2 September 1968
9 September 1968
16 September 1968
23 September 1968
30 September 1968
7 October 1968
14 October 1968
21 October 1968
27 July 1969
The musical guests are Kenny Ball and His Jazzmen, Bobbie Gentry and Vince Hill. Ernie is sick and then Eric and Ernie play tortoises. Peter Cushing stars as King Arthur in the final sketch "King Arthur and the Knights of the Round Table".
10 August 1969
Musical guests are Kenny Ball & His Jazzmen, Malcolm Roberts and Trio Athenee. Ernie reads some poetry and then Eric disrupts Ernie's sleep. They go bird watching but Ernie has an ulterior motive. Finally, Eric remembers D-day.
24 August 1969
Musical guests are Kennyball & His Jazzmen, The Pattersons and Moira Anderson. Juliet Mills is the guest actor. The sketches include Eric reading Ernie's body, Ernie has an au pair, and Ernie's play is called "The Tea Planter's Wife".
7 September 1969
In the opening, Eric has brought an Incan talisman from Peru to show Ernie. Kennyball and His Jazzman perform "I Wan'na Be Like You". Eric is bored again at home and reminisces with Ernie about their school days. The Pattersons sing "What Would You Do If You Married A Soldier?". Peter Cushing makes a cameo asking for his payment for his last appearance. Kenneth McKellar performs "I Will Wait for You". Edward Woodward is the guest actor and is in the role of a policeman in Ernie's play called "Murder at the Grange".
25 December 1969
The musical guests are Kenny Ball and His Jazzmen, The Pattersons, Nina van Pallandt and Frankie Vaughan. Ernie starts the show dressed as a hippy. Eric and Ernie visit Fenella Fielding who is to star in Ernie's play about Lord Nelson.
14 January 1970
The musical guests are Kenny Ball and His Jazzmen, The Pattersons and Herman's Hermits. Eric and Ernie have a variety of conversations including the news that Ernie will be getting married.
28 January 1970
The musical guests are Kenny Ball and His Jazzmen, the Pattersons and Clodagh Rodgers. Eric has heard that there is too much sex in the show. Ernie written a play called Trouble at Mill'. Ernie has a date with Princess Anne.
11 February 1970
The musical guests are Kenny Ball and His Jazzmen, The Pattersons and Sacha Distel. Ernie has trouble taking a bath and Fenella Fielding stars as Lady Hamilton in Ernie's latest play.
11 March 1970
Eric wears a wig on the opening segment, which causes much discussion. Kenny Ball and His Jazzmen perform a musical item 'Midnight in Moscow. Frank Thornton plays the waiter when Eric and Ernie visit a restaurant to meet Diane Cilento, who has agreed to appear in his play. The Pattersons perform 'Both Sides, Now'. Vince Hill sings 'Don't Speak of Love'. Diane Cilento stars as a shy talented girl in Ernie's play 'The Barretts of Wimpole Street'. Diane expects Rock Hudson to appear but Deryck Guyler appears instead. He does a little washboard musical number.
25 March 1970
Musical guests are Kenny Ball and His Jazzmen, The Pattersons and Nina (van Pallandt). Eric plays a practical joke on Ernie so that he leaves home for his Aunt Ethel. Ian Carmichael stars in Ernie's play 'Frankenstein's Monster'.
22 April 1970
The musical guests are Kenny Ball and His Jazzmen, The Pattersons, and Nana Mouskouri & The Athenians. Ernie is in his scout uniform, they have trouble with the electric blanket and Richard Greene stars in Ernie's play 'The Lost Valley'.
1 July 1970
The musical guests are Kenny Ball and His Jazzmen, Trio Athénée and Jan Daley. Ernie believes he is to be on This is Your Life. Eric practises his ventriloquism. Eric Porter stars in Ernie's play 'Wuthering Heights'.
15 July 1970
Music guests are Kenny Ball and His Jazzmen, Samantha Jones and Kenneth McKellar. The opening shows Eric ready for a fox hunt. We then meet his parents when Eric and Ernie visit them. Eric thinks that Ernie has got a woman pregnant.
29 July 1970
The musical guests are Kenny Ball and His Jazzmen, Craig Douglas and Nina van Pallandt. Eric tries to get Ernie eating healthy, Ernie wants to buy some underwear for his sister as a birthday present.
12 August 1970
The musical guests are Kenny Ball and His Jazzmen, Sylvia McNeill and Ray Stevens. Ernie is injured that means he is late for the opening. Fenella Fielding is the guest who stars as Lady Bedworthy in Ernie's tribute to Noel Coward.
26 August 1970
Musical guests are Kenny Ball and His Jazzmen, Bruce & Peter Davis and Dusty Springfield. Eric is having trouble getting a person to work with him. Barbara Murray stars in Ernie's play "There's No Business Like Big Business".
8 October 1970
25 December 1970
The musical guests are Kenny Ball and His Jazzmen, Eric Porter, Nina van Pallandt, and Edward Woodward. Eric and Ernie exchange gifts, Peter Cushing wants his money. William Franklyn stars in Ernie's new play 'The Three Musketeers'.
8 April 1971
The musical guests are Kenny Ball and His Jazzmen, Peter & Alex and Esther Ofarim. Ernie tries to impress Flora Robson, but not with Eric playing his the butler. Flora Robson stars as Queen Elizabeth I in Ernie's play.
22 April 1971
Musical guests are Kenny Ball and His Jazzmen, Robert Young and Susan Maughan. Janet Webb appears in the opening at the request of Arthur Lowe. Ernie's play is "Mutiny on the Bounty" with Arthur Lowe as Captain Bligh.
6 May 1971
Musical guests are Kenny Ball and His Jazzmen, The Settlers and Fank Ifield. Eric and Ernie both get new opening partners. Ernie has writer's block and Eric makes the suggestion that he should write a musical.
20 May 1971
The musical guests are Kenny Ball and His Jazzmen, Sheila Southern and Jack Jones. Ernie is encouraged to take up modelling by Eric. Ernie is feeling ill and gets little sympathy and help from Eric.
3 June 1971
The musical guests are Ronnie Hilton and Mary Hopkin. On the opening, Ernie announces his retirement and Eric gives him a tribute. Glenda Jackson stars as Queen Cleopatra in Ernie's play called 'Antony and Cleopatra'.
17 June 1971
Musical Guests are Peter & Alex, Kiki Dee and Matt Monro. Ernie demonstrates his intellect. Ernie helps Eric to get a wig. Ian Carmichael stars in Ernie's play, which is called 'Mystery in Mayfair'.
15 July 1971
Musical guests are Kenny Ball and His Jazzmen, Design and Trio Athénée. Eric and Ernie read out some newspaper critiques. Eric appears to have communication problem with Ernie. Ernie is offered a job writing jokes for Bob Hope.
19 September 1971
The musical guests are Kenny Ball and His Jazzmen, Robert Young and Anita Harris. Eric starts the show with a microphone and tape recorder. Ernie plays a librarian. Francis Matthews plays Vivian Darling in "The House of Terror".
26 September 1971
Musical guests are Kenny Ball and His Jazzmen, Design and Keith Michell. Eric opens up with some talk about premonitions. Eric is at the doctors for an unusual complaint. Keith Michell stars in Ernie's play called "The Legion of the Lost".
3 October 1971
Musical guests are Kenny Ball and His Jazzmen, Ronnie Carroll and Cilla Black. Eric hosts Percy Thrower in a gardening show. Cilla Black brings Ernie a recording contract. There is a look into the future to when Eric and Ernie have split.
10 October 1971
Musical guests are Kenny Ball and His Jazzmen, Mrs. Mills and Trio Athénée. Eric has received a death threat, and then participates in a TV game show. John Mills stars as Major Faversham in Ernie's play called "Escape from Stalag 54".
17 October 1971
The musical guests are The Pattersons, Kenny Ball and His Jazzmen and Nina van Pallandt. Ernies is to be a guest on 'Great Men in Our Time'. Eric and Ernie discus the news of the day found in the newspapers.
31 October 1971
The musical guests are Kenny Ball and His Jazzmen, Design and Tom Jones. Eric brings in Ernie's family tree. Eric becomes a musical conductor. Ernie and Eric start writing their memoirs.
25 December 1971
The musical guests are Los Zafiros, Glenda Jackson, André Previn and Shirley Bassey. A variety of sketches finishes with Ernie's latest play called 'The Adventures of Robin Hood' starring Francis Matthews as King RIchard.
25 December 1972
The musical guests are Kenny Ball & His Jazzmen, Jack Jones, Vera Lynn and Glenda Jackson. Eric starts with a series of practical tricks. One play is 'Dawn Patrol', set in a WWI RAF base and Ernie's play is called 'Victoria and Albert'.
5 January 1973
The musical guests are Cliff Richard and Vikki Carr. Ernie comes out dressed as an old man ready for the role in a new film. Eric and Ernie play a game of tennis. Ernie is going to do a dance routine with Cliff Richard and Eric joins in.
12 January 1973
Musical guests are New World and Vicky Leandros. Ernie play music whilst Eric recites some poetry. Ernie's play is called 'The Curse of Tutankhamun' and Robert Morley plays Sir Robert, an archaeologist looking for a hidden tomb.
19 January 1973
The musical guests are Rostal and Schaefer, and Lulu. Eric starts the show with an emergency. Eric and Ernie go to a music shop looking for musicians. Eric has trouble on a park bench. Percy Edwards drops in to do some bird calls.
26 January 1973
The musical guests are Georgie Fame and Alan Price, and The Settlers. Eric and Ernie start by advertising some lapel badges for sale. Ernie introduces his new album. Susan Hampshire stars in Ernie's play called 'The Mighty Kong'.
2 February 1973
Musical guests are Design and Wilma Reading. Ernie is in charge of a record store when Eric comes in. Frank Finlay is to star as Casanova in Ernie's new play 'Lust over London'.
9 February 1973
Musical guests are Alex Welsh and his Band, and Helen Reddy. Eric opens the show and gives Ernie a gift and they then see a psychiatrist. They go on a train journey and taste some chips. Ernie buys healthy food at the supermarket.
16 February 1973
The musical guest is Anita Harris. Ernie introduces Mr Memory and then Anita Harris. They all do a song and dance routine called "Pretty Baby". Eric dreams of times past, when England still had an empire.
23 February 1973
Eric tells Ernie about his membership of the 'Foreign Movie Club'. Other sketches include 'The Historical Tree', 'Ernie's Hollywood Party Impressions', 'Byron Meets Keats', 'Reading Comics in Bed', and 'Investing Ernie's Legacy'. There is music from special guests Springfield Revival and Wilma Reading.
2 March 1973
The musical guests are Christopher Neil and Mary Travers. Eric gets the audience to sing "Happy Birthday" to Ernie. Eric and Ernie go shopping and meet Hannah Gordon. She stars in Eric's play, 'The Moon and 2½p', is set in the south seas.
9 March 1973
The musical guests are The Pattersons, Roy Castle and Anne Murray. Eric wears a wig to impress a lady. Ernie decides he needs a new partner. He also decides to take up directing and directs his new movie 'Call of the Yukon'.
16 March 1973
The musical guests are The Black and White Minstrels, George Hamilton IV and Nana Mouskouri. Eric decides to go on the road and Ernie introduces 'The Sooty Show'. Eric and Ernie celebrate Nana's appearance and finish singing "Mame".
23 March 1973
The musical guests are Alan Price and Georgie Fame, Peter Cushing and Wilma Reading. Eric has an autograph book and Ernie reads excerpts from Charles Dickens. Peter Cushing turns up wanting to be paid.
27 September 1974
The musical guest is Wilma Reading. Eric wants to be taken seriously. Eric and Ernie participate on Mastermind and then reminisce about their time in cubs. Ernie tricks André Previn into coming onto the show, something that André regrets.
4 October 1974
The musical guests are Wilma Reading and Anita Tibbles. Ernie starts the show but he some pains in his body. Eric and Ernie are silent on the art of good conversation. Ernie is looking for an exotic holiday.
11 October 1974
The musical guests are The Syd Lawrence Orchestra and Wilma Reading. Eric decides to become a pop star. He is in hospital after having plastic surgery on his nose. Ernie gets a secretary, who he fancies. Eric is determined to stop it.
18 October 1974
The music guest is Wilma Reading. Eric is suffering with laryngitis and does the opening using a tape recorder. Eric and Ernie do some wine tasting. Eric gets ready for an interview on the BBC about his writing.
25 October 1974
The musical guest is Wilma Reading. Ernie tries to play a practical joke on Eric, unsuccessfully. Eric and Ernie appear on a chat show to talk about morals. Eric gets a good review and Ernie is not happy as he wasn't mentioned.
1 November 1974
The musical guest is Wilma Reading. Ernie is tries to sing "I'm WIshing" with Eric as the echo. Eric especially is worried about getting old. Ernie's play is called 'The Plantation of Passion' starring June Whitfield as Muriel.
25 December 1975
The musical guests are Diane Solomon, Brenda Arnau, Des O'Connor and Diana Rigg. Eric and Ernie go to the psychiatrist. Des O'Connor has trouble singing. Diana Rigg stars as Nell Gwynne in Ernie's latest play called 'Nell Gwynne'.
7 January 1976
The musical guests are The Vernons and Gilbert O'Sullivan. Ernie starts off dancing and Eric begins by supporting him. Eric and Ernie are a pair of nannies taking a break. Ernie's latest play is called "The Legend of Dick Turpin".
21 January 1976
The musical guests are Tammy Jones and Frankie Vaughan. Ernie is upset as his wife has left him. Eric and Ernie are on 'The Sky At Night' and then join The Harpenden Hot Shots. Michele Dotrice is in Ernie's play 'The Handyman and M'Lady'.
11 February 1976
The musical guests are The Spinners and Lena Zavaroni. Eric brings out a statue of Ernie. Eric and Ernie are interviewed about the British sausage. They do a song and dance with Lena. Ernie is worried that people think that he is a miser.
10 March 1976
The musical guests are Kenny Ball and His Jazzmen, The Geraldine Yates Dancers and Jackie Darnell. Ernie opened the show dressed in a kilt. Eric goes to the Chemist shop. Ernie's latest play is 'The Lives of a Bengal Lancer'.
24 March 1976
The musical guests are Norman Percival, The Karlins, Vincent Zarra and The Geraldine Yates Dancers. Eric decides to quit show business. Ernie runs an antique shop. Eric and Ernie do some sunbathing.
19 April 1976
Ernie is made a Freedom Of The City type person. Other sketches include 'Eric Wants to Become a British Citizen', 'The Calculator Shop', 'Making Breakfast To The Stripper', 'The Bank Holdup', and 'A Lady from a Well known Women's Magazine Wants To Interview Ernie'. There is music from special guests Champagne and Diane Soloman.
8 April 1970
The musical guest is Nina (van Pallandt). Eric uses the opportunity to practise his French and they accompany Nina as she sings. Ernie tries to sell Eric a pair of binoculars and Eric takes up ventriloquism.
25 December 1973
The musical guests are John Hanson, Hannah Gordon and The New Seekers. Eric surprises the Ernie with the new years honours list. Ernie's play is called 'Napoleon and Josephine' with Vanessa Redgrave as Empress Josephine.
25 December 1976
The musical guests are The Nolans, Marian Montgomery and Elton John. Eric and Ernie play a pair of game pieces. The play is 'Mademoiselle from I'm-In-Tears', which is set in Paris during World War I.
25 December 1977
The musical guests are Angharad Rees and Elton John. Elton John has trouble getting correct directions. Eric and Ernie move house. Ernie's play is called 'Cyrano de Bergerac' and stars Francis Matthews and Penelope Keith.
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