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Texas Across the River
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Reviews & Ratings for
Texas Across the River More at IMDbPro »

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12 out of 13 people found the following review useful:

you have to remember the times

Author: shipes_j from vernon florida
13 October 2006

the mid sixties...back before we were so culturally/politically correct...this movie wasn't ever meant to be correct anyway...it was a spoof of course and anyone who comments on it negatively without considering that needs some help.....Texas across the river is a signature film for dean....westerns that he loved so much...also a comedy which he was famous for...(many confirm that off camera he was far funnier than jerry lewis back in his earlier days)

Texas across the river is a perfect example of a spoof done in the sixties...and if you consider it as such you will find it to be excellent!....some have commented about joey bishop (jew) playing an Indian...well (hello) that is exactly why it works...it was meant to be tongue in cheek!...one should have little wonder as soon as the organ spits out a 60's rhythm and melody every time the indians are seen...or the surf sounding guitar also used in the soundtrack....I love this movie for what its worth....escapism....during a time (1966) of tragedy....the Vietnam war.

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9 out of 10 people found the following review useful:

A tongue in cheek spoof about everything that is a typical western

7/10
Author: bpocock-1 from Lucan, Canada
4 March 2006

You need to park your brains at the door, put your tongue in your cheek and fully engage your funny bone for this film. This spoof is just that a spoof on everything that you find in a typical western and Texan. There is cows, oil, calvary, natives (I seriously doubt if there is a genuine North American native in the cast), good and bad guys and girls (mostly erring toward the good side). Nobody and nothing is spared from the writers' wit. This film is just good fun and a good laugh. I seriously doubt if it would meet any of the more modern standards for tolerance to racial groups and consideration for their feelings but this was the 60's and things were just beginning to change. Watch and enjoy whenever you see it coming. Do expect too much and you'll enjoy it more.

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8 out of 10 people found the following review useful:

Painfully funny!

8/10
Author: spratt-8 from United States
15 October 2005

The first and perhaps, only time I saw this movie was a day or two after having hernia surgery in 1975. That viewing gave new meaning to the phrases "busting a gut" or "being in stitches." I couldn't stop watching despite the pain from the laughter and would love to see it again. It was silly but hilarious nonetheless. Who says movies have to be anything but? Then again, I was/am a big fan of the "Pink Panther" movies, too. As one other review stated, maybe I won't find it as funny the next time around, but I still chuckle remembering Peter Graves and his unintelligible military commands and Joey Bishop's facial expressions. It certainly can be watched with the entire family, and you can't say that about too many movies these days.

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8 out of 11 people found the following review useful:

Great Western Spoof

8/10
Author: gdlance from United Kingdom
22 October 2006

This is a great fun movie that was released during the mid sixties wave of western spoofs. It has some jokes which fall a bit flat with 40 years of distance, but all comedy has a very short shelf life. In fact, there are gags in this film that not only stand the test of time, they amaze me at how well written and ahead of there time they seem to be. I love the cavalry orders being unintelligible. I love the Indians not getting anything right. I love Joey Bishop. The writers were very hip to western clichés, and took some brilliant unexpected turns with the script. It may not be a perfect movie, but if you love a good western spoof, then this is a great movie! Uh - ruhr - hur!

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8 out of 11 people found the following review useful:

So funny

10/10
Author: Lilibetp from east orange, nj
30 September 2003

I remember seeing this the first time when I was about 12. I nearly passed out from laughing so hard. Maybe it's not highbrow comedy, but in my opinion, it's still one of the funniest movies ever made. I especially enjoy Joey Bishop's "Indian" character. Watch it with your kids.

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9 out of 13 people found the following review useful:

HILARIOUS

Author: Big Movie Fan from England
23 February 2002

I'm not a big fan of most Western movies but I do enjoy comedy and as this was a comedy Western I found myself enjoying it.

As with most comedy movies, I am reluctant to give details about any of the scenes because if I were to tell you now then you wouldn't find them funny once you watch the film.Let's just say that Dean Martin (as Sam Hollis) and Joey Bishop (as Kronk) make quite a team. In fact everyone involved in the movie provides plenty of laughs. Everyone is playing a total buffoon.

If you don't like Westerns but do enjoy comedies then I strongly recommend this movie.

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7 out of 10 people found the following review useful:

Actually hilarious!

8/10
Author: fine_ass_white_boy_39307 from United States
10 January 2008

I generally hate westerns because they bore me to death within seconds. But I started watching this movie with my father, who loves westerns, and I actually never got bored watching it. It kept my interest the whole time and constantly made me laugh. I didn't give it a 10 because of some of the "editing" practices they had so long ago but other than that it's a great movie.

I couldn't believe how well the writers were back then. To be able to come up with such comedy so simple and so fluid without having to make it "stupid" funny, like most of the comedies we make now, it's very refreshing and amazing to see.

A+ movie.

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7 out of 10 people found the following review useful:

Breezy, Hilarious; a Classic Romantic Comedy Western

8/10
Author: silverscreen888
23 July 2005

Don Andre de Baldasare was set to marry Pheobe Ann Naylor of Louisiana; after an affair of honor goes wrong, he has to flee across the river, into the wilds of Texas. Once arrived, he meets encounters Sam Hollis and his Indian sidekick, the Karonkawa Indian, Kronk, who are transporting rifles to the town of Moccasin Flats. Don Andrea rescues an Indian maiden, Lonetta, uses Spanish skills to tame longhorns, becomes Sam's rival for Phoebe's affections, heads off a band of angry Comahces and runs continually from the cavalry (who have come to Moccasin Flats to celebrate Texas' statehood but mostly charge after him in gallant groups). At the end of the film, the man Sam calls "Baldy" saves the town and also gets his girl--but which one wins him? In this cheerful and frequently hilarious screenplay, Alain Delon is very funny and understated as Don Baldasare, Dean Martin is a bit too-old as Sam Hollis perhaps but shows his excellent comedic timing in the likable role. Rosemary Forsyth is vivacious and very pretty as Phoebe Ann, Southern accent and all; Peter Graves and Andrew Prince lead the cavalry, to whom Graves continually issues orders such as "To the rur, har!" which no one understands any more than they can penetrate Kronk's Indian sayings, delivered deadpan and rather beautifully by Joey Bishop. Others in the large cast include Tina Aumont as the Indian girl, Michael Ansara as the Indian chief pursuing them, and Linden Chiles as his physically- inept son, Stuart Anderson, Roy Barcroft, George Wallace, Don Beddoe,.Kelly Thordsen, Nora Marlowe, and John Harmon. Director Michael Gordon kept the action and the laughs coming despite much of the film being filmed out-of-doors. the bright cinematography was supplied by veteran Russell Metty, the script by "Maverick" TV series alumnus Wells Root and Harold Greene, and the art direction was done by William D. DeCinces and Alexander Golitzen. Set decorations were supplied by John McCarthy Jr. and  James Redd; the vivid costume designs were created by Helen Colvig and Rosemary Odell. This is a personal favorite of mine as a writer, breezy in dialogue and attractively colorful and often amusing. I recommend it for repeated viewing, for its spaciousness and its intelligent comedy, its style and its infectious and fantasy-free good humor.

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4 out of 5 people found the following review useful:

God, I love this movie!

10/10
Author: Cards_fan from United States
8 November 2007

I saw this movie at the theatre as a kid and, thanks to regular television airings, multiple times through the years. I practically have the film memorized. And yet, I bust a gut laughing every time I see it to this day. There are so many memorable scenes and lines that will immediately bring a smile to anyone's face who has seen it; "Texas isn't even a state, how big can it be?", "The coward attacked him from the rear", the slapping scenes, the arrow in the rear, Joey Bishop as an Indian, Rosemary Forsyth in a wet blanket, "No Comanche is a friend of mine", that '60s guitar music whenever the Comanches are around, "Only read Kronk", and the oft quoted "ARUHROAR HAR!". Simply put, this film is funny. It's a horrible injustice that this film has not yet received a studio DVD release. I long to see this film again in a wide screen presentation without the awful pan and scan.

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Mildly funny Western farce

6/10
Author: vincentlynch-moonoi from United States
12 February 2013

*** This review may contain spoilers ***

Dean Martin liked making Westerns, and he made some that were quite good -- "Rio Bravo" (of course), "The Sons Of Katie Elder", and "Five Card Stud". And then there were a couple that were ringers, and I always felt this was one of those. So, it was interesting to watch it again after not seeing it for quite a while. By the way, it's clear that several of our reviewers are Dean Martin fans...nothing wrong with that...I'm one, too...but that shouldn't color a review of the quality of a film.

One thing we have to get out of the way from the start is that this film isn't politically correct. It makes a mockery of Indians (who, of course, are played by Whites in makeup). But it also makes fun of Texans, and Europeans, and the "town folk", and the military, and...well, just about anybody in the plot.

As to plot...well, it's a cute idea, and the film has its moments...but not 101 minutes of memorable moments.

In terms of performances, Dean Martin plays...Dean Martin...which is pretty much always enjoyable, though this particular role certainly wouldn't have put him in contention for an Academy Award. Alain Delon plays the European, and does nicely. Rosemary Forsyth is fine as Dean's love interest. Joey Bishop is rather funny as the deadpan Kronk the Indian. Peter Graves has a thankless job as a military captain. It's always nice to see Michael Ansara as the Indian chief...though he is actually from Syria. And Tina Aumont is rather flat as the Indian girl.

It's reasonably funny, but not one of Dean's best efforts.

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