MOVIEmeter
SEE RANK
Up 4,950 this week

Five the Hard Way (1969)

M  -  Action | Sport  -  May 1969 (USA)
1.6
Your rating:
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 -/10 X  
Ratings: 1.6/10 from 1,327 users  
Reviews: 30 user | 5 critic

Motorcycle racer Rommel seeks vengeance against JC, a madman who murdered the sidehacker's fiancee.

Director:

Writers:

(story),
0Check in
0Share...

On Disc

at Amazon

User Lists

Related lists from IMDb users

a list of 12 titles
created 06 Jul 2011
 
a list of 12 titles
created 04 Sep 2011
 
a list of 202 titles
created 17 Sep 2011
 
a list of 111 titles
created 01 Apr 2012
 
a list of 146 titles
created 20 May 2013
 

Related Items


Connect with IMDb


Share this Rating

Title: Five the Hard Way (1969)

Five the Hard Way (1969) on IMDb 1.6/10

Want to share IMDb's rating on your own site? Use the HTML below.

Take The Quiz!

Test your knowledge of Five the Hard Way.

Videos

Photos

Learn more

People who liked this also liked... 

Comedy
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 4.9/10 X  

American actress on vacation in Italy falls for her friend's married Italian lover.

Director: Mario Monicelli
Stars: Goldie Hawn, Giancarlo Giannini, Claudine Auger
Good Morning, World (1967–1968)
Comedy
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 7.3/10 X  

David Lewis and Larry Clarke are early morning disc jockeys in Los Angeles. Dave is happily married, while Larry thinks of himself as a ladies' man and "swinger." Billy deWolfe's ... See full summary »

Stars: Joby Baker, Ronnie Schell, Julie Parrish
Comedy | Drama | Music
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 7.2/10 X  

A blind man moves into his own apartment against the wishes of his overprotective mother, and befriends the freethinking young woman next door.

Director: Milton Katselas
Stars: Goldie Hawn, Edward Albert, Eileen Heckart
Action | Sci-Fi
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 1.7/10 X  

A Marine unit sent into an island base to save a professor, meets what they are trying to save the professor from and then its a rush to stay alive from the enemy.

Director: Griff Furst
Stars: Kristen Quintrall, Dario Deak, Jason S. Gray
Wild Rebels (1967)
Crime | Drama
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 1.9/10 X  

A stock car driver goes undercover as the wheel man for a motorcycle gang.

Director: William Grefe
Stars: Steve Alaimo, Willie Pastrano, John Vella
$ (1971)
Comedy | Crime | Drama
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 6.5/10 X  

A bank security expert plots with a call girl to rob three safety deposit boxes containing $1.5 million in cash belonging to three very different criminals from a high-tech security bank in Hamburg, Germany.

Director: Richard Brooks
Stars: Warren Beatty, Goldie Hawn, Gert Fröbe
Comedy | Western
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 5.6/10 X  

A female hustler is chasing after rich men, but becomes repeatedly mixed up with a suave con man and card shark through a series of misadventures before falling in love with him.

Director: Melvin Frank
Stars: George Segal, Goldie Hawn, Conrad Janis
Action | Adventure | Crime
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 1.7/10 X  

When a plane carrying the daughter of a millionaire crashes in an African jungle, two pilots set out to collect the reward. They discover that she has become the goddess of a primitive ... See full summary »

Director: Lewis D. Collins
Stars: George Reeves, Wanda McKay, Ralph Byrd
Cactus Flower (1969)
Certificate: M Comedy | Romance
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 7.2/10 X  

A dentist pretends to be married to avoid commitment, but when he falls for his girlfriend and proposes, he must recruit his lovelorn nurse to pose as his wife.

Director: Gene Saks
Stars: Walter Matthau, Ingrid Bergman, Goldie Hawn
Action | Horror | Sci-Fi
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 1.5/10 X  

When an oil company unwittingly unleashes a prehistoric shark from its icy prison, the Jurassic killer maroons a group of thieves and beautiful young female college students on an abandoned... See full summary »

Director: Brett Kelly
Stars: Emanuelle Carriere, Christine Emes, Celine Filion
Comedy | Drama | Romance
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 5.4/10 X  

A beautiful Russian ballerina falls in love with an American news correspondent. The KGB is most displeased and does everything it can to break them up.

Director: Robert Ellis Miller
Stars: Goldie Hawn, Hal Holbrook, Anthony Hopkins
Comedy | Musical | Mystery
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 1.9/10 X  

A group of swingin' teens take time out from having fun in the sun to try to foil a group of crooks searching for a stolen scroll.

Director: Lee Sholem
Stars: Tommy Kirk, Del Moore, Peter Duryea
Edit

Cast

Cast overview, first billed only:
...
Vince Rommel
Diane McBain ...
Rita
...
J.C.
Dick Merrifield ...
Luke
Claire Polan ...
Paisley
Edward Parrish ...
Nero
Michael Graham ...
Cooch
...
Crapout
Diane Tessier ...
Debbie
...
Dirty John (as Eric Cord)
Eric Lidberg ...
Tork
Ivy Ross ...
Mechanic
Joey Tessier ...
Billy
...
Jake
Tony Lorea ...
Announcer
Edit

Storyline

Motorcycle racer Rommel and his fiancée Rita become friendly with a biker gang led by the unstable J.C. When Rita is raped and murdered by J.C. in a jealous rage, Rommel gathers some biker pals and goes on a hunt for vengeance. Written by Marty McKee <mmckee@wkio.com>

Plot Summary | Plot Synopsis

Taglines:

HARD RIDERS! Mounted on Burning Steel! ... with only their leathers between THEM and HELL!

Genres:

Action | Sport

Certificate:

M | See all certifications »
Edit

Details

Country:

Language:

Release Date:

May 1969 (USA)  »

Also Known As:

The Side Hackers  »

Filming Locations:


Company Credits

Production Co:

 »
Show detailed on  »

Technical Specs

Runtime:

Sound Mix:

(Ryder Sound Services)

Color:

(Eastmancolor)

Aspect Ratio:

2.35 : 1
See  »
Edit

Did You Know?

Trivia

Directorial debut of Gus Trikonis. See more »

Frequently Asked Questions

This FAQ is empty. Add the first question.

User Reviews

A movie with no redeeming qualities

Some movies are badly made but somehow charming in their incompetence. Some movies are disturbing but thought-provoking. Some movies just plain stink, but are good for a laugh if you're sitting around with your buddies altering your brain chemistry with substances of varying degrees of legality.

Then there's "Sidehackers", starring Ross Hagen, the Budget Steve McQueen, who wears a ridiculous little hat, and races a motorcycle with a funny side car (the "sidehacking" of the title). Budget Steve also likes to frolic in the tall grass and grunt and gurgle and murmur with his adoring fiancee, the lovely Rita. But when B.S. gets on the wrong side of J.C. (Michael Pataki, who usually plays Cold-War-era Soviet bad guys of various types), he gets the beating of his life. As for Rita, ... well, I just would rather not talk about that. Anyway, Budget Steve vows revenge, and....

Oh, what's the point! This movie is so devoid of any meaning, it doesn't really even matter what happens next. Suffice to say that I've seen sick films, violent films, and gruesome films, but I've never seen anything as pointlessly nihilistic as this one. Sartre would be bummed out watching this movie!

Incredibly, Joel & the 'bots managed to make a side-splittingly funny MST300 episode out of this one. Guess it just goes to show you - existential nausea makes for great comedy!


14 of 17 people found this review helpful.  Was this review helpful to you?

Message Boards

Recent Posts
Non-MST3K/ Unedited Version? coolgamer167
Where the film was shot (and left for dead) mschmidtswim
How about a remake? bearbloke
available as part of the collection... ksf-2
No mention of Ross Hagen at the 2012 Oscars scottishvalkyrie
Discuss Five the Hard Way (1969) on the IMDb message boards »

Contribute to This Page

Create a character page for:
?