The Opening of Misty Beethoven (1976)

User Rating:

7.6/10   

Director:

Radley Metzger

Writer:

Jake Barnes (screenplay)

Genre:

Adult | Comedy | Romance

Plot:

Pornography meets Pygmalion. Misty, the hooker, meets the sexologist who thinks he can transform her...

Plot Keywords:

Foursome | Naked Woman | Erection | Sexual Humor | Nude Man

Awards:

5 wins

Cast

Constance Money	...	Dolores 'Misty' Beethoven
Jamie Gillis	...	Dr. Seymour Love
Jacqueline Beudant	...	Geraldine Rich
Terri Hall	...	Tanya
Ras Kean	...	Lawrence Lehman (as Ras King)
Gloria Leonard	...	Barbara
Calvin Culver	...	Impotent Art Dealer (as Casey Donovan)
Mary Stuart	...	Flight Attendant with Cigar
Jenny Baxter	...	Flight Attendant (as Janet Baldwin)
Cynthia Gardner
Helene Simone
Marlene Willoughby	...	Final Maid (as Marlene Parker)

Also Known As:

Misty Beethoven (USA) (promotional abbreviation)
Society (USA) (working title)

Runtime:

85 min | Italy:90 min | Sweden:90 min

Country:

USA

Language:

English

Color:

Color

Aspect Ratio:

1.66 : 1

Sound Mix:

Mono

Certification:

UK:18 | UK:R | UK:R18 (DVD) | USA:X | Australia:X | UK:(Banned)

Filming Locations:

New York City, New York, USA

Company:

Crescent Films

Quotes:

Seymour Love: What's your name?
Misty Beethoven: Misty Beethoven.
Seymour Love: Is that your real name?
Misty Beethoven: No, it's not. I took to sound more important.
Seymour Love: What was it before?
Misty Beethoven: Dolores Beethoven.
Seymour Love: I should have guessed.

Movie Connections:

Featured in A Night for Legends: First Annual XRCO Adult Film Awards (1985) (V)

Blue Movie Gold

Here it is, the Holy Grail of adult cinema, the finest porn film ever made both by critical consensus as from a fan's point of view. Director Radley Metzger of course had a solid background in mainstream movie-making with tasteful titillation along the lines of CAMILLE 2000 and THERESE AND ISABELLE to his credit before taking the plunge into explicit territory with a mere five high class productions. SCORE and THE PUNISHMENT OF ANNE, both of which contain a little bit of hardcore footage, don't really count as they're borderline cases.

THE OPENING OF MISTY BEETHOVEN rests proudly in the middle of this fabulous five-some, following THE PRIVATE AFTERNOONS OF PAMELA MANN and NAKED CAME THE STRANGER yet preceding BARBARA BROADCAST and MARASCHINO CHERRY. It has charm, style, wit and grace, qualities not usually associated with pornography. Every aspect of production has been handled with the utmost care, from its sumptuous cinematography (as good as any seen in big studio movies from the same period) to its lively soundtrack by rock group Elephant's Memory. Unlike other well-produced adult fare though, this one also has all the scorching sex to cement its legendary reputation for generations to come. This is the kind of adult film that should sway even the most ardent of naysayers, unless the very thought of explicit eroticism repels them. It was made by and for intelligent people who can also appreciate a good dirty joke.

Borrowing its plot from Shaw's PYGMALION, MISTY finds noted sexologist Dr Seymour Love (porn's bad boy Jamie Gillis cast against type and delivering a career performance) cruising the streets of Paris and running into a coarse streetwalker by name of Misty – formerly Dolores – Beethoven, played to perfection by the all too rarely seen Constance Money who made only a handful of flicks. Never one to resist a challenge and fired up because of a wager with fellow jet-setter Geraldine (one time performer Jaqueline Beudant), Seymour invites the girl to come along to his mansion in the States where he will groom her to become the next Goldenrod Girl of naughty magazine publishing tycoon Lawrence Lehman (handsome Ras Kean, star of Armand Weston's brilliant EXPOSE ME, LOVELY), a title only bestowed on women who're revered the world over for their exceptional beauty, sensuality and lovemaking skills. On a crash course, Misty's put through her sexual paces, gaining insight and technique as she's presented with a number of "difficult" cases for seduction. All the while, she is falling in love with her mentor who doesn't (or pretends not to) notice… It is absolutely impossible to overpraise this film. While other adult movies made since may eclipse it in certain areas, there has yet to be made another one that surpasses it in all aspects. The sheer brilliance of the leads is ably supported by a cast filled to the brim with fan favorites, most of whom deliver equally fine performances vertically as well as horizontally. Terri Hall (the leading lady from Gerard Damiano's STORY OF JOANNA) shines as ballerina Tanya who does a sweltering Sapphic number on beautiful Beudant. Gay porn icon Casey Donovan (BOYS IN THE SAND) plays the effeminate gallery owner who finds himself at Misty's mercy and later supplied the buttocks for the Ras Kean rectal excavation portion of a three-way involving Misty and Gloria Leonard, the latter then at the start of what was to become a most distinguished career in the adult field. Mary Stuart (who had played the lead in Shaun Costello's extraordinary THE PASSIONS OF CAROL) and Jenny Baxter (from Costello's TRAVAILS OF JUNE) are stewardesses on a most peculiar airline in a sequence characteristic of the type of off the wall humor Metzger excelled at.

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