6 user 1 critic

You Know What Sailors Are (1954)

Approved | | Comedy | 4 November 1954 (USA)
A fun frolic involving a fake secret weapon (accidentally created during a drinking bout), naval bureaucracy, political maneuvering and the hareem and palace of the exotic eastern country of Agraria.





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Cast overview, first billed only:
President of Agraria
Lt. Sylvester Green
Sarah Lawson ...
Naunton Wayne ...
Captain Owbridge
Bill Kerr ...
Lt. Smart
Martin Miller ...
Prof. Hyman Pfumbaum
Captain Hamilton
Stanislaus Voritz of Smorznigov
Bryan Coleman ...
Lt. Comdr. Voles
Cyril Chamberlain ...
Stores Officer
Hal Osmond ...
Stores Petty Officer
Peter Arne ...
Sara Leighton ...
Jasmin (as Shirley Lorimer)


Lt. Sylvester Green is making his crooked way shipwards with a couple of naval colleagues after a night's drinking and along the way they collect an old pram and three brass balls from a pawnbroker's shop. Passing the foreign vessel Agraria on the dock they notice some welding equipment and decide to have some fun. They attach the junk to the Agraria and paint it naval grey. Next morning when Green unsteadily arises his commanding officer has noticed the mysterious new equipment and trying to avoid exposure Green identifies it confidently as a '998'. From then on things only get more confused as soon everyone in the navy wants to know why this foreign ship has more up-to-date radar than they do. Green is coincidentally seconded to the Agraria as a radar instructor and soon (through the magical power of coincidence) the Agrarians (and everyone else) believe it is a powerful secret weapon. Green is held prisoner in the rather pleasant environment of the Agrarian palace where the ... Written by Seán Ó Séaghdha

Plot Summary | Add Synopsis

Plot Keywords:

based on novel | See All (1) »


It's the most revealing comedy ever brought to blushing color by TECHNICOLOR! See more »




Approved | See all certifications »




Release Date:

4 November 1954 (USA)  »

Also Known As:

Endstation Harem  »

Company Credits

Show detailed on  »

Technical Specs

Sound Mix:

(Western Electric Recording)



Aspect Ratio:

1.37 : 1
See  »

Did You Know?


Referenced in An Evening with... Peter Rogers (2005) See more »


Ship Ahoy! (All The Nice Girls Love A Sailor)
Written by A.J. Mills and Bennett Scott
See more »

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User Reviews

ships ahoy for sailor boy vs 998
31 August 2007 | by (Australia) – See all my reviews

This movie was a great surprise! It has comedy & a good plot that unfolds unexpectedly. All in all, it's a quality production.

In the process it quietly cuts a satirical response to the layers of bureaucracy in most if not all countries of the world, in a very entertaining way! I watched it at 4.30am on Australia's Channel 2 ABC TV, while a government of the rich & powerful, soon to be a government no more it seems, is about to host a function for the even more rich & powerful! With all the appropriate fencing & prestige advantageous for themselves, announced in sensationalism & with more propaganda, almost as if an embodiment of "the emperor with no clothes" brought to life. With all the propaganda they have used to keep themselves rich in… while cutting the budgets of this TV channel I watched this on a day ago.

Yet another comment posted indicates this movie is not easily available elsewhere! "998" would be right up the alley of the rich & powerful personnel of international bureaucracies & media who seek to control the world! Indian doctors too are immediately suspect it seems. But I see it almost every night on the news. In our "Global Village" UNJUSTLY torn apart by the powerful & prestigious! As surely as in the UNTOLD stories I have gained just a feather of insight into! In the meanwhile, you will be entertained by some clever & thoughtful comic naval drama, 50-odd years old, yet ahead of its time by my reckoning! Ships ahoy, me hearties! And may ye have fairweathers on ye adventures though there be no official pirates in this! As the son of a sailor, me hearties, a 9 out of 10, as ye walk the plank according to your interests & convictions.

For sometimes, the sharks on board are worse than those in the water!

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