Leon: I'll picket your whole country! I'll boycott you! No more vodka! No more caviar! No more Tchaikovsky! No more borscht!
Anna: Oh, that Burganoff. You never know if he's on his way to the washroom or the secret police.
Ninotchka: I should hate to see our country endangered by my underwear.
Comissar Razinin: This anonymous report was sent to me. They're dragging the good name of our country through every cafe and nightclub. Here: How can the Bolshevik cause gain respect among the Muslims if your three representatives Bujlianoff, Iranoff and Kopalski get so drunk that they throw a carpet out of their hotel window and complain to the management that it didn't fly?
Ninotchka: I must have a complete report of your negotiations and a detailed expense account.
Buljanoff: No, non, Ninotchka. Don't ask for it. There's an old Turkish proverb that says: If something smells bad, why put your nose in it?
Ninotchka: And there is an old Russian saying: The cat with cream on his whiskers had better find good excuses.
Leon: A radio's a little box that you buy on the installment plan, and before you tune it in, they tell you there's a new model out.
Ninotchka: We don't have men like you in my country.
Leon: Thank you.
Ninotchka: That is why I believe in the future of my country.
Leon: It's midnight. Look at the clock, one hand has met the other hand, they kiss. Isn't that wonderful?
Count Leon D'Algout: Do you like me just a little bit?
Ninotchka: Your general appearance is not distasteful.
Ninotchka: Why should you carry other people's bags?
Porter: Well, that's my business, Madame.
Ninotchka: That's no business. That's social injustice.
Porter: That depends on the tip.
Ninotchka: The last mass trials were a great success. There are going to be fewer but better Russians.
Leon: A Russian! I love Russians! Comrade, I've been fascinated by your five-year plan for the last fifteen years.
Ninotchka: What have you done for mankind?
Leon: Not so much for mankind... for womankind, my record isn't quite so bleak.
Leon: Ninotchka, it's midnight. One half of Paris is making love to the other half.
Ninotchka: Let's form our own party.
Leon: Right. Lovers of the world, unite!
Ninotchka: I'm so happy, I'm so happy! Nobody can be so happy without being punished.
Iranoff: We can say whatever we want. We can shout! We can complain! Look: THE SERVICE IN THIS HOTEL IS TERRIBLE! See? Nobody comes, nobody pays any attention! That's freedom.
Buljanoff: That's bad management.
Ninotchka: Must you flirt?
Count Leon d'Algout: Well, I don't have to, but I find it natural.
Ninotchka: Suppress it.
Ninotchka: When I kissed you, I betrayed a Russian ideal. I should be stood up against the wall.
Leon: Would that make you feel better?
Ninotchka: Much better.
Ninotchka: I have paid the penalty.
Ninotchka: The day will come when you will be free. Go to bed, Little Father, we want to be alone.
Prologue: This picture takes place in Paris in those wonderful days when a siren was a brunette and not an alarm - and if a Frenchman turned out the light it was not on account of an air raid!
Grand Duchess Swana: The morning after always looks grim if you happen to be wearing last night's dress.
[Ninotchka is examining a map of Paris]
Leon: Pardon me, are you an explorer?
Ninotchka: No. I'm looking for the Eiffel Tower.
Leon: Good heavens, is that thing lost again? Oh, are you interested in a view?
Ninotchka: I'm interested in the Eiffel Tower from a technical standpoint.
Leon: Technical? No, no, I'm afraid I couldn't be of much help from that angle. You see, a Parisian only goes to the tower in moments of despair to jump off.
Ninotchka: How long does it take a man to land?
Leon: Now isn't that too bad? The last time I jumped, I forgot to time it.
Leon: What kind of a girl are you, anyway?
Ninotchka: Just what you see. A tiny cog in the great wheel of evolution.
Leon: You're the most adorable cog I've ever seen.
Russian Visa Official: Everything is in order. Enjoy your trip to Russia, Madam.
English Lady Getting Visa: Thank you. Oh, by the way, I've heard so many rumors about laundry conditions in Russia. Is it advisable to take one's own towels?
Russian Visa Official: Certainly not, Madam! That is only Capitalistic propaganda. We change the towel once a week.
Russian Visa Official: To an unseen caller: "Hello! Comrade Kasabian? No, I am sorry. He hasn't been with us for six months. He was called back to Russia and was investigated. You can get further details from his widow."
Ninotchka: [to Leon] I want to tell you something which I thought I would never say, which I thought nobody should ever say because I thought it didn't exist. And Leon, I can't say it.
Ninotchka: As basic material, you may not be bad, but you are the unfortunate product of a doomed culture. I feel very sorry for you.
Pere Mathieu, Cafe Owner: Now, what shall it be?
Ninotchka: Raw beets and carrots.
Pere Mathieu, Cafe Owner: Madame, this is a restaurant, not a meadow.