A modern-day updating of the Dracula legend that finds Steven, a good-looking American hero devastated by the death of his girlfriend, wandering through Europe and looking for happiness. A ... See full summary »
A family driving through a small town gets lost and winds up at a backwoods shack managed by Torgo, who takes care of it while The Master is away. The Master worships Manos, an evil deity, and he also wears a neat cape. When Torgo lets the family stay, The Master awakens and does mean stuff like burning off Torgo's hand and sicking his dog on the family pet. Meanwhile, The Master's wives wrestle for his favor. Written by
Jeremy Yuenger <firstname.lastname@example.org>
Okay. This is officially the worst movie ever made. Not because it's poorly done, because there are movies, like "Monster A-Go-Go", that are more poorly conceived, acted, directed, filmed, and edited. But "Manos" stands out because it is so incomprehensibly bad. It is SO bad that it is hard to imagine it was done by accident. It often seems like they film is supposed to be bad, and that the director is actually brilliantly creating a horrible film, because this kind of badness doesn't usually come from apathy or a lack of talent and money. This is worse.
The film is also very icky and very dull. Almost nothing happens (certainly not anything interesting) and if you survive the first ten minutes of driving around the countryside you'll just want everyone in the film to die.
However, because this movie is so brilliantly and incredibly bad, I suggest everyone watch it just to know it. Everyone should see "Citizen Kane" because it is the watermark for all good movies. Everyone should see "Manos" for the same reason. It puts all other bad movies to shame. I do suggest though, that it be watched ONLY as the MST3K version, since the team does a good job riffing the film. Even they seem to be too caught up in the film's reeking badness at times that they are just stunned, but they still do a good job. I also doubt you would find a regular version of this movie, since I doubt anyone would be crazy enough to have one.
Interestingly, the guy who plays the mean, stupid, and totally useless husband wrote, directed, and produced the film, and the guy who plays "The Master" did the art direction. They both failed in all their work. No one in this movie has ever done anything else. Thank God.
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