The Dick Van Dyke Show (TV Series 1961–1966) Poster


Episode List


Season 5

15 Sep. 1965
Coast to Coast Big Mouth
Laura accidentally spills the beans on a nationally televised talk show that Alan Brady is bald.
22 Sep. 1965
A Farewell to Writing
Harvey Bellman, a guy Rob once encouraged to write, finally finishes his book and sends Rob and Laura a copy. The incident leaves Rob envious over never finishing his own book. He then dedicates himself to the task but finds himself distracted by anything and everything. Laura finally has enough and sends him off to Lake Pushneck where Harvey has availed Rob his own personal get-away cabin in which to work. Will the isolation and change of scenery enable Rob to write? That's the question.
29 Sep. 1965
Uhny Uftz
Rob, Buddy, and Sally are working late on the script for the Alan Brady Show. When Buddy and Sally are out of the room getting coffee, Rob sees what he thinks is a flying saucer hovering outside the window of their office. He also hears the saucer utter the mysterious phrase, "Uhny Uftz." After an embarrassing attempt to report the saucer to the authorities, Rob becomes convinced that it was just an illusion caused by fatigue -- until the saucer and its puzzling phrase reappear during another late night writing session.
6 Oct. 1965
The Ugliest Dog in the World
Rob, Buddy and Sally have an unusual challenge in writing this week's script. The show's guest is a not a comedienne but a dramatic actress, and one that is not human but canine, namely a dog named Pally. They are having problems coming up with a suitable idea for a sketch. Rob thinks he's figured out an angle, one that has been done before but probably not in canine form. As Pally is considered a beautiful and intelligent dog, she would be Eliza Doolittle in their version of Pygmalion. To pull the skit off, they would have to find the ugliest, stupidest dog in the ...
13 Oct. 1965
No Rice at My Wedding
Laura has just read about Clark Rice in the newspaper. The name Clark Rice evokes strong emotions in both Rob and Laura as the man who won and almost won Laura. The story... After Rob and Laura had become serious about each other, Laura was crowned "Bivouac Baby" at Camp Crowder, the title which also came with an obligation to be raffled off for a date. The winner of the raffle was Cpl. Clark Rice. Clark ended up being attracted to Laura, and Laura in turn admitted that she had a good time with Clark on their date. After some convincing by Clark that she should know ...
20 Oct. 1965
Draw Me a Pear
Even though he agrees to do it, Rob is less than enthusiastic about taking an evening art class with Laura. However, Rob ends up having a great time and is the star pupil of the class, which is taught by a young, bohemian woman named Valerie Ware. Since Rob and Laura didn't identify themselves as husband and wife and as Rob was not wearing his wedding ring, Laura believes that Valerie is interested in Rob as more than a student by the extra attention he got in class and her want for him to take private lessons, jointly with her and a renowned artist. Laura doesn't ...
27 Oct. 1965
The Great Petrie Fortune
Rob and Laura attend the reading of the will left by Rob's elderly Uncle Hezekiah. After some fairly generous financial bequests are given to Rob's relatives, they are ushered out of the room, and Rob and Laura are shown a short film of Uncle Hezekiah informing Rob that he's left him his old roll-top desk; Hezekiah then sings him a chorus of "Me and My Shadow," which is supposed to be a clue to a "treasure" Hezekiah claims is hidden in the desk.
3 Nov. 1965
Odd But True
As Rob naps one afternoon, Ritchie and his friend Freddie connect the freckles on Rob's back. Laura and Millie notice that the pattern resembles the Liberty Bell, so Rob reluctantly decides to follow Millie's suggestion that Rob submit it to "Odd but True," which publicizes unusual stunts and physical phenomena and in exchange pays the person responsible a $500 prize.
10 Nov. 1965
Viva Petrie
Rob and Laura's former short term live-in immigrant maid, Maria, telephones asking for a favor. She would like Rob to help her Spanish boyfriend, Manuel Rodriguez, find a job, which will be no easy task as Manuel's primary profession is as bullfighter. When Manuel arrives at Rob and Laura's door, he has the misconception much like Maria did before him that his job is as their live-in housekeeper. He tells them that he left Spain and bullfighting in disgrace as a coward, and needs to regain his dignity before he can marry Maria. Regardless, Rob and Laura have to tell ...
17 Nov. 1965
Go Tell the Birds and the Bees
Ritchie's been giving lectures to the other children at school about human reproduction - fanciful stories that prompt his teacher to summon Rob and Laura to discuss the matter. After having a talk with Ritchie, the Petries feel they've handled the problem admirably and that no more tales will be told, but they soon hear of the lectures continuing. Finally Rob and Laura sit Ritchie down to find out what's up with him.
24 Nov. 1965
Body and Sol
In a story told mostly as a flashback, Rob recalls his days as "Pitter Patter Petrie," the middleweight champion of Camp Crowder, Missouri during his Army days. He also recounts how his then-fiancé Laura was deeply worried about Rob's defense of his title against a well-regarded challenger, even going so far as to suggest that Rob "take a dive."
8 Dec. 1965
See Rob Write, Write Rob Write
Laura has brought home a series of fantasy illustrations drawn by Charlie, the seventeen year old son of Laura's local butcher. Both Laura and Rob think they're good. Instead of buying any of them, Laura thinks that the entire series would make a good children's book, and she wants Rob to approach his friend, Ollie Wheelright, a children's book publisher, to see if he would be interested in publishing the drawings. Laura also thinks that the drawings might be sold more easily if there was a story accompanying them. Rob thinks that she wants him to write the story, but...
15 Dec. 1965
You're Under Arrest
Rob is questioned by the police regarding a fracas in a barroom where a woman was injured. Rob finds himself in a jam when his accounting of his whereabouts during the fight doesn't hold water.
29 Dec. 1965
Fifty-Two, Forty-Five or Work
Mel comes into the writers' office with news that Alan has decided the show will go into summer reruns, meaning that the staff is off on summer vacation - or technically laid off - for two months. Although happy about the news, Rob has a sense of déjà vu to precisely nine years earlier when he just joined the writing staff of the show. Then, Mel came in with the exact same news. Sally and Buddy were ecstatic as it allowed them to take other temporary writing jobs. Rob, being relatively new in the business, had no such offers, and, without telling his colleagues due to...
5 Jan. 1966
Who Stole My Watch
Laura gives Rob an expensive watch at a birthday party attended by several family friends. But when the watch goes missing shortly after the party, Rob reluctantly concludes that one of his close friends may be a thief.
19 Jan. 1966
I Do Not Choose to Run
Rob decides to speak at a public meeting to oppose a new shopping center development on the site of an existing park. Impressed by Rob's speech and by him as a man, Doug, who is his friend and a current city councilor, and Mr. Howard, a businessman who works on a committee for better local government, want Rob to run for city council. Once Rob and Laura recover from the shock of the request, they decide that Rob will at least speak further to them about the possibility, with him leaning more toward running. At the planning meeting with Doug and Mr. Howard among others...
26 Jan. 1966
The Making of a Councilman
Rob enters into his public speaking engagements. At a ladies club, he meets his political opponent Lincoln Goodheart for the first time. Though Lincoln is short, mousy and with a nasal speaking voice, he is bright and extremely well-informed about everything. Rob, on the other hand, is tall, nervously awkward and politically ignorant but with a nice poster. The more Rob learns about Lincoln the more he finds himself inadequate for the job - but does the public want a well-informed leader or a charming figurehead?
2 Feb. 1966
The Curse of the Petrie People
Rob's parents bestow upon Laura a Petrie family heirloom -- a huge, garish gold brooch in the shape of the United States, with a jewel for each city where a member of the family was born. Laura reluctantly accepts the brooch to keep the peace, but her embarrassment over it turns to horror when she accidentally drops it into the garbage disposal.
9 Feb. 1966
The Bottom of Mel Cooley's Heart
Alan publicly berates Mel in front of the entire cast and crew for a small gaffe that made Alan look unintentionally comical. Rob and Buddy, who witnessed the incident, believe that Alan's actions were uncalled for. What's worse, they can't believe that Mel just stood there and did nothing to defend himself. Rob hears through the grapevine that Alan may find another producer to replace Mel, despite Mel being pseudo-family. Rob, Sally and even Buddy believe that what Mel needs is some belief in himself and some backbone to stand up to Alan. With some alcohol in his ...
16 Feb. 1966
Remember the Alimony
When Ritchie brings out a secret document of Rob and Laura's while Buddy and Sally are over for dinner, Rob and Laura, who were initially not going to divulge the nature of the document, decide to reveal that it is their divorce papers issued by Mexico. The story... They had been married for about three months, Rob was still in the army and they were stationed in a small Texas border town called Anchor. To get away from the problems that living in Anchor was causing on their marriage, they decided to take a romantic getaway across the border into El Diablo, Mexico. ...
23 Feb. 1966
Dear Sally Rogers
Sally is appearing on the Stevie Parsons Show for the umpteenth time, but unlike the other times, she's nervous if only because she is running out of funny stories to tell. She loses her nervousness when she comes up with a story idea based on a suggestion from Buddy and the latest funny but bad incident in her long struggling relationship with Herman Glimscher and his mother: she's going to do a mock television commercial advertising herself as a potential girlfriend/wife. The gag may end up being funny, but Rob is worried that it will result in every crackpot man in...
2 Mar. 1966
Buddy Sorrell Man and Boy
We find out Buddy's full name.
9 Mar. 1966
Bad Reception in Albany
Rob and Laura are in Albany to attend the wedding of Laura's cousin Edabeth. Laura is the matron of honor, while Rob is an usher. Rob sends Laura off to the church alone early as he, on order from Alan, has to stay in their hotel room to watch a fashion show on television to view the work of someone Alan is contemplating hiring as an on-air partner. Despite Laura's concerns, Rob figures he has plenty of time as it's now seven thirty, the show starts at eight o'clock ending at eight thirty, and the wedding ceremony starts at nine o'clock. The evening doesn't end up ...
23 Mar. 1966
Talk to the Snail
Rob, Sally, and Buddy lose the script and have to dig through the outside trash container. Rob finds a memo from Alan Brady that seems like he wants to fire one writer. Rob starts looking for another job so he is the one cut.
6 Apr. 1966
A Day in the Life of Alan Brady
The entire office, including the writers' room, is getting a face-lift in preparation for a film crew who are shooting a television documentary on Alan's life. Wanting to put himself in as good a light as possible, Alan wants to stage any of the events filmed, including one at Rob's house with him having an impromptu, casual coffee with his head writer and his family. The coffee is to show that he mingles with the "little people". After Rob agrees, he remembers that he already has a previous engagement at their house for that scheduled time, that engagement being ...
13 Apr. 1966
Obnoxious, Offensive, Egomaniac, Etc.
On weeks where they are feeling especially frustrated with Alan's dictatorial nature, Rob, Buddy and Sally type in disparaging remarks about Alan in their copy of the week's script, inking out those insults in the official copy that eventually goes to Alan. As they and Laura are in the office getting dressed to go to an opening night of a new play - tickets for which were provided by Alan - Sally comes to the realization that none of the three inked out the insults in this week's script that went to Alan. They feel they have no other choice but to try and break into ...
20 Apr. 1966
The Man from My Uncle
It's the beginning of a three day weekend for Rob,and he's in a giddy mood because of it. His mood is heightened when Mr. Phillips, a federal agent, stops by wanting to use their house as a stake-out post to watch the goings-on of their neighbor, Mr. Gerard. It isn't Mr. Gerard they are after, but his criminal nephew. Laura doesn't really like the idea of their house being used for a stake-out, but Rob thrives on the idea of a little excitement. Believing it being for the public good, they agree. The agent they send is Harry Bond. While Laura generally feels nervous ...
27 Apr. 1966
You Ought to Be in Pictures
Leslie Merkle, one of Rob's old army buddies who now makes novelty movies, calls Rob. Rob is afraid Les is going to want him to write a script for him. So Rob is surprised when Les wants him to star in one of his movies. It is an experimental movie about the life of real life pseudo-celebrity Rita Rivera, a European woman renowned for her many lovers. The movie is to be shot from Rita's perspective, meaning the camera will play Rita, with all the men's parts played by those who work in that actual profession to add a sense of realism. For example, Rob is to play a ...
4 May 1966
Love Thy Other Neighbor
Purely out of coincidence, Mary Jane Staggs née Gibbs, a friend of Laura's from their grammar school days, moves in next door to the Petries with her husband, Fred Staggs. When Millie first meets Mary Jane at the Petrie house, she feels like a third wheel as Laura and Mary Jane are so preoccupied about catching up after all these years. Millie feels slighted and jealous of Mary Jane's friendship with Laura. Millie tries to get Jerry to feel the same way about Rob and his resulting friendship with Fred, which he refuses to do until he finds out that Rob, who had four ...
11 May 1966
Long Night's Journey Into Day
The Petrie and Helper families are heading off on an overnight camping and fishing trip. The only person not going is Laura, who is nursing a cold. Laura doesn't want to admit that she is nervous about staying alone in the house. As such, she even welcomes the company of Herschel, the Helper's myna bird. Millie, who came to the conclusion that the camping trip would be no fun without Laura, comes back to spend the evening with her best friend, which doesn't help as their collective jitteriness in being alone increases as each feeds off of the nervousness of the other....
25 May 1966
The Gunslinger
To extract Rob's impacted wisdom tooth, Jerry needs to place him under a general anesthetic. Rob is concerned about the procedure if only because he needs to get back to work to write a western sketch for the show which is due that day. While under the effects of the anesthetic, Rob begins not only to dream subconsciously about the sketch, but also place himself, his family and friends in that western setting within his dream. Gunless Sheriff Rob wants to rid the west of all the bad guys, with Big Bad Brady, a former associate of his when Rob was a gunslinger, at the ...
1 Jun. 1966
The Last Chapter
Rob and Laura decide to put aside all else for one evening after Rob tells Laura that he has finished the manuscript for his book. Laura will read the manuscript while a nervous Rob watches her reading, he trying to gage her reaction. Their plans change when Laura refuses to let him watch. As Laura starts reading, she is excited to learn that the book is the story of their life, and she begins to reminisce about the situations written. Regardless of Laura's reaction, Rob is equally as anticipatory about the reaction of the publisher to whom he sent the manuscript.

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See also

Episode Cast | Rated Episodes (by date / vote)| TV Schedule

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