Clyde King, a toy store employee whose hobbies include making wooden toys and stalking women, is coveted by the female owner of one of the biggest toy companies in the world. She is ... See full summary »
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In a land in a distant past, three beautiful women, members of a lost tribe, battle a male genius with diabolical plans to destroy their "Lost Empire." If the victor can find the sacred jewels, they can anticipate total power.
Raven De La Croix,
A proper English gentleman, traveling in the American West, inadvertently stops an Indian attack on the stagecoach in which he is a passenger. When the stage gets to the nearest town, the ... See full summary »
Clyde King, a toy store employee whose hobbies include making wooden toys and stalking women, is coveted by the female owner of one of the biggest toy companies in the world. She is enchanted by King's hand-carved toys, and she delegates the recruitment of the toy-maker to her second-in-command, Lyle "Skippy" Burns. However, King will not join her company as she reminds him of his mother. She becomes the subject of bizarre fantasies in which "Mother," the toy company owner as imagined by King, brow-beats and humiliates him. Discovering King's predeliction for leaving the toy store to stalk women, Skippy first tries to entice Clyde into signing an employemnt contract by supplying him with women, even going as far to dress himself up in drag as a prostitute. But every time he sets King up with a woman, the encounter ends disastrously, so Skippy finally decides to kill him. Written by
Jon C. Hopwood
Take the Monkees' movie "Head" (1968), "The Love God?" (1969) with Don Knotts, and Russ Meyer's "Beyond The Valley Of The Dolls" (1970), and put them in a blender. The resulting concoction would resemble "Up Your Teddy Bear" (a/k/a/ "The Seduction Of A Nerd.") Wally Cox stars as Clyde King, a toy designer who lives in a house filled with toys. He also likes to follow beautiful women as they're walking down the street. Mother (Julie Newmar) desperately wants him to work for her toy company. Her morbidly obese son Lyle "Skippy" Ferns (Victor Buono) gets the brilliant idea of having beautiful women seduce Clyde, which would persuade him to go to work for the Mother Knows Best Toy Company. Because Clyde has a Mother fixation, he can't bring himself to work for her company, no matter how beautiful the women tempting him are, including Angelique Pettyjohn. The groovy music for this movie was supplied by the legendary Quincy Jones. Wally Cox's dancing scene at a nightclub was hilarious. The scenes in which Wally was singing were painful to listen to. Victor Buono's scene where he attempts to get into a small compact car was painfully unfunny. Victor's scene where he dressed up in drag as a hooker was strangely reminiscent of Divine in "Pink Flamingos" (1972), and was one of the highlights of this film. Julie Newmar, who didn't appear in the movie nearly enough to satisfy me, was stunningly beautiful. In one of the bonus features, Julie is interviewed, around 35 years after the movie was made. She has high praise for the film and her fellow actors. Not surprisingly, she still looks beautiful!
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