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Legendary outlaw of the Old West Jesse James, on the run from Marshal MacPhee, hides out in the castle of Baron Frankenstein's granddaughter Maria, who proceeds to transform Jesse's slow-witted pal Hank into a bald zombie, which she names Igor. Written by
Marty McKee <firstname.lastname@example.org>
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Dr. Rudolph Frankenstein:
Maria, you've already caused the death of three children and violated the graves of others just to make the experiments.
Dr. Maria Frankenstein:
My, you're a humanitarian! You should have stayed in Europe and given pink pills to sweet old ladies.
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I've always thought that there should be awards given out to players who manage to trundle through an impossibly bad film while keeping a straight face through all the hokey dialog and situations. I propose a group award be given to the cast of Jesse James Meets Frankenstein's Daughter.
The title alone should tell you how bad it is. In fact Jesse as played by John Lupton doesn't even meet the Baron's daughter, he meets in fact a pair of grandchildren, Narda Onyx and Stefan Schnabel.
Now how did all this occur you ask? It seems as though Lupton is fleeing from the disastrous Northfield, Minnesota raid in which his gang was pretty well decimated. Jesse managed to make it all the way to the Arizona desert with another of his gang, 6'5" Cal Bolder.
I read a little of Bolder's biography. In addition to his height, he sported a 52" chest and a set of biceps to make Hercules drool. Bolder gets wounded when another outlaw betrays them and that sends Jesse in search of a doctor.
So who do they find, but the Frankensteins who've fled Europe because the family name is somewhat tarnished and have set up experimenting in the Arizona desert in a village inhabited mostly with Mexican people. The Frankensteins start experimenting on the populace and the place becomes deserted which is how Lupton and Bolder find it.
Well I have to tell you that she takes one look at the wounded Bolder and decides he'll make a perfect subject. The way she eyes him, not only will he do her killing for her, but she's thinking great big man toy in the off hours.
A whole lot of people die in this one, either at Jesse's hands or at the monster's hands before the film ends. But this unbelievably bad horror film is so deliciously campy it has an honored place as a classic of its kind.
And the cast not only kept a straight face, but served the audience with the biggest slice of ham in 1966.
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