymooners (Kathy Bates
, John Rubinstein
), and a financially strapped supermarket cashier (Bruce Solomon) posing as a wealthy, advertising executive.
14 January 1978
Isaac's mom and her male companion share a cabin. Julie books divorced entertainers Lenny and Mitzy, who can't get along together. Gopher hides a thieving chimpanzee that brings him in contact with a nose job patient.
21 January 1978
A husband and wife (Fernando Lamas
and Michele Lee
), as a famous Hollywood couple, arrive with paparazzi. She is adorned in a famous gigantic diamond which, of course, entices dim-witted bumbling crooks (Harold Gould
, Karen Valentine
, Larry Storch
and John Schuck
), in a delightful caper reminiscent of old Hollywood. A husband (Dan Rowan
) is chagrined into bringing his wife (Juliet Mills
) on the cruise when she finds the tickets for his mistress (Adrienne Barbeau
) and himself, with some unexpected surprises. Two former attendees of a blind school (Desi Arnaz Jr.
and Stephanie Zimbalist
) are reunited. A masquerade night moves the plots right along.
21 January 1978
The bumbling gang of thieves (Harold Gould
, Karen Valentine
, Larry Storch
and John Schuck
) believe they have finally figured out a way to nab the elusive diamond, even as its owner (Michele Lee
) comes to her own drastic decision on its fate; a blind woman (Stephanie Zimbalist
) wonders if she can be happy with a former blind friend (Desi Arnaz Jr.
), who has regained his sight; and a man's (Dan Rowan
) wife (Juliet Mills
) and mistress (Adrienne Barbeau
) discover who each other are.
28 January 1978
Rick imperils his girlfriend Suzy's chances of winning a beauty contest. Reporter Robin tries to write a story on scandal-tainted Congressman Whitcomb. Stephanie balks at fellow passenger Virgil's boisterous behavior.
4 February 1978
Stubing's clumsy nephew comes on board to be trained to work on ships, but has a secret. Thief Bill hooks up with female passenger Stephanie, who's a cop. Rose Higby feels neglected when her sister Noreen meets a male passenger.
11 February 1978
Melanie is popular with men while her friend Jane is ignored. Brian Sherwood spends a lot of time with a younger woman. The staff try to figure out which passenger is the Cruise Lines inspector. A Russian man repeats the same phrase.
13 February 1978
Passenger Lily is haunted by an amnesia victim. Computer-dating service manager Nick woos Julie and offers his matchmaking services for Valentine's Day. Americans Brigitte and Yvonne pretend to be French in order to get men and gifts.
18 February 1978
An older married couple (Robert Mandan
and Audrey Meadows
) turns newlyweds (Robert Urich
and Diana Canova
) against one another with their bickering; a male passenger (Harvey Jason
) uses a dating manual to hit on a woman (Georgia Engel
) with a protective father (Herb Voland
); a man (Harry Morgan
) cheats the crew out of their emergency fund, to pay the passage for him and his wife (Priscilla Morrill
25 February 1978
Young man Bruce's (Mark Shera
) parents (Monty Hall
and Janis Paige
) are determined to have him date other women on the cruise and not settle on marrying "Ginger", who is not on board. So, Bruce and a fellow passenger (Laurie Prange
) get together. A man (Leslie Nielsen
) is having second thoughts, about age differences, in marrying a woman ('Lynda Day George' ) who is 21 years younger. A new nurse (Elaine Joyce
), on staff for the cruise, is a pretty ex-showgirl. Of course, Doc (Bernie Kopell
) is hitting on her, and is a bit frustrated, when she does not return his advances.
6 May 1978
A spunky gossip reporter (Marcia Wallace
) is aboard to write an expose of lust on the high seas. A shy man (Paul Williams
) has one week to marry or lose his inheritance. A woman (Barbara Rhoades
) moves out of her chauvinist fiancé's (Richard Gautier
) cabin. A suburban widow (Michele Lee
) impersonates a glamorous Hollywood socialite.
13 May 1978
A former prostitute (Caren Kaye
) is harassed by an unhappy, married client (Jack Carter
), who threatens to expose her. Captain Stubing (Gavin MacLeod
) crash diets for his high school flame (Jessica Walter
), who no longer sees him as "Stringbean Stubing". Two depressed widowers (Annette Funicello
and Michael Callan
) find comfort with each other.
20 May 1978
An Asian businessman pushes his associate to loosen up a woman whose business he wants to buy. Rebellious Vanessa goads Gopher into standing up to bossy Stubing. Andrea wonders where she's going in her relationship with a married man.
16 September 1978
Isaac (Ted Lange
) is on vacation and decides to go on the cruise, as a passenger. He acts like a jerk and hooks up with another passenger (Lola Falana
) and doesn't tell her what he does. Among the other passengers is a woman (Donna Mills
), searching for her birth mother, who is also on the cruise, and she wants to go see her but is too afraid to. She meets another passenger (David Birney
) and they hit it off. A rich girl (Barbi Benton
), who just got dumped at the altar, is very mean and Doc (Bernie Kopell
) sets out to help her. A couple (Edie Adams
and Avery Schreiber
) who are in a rut and are considering separating. An old woman (Audra Lindley
), who is not all there. Stubing's (Gavin MacLeod
) Deputy Captain (Dick Martin
), is there to be groomed for when he's made Captain but he's a bit incompetent. When the deputy captain gets a message that there's a hurricane coming, he's suppose to give it to Stubing but runs into the old woman (Lindley), who is lost and he uses the message to draw her a map and she takes the map with her and he forgets about the message. Stubing decides to go to an island and the rich girl, the couple and old lady join him, along with Doc, Gopher (Fred Grandy
) and Julie (Lauren Tewes
). But when they get there, they find a hermit (John Astin
), who holds them captive.
16 September 1978
Conclusion. The captain (Gavin MacLeod
) and his marooned group struggle to survive on the island during a hurricane; the woman (Donna Mills
) looking for her birth mother (Laraine Day
) makes a startling discovery; and Isaacs (Ted Lange
) tries to save the ship from the storm, while trying to regain Mara (Lola Falana
23 September 1978
Tomboy Rosemary "Rocky" Simpson (Melissa Gilbert
) has a shipboard romance with teenager Norman (Jimmy Baio
); Julie's (Lauren Tewes
) parents (Betty Garrett
and Norman Fell
) break the news that they are getting a divorce; two prudes, Marion (James Coco
) and Patricia (Dody Goodman
), are booked into the same cabin, because Marion is a man who has a female name.
30 September 1978
A womanizer (David Doyle
) hits on three women (Jo Ann Pflug
, Brett Somers
, Cathryn Damon
) and they're all taken with him. But, what he doesn't know, is that they're friends and traveling together. The Captain's (Gavin MacLeod
) godson (Grant Goodeve
) brings his wife (Bess Armstrong
) on the cruise for a belated honeymoon, because he was called to military service and was away for two years. Two brothers (Sonny Bono
and Marty Ingels
) come on board to sue the cruise line, by having one of them fake an injury. The crew suspects he's faking but, unless they can get him to stand up, they're at the brothers' mercy. And, the one pretending to be injured (Bono), is attracted to a fellow passenger (Judy Landers
14 October 1978
A publisher (Gene Barry
)'s neglected wife (Hope Lange
) falls for the author (Richard Mulligan
) of a long-awaited book; Capt. Stubing's lecherous uncle (Red Buttons
) chases Julie, relentlessly; a businessman's (Allen Ludden
) daughter (Mackenzie Phillips
) uses her charms (on Sam Groom
) to close a potential merger of her father's company.
21 October 1978
A shy guy (Billy Crystal
) dons a mask and goes around kissing every girl on the ship. Then, he meets a girl (Laurie Walters
) with whom he connects. A couple (Marilyn McCoo
and Billy Davis Jr.
), who are Isaac's (Ted Lange
) friends and with whom they performed on the streets in their youth, are now successful and rich and have a young son (Todd Bridges
). But, his father spends more time on work than with his son. And, a woman (Toni Tennille
) follows a man (Robert Reed
), whom she knows witnessed what happened to someone she cares about and urges him to come forward and tell what he saw.
28 October 1978
The Amazing Alonzo (Vincent Price
) performs illusions for his adoring fans (Jane Kean
, Iris Adrian
and Bibi Osterwald
) while neglecting his fiancé (Joan Blondell
). A boy (Charlie Aiken
) and his friend tell lies to the crew to get attention, while his parents (Gary Collins
and Mary Ann Mobley
) are not aware of his mischief. Julie's (Lauren Tewes
) friend (Barbara Anderson
), a former model, comes aboard after suffering a car accident, leaving her face scarred.
4 November 1978
Capt. Stubing (Gavin MacLeod
) is reunited with an old friend (Jill Whelan
); former songwriter Charlie (Robert Goulet
) encounters his ex-partner Burt (Richard Dawson
) on board; secretary Sandy (Jo Anne Worley
) takes a cruise with her boss Victor (Soupy Sales
), after they get drunk at a party; a Soviet cruise line Commissar (Loretta Swit
) falls for Doc (Bernie Kopell
11 November 1978
Widow Ellen Garner is followed by her husband Mickey's ghost who tries to fix her up. Divorced Les and Gail see their daughter and her husband off but get locked in an unused cabin. Gopher's sister Jennifer makes a beeline for Doc.
18 November 1978
Reverend Whitney's blind date faces scorn from parishioner Barbara Sharp. Bert Wilder helps his wife Audrey deal with being blind. Princess engineer Tony's vacation plans change, so Julie and Gopher invite his family on a free cruise.
25 November 1978
Two buddies (Richard Gilliland
and Adam Arkin
) make a bet - for a pizza - to see who can get a date with Julie (Lauren Tewes
). A man (Orson Bean
) hopes to have a romantic relationship with his matinée idol crush (Rhonda Fleming
), but he is intimidated by her fame and they seem to have repeated bad timing. A young man (Edward Albert
) brings his parents on board for their 25th wedding anniversary and he runs into a girl (Patty McCormack
) from home, to whom he is attracted. The problem is that his parents (Billy Barty
and Patty Maloney
) are little people and the young woman inadvertently reveals that little people make her uncomfortable.
2 December 1978
The Captain (Gavin MacLeod
) is expecting a prestigious award but the presenter (Pat Harrington Jr.
) may not be whom he expects it to be; Doc (Bernie Kopell
) becomes attached to an elderly couple (John McIntire
and Jeanette Nolan
) from his hometown, only to have to perform a life-threatening operation on the woman; and a recently divorced man (Bert Convy
) runs into the lawyer (Leigh Taylor-Young
) who represented his ex-wife in the divorce.
9 December 1978
Larry and Cybill Hartman (Robert Urich
and Heather Menzies-Urich
) wanted to adopt a baby but end up with Pepito, a streetwise orphan (Gabriel Melgar
); Doc and Stubing fall for Julie's friend, Karen Maynard (Connie Stevens
); Wes and Renee Larson (Dave Madden
and Dena Dietrich
) and their friend, April Dunlevy, (Rue McClanahan
) plan a business deal with a former executive (Dabney Coleman
), who is a fraud.
16 December 1978
Julie (Lauren Tewes
) falls in love with a man (Tony Roberts
) and his daughters (Annrae Walterhouse
and Melora Hardin
). Will she leave the ship for Alaska? Twins (Cyb Barnstable
and Patricia Barnstable
), unhappy with their perspective spouses (David Nelson
and Fred Travalena
), switch places. A separated couple (Ruth Buzzi
and Sid Caesar
) are assigned to the same cabin; they and their dummies entertain the passengers.
13 January 1979
Irene Austin (Martha Raye
) agrees to meet her college classmate, Andy Hopkins (Ray Bolger
), after 40 years, then panics and tells him she's Irene's sister; Dr. Todd Gardiner (Peter Marshall
) wrote a book about open marriage, but finds his own marriage, to Eleanor Gardiner (Barbara Rush
), in jeopardy, as he gets close to a fellow passenger (Phyllis Davis
); Doc's (Bernie Kopell
) ex-wife (Tina Louise
) arrives with a new fiancé (Lyle Waggoner
20 January 1979
Gopher's (Fred Grandy
) friend (Bobby Van
) offers him a job managing his hotel; a magician's (Michael Gregory
) assistant (Melinda Naud
) is upset when the magician sends his brother (Ron Palillo
) to replace him in the act; a woman (Nancy Walker
) moves her furniture into a ship's cabin, so she can get closer to a ship's porter (Abe Vigoda
), to whom she is attracted.
27 January 1979
A widower and his son (Robert Mandan
and Randolph Mantooth
) fall in love with the same woman (Cathy Lee Crosby
); Isaac (Ted Lange
) worries that a young woman on probation (Debbi Morgan
), working in the gift shop, has stolen some jewelry; a henpecked man (Roddy McDowall
) feels he's being pressured, by his girlfriend (Tammy Grimes
), into marriage, against his will.
3 February 1979
Julie's English teacher (Raymond Burr
), a lonely alcoholic, is aboard ship for Julie's high school class reunion.
3 February 1979
Conclusion. At their high-school reunion, Julie and her former boyfriend find they'll still attracted to each other.
10 February 1979Hans Conried
) offers Captain Stubing (Gavin MacLeod
) the command of a super-luxury liner; Doc meets his former mentor (Richard Anderson
), now a disgruntled amputee, and his wife (Diana Muldaur
); old college friends (Carol Lynley
and Donna Pescow
) are attracted to the same man (Ben Murphy
17 February 1979
A chauffeur (John Mills
) takes up with his employer (Celeste Holm); an 8-year-old blames himself when his parents (Juliet Mills
, David Hedison
) separate; Gopher has a crush on a cover model (Hayley Mills
24 February 1979
A former waitress (Maren Jensen
), who inherited a fortune, isn't sure if her boyfriend (Dennis Cole
) loves her or her money; a man (Gene Rayburn
) is interested in a woman (Fannie Flagg
) but her dog (Cricket
, a terrier) doesn't like him; Isaac (Ted Lange
) falls for a woman (Debbie Allen
), who's engaged.
3 March 1979
Two shy people (Patty Dworkin
and Zane Lasky
) keep missing each other, due in part to Gopher's (Fred Grandy
) interference; two residents of an old folks home (Minnie Pearl
and Arthur Godfrey
) take a cruise, only to be followed by their meddling children (Elinor Donahue
and Warren Berlinger
); a fortune teller (Samantha Eggar
) may be a fraud but she may be something else for the Captain (Gavin MacLeod
10 March 1979
Attracted to an older man (Paul Burke
), Julie discovers she is being pursued by a teen with a crush (Patrick Labyorteaux
); Bo and Sam (Philip Charles MacKenzie
and Michael Tucci
) break a ship model, meant for a party to celebrate Stubing's fifth year as Captain, and work to fix it in time; a couple (Ellen Bry
and Mark Shera
) try to find common ground between their parents (Leslie Nielsen
and Arlene Dahl
17 March 1979
Isaac overhears a couple (Peter Lawford
and Dana Wynter
) talking and thinks they are planning to kill Captain Stubing; a famous rock star (Sonny Bono
) meets a deaf woman (Sheila Lenham
); Doc's old friend (Jill St. John
), who is on her honeymoon, believes her new husband (Charlie Callas
) doesn't really love her.
5 May 1979
Former stowaway April Lopez (Charo
) returns, this time as a lounge singer; a woman (Anne Meara
) brings her kids on her second honeymoon, to the consternation of her husband (Jerry Stiller
); a WW II veteran (Craig Stevens
) and a USO entertainer (Cyd Charisse
) reunite, after 35 years.
12 May 1979
A widower's (Ken Berry
) second wife (Beth Howland
) tries to win the acceptance of his two teenage daughters (Michele Tobin
and Shelly Juttner
); Gopher's (Fred Grandy
) relationship with his father (Robert Cummings
) is tested when his parents come on board for a Mother's Day cruise and his father feels like a third wheel compared to Gopher and his mother (Ethel Merman
); an older woman (Nanette Fabray
), with grown children, worries what her husband (Barry Nelson
) will say when she tells him she's pregnant.
15 September 1979
The ship goes to Alaska to host the wedding of Doug Bradbury (Mark Harmon
) and Carol Bowers (Lisa Hartman
). The wedding arouses problems between the two families (Ray Milland
and Eleanor Parker
, and Lorne Greene
and Audra Lindley
). What's more, Doug's old girlfriend (Caren Kaye
) is still in love with him. Marv Prine (Don Most
) pursues Julie but she is hoping to reconnect with Jack Chenault (Tony Roberts
), the man who once asked her to marry him. And Alicia Bradbury (Eleanor Parker
) struggles to avoid the shame of her impending bankruptcy.
15 September 1979
Natalie (Caren Kaye
) tries to prevent Doug (Mark Harmon
) and Carol (Lisa Hartman
) from getting married; Buddy (Lorne Greene
) and Portia (Audra Lindley
) come to an important decision; Julie gets a surprise when she finds her lost love, Jack (Tony Roberts
); Doug and Carol's wedding is endangered by both Natalie's interference and Alicia's (Eleanor Parker
) bankruptcy. Conclusion of two parts.
22 September 1979
Julie envies her friend Tina, who gave up a career for marriage. Mike annoys his girlfriend Robin with constant talk about love's stages. A romance between seniors Nora and Phillip is disrupted by her flighty daughter and his stuffy valet.
29 September 1979
A free spirit (Arlene Golonka
) impulsively invites a cabbie (Buddy Hackett
) she just met to go with her on a cruise; a former ballet dancer (Carol Lawrence
) interjects herself into the affairs of her former partner (John Meehan
), which doesn't please his current partner (Starr Danias
); Dr. Bricker (Bernie Kopell
) becomes ill and becomes a difficult patient under the care of an attractive doctor (Susan Sullivan
), who is a cruise passenger.
6 October 1979
Uptight IRS agent Viola Penny audits Stubing, who tries to get her to loosen up. A tabloid reporter trails a female celebrity because he thinks she's meeting a secret lover. A honeymooner discovers her ex is on the ship and wants her back.
13 October 1979
A singer cancels so Julie tries to find another. Sisters who cruise together once a year are joined this time by one's husband. A widow is surprised by her florist who has been delivering a rose each day in her husband's name since he died.
20 October 1979
A shoe salesman (Don Knotts
), who strongly resembles a famous TV star, initially tries to deny it until an attractive woman (Julie Newmar
) hits on him; a woman (Jane Wyatt
), who was separated from her husband (Jean-Pierre Aumont
) in WW II, hopes to reunite with him; Isaac (Ted Lange
) decides to become a writer but can't decide on what kind of genre to write.
27 October 1979
A woman with a stepmother and two stepsisters gets a chance to shine thanks to Gopher. A sportscaster woman gets surprised by her sexist TV partner and challenges him to a contest. A man with his handicapped brother meets a beautiful woman.
3 November 1979
Two opposing members of a hung jury (Jo Ann Pflug
and Vic Tayback
) run into each other on the cruise; the Captain's (Gavin MacLeod
) estranged daughter (Jill Whelan
) runs away from her aunt (Sandra Deel
)'s home to be with Stubing; Julie (Lauren Tewes
) tries to play matchmaker for a male passenger (Louis Nye
) and a female passenger (Gale Storm
), but he (Nye) mistakenly thinks Julie is after him.
10 November 1979
The Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders
are among those on board for a charity cruise to benefit an orphanage. Show business legend Stella Logan (Ginger Rogers
) rebuffs her ex-fiancé Elliott Norman (Douglas Fairbanks Jr.
), a tough theatre critic who has written a play for her and wants her to critique it but is afraid she'll reject it, due to his past treatment of her when they broke up. Divorcing Lou and Nora Hayman (Larry Linville
and Gunilla Hutton
) plot to steal fifty thousand dollars in gems that are hidden in a lamp, which is making the rounds of the crew members. Helen Ames (Dina Merrill
) thinks that her daughter Wendy (Gaye Carter
), a Dallas Cowboys Cheerleader, is trying to steal her boyfriend Bill Kelly (William Windom
) from her. Childless bachelor Paul Turner (Bill Daily
) hires actors to portray his wife, mother, and son (Roz Kelly
, Patsy Kelly
and Jackie Earle Haley
) so that he can impress Ed Hartnett (John Hillerman
), who only hires family men for his company. A complication ensues when Paul is attracted to a cheerleader (Kim Kilway
). Cheerleader Stacy (Tami Barber
) is followed on-board by persistent suitor Mark Scott (Stephen Shortridge
), so she recruits her fellow cheerleaders to run interference for her and keep him occupied for the duration of the cruise.
10 November 1979
17 November 1979
The guys deceive Julie in elaborate fashion to plan her birthday surprise. Rich adulterer Bart uses his assistant Wally to cover for him. Olympic hopeful Penny Barrett would rather hang with a male teenager than practice in the gym.
24 November 1979
Doc's friend Lucy's boyfriend Peter fakes an illness to avoid marrying her. Stubing hopes to reunite with ex-flame Eleanor, and recruits Gopher to keep teenage lovers Terry and Monica apart and appease a cruise line VIP.
1 December 1979
A professor's assistant is in love with him but he hasn't a clue; a pro football player has to accept the fact he can't play any longer; a woman comes on board determined to marry the first man who says yes.
8 December 1979
Gopher dates passenger Claire Dalrymple, who tells him she's separated. Carol Hanson tries to pry her ex-husband Chet away from his girlfriend Kim by rooming next door. Ex-boxers Ed Taylor and Jack McTigue renew their decades-old rivalry.
15 December 1979
Bricker discovers he is still married to one of his ex-wives; a financially troubled couple find an envelope filled with cash; A boy is excited about the cruise until his teacher comes on board and romances his mother
12 January 1980
April Lopez (Charo
) comes back on board, this time with her manager and fiancé (Forrest Tucker
), a man twice her age; a bickering married couple (Don Adams
and Juliet Mills
) struggle to finish their screenplay; an adopted daughter (Laurie Walters
) wants to learn the identity of her birth father (Ross Martin
19 January 1980
Singer Danny Shoenfield, née Fields (Donny Osmond
), thinks his hillbilly relatives (Richard Paul
, Marion Ross
, Slim Pickens
and Loni Anderson
) will ruin his chances of impressing talent scout Steve Sorrell (Rich Little
), who becomes attracted to Danny's sister Kitty (Loni Anderson
). Kitty doubts her commitment to her fiancé (Randall Carver
). An author (Eve Arden
) pictures the Shoenfield family as potential characters for her next book and poses as a mountain woman to get the grandfather (Slim Pickens
) to open to her. Doc, Isaac, and Gopher's (Bernie Kopell
, Ted Lange
and Fred Grandy
) cabins get flooded, so they bunk with Stubing (Gavin McLeod
) temporarily, keep him awake at night, and annoy him incessantly. Two couples (Denise Nicholas
and Robert Guillaume
, and Pam Grier
and Richard Roundtree
) cruise together and one wife (Denise Nicholas
) tries to convince the other husband (Richard Roundtree
) that their spouses are having an affair.
19 January 1980
Conclusion. The Captain (Gavin MacLeod
) is ready to abandon ship, after sharing his cabin with Gopher, Isaac and Doc (Fred Grandy
, Ted Lange
and Bernie Kopell
); Kitty Shoenfield (Loni Anderson
) develops a relationship with Steve Sorrell (Rich Little
) and breaks her engagement to Elmer (Randall Carver
26 January 1980
Doc (Bernie Kopell
) matches a playboy (Joe Namath
) with a woman (Vicki Lawrence
) so that he can be with her sister (Misty Rowe
); Vicki (Jill Whelan
) helps a boy (Mark James
), who is trying to reunite his divorced parents (Cleavon Little
and Ja'net DuBois
); a man (Phil Harris
) recovering from heart surgery deals with an overbearing wife (Brett Somers
), who won't let him do anything that's fun.
2 February 1980
The Captain's brother comes on board and immediately starts mooching off him; Julie's widow aunt thinks she's met the reincarnation of her husband; a woman is looking for the perfect man to be the father of her child - but not her husband.
9 February 1980
After Gopher's father dies, Gopher invites his mother Roz on board the ship to cheer her up, but she seems to be too cheerful for a new widow. Waiter Paul Stockwood meets Leila Stanhope, a regular customer at his bistro, on board and lies about his identity to impress her. Asian comic Jimmy Kim's act offends Asian reporter Kendall Park, who is doing a feature article on him.
1 March 1980
A man causes a crisis of faith for an old flame who has become a nun. A woman pursues a shy astronomer, thinking he is a famous sex therapist traveling incognito. Celia Elliot's pushy mom nags her to find a rich husband.
15 March 1980
An overprotective husband (James Gregory
) thinks every man, on board, is after his wife (Jayne Meadows
); Vicki (Jill Whelan
) and a young passenger (Ronnie Scribner
) make friends with a boy (Tony Ramirez
), who's a stowaway; Julie's (Lauren Tewes
) brilliant professor friend (Shelley Hack
), a former high school friend, plays dumb to meet men, only to have the man she likes (Kevin Tighe
) reject her for not being smart enough.
29 March 1980
Gordon Layton (Noah Beery Jr.
) gets carried away trying to lavish gifts on his wife Betty (Alice Faye
), as she recovers from surgery. Captain Stubing (Gavin MacLeod
) and Vicki (Jill Whelan
) meet with a child services worker (Lois Nettleton
) to decide if he gets full custody of Vicki. A honeymoon is disrupted, when the bride's (Eve Plumb
) clingy family unnerves the groom (Sal Viscuso
5 April 1980
Vicki develops a crush on a rock star; a man in a cast from a traffic accident runs into the woman who had hit him; a man paying high alimony tries to avoid every woman he meets.
19 April 1980
Isaac finds a former school friend is trying to use him to make her husband jealous/Cathy's concern is getting in the way of committing to Tom/Fay Piermont wants to liven up her marriage.
3 May 1980
The male crew members challenge Doc to a bet after he swears off women. A widow must make a decision about her friend's mystery caller. A man falls for the young woman in his protective custody.
25 October 1980
Three Army buddies reunite with their former sergeant Harry Beluski, who talks of nothing but the Army. When they tire of listening to him reminisce about the old days, they introduce him to an attractive widow named Rose who works on the cruise line as a steward. Gopher poses as Julie's lover to fend off the unwanted advances of his abrasive former fraternity brother Rick Martin, but then a real spark appears between them. Single Gwen Hutchins romances fellow passenger Dennis Grant but fears that he won't react well when he hears that she is pregnant.
1 November 1980
On a cruise where a number of engaged couples will be married, a man (Lloyd Alan
) bails on his fiancée (Charlene Tilton
) and expects his friend, the best man (Don Most
), to break the news. The parents (Peter Graves
and Kathie Browne
) of a young engaged couple (Brian Kerwin
and Erin Moran
) try to stop their impending marriage. A contest promoter (Darren McGavin
) considers taking a bribe and his wife (Debbie Reynolds
) plans to file for divorce. Julie (Lauren Tewes
) reconnects with a man (Don Most) she met on a previous cruise to Alaska. Gopher (Fred Grandy
) is upset about having to be a judge of a contest, until he meets the other two judges (Ann Jillian
and Dawn Wells
). A couple (Ted Knight
and Rue McClanahan
), engaged for ten years, are finally getting married.
1 November 1980
Vicki (Jill Whelan
) develops a strong attachment to Mrs. Evans (Debbie Reynolds
) and sees her as a surrogate mother; Mr. McMann (Ted Knight
) is due to be married but can't say the words, "I do"; Emily's (Charlene Tilton
) estranged fiancé (Lloyd Alan
) comes back; Doc (Bernie Kopell
) sends Gopher (Fred Grandy
) on a wild goose chase to get him away from the judges (Dawn Wells
and Ann Jillian
) and he ends up in jail.
8 November 1980
Air Force Major Ross Latham (Robert Culp
), his passive wife Nara (Nobu McCarthy
) and an aggressive old girlfriend (Jo Ann Pflug
) are on the cruise, at the same time. Two brothers (Al Corley
and Mark Pinter
) share the honeymoon suite. Texas oil magnate Mason Fleers (Dale Robertson
) takes the Dallas Cowboys Cheerleaders
aboard to impress several of his clients, including Mideastern Prince Hasssan (Pat Harrington Jr.
), who thinks that one of the cheerleaders is a permanent gift for him.
15 November 1980
A woman (Lani O'Grady
) claims Julie (Lauren Tewes
) is trying to steal her fiancé (Bart Braverman
), an old college friend of Julie's; several passengers (Skip Stephenson
, Jimmie Walker
and Connie Stevens
) have come on board, after receiving free passage, only to discover there is a task they have to complete, find Mallory's (Pernell Roberts
) nephew; Mallory's wife (Gayle Hunnicutt
) is tired of her husband's boorish treatment of her and takes up with Doc (Bernie Kopell
); a man (Skip Stephenson
) is being pursued by a mysterious woman (Maren Jensen
15 November 1980
Gopher (Fred Grandy
) and the group of passengers continue to look for Mallory's (Pernell Roberts
) nephew, while being shadowed by a mysterious stranger (Sorrell Booke
); Capt. Stubing (Gavin MacLeod
) ponders a job offer from a friend (Dick Van Patten
22 November 1980
A famous movie star disguises herself as her own secretary in order to enjoy some privacy. Julie contemplates marrying a wealthy bachelor, who is entering the steeplechase. Isaac and Gopher sneak a horse on board to enter the upcoming race. Paul Willis lies to his wife about the reason for their cruise, leading her to seek company elsewhere.
29 November 1980
Two sets of parents (Terry Moore
and Troy Donahue
and Farley Granger
and Joan Lorring
) try to romantically match up their children, together. The children (Lorenzo Lamas
and Melissa Sue Anderson
) are fed up with them pushing them together, that they decide to do something about it. But, their plan blows up in their faces. A single mother (Susan Howard
) is looking for a single guy, but will only date someone whom her baby likes. And Isaac's (Ted Lange
) aunt and uncle (Isabel Sanford
and Mel Stewart
) come on board and her aunt, who fancies herself an actress, performs and Isaac asks the chew to praise her and, in doing so, she decides to pursue it, which means she will leave her husband.
6 December 1980
A kleptomaniac meets a psychiatrist who tries to help her but when they fall for each other, the psychiatrist keeps his distance. A television star comes on board and Vicki who adores him expects him to be like his character but is not. And the Captain's brother comes on the cruise to introduce the woman he is going to marry to the Captain. But a woman whom he was involved with follows and tries to woo him back to her and he finds it hard to resist her.
13 December 1980
A woman (Sue Ane Langdon
), whom Capt. Stubing (Gavin MacLeod
) knows, comes on board with her husband (Monte Markham
) but is feeling neglected, so she turns to him. A woman (Pamela Sue Martin
), who wants to keep guys from hitting on her, puts on a wedding ring. And a scientist (Tom Smothers
) thinks a woman (Helen Reddy
) is an alien and convinces Gopher (Fred Grandy
) of it and freaks out.
20 December 1980
Young stowaway Scotty (Meeno Peluce
) convinces the crew members that playboy passenger Jeff Dalton (Dirk Benedict
) is his father. Gopher (Fred Grandy
) and Isaac (Ted Lange
) have several mishaps with the parrot that Captain Stubing (Gavin MacLeod
) buys Vicki (Jill Whelan
) for a Christmas present. Father and son singers Bobby Braddock Senior and Junior (Allen Jones
and Jack Jones
), who haven't spoken to each other for years since the son began a solo career, resist their wives' (Dorothy Lamour
and Laraine Stephens
) efforts to reunite them.
3 January 1981
Carl and Violet Hooper's 40th anniversary cruise goes sour after he learns that her investments have been so successful that he could have retired from his job years earlier. Sally Walker endeavors to attract her neglectful husband Hank's attention by claiming that Doc made a pass at her during an examination. A man sneaks on the cruise because he doesn't believe that his girlfriend's travel partner is her brother; he then convinces a neighboring passenger to let him stay in her cabin by claiming to be with the CIA.
10 January 1981
A woman (Florence Henderson
), who believes she is cursed and will die prematurely, is determined to find her husband (Jeffrey Tambor
) a new mate, and he chooses a young passenger (Christina Hart
); Isaac (Ted Lange
) is afraid of running into his old high school teacher, when she (Lillian Gish
) and her grandson (Reb Brown
) come aboard; a seal (The Seal Shirley
) is jealous when her trainer ('Donald O'Connor' ) and another passenger (Georgia Engel
) get together.
17 January 1981
Vicki (Jill Whelan
) resents her father's (Gavin MacLeod
) attention to a woman passenger (Pat Crowley
); a judge (Nancy Walker
) trails a man (George Gobel
), who compulsively marries women without divorcing the other women; an expectant husband (Michael Young
) worries about his wife (Murphy Cross
), even though she isn't due for two months.
17 January 1981
A young woman falls in love without knowing that her health is in danger. April becomes a nanny to TV sportscaster Ty Younger's kids. A loan shark sends one of his men to collect a debt, but complications arise.
24 January 1981
Gopher (Fred Grandy
) is initially worried about meeting his Canadian pen pal (Marie Laurin
) but then thinks he's in love; a woman (Trish Stewart
) discovers she is supposed to share her cabin with a man (Patrick Wayne
) and, after throwing him out, he tries to find a place to stay; a man (Paul Burke
), married to a workaholic (Dana Wynter
), meets a widow (Susan Oliver
), who's willing to take his wife's place.
31 January 1981
Doc Bricker (Bernie Kopell
) is excited to see his old medical school chum (James MacKrell
), but when the old friend has to skip the trip, he asks Doc to look after his wife (Jill St. John
) and the wife is very interested in getting to know Doc better; a very ordinary-looking guy (Ron Palillo
) is actually the world's greatest lover; and a woman (Dorian Lopinto
) either has a twin or a secret past.
7 February 1981
Isaac courts a talent scout with his singing skills. A former All-American football player has a romance with Julie. Glenn Dobson's wife forces him to take the cruise in order to help him conquer his fear of water.
14 February 1981
Charo returns as April Lopez. Television sportscaster Ty Younger and his new fiancée can't leave his children and their "ninny" April behind them when they set sail. A college football player develops a crush on his friend's mother. A college friend of Gopher's tries to be one thing for the boss and another for the boss' daughter, all the while not realizing they are father and daughter.
21 February 1981
A man (Dick Martin) in the middle of a divorce traveling with his mistress is convinced his wife is spying on him; a blind woman (Leslie Uggams) fends off a would-be suitor; nudist sunbather causes problems for the crew, especially Gopher.
28 February 1981
Isaac's uncle (Demond Wilson
), who has not exactly been an upstanding guy, comes on board. And, a government agent (Robert Ginty
) tells the Captain that he is following Isaac's uncle, who he thinks is involved in something that's not exactly legal. A member of the crew (Larry Breeding
) is attracted to a passenger (Kyle Aletter
) but her mother (Lee Meriwether
, Kyle Aletter's real-life mother) is hoping that her daughter can snag a wealthy man. So, he borrows another passenger (Steve Doubet
)'s clothes and pretends to be a man of means. And a guy from Doc's hometown ('Randy Powell'), whom he helped send to medical school so that their hometown can have a doctor, comes on board to introduce Doc to his fiancée (Cindy Morgan
) and tells him that he's not going to practice in their hometown. So, Doc decides to resign and be the doctor of his hometown.
7 March 1981
Julie's (Lauren Tewes
) friend (Juliet Mills
) sails with her fiancé (Gary Conway
) only to discover her other fiancé (Pedro Armendáriz Jr.
) is also on board, as well, and has to spend the trip juggling them both; a man (Eddie Mekka
), traveling with his elderly mother (Sylvia Sidney
), has trouble re-connecting with a childhood friend (Joan Prather
), whom his mother does not approve of; Gopher (Fred Grandy
)'s personal nemesis (Joanna Pettet
), a difficult customs inspector, comes aboard and makes his life even more difficult, although she may have some redeeming qualities.
14 March 1981
A woman (Linda Cristal
), tired of her fiancé (Alejandro Rey
)'s wandering eye, makes time with Dr. Bricker (Bernie Kopell
); two men (Dack Rambo
and Ken Kercheval
), who constantly compete against each other, vie for Julie (Lauren Tewes
)'s attention; Capt. Stubing's (Gavin MacLeod
) Aunt Hilly (Olivia de Havilland
) comes aboard for a visit and decides the ship isn't the proper place for a young lady like Vicki (Jill Whelan
11 April 1981
Captain Stubing's (Gavin MacLeod
) friend (Gene Barry
) is a gambler, who becomes a bad influence on Vicki (Jill Whelan
); a man (Charles Siebert
), who lost a lot of weight, and his fiancée (Vicki Lawrence
) come aboard; old-time members of a gang (Jesse White
, Kaye Ballard
and Jack Gilford
) reunite to rob the ship's vault.
2 May 1981
On a cruise to Acapulco for a fashion show, real-life fashion designers Geoffrey Beene
, Bob Mackie
and Gloria Vanderbilt
all appear as themselves. Romantic problems plague the husband-and-wife owners (Anne Baxter
and McLean Stevenson
) of a modeling agency. A cosmetics mogul (Robert Vaughn
) seeks a unique woman to represent his new product, and finds two equally likely candidates. Julie (Lauren Tewes
) steps into the spotlight, when she substitutes for a model friend (Cristina Ferrare
), who has fallen in love. A couple (Richard Gilliland
and Debra Clinger
) frantically try to locate some designer clothes that they've misplaced, while simultaneously attempting to hide their marriage from her father (Dick Shawn
), the boss.
3 October 1981
9 May 1981
Gopher's (Fred Grandy
) aunt (Jane Powell
), who Gopher doesn't know is a maid, comes aboard with her employer (Mary Wickes
) and falls in love with a fellow passenger (Howard Keel
); a playboy (Joe Namath
) uses an old girlfriend (Karen Grassle
) in a scheme on his best friend (Fred Willard
); a baby boy is reluctantly abandoned by his father (Gary Burghoff
), who is a ship's mechanic, and finds a sympathetic listener in a passenger (Belinda Montgomery
), who is an old high school friend.
16 May 1981
Julie (Lauren Tewes
) has a run-in with a zoologist (Anthony Andrews
), who turns out to be a passenger, and they butt heads. A young actress (Alison Arngrim
) comes aboard and makes a fool out of Vicki (Jill Whelan
). An estranged husband (William Christopher
) and wife (Toni Tennille
), one of whom is a neat-freak (Christopher) and the other a slob (Tennille), find themselves not only on the ship but in the same cabin.
10 October 1981
Julie (Lauren Tewes
) prepares to marry her fiancé Tony Selkirk (Anthony Andrews
) during a stopover in Sydney, Australia. She asks Vicki (Jill Whelan
) to be her bridesmaid; Doc (Bernie Kopell
), Gopher (Fred Grandy
) and Isaac (Ted Lange
) to be her ushers; and Captain Stubing (Gavin MacLeod
) to give her away. Award-winning anthropologist Milo Endler (Harry Morgan
) and Vivian (Katherine Helmond
), his wife of fifteen years, are on their way to a dig in the South Pacific. Milo's disgraced colleague Deke Donner (José Ferrer
) once embezzled a university's money to bet on the horses at the racetrack. In the South Pacific, Deke plans to present Milo with what could be the find of the century: a Mongala (Patrick Ward
), a missing evolutionary link between animals and humans. But Milo is so busy with his work that he neglects frustrated Vivian, who takes a liking to Captain Stubing. New Zealand rancher Ralph Sutton (Patrick Duffy
) has a secret that he won't share with English teacher and fellow passenger Barbara Carroll (Michelle Phillips
), while young beauty Connie Wilker (Jenilee Harrison
) has eyes for him. Gopher and Doc both compete for the affections of new cruise director Yvonne Petty (Delvene Delaney
10 October 1981
Vicki (Jill Whelan
) models the bridesmaid's gown she plans to wear for Julie's (Lauren Tewes') wedding, while Isaac (Ted Lange
) finds a flaw in the wedding gift that he bought on the crew's behalf. Barbara (Michelle Phillips
) feels jealous of Connie (Jenilee Harrison
) and Ralph's (Patrick Duffy') relationship and sends him a love letter, which Connie intercepts. Having been captured by Deke (José Ferrer
) and Milo (Harry Morgan
), the Mongala (Patrick Ward
) is caged below in the hull of the ship. When Milo finds out some new information about the Mongala, Vivian (Katherine Helmond
) issues an ultimatum. Gopher (Fred Grandy
) and Doc (Bernie Kopell
) continue their pursuit of Julie's replacement, Yvonne (Delvene Delaney
). While the crew members are in Sydney for the wedding, Julie and Tony give them a tour of the Rossmore Animal Preserve, where Tony is on staff.
17 October 1981
The Virgin Islands serve as a backdrop for the Grand Prix Wine-Tasting Competition, whose winner receives a $25,000 prize. Judge Alan Curtis starts a shipboard fling with Marion Blake, without getting to know her well. Julie's Aunt Sylvia Duvall is on the cruise with her friend Betsy Boucher. Their scheme is for Betsy to meet the wine competition's sponsor Elliott Banning, marry him, and become a wealthy bride. But their efforts may be in jeopardy due to Sylvia's well-intentioned bumbling. Also among the judges is snobbish judge Vincent Van Durling, who seems like a front-runner for the grand prize. Annie and Kevin Butler obtain a quickie divorce each year because filing their income tax as a married couple puts them in a higher tax bracket. This is their sixth planned divorce, and this time her impulsive high school classmate Jeff Thatcher is on board as one of the judges in the wine competition. Vicki impatiently waits to receive an autographed photo of Los Angeles Rams quarterback Pat Haden after requesting it through the mail.
24 October 1981
A guy (Brian Kerwin
) whom Julie (Lauren Tewes
) booked to entertain the passengers, is a male stripper. He's also a teacher and runs into the head of the PTA (Christopher Norris
)) and tries to keep her from seeing him perform. A guy (Flip Wilson
), whose wife (Marla Gibbs
) just divorced him, comes on board and is suicidal. Isaac (Ted Lange
) tries to help by calling his wife but she refuses to talk to him. So Isaac tries to set him up with some girls but then his ex-wife shows up. And the Captain (Gavin MacLeod
) recognizes one of the passengers as a known jewel thief (Michael Zaslow
). And when another passenger's (Henny Backus
) diamond pendant is stolen, the Captain suspects him.
31 October 1981
Gopher (Fred Grandy
) finds some money and fantasizes how he'll spend it; a folk singer (Florence Henderson
) meets an old friend (James Noble
), who's now a politician and traveling with a female companion (Carol Lawrence
); a father (Mason Adams
) and daughter (Randi Oakes
) come aboard and she meets a veterinarian (Frank Bonner
7 November 1981
The head chef (Jay Johnson
) is jealous of a new rival chef (Leslie Easterbrook
) in the kitchen; a bumbling detective (Bernie Kopell
in a dual role) is assigned to protect a client's (Trisha Noble
) jewels; two friends (Joan Fontaine
and Richard Basehart
14 November 1981
An earthy woman (Nancy Dussault
) comes between a socialite (Marti Stevens
) and her escort (Cesare Danova
); psychic researchers (Juliet Mills
and Buddy Hackett
) search for a ghost aboard the ship; Vicki (Jill Whelan
) meets an older boy (Patrick Labyorteaux
) traveling alone.
21 November 1981
The crew is in Australia to work on one of the cruise line's ships based there. And a wealthy man named Fransworth (Lloyd Bridges
) has decided to invite his whole family for a reunion. But, in actuality, he wants to see who, among them, he should keep in his will. And among them is his niece, Marcia (Jessica Walters
), who is not exactly fond of him, because she believes that, because of him, her father became penniless. And she brings along a friend, Jessica (Linda Evans
), who has a knack of getting wealthy men to marry her, for the purpose of getting him to marry her, so that she could get what Marcia thinks she deserves. And he asks his niece, Jenny (Morgan Fairchild
), and her husband, Bud (Grant Goodeve
), to come but they're divorced so they have to pretend that they're still married. But when her boyfriend (Alan Fletcher
) calls, he comes aboard and refuses to leave and, when he's told there are no more cabins, he stays with them. And Farnsworth's secretary and niece, Eloise (Beth Howland
), gets him a replacement valet, Wayne (Jim Nabors
), who's not exactly what he's use to. And Wayne and Eloise get close. Gopher (Fred Grandy
) thinks he might be related to Farnswoth and could be entitled to his fortune. Stubbing (Gavin MacLeod
) meets an old flame's daughter, Melanie (Margaret Laurence
). And when he has to go, she decides to join him and he keeps his distance because he can't seem to separate her from her late mother. And Julie (Lauren Tewes
) can't help but think about Tony Selkirk (Anthony Andrews
), the guy she nearly married but he chose not to get married because he was dying.
21 November 1981
28 November 1981
A couple (Jerry Stiller
and Anne Meara
) plan to renew their marriage vows aboard the ship; a tooth filling interferes with Isaac's (Ted Lange
) romantic pursuits with his girlfriend (Berlinda Tolbert
) and he also has a rival from a male passenger (Darrow Igus
); two sisters (Audra Lindley
and Marion Ross
) take the cruise together and one sister (Lindley) develops a relationship with another passenger (Bernard Fox
5 December 1981
Two stowaways (Milton Berle
and Martha Raye
) pretend to be another couple and they start charging things, not knowing that the crew members, who approve of the charges, will have to pay for items they charge but don't pay for. A woman (Susan Richardson
) meets the author (Daryl Anderson
) of a book she's reading. And Doc's (Bernie Kopell
) brother (Jack Bannon
) and sister-in-law (Elaine Joyce
) come aboard and his brother has a lot of pent-up resentment against him.
12 December 1981
Vicki (Jill Whelan
) feels unneeded on the ship and begs Captain Stubing (Gavin MacLeod
) to give her a job, so he "hires" her as his personal secretary. But she gets carried away with enthusiasm and prompts the crew to make her workload a little less enjoyable. Three members (Rose Marie
, Jan Clayton
and Lucille Benson
) of a floating bridge game get annoyed when their new fourth member, Shirley Simpson (Nanette Fabray
), meets dentist Frank Leonhardt (Robert Alda
) on the cruise and decides she would rather get to know him better than play bridge. Emotionally cold Linda Trent (Carlene Watkins
) turns down all possible male suitors in no uncertain terms. So fellow passenger Barry Styles (Jim Stafford
) introduces himself and tries to win her over by feigning disinterest and claiming to have taken a vow of celibacy.
2 January 1982
Doc arrives back from holidays and introduces his new wife of a couple of hours to the crew. Don Adams is a Safety Investigator on holidays but finds danger around every corner on board the ship. The president of a financial group comes aboard to talk his female VP out of resigning due to untrue rumors about them having an affair.
9 January 1982
Two passengers (Arlene Golonka
and Sonny Shroyer
) meet during the boarding and although attracted to one another, they find they live at the same address and the lady has a rule about dating someone who lives in her own apartment building. The Captain (Gavin MacLeod
) is to greet a famous female artist (Lee Meriwether
) aboard, who has been commissioned by the ship line to paint his portrait. A romance begins and the artist decides to paint an unconventional portrait of the captain, naked, and from memory. When a couple (Mary Beth McDonough
and Dean Butler
) on their honeymoon come aboard, an older passenger (Henry Jones
) vaguely recognizes the younger man's face, but can't recall where he knows him from. The young honeymooner knows exactly where they first met, but denies knowing the older man.