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Jennifer Jason Leigh,
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A bunch of 7 orphan cavemen grow up on a little island all by themselves. After a fire burns all vegetation they set out to find a new place to live. Here, one day they trap a strange animal, looking very similar to them, only softer and with longer hair. She (Filli) feels attracted to one of the brothers (Ulli) and convinces him, that a certain kind of playing with each other is far more satisfying than just eating her. He hides her and serves the other cavemen a goat. Soon Ulli and Filli are playing the Johnson-Game quite frequently. But the others find out about this and want to see what's so great with "johnsonning". After they all force Filli to show them the game too, she manages to flee with Ulli. Being pursued by the 6 men of Ulli's clan, they meet the rest of Filli's clan: A tribe of about 150 unsatisfied women, who just love to have new men around for playing. Written by
Julian Reischl <firstname.lastname@example.org>
Way back at the dawn of human civilization cavemen sat around and made lame jokes, hit each other over the heads with what ever they could grab, and women were never seen and apparently at one time had tails. These cavemen lived in a geographically diverse region with a cockatoo, a camel, a monkey - but no women. This film tells of the "hilarious" misadventures of seven(or so) cavemen - having burned their land with the new discovery of fire - moving on by water to a new land where they find this woman with the extra appendage. Along the way we get such "great" moments of comedy like a fat cavemen swallowing a frog that keeps croaking in his stomach. A monkey throwing rocks at their heads. A man swallowing a mouse to get the frog in his stomach. The obligatory "gay" caveman. The list could go on and on. This movie is the very definition of cinematic dreck. I was bored from the onset and it only got worse as the cavemen bobbled around hitting each other, making poor jokes such as puns on the word perch, hitting each other, and mauling poor Seta Berger who looks like she lost a bet to a producer to appear in this nonsense. She is indeed one of two bright spots in this film. She isn't much of an actress so you have to guess why she is an ass-et? The other "bright" spot is the music. As soon as I heard the score, I said to myself that it sounded very familiar. I had never heard the actual score but the music was unmistakably that of Ennio Morricone. It's a nice score and the best thing in an otherwise crude, boring, lewd, unimaginative, and ridiculous film essentially about a group of Moes finding a woman for the first time and, first wanting to eat her like some animal, being taught what she could do. Awwwwh! Sorry, I'm stifling a yawn as I relive the plot! The end of the film has some 100 or so mostly naked women on screen with all the erotic feel of pulling a scab off your knee. This movie was painful to sit through and offers nothing of any real merit whatsoever. The fact that it spawned a sequel doesn't surprise me as it offers that one thing which will prick viewer interest - tail.
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