Putney Swope (1969)
Putney Swope: Rockin' the boat's a drag. You gotta sink the boat!
Photographer: I'll do it for nothing - I need the work!
Putney Swope: I can get anybody for nothing. Take a walk!
Commercial Narrator: Jim Keranga of Watts, California is eating a bowl of Ethereal Cereal, the heavenly breakfast. Jim, did you know that Ethereal has 25% more riboflavin than any other cereal on the market? Ethereal also packs the added punch of .002 ESP units of pectin!
Jim Keranga: No shit.
Mr. Victrola Cola: I got this great window cleaner. Cleans good and doesn't streak. Smells bad, though. Cleans good, but smells bad.
Putney Swope: As a window cleaner, forget it. Put soybeans in it and market it as a soft drink in the ghetto. We'll put a picture of a rhythm and blues singer on the front and call it Victrola Cola.
Reporter: Mr. Swope, did you sleep with your wife before you were married?
Putney Swope: Not a wink.
Mr. Syllables: How many syllables, Mario? How many syllables, Mario? How many syllables, Mario? How many syllables, Mario?
Putney Swope: I'm all stacked up over LaGuardia and I ain't coming down for anyone, not even you.
Idea Man: Putney! I've been supervising the war toy account for 12 years. And let me tell you something: deny a young boy the right to have a toy gun, and you'll suppress his destructive urges. And he'll turn out to be a homosexual. Or worse.