Inspired by the American pantomime duo Shields and Yarnell, Fozzie Bear works on a mime act, including "Bear walking against the wind". Kermit suggests that Fozzie find a more original act, so Fozzie tries out "Bear feeding spaghetti to an elephant" and "Bear going to a drive-in movie with a porcupine".
Gonzo the Great receives an offer from a film studio in Bombay, and makes plans to quit the show. Miss Piggy, feeling jealous, asks Gonzo to keep her in mind when he talks to the producers. While singing "I Did It My Way" before he leaves, Gonzo breaks down in tears. The film deal falls through when the producers thought that they were hiring Gonzo the Mediocre, but when Gonzo returns to the theatre, he has to face his replacement, Trevor the Gross.
Miss Piggy asks Andy Williams to sing "Love Story" for her and Kermit, who have just become engaged. Unfortunately, Kermit hasn't heard about the engagement yet. The rumor slips out, and soon everyone thinks Kermit and Piggy are getting married. Meanwhile, the backstage cast puts up with a group of cheese hanging around backstage and trying to avoid the rats.
Statler and Waldorf rate the show like Olympic judges. First, they give Kermit a two. Then, they give the opening a three, but the audience demands they bring it down to a zero. All of the Muppets get low scores (though Fozzie's "One" is a compliment by them), and Gonzo even gets a six. The Muppets think it's just a tough audience, but Diana Ross gets tens every time which gives her high scores.