Columbo: I'll tell you how you did it if you're interested.
Columbo: [rummaging through his bag for evidence] Just, uh, bear with me, sir.
[he pulls out a saran-wrapped lump of something]
Columbo: Uh, that's my lunch. That doesn't mean nothing.
Columbo: [on the phone] Hello? What're you doing up? You know what time it is? It's... um...
Columbo: [calls out] DOES ANYBODY HAVE THE TIME?
Voice from other room: It's 6:30
Columbo: [into the phone] It's 6:30. I'm not yelling.
Columbo: It could only be you. By your own admission, it had to be you. Mr. Stafford was last seen around 7:30, wearing his business clothes. Now, he's alone in the building, the building is locked, and the next morning, he's found dead in his gym clothes and at 9:00 the previous evening, nine hours before the body was found, you, and you alone, knew that he was in his gym clothes. You said so. You swore to it in front of five witnesses. How did you know he was in his gym clothes, if you didn't change the clothes? You try to contrive a perfect alibi, sir, and it's your perfect alibi that's gonna hang you.
Gene: I didn't spend eighteen years as corporate controller for nothing, and I can smell film-flam right down to the paper clips you make me buy.
Milo: What the hell gives you the right, Columbo?
Columbo: This, sir. This is a warrant. This gives me the right.
Jessica Conroy: [after Milo leans in to kiss her... and she enjoys it] You know, there's one thing that bothers me about you.
Milo: What's that?
Jessica Conroy: You're a little unsure of yourself.
Milo: I'm very unsure. But I'm encouraged by your response.
Columbo: [on the phone with his wife] I'm gonna hang up. You can keep talkin' but I'm gonna hang up.
Columbo: I stopped by your place. Your housekeeper told me you were down here swimming.
Milo: Twenty minutes a day. You ought to try it, Columbo.
Columbo: No, I'm afraid not, sir. I can't swim. I don't even like a deep tub.
Milo: My markup is very small. But I have to maintain quality. That's what gives me control.
Milo: He won't find anything, and in eight months I'm going to be in my villa overlooking the Adriatic with two million in Swiss francs to keep me warm.
Columbo: [early in the morning after arriving at the crime scene with a thermos full of coffee] You know, before coffee, I'm up, I'm walking around, but I'm not awake.
Milo: Buddy is as honest as I am.
[vouching for employee with a criminal record of fraud attempting to cover up the murder he committed]
Milo: [Ruth, angry that Milo has made a pass at her, starts to leave the restaurant] Where you going?
Ruth Stafford: Out!
[She throws a glass of wine in Milo's face]
Columbo: Can I ask you a personal question? You don't have to answer.
Buddy Castle: Listen, if I had any scruples, do you think I'd be in this racket?
Milo: Every cent I make I reinvest into the company. When I make money, you make money.