John Cleese: This ruthless concentration on one's self is a successful irritant widely practiced by women. A friend of mine once demonstrated this to me at a large party. He stood in the middle of the room and said very loudly, "The trouble with women is that they always take things personally." Four women immediately replied, "Well I Don't."
Flight Attendant: Hang on, there's someone going into the washroom. Wait, he's in, he's in.
Bored Pilot: Please return to your seats and fasten you safety belts immediately.
Teddy: What animal makes the noise, "meow?"
Mrs.Maurice: A car?
Teddy: Nearly! Ca... ca... ca...
Mrs.Maurice: Ca... ca... bus?
Teddy: No. Ca... ca...
Teddy: No, no! Ca... ca... ca...
Mrs.Maurice: Ca... ca... ca... MOTOR TORPEDO BOAT!
Teddy: NO, NO, NO! Ha, ha, ha... bad luck, Mrs. Morris, jolly good try. No, Mrs. Morris, what ANIMAAAAAAL... ha, ha... makes the noise "meow?"
Mrs.Maurice: Oh, that's easy. A cat.
Teddy: A what?
Mrs.Maurice: A cat!
Teddy: Then why did you say "motor torpedo boat?"
Mrs.Maurice: I'M 943!
Bored Pilot: Please find the emergency spill in the washroom at the back and release it!
Bored Pilot: But do not unfasten your safety belt!
Flight Attendant: That's got 'em back to their seats.
Bored Pilot: The emergency spill must be released!
Bored Pilot: But do not leave your seats!
Bored Pilot: Do not panic!
Bored Pilot: Tea will be served.
Bored Pilot: Inflate your lifejackets!
Bored Pilot: And extinguish all cigarettes!
Bored Pilot: Please remove the luggage from the racks above your heads and please it on the other side of the aircraft.
Bored Pilot: Except for hand luggage...
Bored Pilot: Which you should sit on!
John Cleese: Why would you want to watch this? It's a costume thing.