The Undefeated (1969)
Col. James Langdon: If I can find the time, I'm going to sit down and write the social history of bourbon.
Col. John Henry Thomas: [Thomas and Langdon are talking to the Mexican bandit] Is the flap on your holster snapped or unsnapped, my Confederate friend?
Col. James Langdon: Snapped, my Yankee friend.
Col. John Henry Thomas: Then, I guess I'm his pigeon.
[Draws and fires as the Mexican goes for his gun]
Col. John Henry Thomas: [Thomas has just learned that the war ended several days before] Major, I've just received word that Lee surrendered to Grant three days ago.
Maj. Sanders, CSA: Yes, sir.
Col. John Henry Thomas: You knew it?
Maj. Sanders, CSA: We received the news yesterday.
Col. John Henry Thomas: I don't think you understand, Major, the war is over.
Maj. Sanders, CSA: NO, sir.
Col. John Henry Thomas: Are you telling me that you intend to keep fighting?
Maj. Sanders, CSA: Haven't we just proven it, sir?
Col. John Henry Thomas: But why?
Maj. Sanders, CSA: Because this is our land, and you're on it.
Col. John Henry Thomas: We're all Americans.
Maj. Sanders, CSA: Yes, sir... that's always been the saddest part of it.
Col. John Henry Thomas: Good day, sir.
Maj. Sanders, CSA: Colonel, thank you for your courtesy.
[McCartney is dying]
McCartney: Mr. McCartney. Shortgrub, I said a lot of mean things to the boys, didn't I?
Shortgrub: Yeah, you did.
McCartney: Tell them from me, I meant every damn word.
Ann Langdon: You went out there to talk, why did you have to shoot the man?
John Henry Thomas: Conversation kinda dried up, ma'am.
[during a tryst with Charlotte, she tells him she's sixteen]
Blue Boy: I like that you're so young. It gives us more time to be together.
Station-keeper: See'd your dust all day. What you drivin'? Buffalo?
Col. John Henry Thomas: Stage arrived yet?
Station-keeper: It's overdue. I ain't askin' cause I don't care, but if your name's Thomas there's a couple of poppinjays waitin' inside ta see ya. They been here for two days now. I give 'em water the first day and they've took'n root.
Col. John Henry Thomas: Government agents?
Station-keeper: I ain't asked. They ain't said.
Col. John Henry Thomas: Windage and elevation, Mrs. Langdon; windage and elevation.
Col. John Henry Thomas: [after seeing Cpl. Little George for the first time] You sure you wanna go through with this?
Bobby Joe: Biggest Reb I ever saw...
Col. John Henry Thomas: That's the biggest *anything* I ever saw.
[takes Bobby Joe's hat]
Col. John Henry Thomas: Here... I'll write your folks.
Bobby Joe: Huh? Oh... yeah.
Shortgrub: You ain't expecting trouble, are you John Henry?
Col. John Henry Thomas: Trouble? Well, let's see... We got Maximilian on one hand and Juarez on the other, and bandits in between. And on top of that, we're Americans in Mexico taking a cavvy of horses to a very unpopular government. Why should we expect trouble?
[Union Captain allows last escaping wagon to cross river]
Yankee sergeant at river: Sir, I don't mean to...
Union Capt. at river: I know, sergeant! But if I can't have the whole dog, I don't want the tail!
Yankee sergeant at river: Yes, sir.
Col. James Langdon: [on finding his men still in uniform] General Robert E. Lee surrendered, am I right?
Capt. Anderson: Yes, sir.
Col. James Langdon: That means that officially we no longer exist as an armed body; yet everywhere I look here today I see armed men, wearing uniforms and flying the battle flag! Get it down!
Shortgrub: Where to, John Henry?
Col. John Henry Thomas: Shortgrub, I've been tryin' for three years to get you to call me Colonel. Now it's too late.
Shortgrub: Where to, John Henry?
Col. James Langdon: [takes the bottle of whiskey from the Sargent] Let's just say we haven't seen the end yet.
Col. John Henry Thomas: [takes the bottle from Col. Langdon] You will if you keep drinkin' this stuff.
Shortgrub: [after being served a scoop of beans, picking at something with spoon] Hey... McCartney!
McCartney: *Mister* McCartney!
Shortgrub: There's somethin' crawlin' in these beans!
McCartney: Well, you can speak to it but don't play with it... or else the others'll want one in their beans too!