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Block-Heads (1938) Poster

(1938)

Quotes

Stan: Do you think your wife would mind if I smoked my pipe?

Oliver: Of course not. What's all right with me is okay with her.

Stan: I know, but a lot of dames are particular.

Oliver: Well yes, but... What do you mean calling my wife a dame?

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[repeated line]

Stan: There's going to be a fight.

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Oliver: [running into the apartment from the hallway] It's my wife! You've got to hide!

Mrs. 'Toots' Gilbert: Oh, I can explain.

Oliver: Not in my pajamas you can't explain; you don't *know* my wife!

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Stan: You remember how dumb I used to be?

Oliver: Yeah?

Stan: Well, I'm better now.

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Stan: If you want me to go, I'll stay as long as you like.

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Oliver: But, Dear, I haven't seen Stan in 20 years.

Mrs. Hardy: I couldn't see him in a hundred years.

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Stan: How long did you say it would take us to get up there?

Oliver: Oh, just a jiffy.

Stan: How far is a jiffy?

Oliver: About three shakes of a dead lamb's tail.

Stan: I didn't think it was so far.

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Oliver: [Ollie's house key, attached to his pants, is stuck in the lock, so to free Ollie, he had to remove his pants; Stan easily removes the key from the lock] Why didn't you tell me you had the key out of the lock?

Stan: Well, you didn't ask me.

Oliver: "You didn't ask me".

Stan: Gee, that's pretty underwear.

Oliver: Don't get personal.

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Oliver: Ha ha ha! Come see my grandfather. My grandfather left. He said, "Hello, sugar!"

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James, porter: [Responding after Hardy asks if there's anything in the newspaper] Here's a story about a fella who spent twenty years in the trenches and didn't know the war was over.

Oliver: [laughing] Really?

James, porter: Yeah; here's his picture

[shows Hardy the paper]

Oliver: [Looking at a photo of the grinning soldier] I can't imagine anybody being that dumb.

Oliver: [Realizes the grinning soldier is Stan; does a massive take and grabs the paper back from Morton; looks directly into the camera] Oh, yes I can.

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Stan: No, you see, everybody thought I was dead. Didn't they?

Oliver: Um, hmm.

Lulu: How did you find out you weren't?

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Mr. Gilbert: [Leers at Stan and Ollie] While the Cat's away the Rats will play huh? Listen, I know where we can find a couple of beautiful blondes!

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Oliver: But, Toots, Stan is different.

Mrs. Hardy: I'll say he's different!

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Stan: What's a knick-knack?

Oliver: Oh a knick-knack is a thing that sits on top of a whatnot.

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Mrs. Hardy: [adorably] And make that hour short.

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Mrs. Hardy: [coming back from store] So you were only going to be gone an hour!

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Stan: [to 901 guy] There's going to be a fight.

Stan: [to bypassers] There's going to be a fight.

Stan: [to guy going into apartment] Hey, there's going to be a fight.

Stan: [to desk guy] You better call an ambulance. It's going to be terrible. There's going to be a fight.

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Oliver: Why didn't you tell me you had two legs?

Stan: Well, you didn't ask me... I've always had 'em...

Oliver: [sarcastically] You're better now...

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Mr. Gilbert: I know where there's a whole bunch of blondes!

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Mr. Gilbert: I don't bring 'em back alive; I shoot 'em. I come back alive.

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See also

Trivia | Goofs | Crazy Credits | Alternate Versions | Connections | Soundtracks

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