Klinger tries to bribe Colonel Potter, but Potter is more concerned with the disappearance of his horse, Sophie. Meanwhile, Hawkeye and B.J. try to hide a man who is about to be drafted into the Korean army.
The arrival of fresh-faced lecturer Capt. Simmons and his subsequent performance in ER turns Winchester into a drunk, Potter into an invalid, and BJ into a bookworm. Meanwhile, Klinger begins acting like he's back home in Toledo.
Margaret celebrates her newly obtained divorce by creating a new way to handle triage and invites a general to observe. Radar is enamored of a new nurse and tries everything he knows to get her attention.
The 4077 receives a patient who is a bumbler at the front but regular gourmet in the mess tent. The surgical staff try and convince Potter to keep him but he flatly refuses. He has enough trouble as it is, his marriage is in danger.
The senior staff's attempt to help a nurse enter medical school to become a doctor is complicated by her unwanted romantic advances towards Father Mulcahy. Only Charles is unaffected by a drought and water shortage.
When soldier needs a valve replacement or else he could be paralyzed. And when another soldier is brain dead but still alive, they have to decide if they should remove his valve to save the other and they only have 20 minutes to decide.
Resigned to staying for his term of service, Klinger writes home about his job, which includes appeasing the officers' eccentricities. A home-bound patient says goodbye to the slow-witted buddy who saved his life in battle.
During a lull in casualties, friction occurs when Charles and B.J. try to write an article for a prestigious journal on a procedure they'd performed. Margaret discovers more about herself through a visit from Scully.