Rancho Deluxe (1975)
Curt: [referring to Beige] Poor bastard is so old he creaks like "The Inner Sanctum!"
Mr. Colson: I've seen more of this state's poor cowboys, miners, railroaders and Indians go broke buyin' pickup trucks. The poor people of this state are dope fiends for pickup trucks. As soon's they get ten cents ahead they trade in on a new pickup truck. The families, homesteads, schools, hospitals and happiness of Montana have been sold down the river to buy pickup trucks!... And there's a sickness here worse than alcohol and dope. It is the pickup truck debt! And there's no cure in sight.
Henry Beige: [digging a bullet out of a dead steer] If I wasn't so dad-blamed old, I wouldn't know what this is.
John Brown: What is it?
Henry Beige: It's a fifty-caliber bullet!
John Brown: From what kind of gun?
Henry Beige: A Sharps buffalo rifle! This is gettin' downright romantic!
John Brown: [Clearing his throat at the dinner table] Have you always been a stock detective, Mr. Beige?
Henry Beige: No.
John Brown: What did you do before that?
Henry Beige: I was a horse thief.
Wilbur Fargo: [throwing open the doors to Jack and Cecil's place] Come in, Grandma, and see the floozies and the whore-mongers! Filth and evil are one subject I am slow to tolerate!
Jack McKee: Uh, that's two subjects.
Wilbur Fargo: You are in a dangerous country, boy...
[Jack fires a bullet into the wall above Wilbur's head]
Henry Beige: Here's my bill. You can pay it, or use it to wipe the pablum off your chin.
John Brown: I'll pay it.
Henry Beige: Don't make me no never mind; I'm just in this for the sport.
Henry Beige: I'm gonna give you a rule of thumb. You foller it and you just might hold on to this ranch of yours. All large-scale crime is an inside job. Takin' fingerprints and sendin' trash off to the lab just don't ger her done. If you're dealin' with people, you gotta be human.
Laura Beige: C'mon Henry, let's blow this pop stand. I wanna get to Great Falls and spend my cut.
John Brown: When was the last time you saw a Negro in Livingstone?
Policeman: [after giving it some thought] On the one-fifteen from Billings. It was a redcap.
John Brown: Are you sure it wasn't Al Jolson?
Cora Brown: [Gyrating sensually to music] Anybody feel like dancing?
Cora Brown: [to Curt] How 'bout you, showboat?
Curt: [Despite her attractiveness, her husband is in the room] Music's a little hard to dance to.
Cora Brown: I want to see some smoldering glances down at the old corral.
[sighing with frustration]
Cora Brown: Com'on, Goddamn it! I want Gothic ranch action around here! I want some desire under the elms!
Cecil Colson: [Reacting to the strong marijuana they are smoking] That is dyno-supreme!
Mary Fargo: Mmmm! I am loaded!
Mary Fargo: Stony weed, I tell you!
Wilbur Fargo: [after catching Jack and Cecil in bed with his daughters] Good and evil is one subject I'm slow to tolerate.
Jack McKee: That's two subjects.
Jack McKee: Cecil?
Cecil Colson: Huh?
Jack McKee: Have you ever watched chickens fucking?
Cecil Colson: I wouldn't say "watched."
Jack McKee: Have you ever listened?