Fritzi 'Muggins' Kiffmeyer: We women can do things to a man we love that men wouldn't do to a rattlesnake.
Grandpa Clayton: [Rhetorically] How do yuh think I'm gonna run a stallion farm without a stud?
Fritzi 'Muggins' Kiffmeyer: Oh, there he is, the sweetheart!
Duke Bradley: Who, your husband?
Fritzi 'Muggins' Kiffmeyer: No, that colt!
Grandpa Clayton: [to Duke] Say, we got more dead horses on this place than live ones!
Jesse Kiffmeyer: [to Maizie about her use of his cold cream] From now on, Madam, your face is in your own hands!
Maizie: You'll never know what my face looked like before your preparation.
Jesse Kiffmeyer: [Dryly] I can imagine.
Jesse Kiffmeyer: Are you the caretaker here?
Grandpa Clayton: [Taking offense] Caretaker, you infernal jackass! My grandfather built this dump!