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Ape
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Reviews & Ratings for
Ape More at IMDbPro »

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23 out of 27 people found the following review useful:

This movie hates you.

1/10
Author: D.A. Kellough (dkellough@columbus.rr.com) from Columbus, OH
16 March 2003

This movie hates you. No two ways about it. It wants to hurt you for seeing it.

Characters in this movie speak in a stream of continual profanities, fire flaming arrows and guns at the audience (while smiling), and the gorilla throws rocks at you and flips you the bird.

The acting is mostly abominable. The effects are worse. Nothing makes much sense. The editing is choppy. The shots are poorly composed. The locations are grey, barren, and aggressively ugly. Stock footage is piled on and looped.

Boring filler is shoved in wherever it will fit to pad out the slight story to 90 minutes. Then, it takes forever to finally end. (More punishment for you, the viewer.) Oh, and it's nominally in 3-D too.

A hateful, hateful movie.

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13 out of 14 people found the following review useful:

You have to see it to belive it.

1/10
Author: Ducktopolis from Northridge, California
18 November 2001

This movie is so terrible, yet so funny. There are so many flaws with this movie. Many parts of the movie have nothing to do with the plot. The ape one time wears shoes, flicks the camera(and its no accident, he holds it for 4 seconds), and seems to be different sized throughout the movie. You cannot make a worse movie. Period. This movie must be seen, it is too funny to explain.

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10 out of 11 people found the following review useful:

Not great even for a 'bad' film

3/10
Author: thecat72 (thecat72@yahoo.com) from NYC
18 November 2000

Nowhere near as good as "Mighty Peking Man" as far as King Kong rip-offs, "Ape" is good to look at just to see the fair miniatures and little else. The best "bad" hilarious movies are those that never intended to be that; in "Ape", the Ape gets mad gives the finger in one scene, obviously in a deliberate attempt for laughs, which in turn, makes it pretty unfunny.

The sound effects are BAD, there's a decent 'bad' fight with a giant shark which couldn't look much more fake if they tried, plus the Ape trashes a few buildings. If you are a giant monster film fan, this probably won't get more than a few viewings in your entire lifetime but it's good to watch and take off your list of films to see, plus to examine how badly this one was made. All in all, some fun, but pretty bad.

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7 out of 7 people found the following review useful:

Too hilarious for words!!!

Author: Jenova Synthesis from On Monster Island
22 February 1999

Were they (moviemakers of this cheese flick) serious when they make this Korean/American co-pro movie? Let's see, army stock footage from "Yongary" and other Korean Kaiju films(?),Toy boats and a rubber shark and many more larks are seen in this kaiju eiga. I was laughing so hard that I finally ran out of breath when the movie was over!

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7 out of 8 people found the following review useful:

I wanted to like it.

1/10
Author: lstallings from Orlando, Fl
19 November 2001

Okay, going into this film, I knew it had a reputation as one of the worst films of all time. But I like good, ole cheesy monster movies. In fact, if it had a first run presentation in the 1970's, I'm very surprised I missed it then. Anyway, I finally caught up with it. And, guess what? It IS one of the worst movies I've ever seen. Usually, something stands out: effective acting, great miniatures or special effects, nifty dialogue, music, scenery, or just a general feeling of fun. This has almost nothing. Admittedly, Joanna Kerns does give a spirited performance, and you can see a glimmer of the solid comedic style she developed later. But, that's it. Even the monster is bad. Not laughingly bad, which is sometimes enjoyable... just bad, with unexplainable movements and no expression. If someone suggests you watch this movie, just say NO.

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5 out of 5 people found the following review useful:

King Kong's Korean kousin flips off Army

2/10
Author: huemannus from United States
8 July 2007

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

It's the same old story. King Kong's Korean kousin takes time off from stomping toy houses and wrestling rubber sharks and snakes to abduct a scantily clad starlet on a movie set. His intentions are totally misunderstood when he carts her away to his mountain hideaway. However, her screams soon turn to, "be gentle with me, big guy", and another giant ape and hot babe romance is born.

Her honeymoon with the big guy is soon broken up by jealous boyfriend, who steals her back, only to hear, "there was something oddly appealing about the way he held me". Can puny human boyfriend ever compete with a 36 foot ape's appealing grip?

Saddened by the loss of his girl, KKKk takes a hike to Seoul, Korea to see if he can get her back. Not one for polite inquiry, his peeping tom act and rude rooftop razing finally yields his prize blond babe and once again she gets to enjoy an appealing hairy paw ride. The local army brass takes issue with his ill manners, unleashing its most potent weapon, interminable phone conversations designed to bore everyone to death.

In the final battle royale, toy tanks fire their bottle rockets and a squad of infantry bravely charges forward, brandishing their rifle muzzles at the sensitive big guy, who responds with volleys of Styrofoam boulders hurled down sagging wires to smash and somehow blow up toy tanks with lethal 3-D efficiency.

Wrapping it up, the misunderstood big guy succumbs to a hail of fireworks and his babe goes on to make a movie in which she uses him for a rug.

Movie highlights: In the midst of fierce battle our nubby carpeted giant ape takes the time to smugly flip off a tormenting helicopter that crashes into a cliff.

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5 out of 5 people found the following review useful:

The Shark

2/10
Author: lefrelonvert from Paris, France
24 August 2005

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

Mind you the "rubber shark" many reviewers mention isn't rubber at all...It's real! Only it's...obviously dead. A dead baby shark they must have bought at the local Korean fish market or something. Watching an extra, in a fake-looking ape suit, pretending to wrestle with a dead baby shark pretty much sums up the production values in this film.

See it so you can't believe it!

The movie's American ads actually stated "not to be confused with King Kong", but in some countries it was released as "The return King Kong". What also cracked me up was that the ape has apparently no vocal cords of any sort : he does not make a sound during the whole movie! The credits also thank the US military for their cooperation. How come all the tanks, etc, look like toys? Is this actually anti-American propaganda, aiming to pretend that the US have the crappiest army ever seen? Mind-numbing.

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6 out of 7 people found the following review useful:

King-size King Kong rip-off

1/10
Author: Mark_D-2
25 September 1999

When "King Kong" was being remade in the mid-70's, a Korean company decided to cash in on the remake and produce their own version, in 3-D yet!!! Yeah, that'll show DiLaurentiis a thing or two. As bad as the Kong remake is, "A*P*E" is considerably worse. He's just another man in a monkey suit smashing cardboard sets and doing battle with a toy-tank army while clutching the pretty blonde heroine (Joanna Karns of "Growing Pains", then going by the name Joanna De Varona, and who can blame her for changing her name after this one). There is an embarrassment of riches here, but my favorite is where the army is shooting missiles at the big monkey, and he (and I am not making this up) GIVES THEM ALL THE FINGER!!!!! After having endured an hour and a half of this turkey, I leaned toward that sentiment myself.

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12 out of 19 people found the following review useful:

This can't be serious!

1/10
Author: Scott (scott.m.hathaway@gmail.com) from Greensboro, N.C.
4 January 2002

The first time I watched this, I was so tired at the time, nothing made sense. This movie was no exception. I didn't even get the chance to finish it, I guess I just fell asleep. Well, I watched it again last night and it STILL doesn't make sense! None at all! It's just far too badly done. There are too many mistakes to list, so i won't even attempt to, all I want to know is if the film makers were serious when they made this movie. Because if they were, I pity them. I could make a better movie and look at me. I'm only 16! Ayy yay yay yay!

One out of many things that really bothered me in this movie was the monster. Now, I got over the whole fact that it is blatantly a man in a monkey suit, but some of the things that stuck around and I couldn't get out of my head were the fact that:

1.) The Ape flipped off the camera! What? Last time I checked, Apes don't intentionally flip off cameras or anybody else for that matter.

2.) At one point when the Ape was stomping a village by a mountain, the Ape was wearing high top tennis shoes. Tennis shoes!!!! No, I'm sorry Mr. Film director, Apes don't wear tennis shoes. Please, if you are going to make a movie, and it involves the portrayal of a wild animal with a human in an animal suit, remember, wild animals don't wear clothing. That's just a little fact of life of which everyone needs to be aware.

This was a terrible movie. But not too terrible in a bad way. It was more terrible in a good, funny way. It was fun to watch, it was easy to make fun of, it was an experience to remember. Movies cannot be made this bad on purpose, they are accidents. Terrible terrible accidents. Accidents like 3-Mile Island or the Jimmy Carter election. They are accidents that should have been prevented through careful evaluation of all people claiming to be film makers. Please, if you ever hear of a movie like this ever being made again, take a bat and start beating in the head of the director. Then take a lighter and some gasoline, and burn down the studio. Then go get a paper shredder and shred the film. Then take the remaining shreds and toss them into the fire at the movie studio. Nothing this bad should ever exist again. Good Day.

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4 out of 4 people found the following review useful:

Funniest movie I have ever seen

10/10
Author: Rita Manosalva C from Detroit, Michigan
7 September 2005

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

A 36-Foot ape (worst monkey custom I have seen) that escapes from a rather small toy ship, beats a shark similar in size, enters South Korea and terrorizes the population. Destroying everything at its path, including cities made of card board and Styrofoam. He kidnaps and falls in love with an American actress filming a movie, destroys helicopters, throws Styrofoam rocks to tanks, and jumps over a cow action figure. This is a love it or hate it type of movie. For collectors of this kind of films or for anyone that wants a good laugh, this is a jewel. This look as if it was done by Ed Woods. I conclude saying them that I recommend this movie so that you are witness that the American cinema can be very funny... without intending it!

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