Quotes
Lucy van Pelt: I've just compiled the results of my poll. You'll never get elected, Charlie Brown. You have no way of winning. No way.
Share thisSchroeder: The candidate I am presenting to the committee for the nomination for student body president possesses the same unique qualities as those possessed by Beethoven, the greatest of all composers. That wonderful pianist, and tower of strength. Linus is sort of like that, too.
Share thisLucy van Pelt: If you knew that Linus Van Pelt was running for president, would you vote for him?
Russell: No.
Lucy van Pelt: If you knew that he was going to straighten out the whole educational system, would you vote for him?
Russell: No.
Lucy van Pelt: If you knew that he was going to solve all of the problems of the whole world, would you vote for him?
Russell: No.
Lucy van Pelt: Well, why not?
Russell: 'Cause I'm the one who'd be running against him.
Share thisLinus van Pelt: If I'm elected school body president, I will purge the kingdom! My administration will free us from our spiritual Babylon! Under my andministration, I will rid the school of all false idols in high places!
Schroeder: I wonder why the principal looks so pale?
Share thisLinus van Pelt: In my administration, children will be children, and adults will be adults!
Share thisSally Brown: Well, I hope you told him off.
Linus van Pelt: Actually, no. As a matter of fact, he told me.
Sally Brown: He sold out! We elected him, and he sold out! They're all the same! Promises, promises! You elect them, and they weasel out of their promises!
Share thisLinus van Pelt: If I'm elected, my first act as president will be to appear before the School Board.
[Lucy whispers in his ear]
Linus van Pelt: I'm sorry. I will not be able to appear before the School Board. They meet at 8:00, and I go to bed at 7:30.
Share thisLucy van Pelt: Hello. You're on the air.
Caller: I am a first time caller, but a long time listener. I want to know what the candidate plans to do about the rivers.
Lucy van Pelt: Rivers? There aren't any rivers in our school!
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