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Pretty Maids All in a Row (1971)

6.2
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Ratings: 6.2/10 from 1,194 users  
Reviews: 39 user | 27 critic

There's murder at a California high school, where female students are being targeted by an unknown serial killer, a married teacher hides his flings with nubile students, and an awkward ... See full summary »

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Cast

Cast overview, first billed only:
...
Michael 'Tiger' McDrew
...
...
Captain Sam Surcher
John David Carson ...
Ponce de Leon Harper
...
Mr. Proffer
...
Chief John Poldaski
...
Follo
...
Grady
Susan Tolsky ...
Miss Harriet Craymire
...
Jean McDrew
Gretchen Parsons Carpenter ...
Marjorie (as Gretchen Burrell)
Aimée Eccles ...
Hilda Lee
JoAnna Cameron ...
Yvonne Millick
...
Polly
June Fairchild ...
Sonny Swangle
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Storyline

There's murder at a California high school, where female students are being targeted by an unknown serial killer, a married teacher hides his flings with nubile students, and an awkward male is frustrated by the plethora of uninhibited freewheeling young girls. Written by HC

Plot Summary | Plot Synopsis

Taglines:

A good football coach can get away with murder.

Genres:

Comedy | Crime | Thriller

Certificate:

R | See all certifications »

Parents Guide:

 »
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Details

Country:

Language:

Release Date:

12 July 1971 (Sweden)  »

Also Known As:

Querido profesor  »

Company Credits

Production Co:

 »
Show detailed on  »

Technical Specs

Runtime:

Sound Mix:

Color:

(Metrocolor)

Aspect Ratio:

1.85 : 1
See  »
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Did You Know?

Trivia

Telly Savalas who play the police detective is acting very much like Kojak two years before the role that would make him a household name. See more »

Goofs

In the overhead shot of Jill Fairbutt's dead body, the note is pinned to her right hip, and her pulled-up skirt is well above the top of her panties. In the closeup where Ponce reaches for the note, it is centered on her hips, and her skirt touches the top of her panties. See more »

Quotes

Michael 'Tiger' McDrew: [Deciding to go ahead with the scheduled football game] We play on Friday. Once you start retreating, life will drag you down.
See more »


Soundtracks

Chilly Winds
Music by Lalo Schifrin
Lyrics by Mike Curb
Performed by The Osmonds
Played over the opening credits
See more »

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User Reviews

 
Absolutely Bizarre but Fabulous
2 September 2006 | by (Planet Earth) – See all my reviews

A juicy bit of 70s kitsch right here for your viewing pleasure. Rock Hudson as a horny high school coach/guidance counselor who is nailing every girl in sight. This man is so hip, he has arranged the thumb tacks on his cork board into a peace sign. No wonder all the kids love him. Right on, man.

The luscious Angie Dickinson plays a substitute teacher who wears very short skirts and form-fitting sweaters. Not only does she get felt up by Hudson, she also enthusiastically deflowers the gawky teenage male virgin after extolling the virtues of John Milton's "Paradise Lost." Telly Savalas is the state police detective called upon to solve a series of murders of young girls at the high school, the first of which is charmingly named "Jill Fairbutt." No lollipop here. He is sucking on a cigarette, a cancer stick, a coffin nail! Who loves ya, baby? Nice job by Keenan Wynn is the wheezy geezer local sheriff assigned by Savalas to direct traffic after incompetently touching every bit of evidence at the first murder scene. Also by James Doohan ("Scotty" of Star Trek fame) as Savalas' underling. Too bad they couldn't have gotten Shatner to give Hudson a run for his money...

Also heard from is Roddy McDowell, twittery here as the high school principal, whose concern over the murders is limited to characterizing one of them as a "great little cheerleader." He comes complete with prim, nerdy, bespectacled secretary, de rigeur for the 70s.

In what other decade could something be listed as a comedy/crime/ thriller? Only the 70s, my friend. You can also groove to the opening song by the Osmonds, "Chilly Wind," which happens to be sung over Rock Hudson getting it on with a topless honey. Osmonds and boobies - my head just exploded.

If I'm not mistaken, I think I saw a very young Alfre Woodard as one of the students questioned by Savalas. Rock that afro, girl!

What can you expect by combining the directing talents of Roger Vadim and the writing of Gene Roddenberry? If you can ignore the misogyny of every female in this movie being a ditz/victim/sex object/cuckold, then you will enjoy this very of-its-time pre-sex-comedy-era sex comedy. With some murder thrown in. And a bit of mystery. And don't forget the Osmonds.


19 of 20 people found this review helpful.  Was this review helpful to you?

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