Ted Hanover: A gentle smile often breeds a kick in the pants.
Jim Hardy: What brings you here on this bright and uninviting day?
Jim Hardy: I don't need a coat, now!
Linda Mason: You better go inside, it's cold and you don't have a coat...
[gently pushes him]
Linda Mason: Go on.
Jim Hardy: [kisses her, moves back] Well I don't need a coat anymore.
Lila Dixon: [about Jim] He gets a look.
Ted Hanover: He always has that look! It doesn't mean anything emotionally. It has something to do with his... liver.
Lila Dixon: [to Ted] I love you... and Jim.
Ted Hanover: Well, I love Jim too... but let's not get too chummy.
Ted Hanover: [reading] Come out and relax on a farm, music, dancing, home cooking. Open holidays only.
Ted Hanover: Open holiday's only? Say, how many of them are there?
Jim Hardy: [excited] About 15. That gives me 350 days to kick around in!
Ted Hanover: [laughing] You would think of that!
Mamie: Is your names Mamie?
Mamie: Get back in the kitchen!
Mamie: Is your names Miss Linda?
[talking about peach preserves]
Ted Hanover: Oh boy, do I go for those! Why they're great on... on...
Ted Hanover: ... or even plain!
Linda Mason: What would you like?
Danny Reed: Orchids, the finest you've got.
Linda Mason: Corsage?
Danny Reed: No, no. A dozen, loose, looking like they don't care!
Ted Hanover: It's going to be easy - like peeling a turtle.
Jim Hardy: For that kinda of money you oughta be able to go by way o' Medicine Hat!
Danny Reed: If I'm not the best manager in the business, I'll eat a garage mechanic's shirt!
Jim Hardy: Well what do you visualize, Ziggy?
Jim Hardy: Right now I've got the ledger in an iron lung.
Danny Reed: How'd he get that far in five minutes?
Ted Hanover: The lady must have been willing.
Danny Reed: The world can't do this to us!
Ted Hanover: I like it here... with you and Linda.
Jim Hardy: And we love having you. When are you leaving?
Danny Reed: François! Have you seen Mr. Hanover?
François: Twice, sir. The first time he came from his dressing room he had a telegram in his hand. He ordered scotch and soda. A bottle of each.
Danny Reed: I know! I know!
François: The second time he came from his dressing room he asked which way is Connecticut.
Danny Reed: Connecticut?
François: Connecticut. He said he had a friend there who knows about women too.
Danny Reed: Why didn't you stop him?
François: How can I stop him sir when I don't know which way is Connecticut!
Jim Hardy: [Handing a cup of coffee to Ted] Here, take a slug out of the mug.
Linda Mason: You sound sweet, but you don't make sense.
Mamie: [about winning Linda back] You could melt her heart right down to butter, if you'd only turn on the heat!
Jim Hardy: [trying to describe Linda] She was sort of a medium built, medium height. With a nice evening gown on with a belt in the back. She's sorta built like the girl I knew from the corner drugstore who used to play pinball. Conshwella Schlepkiss. I remember she was high man three weeks in a row.
Linda Mason: My father was a lot like you, just a man with a family. Never amounted to much, didn't care. But as long as he was alive, we always had plenty to eat and clothes to keep us warm.
Jim Hardy: Were you happy?
Linda Mason: Yes.
Jim Hardy: Then your father was a very successful man.
Dance Extra: What is this the daisy chain?
Ted Hanover: Sorry, we're just looking for the back of a woman we don't know.
Ted Hanover: When a fellow is surprised to hear about his own wedding, brother that's when I go to work with a clear conscience.
Jim Hardy: It's a great act, isn't it?