Desk Set (1957)
Bunny Watson: Have some tequila, Peg.
Peg Costello: I don't think I should. There are 85 calories in a glass of champagne.
Bunny Watson: I have a little place in my neighborhood where I can get it for 65.
[Richard gives Bunny a personality test]
Richard Sumner: Now what is the first thing you notice in a person?
Bunny Watson: Whether the person is male or female.
Bunny Watson: I don't smoke, I only drink champagne when I'm lucky enough to get it, my hair is naturally natural, I live alone... and so do you.
Richard Sumner: How do you know that?
Bunny Watson: Because you're wearing one brown sock and one black sock.
Bunny Watson: Just for kicks. You don't have to answer it if you don't want to. I mean, don't dwell on the question, but I warn you there's a trick in it: If six Chinamen get off a train at Las Vegas, and two of them are found floating face down in a goldfish bowl, and the only thing they can find to identify them are two telephone numbers - one, Plaza Oh-Oh-Oh-Oh-Oh, and the other, Columbus Oh-1492 - what time did the train get to Palm Springs?
Richard Sumner: Nine o'clock.
Bunny Watson: Now, would you mind telling me how you happened to get that?
Richard Sumner: Well, there are eleven letters in Palm Springs. You take away two Chinamen, that leaves nine.
Bunny Watson: You're a sketch, Mr. Sumner.
Richard Sumner: You're not so bad yourself.
[Sumner answers the phone while the girls are at a Christmas party]
Richard Sumner: Hello? Santa Claus's reindeer? Uh, why yes I can... let's see, there's Dopey, Sneezy, Grouchy, Happy, Sleepy, uh Rudolph, and Blitzen! You're welcome!
Richard Sumner: [watching the computer result on "Corfu", which is mistaken as "curfew"] What the devil is this?
Bunny Watson: [also having a look] It's the poem, "Curfew Shall Not Ring Tonight." Isn't that nice?
Bunny Watson: [reciting] "Cromwell will not come till sunset, and her lips grew strangely white... as she breathed the husky whisper, curfew must not a-ring tonight."
Miss Warriner: [while Bunny goes on] Mr. Sumner, what can I do?
Richard Sumner: Nothing. You know you can't interrupt her...
Richard Sumner: ...in the middle of a sequence.
Miss Warriner: Yes, but, Mr. Sumner...
Richard Sumner: Quiet! Just listen.
Bunny Watson: "She had listened while the judges read, without a tear or sigh, at the ringing of the curfew, Basil Underwood must die."
Richard Sumner: Uh, how long does this go on?
Bunny Watson: That old poem has about 80 stanzas to it.
Richard Sumner: Where are we now?
Bunny Watson: "She has reached the topmost ladder. O'er her hangs the great dark bell, awful is the gloom beneath her like the pathway down to hell. Lo, the ponderous tongue is swinging. 'Tis the hour of curfew now, and the sight has chilled her bosom, stopped her breath and paled her brow."
Bunny Watson: "Shall she let it ring? No, never! Flash her eyes with sudden light, as she springs and grasps it firmly...
[answers the phone]
Bunny Watson: ...curfew shall not ring tonight!"
Bunny Watson: They hung up. And I know another one! "Out she swung, far out, the city seemed a speck of light..."
Mr. Azae: You don't care whether you impress people or not, do you?
Richard Sumner: You wait until you get my bill. You'll be impressed.
Sylvia Blair: [telephone rings] Reference department, Miss Blair. Oh, yes, we've looked that up for you, and there are certain poisons which leave no trace, but it's network policy not to mention them on our programs.
Richard Sumner: You were late this morning.
Bunny Watson: I know, but it's all right - I brought a note from my mother.
Peg Costello: I could tell from the way he was lookin' at me that if I were any other kind of girl, it would've been the start of a beautiful romance.
Bunny Watson: More power to you! You're lonely, but more power to you!
Ruthie Saylor: [Talking about Richard Sumner as he tape measures the office] Do you think we're being redecorated?
Sylvia Blair: Does he look like an interior decorator to you?
Peg Costello: No. He looks like one of those men who suddenly switched to vodka!
Bunny Watson: [pointing to a large stuffed bunny Mike has] Aren't you going to introduce me to Harvey?
Bunny Watson: Oh, I remember what: my other bottle of champagne.
Peg Costello: If you take that champagne back to Legal, you won't even get another swallow.
Bunny Watson: That's right. Maybe I'd better drink it right here. Join me, Peg?
Peg Costello: Certainly. How does champagne go with Four Roses, Scotch, Martinis, and Bloody Marys?
Bunny Watson: Oh, fine. They're all the same base: alcohol.
Mike Cutler: [to Richard Sumner] I supposed I should have called first?
Richard Sumner: Yes, do that next time.
Bunny Watson: Did you invent something that carries the mail?
Ruthie Saylor: Are you sure you want this mistletoe right over the door?
Sylvia Blair: Certainly! Then if anything good drifts in we can grab him!
Sylvia Blair: What do you suppose it'll be like here next Christmas when we're gone? Do you think EMERAC will throw a party?
Ruthie Saylor: Oh, don't talk that way. It's bad luck to talk like that. It's Christmas!
Bunny Watson: It's Christmas.
Peg Costello: Well, if we do get canned, we won't be the only ones to lose our jobs because of a machine.