Cactus Flower (1969)
Stephanie: Funny how whenever people hurt your feelings, they're always doing it for your own good.
Stephanie: Well... I am no sex goddess, but I haven't spent my life up on a tree.
Stephanie: I was married, when I was young.
Dr. Julian Winston: Married? I had no idea!
Stephanie: Neither did he!
Toni Simmons: [Describing the first time she met Julian] He was charming, good looking, sophisticated, no sweatshirts.
Igor Sullivan: [Looks down] Sorry, I didn't know this suicide was black tie.
Señor Sánchez: [Meeting on the dance floor] Good evening, doctor.
Dr. Julian Winston: Good evening, patient.
Dr. Julian Winston: Hey, did you see that? He just kissed her on the neck!
Toni Simmons: Hmph! She sure likes a lot of action.
Dr. Julian Winston: Yes, she does, doesn't she!
Toni Simmons: Right now, she's surrounded by her husband, her ex-boyfriend, her current boyfriend and maybe her future boyfriend.
Dr. Julian Winston: If somebody doesn't stop that guy, he's gonna make love to her right in the middle of the floor.
Dr. Julian Winston: I must say, it's grotesque. A woman your age, throwing yourself at a kid like that!
Stephanie: And what about that eh, father-daughter thing of yours, if you don't think that's ridiculous...
Dr. Julian Winston: Well, it's different for a man. If a man is with a younger woman it looks entirely appropriate, but when it's the other way around, it's disg...
Stephanie: Well, you go to your church and I'll go to mine.
Dr. Julian Winston: Stephanie?
Dr. Julian Winston: I think I'm going to kiss you.
Stephanie: When will you know for sure?
Dr. Julian Winston: [They kiss passionately] I plan to do this often.
Stephanie: I'll make a note to remind you.
Harvey Greenfield: Drink up. It'll make me look better to you.
Stephanie: There isn't that much wine in the world.
Harvey Greenfield: To our love affair.
Stephanie: God forbid.
Toni Simmons: Well, what can be bigger than black leather slacks? OK, I give up.
[opens the box]
Toni Simmons: A mink stole! A mink stole! And a card, too! "Your next appointment is on..."
[Julian turns the card over for her]
Toni Simmons: "As ever, Julian."
Stephanie: [looking at the label on the bottle] Oh, I didn't know they made champagne in Idaho.
Toni Simmons: A man who lies cannot love.
Stephanie: [about to close the door] That sounds like something out of a fortune cookie.
Toni Simmons: [after Stephanie leaves] Dirty married bachelor!
[an Airline hostess from an Australian airline has phoned to ask if Dr Winston is free for a date that evening]
Dr. Julian Winston: Tell her I'm grounded!
Stephanie: [down the phone] I'm sorry, Miss, but Dr Winston doesn't do that kind of work any more.
[in the X-ray room, Julian reveals that he has hurt Mrs Durant - the first time he has caused a patient pain]
Stephanie: Pity it wasn't Mr Greenfield!
Igor Sullivan: You're lucky I broke in.
Toni Simmons: Why did you?
Igor Sullivan: I thought you were dying.
Toni Simmons: Well, that was the whole idea.
Igor Sullivan: That's the last time you catch me saving your life.
Igor Sullivan: You were going about it all wrong. I believe you're supposed to put your head in the stove.
Toni Simmons: It's a second hand stove. There were no directions.
Stephanie: Really, Mrs Durant. Your teeth are more important than your hair.
Mrs. Durant: You really believe that, don't you. Sad.
Stephanie: Mr Greenfield, please don't handle the instruments.
Harvey Greenfield: I was reading the other day, a dentist in New Jersey has topless nurses.
Stephanie: I didn't know you were interested in reading.
Toni Simmons: [after Julian bursts into the apartment] I didn't know dentists made house calls.
[Toni reveals she tried to commit suicide]
Dr. Julian Winston: You really tried to kill yourself over me?
Toni Simmons: Stupid, wasn't it?
Dr. Julian Winston: I'm a bastard, the biggest bastard in the whole world.
Toni Simmons: Julian, please, you're starting to make it sound like bragging.
Dr. Julian Winston: Toni, I'm going to marry you.
Toni Simmons: How do you mean, Marry?
Dr. Julian Winston: You know, marry, with the judge, the blood test, the license, that kind of marry, right away.
Toni Simmons: But what about your wife?
Dr. Julian Winston: My wife? I'll divorce her.
Toni Simmons: What about the children?
Dr. Julian Winston: I'll divorce them, too.
Señor Sánchez: There is something so provocative about a nurse in uniform. No frills. No adorments. Just the basic woman.
Stephanie: [after putting the x-ray gun into place] Hold still, Señor Sánchez, or the basic woman is liable to x-ray your nose.
Toni Simmons: And did you get a load of that girl?
Dr. Julian Winston: Well, I wasn't paying much attention...
Toni Simmons: When she bent over, it looked like she had her knees up inside her dress.
Dr. Julian Winston: Now if I hear that you've been bothering Stephanie again, I'll knock all your teeth out.
Harvey Greenfield: You'll just have to put them back in again.
Dr. Julian Winston: Her name is Toni Simmons.
Stephanie: Oh. I'm supposed to give you a message: She's alive.
Dr. Julian Winston: What did she say?
Toni Simmons: It's not what she said, it's what she didn't say
Dr. Julian Winston: Tell me what she didn't say, word for word
Dr. Julian Winston: [Talking to Harvey, about Toni] I'm having a rough time. As long as I was lying to her, everything was fine. The minute I decided to do the right thing and marry her, I've had troubles. You wouldn't believe the complications. It's like waltzing in wet cement.
Stephanie: Did you ever have a gin and tonic made with tequila?
Dr. Julian Winston: [Looking slightly disgusted] Gin and tequila?
Stephanie: Yes. They call it the 'Mexican *Measles*'
Dr. Julian Winston: [Correcting her] 'Missile.'
Stephanie: They tell me it prevents malaria.
Dr. Julian Winston: [Talking about trying to recover his car which had been towed earlier] I went to the police station. They told me to try a garage on the East Side. When I got there they told me to try the West Side. When I got there, it was closed. I couldn't find a cab so I had to walk home. I should have listened to my mother and become an M.D. - they let you park anywhere.
Toni Simmons: Now why don't you go back and mind your own business like everyone else in New York City?
Toni Simmons: What were you doing, talking to that awful man?
Dr. Julian Winston: I was getting lonesome for the sound of a human voice.
Igor Sullivan: Can I have another glass of beer?
Dr. Julian Winston: Not yours!
Harvey Greenfield: [after Julian reveals that he told Toni he was married] That's such a big dirty rotten filthy lie, it has class.
[Toni realises that she's being kissed by someone other than Julian]
Toni Simmons: Who are you? What are you doing?
Igor Sullivan: Mouth to Mouth resuscitation.
Toni Simmons: You were kissing me!
Igor Sullivan: I lost my head!
[Greenfield has asked for free dental work for his latest girlfriend]
Dr. Julian Winston: Don't you know any girls with straight teeth?
Dr. Julian Winston: [pointing to Igor] Will you give Tarzan here his electric razor?
[Julian has asked Stephanie if she would like to have a drink with him]
Stephanie: Are you asking me to go out?
Dr. Julian Winston: Why? Is there someone else in that closet?
Dr. Julian Winston: You're getting as prickly as your damn cactus!
[Igor reveals he's a writer]
Toni Simmons: You're a writer? You're the writer! The one who keeps pounding on his typewriter all night - you drive me crazy!
Igor Sullivan: Why didn't you complain so I could have met you earlier?
[Miss Dickinson has pointed out there is no more room on Greenfield's tab]
Harvey Greenfield: Julian, I feel insulted. It isn't as if I'm planning to stick ya.
Dr. Julian Winston: It isn't as if you're planning to pay me, either.
Harvey Greenfield: Now look, I can give you a dozen explanations, but you might as well know the real one: I'm a member of the CIA.
Georgia: The CIA? I thought you were a television actor?
Harvey Greenfield: That's my cover. So if you ever see me in public with another girl you must pretend not to know me, or it could put my life in great danger.
Georgia: If you work for the CIA, how come you hang around with dentists?
Harvey Greenfield: He's installing a miniature radio transmitor in my wisdom tooth.
Dr. Julian Winston: What happened out there on my mink stole? - I mean the beach. I wanna know.
Mrs. Durant: Oh, isn't he a marvelous dentist?
Harvey Greenfield: Great.
Mrs. Durant: But with his talents he would have made an even better obstetrician.
Toni Simmons: [after they've observed Stephanie's prowess on the dance floor] Everything you told me about your wife was true. She's not a lady, she's a barracuda!
Dr. Julian Winston: I don't care to discuss it anymore.
Harvey Greenfield: In the office, you sort of look like a large Bandaid.
Dr. Julian Winston: It's just not practical to keep one in the city.
Stephanie: A girl?
Dr. Julian Winston: No, a CAR !
Stephanie: Julian is going to marry you. A lot of girls would leap at that sort of swindle.