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Cactus Flower (1969) Poster

(1969)

Quotes

Stephanie: Funny how whenever people hurt your feelings, they're always doing it for your own good.

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Stephanie: Well... I am no sex goddess, but I haven't spent my life up on a tree.

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Stephanie: I was married, when I was young.

Dr. Julian Winston: Married? I had no idea!

Stephanie: Neither did he!

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Toni Simmons: [Describing the first time she met Julian] He was charming, good looking, sophisticated, no sweatshirts.

Igor Sullivan: [Looks down] Sorry, I didn't know this suicide was black tie.

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Señor Sánchez: [Meeting on the dance floor] Good evening, doctor.

Dr. Julian Winston: Good evening, patient.

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Dr. Julian Winston: Hey, did you see that? He just kissed her on the neck!

Toni Simmons: Hmph! She sure likes a lot of action.

Dr. Julian Winston: Yes, she does, doesn't she!

Toni Simmons: Right now, she's surrounded by her husband, her ex-boyfriend, her current boyfriend and maybe her future boyfriend.

Dr. Julian Winston: If somebody doesn't stop that guy, he's gonna make love to her right in the middle of the floor.

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Dr. Julian Winston: Where were you all night?

Stephanie: It's all a blur, a beautiful blurry blur.

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Dr. Julian Winston: I must say, it's grotesque. A woman your age, throwing yourself at a kid like that!

Stephanie: And what about that eh, father-daughter thing of yours, if you don't think that's ridiculous...

Dr. Julian Winston: Well, it's different for a man. If a man is with a younger woman it looks entirely appropriate, but when it's the other way around, it's disg...

Stephanie: Well, you go to your church and I'll go to mine.

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Dr. Julian Winston: Stephanie?

Stephanie: Doctor?

Dr. Julian Winston: I think I'm going to kiss you.

Stephanie: When will you know for sure?

Dr. Julian Winston: [They kiss passionately] I plan to do this often.

Stephanie: I'll make a note to remind you.

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Harvey Greenfield: Drink up. It'll make me look better to you.

Stephanie: There isn't that much wine in the world.

Harvey Greenfield: To our love affair.

[clinking glasses]

Stephanie: God forbid.

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Toni Simmons: Well, what can be bigger than black leather slacks? OK, I give up.

[opens the box]

Toni Simmons: A mink stole! A mink stole! And a card, too! "Your next appointment is on..."

[Julian turns the card over for her]

Toni Simmons: "As ever, Julian."

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Stephanie: [looking at the label on the bottle] Oh, I didn't know they made champagne in Idaho.

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Toni Simmons: A man who lies cannot love.

Stephanie: [about to close the door] That sounds like something out of a fortune cookie.

Toni Simmons: [after Stephanie leaves] Dirty married bachelor!

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[an Airline hostess from an Australian airline has phoned to ask if Dr Winston is free for a date that evening]

Dr. Julian Winston: Tell her I'm grounded!

Stephanie: [down the phone] I'm sorry, Miss, but Dr Winston doesn't do that kind of work any more.

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[in the X-ray room, Julian reveals that he has hurt Mrs Durant - the first time he has caused a patient pain]

Stephanie: Pity it wasn't Mr Greenfield!

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Igor Sullivan: You're lucky I broke in.

Toni Simmons: Why did you?

Igor Sullivan: I thought you were dying.

Toni Simmons: Well, that was the whole idea.

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Igor Sullivan: That's the last time you catch me saving your life.

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Igor Sullivan: You were going about it all wrong. I believe you're supposed to put your head in the stove.

Toni Simmons: It's a second hand stove. There were no directions.

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Stephanie: Really, Mrs Durant. Your teeth are more important than your hair.

Mrs. Durant: You really believe that, don't you. Sad.

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Stephanie: Mr Greenfield, please don't handle the instruments.

Harvey Greenfield: I was reading the other day, a dentist in New Jersey has topless nurses.

Stephanie: I didn't know you were interested in reading.

[She exits]

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Toni Simmons: [after Julian bursts into the apartment] I didn't know dentists made house calls.

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[Toni reveals she tried to commit suicide]

Dr. Julian Winston: You really tried to kill yourself over me?

Toni Simmons: Stupid, wasn't it?

Dr. Julian Winston: I'm a bastard, the biggest bastard in the whole world.

Toni Simmons: Julian, please, you're starting to make it sound like bragging.

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Dr. Julian Winston: Toni, I'm going to marry you.

Toni Simmons: How do you mean, Marry?

Dr. Julian Winston: You know, marry, with the judge, the blood test, the license, that kind of marry, right away.

Toni Simmons: But what about your wife?

Dr. Julian Winston: My wife? I'll divorce her.

Toni Simmons: What about the children?

Dr. Julian Winston: I'll divorce them, too.

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Señor Sánchez: There is something so provocative about a nurse in uniform. No frills. No adorments. Just the basic woman.

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Stephanie: [after putting the x-ray gun into place] Hold still, Señor Sánchez, or the basic woman is liable to x-ray your nose.

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Toni Simmons: And did you get a load of that girl?

Dr. Julian Winston: Well, I wasn't paying much attention...

Toni Simmons: When she bent over, it looked like she had her knees up inside her dress.

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Dr. Julian Winston: Now if I hear that you've been bothering Stephanie again, I'll knock all your teeth out.

Harvey Greenfield: You'll just have to put them back in again.

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Dr. Julian Winston: Her name is Toni Simmons.

Stephanie: Oh. I'm supposed to give you a message: She's alive.

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Señor Sánchez: What shall we drink?

Stephanie: Oh, let's have some of that crazy Idaho champagne.

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Dr. Julian Winston: What did she say?

Toni Simmons: It's not what she said, it's what she didn't say

Dr. Julian Winston: Tell me what she didn't say, word for word

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Dr. Julian Winston: It's like waltzing in wet cement!

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Stephanie: How do you like children?

Harvey Greenfield: Barbecued.

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Dr. Julian Winston: [Talking to Harvey, about Toni] I'm having a rough time. As long as I was lying to her, everything was fine. The minute I decided to do the right thing and marry her, I've had troubles. You wouldn't believe the complications. It's like waltzing in wet cement.

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Stephanie: Did you ever have a gin and tonic made with tequila?

Dr. Julian Winston: [Looking slightly disgusted] Gin and tequila?

Stephanie: Yes. They call it the 'Mexican *Measles*'

Dr. Julian Winston: [Correcting her] 'Missile.'

Stephanie: They tell me it prevents malaria.

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Dr. Julian Winston: [Talking about trying to recover his car which had been towed earlier] I went to the police station. They told me to try a garage on the East Side. When I got there they told me to try the West Side. When I got there, it was closed. I couldn't find a cab so I had to walk home. I should have listened to my mother and become an M.D. - they let you park anywhere.

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Toni Simmons: Now why don't you go back and mind your own business like everyone else in New York City?

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Harvey Greenfield: Let me put it to you this way: shut up.

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Toni Simmons: What were you doing, talking to that awful man?

Dr. Julian Winston: I was getting lonesome for the sound of a human voice.

Igor Sullivan: Can I have another glass of beer?

Dr. Julian Winston: Not yours!

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Harvey Greenfield: [after Julian reveals that he told Toni he was married] That's such a big dirty rotten filthy lie, it has class.

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[Toni realises that she's being kissed by someone other than Julian]

Toni Simmons: Who are you? What are you doing?

Igor Sullivan: Mouth to Mouth resuscitation.

Toni Simmons: You were kissing me!

Igor Sullivan: I lost my head!

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[Greenfield has asked for free dental work for his latest girlfriend]

Dr. Julian Winston: Don't you know any girls with straight teeth?

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Dr. Julian Winston: [pointing to Igor] Will you give Tarzan here his electric razor?

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[Julian has asked Stephanie if she would like to have a drink with him]

Stephanie: Are you asking me to go out?

Dr. Julian Winston: Why? Is there someone else in that closet?

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Dr. Julian Winston: You're getting as prickly as your damn cactus!

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[Igor reveals he's a writer]

Toni Simmons: You're a writer? You're the writer! The one who keeps pounding on his typewriter all night - you drive me crazy!

Igor Sullivan: Why didn't you complain so I could have met you earlier?

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[Miss Dickinson has pointed out there is no more room on Greenfield's tab]

Harvey Greenfield: Julian, I feel insulted. It isn't as if I'm planning to stick ya.

Dr. Julian Winston: It isn't as if you're planning to pay me, either.

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Harvey Greenfield: Now look, I can give you a dozen explanations, but you might as well know the real one: I'm a member of the CIA.

Georgia: The CIA? I thought you were a television actor?

Harvey Greenfield: That's my cover. So if you ever see me in public with another girl you must pretend not to know me, or it could put my life in great danger.

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Georgia: If you work for the CIA, how come you hang around with dentists?

Harvey Greenfield: He's installing a miniature radio transmitor in my wisdom tooth.

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Dr. Julian Winston: What happened out there on my mink stole? - I mean the beach. I wanna know.

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Mrs. Durant: Oh, isn't he a marvelous dentist?

Harvey Greenfield: Great.

Mrs. Durant: But with his talents he would have made an even better obstetrician.

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Toni Simmons: [after they've observed Stephanie's prowess on the dance floor] Everything you told me about your wife was true. She's not a lady, she's a barracuda!

Dr. Julian Winston: I don't care to discuss it anymore.

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Harvey Greenfield: In the office, you sort of look like a large Bandaid.

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Mrs. Durant: I've a very good nose for sexual tension.

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Stephanie: No-one needs a reason to hate Harvey.

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Dr. Julian Winston: It's just not practical to keep one in the city.

Stephanie: A girl?

Dr. Julian Winston: No, a CAR !

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Stephanie: Julian is going to marry you. A lot of girls would leap at that sort of swindle.

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Stephanie: Why did you choose this place?

Harvey Greenfield: It's the new in-spot.

Stephanie: I never heard of it.

Harvey Greenfield: Nobody has, that's why it's so popular.

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See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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