Frosty the Snowman (1969 TV Short)
Frosty: Happy birthday! Hey, I said my first words. But... But snowmen can't talk.
Frosty: All right, come on now, what's the joke? Could - could I really be alive?
Santa Claus: Now you go home and write "I am very sorry for what I did to Frosty" a hundred zillion times. And then maybe - just maybe, mind you - you'll find something in your stocking tomorrow morning.
Professor Hinkle: Like - a new hat, maybe? Ohh, yes, sir! Goodbye, everyone! Sorry to lose and run, but I've got to get busy writing, busy, busy, busy!
Professor Hinkle: I must get that hat back! Think nasty, think nasty, think nasty!
Frosty: Whew! Stay in here much longer and I'll really make a splash in the world.
Santa Claus: Don't cry, Karen, Frosty's not gone for good. You see, he was made out of Christmas snow and Christmas snow can never disappear completely. It sometimes goes away for almost a year at a time and takes the form of spring and summer rain. But you can bet your boots that when a good, jolly December wind kisses it, it will turn into Christmas snow all over again.
Karen: Yes, but... He was my friend.
Santa Claus: Just watch.
Boy #1: What shall we call him? Should we call him Harold?
Boy #2: Uh, Bruce?
Girl #1: Christopher Columbus?
Children: Oh, no.
Boy #3: Oatmeal?
Frosty: I mean - I can make words. I can move... I can juggle... I can sweep... and I can count to ten. One, two, three, four, five, nine, six, eight... Well, I can count to five.
Frosty: What do you know? I'm even ticklish. In fact, I'm all livin'! I *am* alive! What a neat thing to happen to a nice guy like me.
Karen: What's the matter, Frosty?
Frosty: Whew! Is there a thermometer around here?
Karen: Over there in the wall. Why?
Frosty: [looks at the thermometer] Oh. I was afraid of that. The thermometer's getting red. I hate red thermometers.
Karen: Why, Frosty?
Frosty: 'Cause when the thermometer gets all reddish, the temperature goes up. And when the temperature goes up, I start to melt! And when I start to melt, I get all wishy-washy.
Traffic Cop: What's the matter? Didn't you see that traffic light?
Frosty: What's a traffic light?
Traffic Cop: Up there on that lamppost.
Frosty: What's a lamppost?
Traffic Cop: You want a ticket, wise guy?
Frosty: I'd love one. To the North Pole, please.
Narrator: Now actually, a refrigerated boxcar was a splendid way to travel. Splendid, that is, if one is a snowman or a furry coated rabbit. But for Karen...
Karen: Are you cold, Karen? Now that's a silly question. You wouldn't be sneezing if you weren't cold.
Frosty: [shivering] Well... just - a lit - a little.
Karen: You've got to excuse him, sir. You see, he just came to life, and he doesn't know much about such things.
Traffic Cop: Oh, well, okay, if he just came to life.
Traffic Cop: Move along!
[to himself after Frosty and the kids leave]
Traffic Cop: That silly snowman. Once they come to life, they don't know nothin'.
[blows his whistle squeakily]
Traffic Cop: Come to life?
[accidentally swallows his whistle]
Narrator: I suppose it all started with the snow. You see, it was a very special kind of snow. A snow that made the happy happier, and the giddy even giddier. A snow that'd make a homecoming homier, and natural enemies, friends, natural. For it was the first snow of the season. And as any child can tell you, there's a certain magic that comes with the very first snow, especially when it falls on the day before Christmas. For when the first snow is also a Christmas snow...
Narrator: Well, something wonderful is bound to happen.
Professor Hinkle: [performing his magic trick] And so, I put the magic eggs into my hat. Abracadabra, to coin a phrase.
Professor Hinkle: And voila, the eggs have turned into...
[the eggs drop to the floor and crack]
Professor Hinkle: Messy, messy, messy.
[covers the mess]
Narrator: Frosty realized that Karen had to get out of that car as soon as possible. So when the little freight train stopped to let an express full of happy Christmas travelers pass, Frosty took advantage of the opportunity and quickly got them all out.
Professor Hinkle: [after seeing that Santa Claus has brought Frosty back to life] Wait a minute! I want that hat, and I want it now!
Santa Claus: DON'T YOU DARE TOUCH THAT.
Professor Hinkle: And just what are *you* going to do about it?
Santa Claus: If you so much as lay a finger on the brim, I will never bring you another Christmas present as long as you live.
Professor Hinkle: [traumatized] Never?
Santa Claus: Never.
Professor Hinkle: No more... trick cards or... magic balls or...?
Santa Claus: No more anything.
Narrator: You see, Frosty, since he was made out of snow, was the fastest belly-whopper... in the world.
Professor Hinkle: We evil magicians have to make a living, too.
Narrator: Hocus explained the situation to Santa, who as you know, speaks a fluent rabbit. And, when they didn't find Frosty and Karen on the hill, Santa followed Frosty's path in the snow to the greenhouse. But when they got inside, a terrible sight met their eyes.
Professor Hinkle: Now, give me that hat, or else.
Frosty: Or else - what?
Professor Hinkle: Oh... well, don't bother me with details. Give me that hat!
Boy #1: [rolling a giant snowball to Karen] We're building a snowman, Karen. You make the head.
Karen: [mounting another snowball on top of the first one] The head is the most difficult part. Ask anyone.
Professor Hinkle: If that hat is magic, I want it back!
Karen: But it's not yours anymore; you threw it away!
Professor Hinkle: Don't talk back to your elders, you... you naughty, naughty, little girl.
[to Hocus, as he loads him back into the hat]
Professor Hinkle: And you, stay in there, or there'll be no carrots for Christmas!
Frosty: Are you coming to the North Pole, too?
Karen: I'm sure my mother won't mind, as long as I'm home in time for supper.
Professor Hinkle: You silly children believe everything you see. When you grow up, you'll realize that snowmen can't come to life.
Karen: But we...
Professor Hinkle: Silly, silly, silly!
Karen: We'd like a ticket to the North Pole, please.
Ticket Master: [awakens from his nap] Oh! Wha - The North Pole? Oh! Yes, ma'am!
[He rapidly stacks thousands of tickets, lays them out, and stamps them all]
Ticket Master: Route you by the way of Saskatchewan, Hudson Bay, Nome, Alaska; the Klondike, and Aurora Borealis! Gotta make a change at Nanook of the North, though.
Ticket Master: That'll be $3,000.04, including tax.
Karen: Oh! But... we don't have any money.
Ticket Master: NO MONEY?
[Tickets fly everywhere]
Ticket Master: No money, no TICKET!
[He slams the window shut]
Professor Hinkle: [looking into his hat] Where is that rabbit? Hocus-Pocus, where are, you? Bah! The only thing this hat's good for is the trash can!
Frosty: This looks like a good place to keep warm, and I'd love to look at the beautiful poinsettias in there. Let's go in.
Karen: But you'll melt.
Frosty: Just a little. I'm only gonna be in there for a minute. Besides, I've been wanting to lose a few pounds anyway.
Karen: [seeing Hocus-Pocus with Frosty's hat] Look, the hat's back. Let's see if it'll make Frosty alive again.
Professor Hinkle: Aw, a campfire! Well, isn't that all snug and comfy?
[laughs, then blows the fire out]
Professor Hinkle: Voila, the eggs have turned into... messy, messy, messy!
Teacher: [seeing the children out of their seats looking at the snow outside the window and taps ruler on her desk] Children, back to your seats. The snow can wait. Now, now... I've hired Professor Hinkle the magician to entertain at today's class Christmas party, so pay attention.
Professor Hinkle: Now I've got you! And the minute you're all melted, that hat will be mine!
Boy #1: But you can't take that hat back! It brought Frosty to life.
Karen: You saw it happen!
Professor Hinkle: I saw nothing of the kind.