MOVIEmeter
SEE RANK
Down 177 this week

Don't Go Near the Water (1957)

Approved  |   |  Adventure, Comedy, Romance  |  December 1957 (USA)
6.3
Your rating:
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 -/10 X  
Ratings: 6.3/10 from 413 users  
Reviews: 5 user

On a small island in the South Pacific, the Navy's P.R. department is spending WWII without getting near a ship. Lt. Max Siegal is the Second in command to a clueless Commanding Officer who... See full summary »

Director:

0Check in
0Share...

IMDb Picks: May

Visit our IMDb Picks section to see our recommendations of movies and TV shows coming out in May, sponsored by COVERGIRL.

Visit the IMDb Picks section

Related News

Anne Francis, 1930 - 2011
| MUBI
Anne Francis Dies
| PEOPLE.com

User Lists

Related lists from IMDb users

list image
a list of 377 titles
created 18 Sep 2011
 
a list of 19 titles
created 03 Mar 2013
 
a list of 1691 titles
created 02 Apr 2013
 
list image
a list of 51 titles
created 03 Jul 2013
 
a list of 3043 titles
created 10 months ago
 

Related Items

Connect with IMDb


Share this Rating

Title: Don't Go Near the Water (1957)

Don't Go Near the Water (1957) on IMDb 6.3/10

Want to share IMDb's rating on your own site? Use the HTML below.

Take The Quiz!

Test your knowledge of Don't Go Near the Water.

User Polls

Nominated for 2 Golden Globes. Another 2 wins & 3 nominations. See more awards »
Learn more

People who liked this also liked... 

The Americano (1955)
Adventure | Western
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 5.5/10 X  

An American working on a ranch in the Amazon comes up against a gang of Brazilian bandits.

Director: William Castle
Stars: Glenn Ford, Frank Lovejoy, Cesar Romero
Comedy
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 6.9/10 X  

This comedy-drama is partially a gentle satire on America's drive to change the world in the post-war years. One year after World War II, Captain Fisby is sent to the village of Tobiki in ... See full summary »

Director: Daniel Mann
Stars: Marlon Brando, Glenn Ford, Machiko Kyô
Drama | War
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 6.7/10 X  

In Argentina, the family man Julio Madariaga is the patriarch of his family and considers his farm the paradise on Earth. One of his daughters, Luisa Desnoyers, has married the Frenchman ... See full summary »

Director: Vincente Minnelli
Stars: Glenn Ford, Ingrid Thulin, Charles Boyer
Dear Heart (1964)
Comedy
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 7.3/10 X  

Single and alone, Evie arrives in New York for the annual Postmasters' convention. Staying at her hotel is a womanising salesman newly promoted to his marketing department and trying to ... See full summary »

Director: Delbert Mann
Stars: Glenn Ford, Geraldine Page, Angela Lansbury
The Gazebo (1959)
Comedy | Crime | Thriller
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 7/10 X  

TV writer Elliott Nash buries a blackmailer under the new gazebo in his suburban backyard. But the nervous man can't let the body rest there.

Director: George Marshall
Stars: Glenn Ford, Debbie Reynolds, Carl Reiner
Crime | Drama | Thriller
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 6.4/10 X  

When half a million dollars disappears from a doctor office's safe, the cops assigned to the burglary case, Joe and Pete, decide to find the money and keep it for themselves.

Director: Burt Kennedy
Stars: Glenn Ford, Elke Sommer, Rita Hayworth
Biography | Drama | Romance
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 6.5/10 X  

Poor health and alcoholism force Grover Cleveland Alexander out of baseball, but through his wife's faithful efforts, he gets a chance for a comeback and redemption.

Director: Lewis Seiler
Stars: Doris Day, Ronald Reagan, Frank Lovejoy
Drama
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 7.3/10 X  

A Korean War veteran's morphine addiction wreaks havoc upon his family.

Director: Fred Zinnemann
Stars: Don Murray, Eva Marie Saint, Anthony Franciosa
Western
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 5.5/10 X  

Confederate POWs escape a Union camp and make for the Mexico border chased by Union troops with both parties oblivious to the fact that peace was declared.

Directors: Phil Karlson, Roger Corman
Stars: Inger Stevens, Glenn Ford, Paul Petersen
Torpedo Run (1958)
War | Drama
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 6.4/10 X  

A submarine commander is forced to blow up a Japanese ship with prisoners.

Director: Joseph Pevney
Stars: Glenn Ford, Ernest Borgnine, Diane Brewster
Comedy | War
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 6.6/10 X  

Master Sgt. "Murph" Savage impersonates a fallen general in the hope of inspiring his fellow soldiers to bravely fight their way out of a Nazi ensnarement. He might succeed if he can avoid ... See full summary »

Director: George Marshall
Stars: Glenn Ford, Red Buttons, Taina Elg
Cry for Happy (1961)
Comedy | Romance
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 6/10 X  

U.S. Navy photographic team uses Tokyo geisha house as its home.

Director: George Marshall
Stars: Glenn Ford, Donald O'Connor, Miiko Taka
Edit

Cast

Cast overview, first billed only:
...
Lt. J.G. Max Siegel
Gia Scala ...
Melora Alba
...
Adam Garrett
...
Lt. Alice Tomlen
...
Gordon Ripwell
...
Lt. Cmdr. Clinton T. Nash
...
Deborah Aldrich
...
Ens. Tyson
...
Lt. Ross Pendleton
Mickey Shaughnessy ...
Farragut Jones
Howard Smith ...
Adm. Junius Boatwright
Romney Brent ...
Mr. Alba - Melora's Father
...
Janie
Jack Straw ...
Lt. Cmdr. Gladstone
Robert Nichols ...
Lt. Cmdr. Hereford
Edit

Storyline

On a small island in the South Pacific, the Navy's P.R. department is spending WWII without getting near a ship. Lt. Max Siegal is the Second in command to a clueless Commanding Officer who believes Sea Duty to be the worst punishment he can give one of his men. Siegal has to keep the foreign correspondents happy, keep his Commander out of trouble and figure out a way for one of the enlisted sailors to date the lady Lieutenant of his dreams - all while convincing a certain island schoolteacher that he's the man for her. Written by April M. Cheek <Aravis2713@aol.com>

Plot Summary | Add Synopsis

Taglines:

Funnier Than The Hilarious Book About The Navy Boys Who Made Almost Everything But Sea Duty! See more »


Certificate:

Approved | See all certifications »
Edit

Details

Country:

Language:

Release Date:

December 1957 (USA)  »

Also Known As:

Geh nicht zu nah ans Wasser  »

Company Credits

Show detailed on  »

Technical Specs

Runtime:

Sound Mix:

(Westrex Recording System)

Color:

(Metrocolor)

Aspect Ratio:

2.35 : 1
See  »
Edit

Did You Know?

Goofs

When Ensign Tyson (Russ Tamblyn)first proclaims he's an ensign, he is clearly wearing silver bars, the insignia of a lieutenant, junior grade. An ensign wears gold bars--known familiarly as "chocolate bars." See more »

Quotes

Lt. Ross Pendleton: [describing the running of the grunion] During this time of the year the slippery little creatures come up on the beach, stop, spawn, then go out to sea again.
Lt. Alice Tomlen: Sounds like some naval officers I know.
See more »

Connections

Referenced in The Money Pit (1986) See more »

Soundtracks

Anchors Aweigh
(uncredited)
Music by Charles A. Zimmerman and lyrics by Alfred Hart Miles
Heard as a theme
See more »

Frequently Asked Questions

This FAQ is empty. Add the first question.

User Reviews

 
The Funniest Service Comedy of WWII; Great Characters, Story
25 June 2005 | by See all my reviews

I rate William Brinkley's beautiful written and only slightly pretentious service comedy "Don't Go Near the Water" as the best satire to come out of WWII. There is nothing lightweight about his attempt here; he is writing from personal knowledge of this group of reporters about the hysteria, professionalism, patriotism, irresponsibility, hijinks and occasional hubris of the press who covered the War in the Pacific Theater-of-Operations. The head of the organization is a refugee from Wall Street, chrome-domed comedy genius Fred Clark, riding herd on a large group of bright, bored and nefarious group of minds who are looking to avoid duty or to do something that will shake up the world. Only two changes were made from the novel by Dorothy Kingsley's brilliant screenplay. One was to alter Max, the central character, from a big unattractive sort to handsome Glenn Ford; the other was to change the character played by Earl Holliman from a big handsome hunk to an ordinary- looking nice guy. One works; the other doesn't. But everything else, in my judgment, works like clockwork in this extremely memorable, funny and thought- filled narrative. Director Charles Walters kept the proceedings going professionally and well. The technical aspects of the movie are both good and usually so good they go unnoticed, because what matters in this story, I claim, is the characters and the actors who bring them to vibrant life. The storyline involved is simple. The correspondents get a Club built; Max handles one Farragut Jones, a foul-mouthed nightmare he helps create, by riding herd on him during personal appearances. He also baits Clark, his boos, and pursues a lovely island girl, played by Gia Scala, while facing five disruptions--an illicit liaison between an enlisted man and an officer, an obnoxious demanding journalist, a lovely female reporter who wants to see the shooting war up close, some visiting VIPs and Clark's interference in the challenge of building the Club which all upsets the dull daily routine of the newshawks. The large able cast is headed by Ford, Clark, Holliman, Anne Francis, A\Mary Wickes, Keenan Wynnn as the journalist, Eva Gabor as the female reporter, Mickey Shaughnessy as Farragut Jones, with Romney Brent as Scala's father, Jack Albertson and Charles Watts as the Representatives, Jeff Richards and Howard Smith. Bronislau Kaper supplied the music; the film produced a hit song. And when the atomic bomb is dropped on Japan, the film achieve a climax at a large bash, and a happy ending for Ford and Scala. The most hilarious and meaningful service comedy of which I have knowledge. its theme is really how men deal with responsibility, and everyone is memorable because the theme is so well- integrated with the War and its events. Kudos to William Brinkley for this absolute gem.


15 of 20 people found this review helpful.  Was this review helpful to you?

Message Boards

Recent Posts
Inspired famous Money Pit scene? apass
Farragut Jones nenue
Searching for Brinkley Estate sbrook
Discuss Don't Go Near the Water (1957) on the IMDb message boards »

Contribute to This Page

Create a character page for:
?