On stage, guest star Rita Moreno battles several Muppets including Animal who backs on drums in her closing number "Fever". Backstage, Fozzie answers a string of rather unusual (and very funny) phone calls.
A young kid named Scooter applies for a job as a gofer. When, Kermit tells him he looks nothing like a gopher, Scooter explains that he'll go-fer coffee and sandwiches among other things he'll go-fer. Kermit says he doesn't have the money pay him, but then Scooter lets in that his uncle owns the theater.
The Muppet Theater is plagued by pig-related problems with The Bouncing Borcellino Brothers flubbing their opening act and Miss Piggy throwing herself at an uninterested Kermit, then later gets jealous at guest star Florence Henderson who she thinks is gonna steal her frog away.
When he's unable to get a spot on the show, Gonzo asks Scooter to be his manager. Scooter thinks Gonzo should do a rock act by banging a large rock with a mallet. Later, Gonzo tries female impersonation in a dress and a blonde wig. But Scooter gives up managing when Gonzo eats his contract.
Kermit begins to worry that guest star Harvey Korman isn't having a great time because he complains of being the "token person" on the show with all the dogs, frogs, pigs and chickens as well as the fear of hoof-and-mouth disease. So the rest of the Muppets come up with a solution: dress Harvey in a chicken suit.
Kermit cancels Miss Piggy's song for fear of overshadowing guest star Lena Horne. At least that's Piggy thinks, until finds out the real reason for being cut: he didn't want her to look foolish following Lena. Sometimes, the truth can hurt and not just for Piggy...Kermit, too.
In an effort to make Kermit jealous, Miss Piggy instructs Scooter to tell him that guest star Avery Schreiber is smitten with her. But when Kermit finds out it was all a trick, Piggy karate-chops everybody in her path.
Fozzie gets stuck in a trick cabinet owned by Marvel the Magician (who is in Toledo) and is left perform his act while in and have two pig stagehands tip the box over so Fozzie can take a bow. In the end, Fozzie escapes thanks to Crazy Harry who is having a good time setting off other explosions.
Impressed with guest star Valerie Harper's beauty, Statler and Waldorf argue over who will go backstage to meet her so they decide to flip for her. Statler wins and sets off to woo her with an African berry bush...which George the Janitor accidentally waters left to grow at a very fast rate.
Kermit is skeptical when everyone backstage is terrorized by "the Phantom of the Muppet Show." aka Uncle Deadly, a monster-actor who performed in the theater years ago, got panned by the critics, and vowed never to perform there again, and not to let anyone else perform either warning the Muppets "Leave or be doomed!"