- Consul-General: Your highness is a bellboy?
- Sandro: I was a bellboy. That's why I came to see you. I got fired.
- Mr. Spitzer: [On the phone] How's our stock of casaba melons? What? No casaba melons? Well, get some. Wire for some. Have them sent by mail. Air mail. Special delivery.
- Consul-General: Very well, gentlemen. All I ask is, that when his highness arrives, you will try and conduct yourselves with dignity..
- Spellek: Yeaahh.
- Consul-General: ...and decorum.
- Spellek: Ye... .What's that, huh?
- Mr. Squires: Young man, I'll tell you a secret - just among men, okay?
- Sandro: Yeah.
- Mr. Squires: All Women's hats are monstrosities.
- Consul-General: Perhaps your highness would prefer to be the janitor?
- Sandro: Oh, janitor, or general manager, house detective, anything. I don't care.
- Miss Channing: Just one of the teeming millions in the Middle West.
- Lord Clewe: Did you millions, darling?
- Miss Channing: People, Denny - not dollars
- Sandro: Does madam wish to order?
- Mirabel: I'll have fried chicken.
- Sandro: Well, if I may suggest..
- Mirabel: What?
- Sandro: The pigeonette du clos, I assure madam, is superb.
- Mirabel: I'll have the chicken, please.
- Sandro: But, the pigeonette eh...
- Mirabel: Fried chicken!
- Sandro: The pigeonette du clos with a............
- Mirabel: [Slamming her hand on the table] Fried chicken!
- Mirabel: Isn't it wonderful, Mr. Mercer? You don't know what it means. You've never had to wash and wear the same silk stockings every day.
- Mr. Mercer - Banker: I beg your pardon.
- Head Waiter: I'm so sorry this has happened, madam. May I take madam's order now?
- Mirabel: Yes.
- Head Waiter: We can say that the breast of chicken is very delicious, madam.
- Mirabel: [Looking indignant] Certainly not! Pigeonette.
- Mr. Squires: I'll tell you another secret.
- Sandro: Yes, please.
- Mr. Squires: You won't tell anybody?
- Sandro: Oh, no. What is it?
- Mr. Squires: You're fired.
- Italian Restaurant Host: From here, signorina, you can see the street, you can see the restaurant, and you can see each other.
- Sandro: Say, what's the matter? You don't seem very glad to see me.
- Consul-General: But I don't see. Your highness can't possibly be here.
- Sandro: Can't I?
- Consul-General: Your highness mustn't be here. Your highness isn't here.
- Sandro: Well, where am I then?
- Consul-General: Your highness, your highness is on the Colonia, in the middle of the ocean.
- Consul-General: Your highness is a bellboy?
- Sandro: I was a bellboy. That's why I came to see you. I got fired.
- Consul-General: Huh?
- Sandro: Yes, I got fired.
- Consul-General: What? They cannot fire Prince Alesandro d'Alesandria
- Sandro: You've got to call the Walsdorf-Plaza. Ask for Mr. Spitzer, and tell him that if he wants the contracts, it, uh, might be wise to reinstate one of your countrymen - a bellboy, Number 14, huh.
- Mirabel: Do you want me to call the head waiter?
- Sandro: I don't care if you call the police, madam, I am only trying to tell you that you are right and I am wrong. You are the guest and I am the waiter. I forgot myself. I beg you to forgive me. Please, don't you understand? I apologize.
- Head Waiter: [Arriving at her table] What is wrong, madam?
- [to Sandro]
- Head Waiter: What's going on here?
- Sandro: Please go away. Don't disturb us.
- Mirabel: Well, who asked your opinion anyway? Is everyone in this hotel crazy? Get out of here, both of you. Get out! How dare you? What kind of a hotel is this? Go on, get out!
- Mr. Spitzer: Well, I'll fire him again. Instruct the entire staff.
- Bell Captain: Yes, sir.
- Mr. Spitzer: If he ever comes in this hotel again, throw him out.
- Bell Captain: Yes, sir.
- Mr. Spitzer: And if he won't stay out, shoot him.
- Bell Captain: Yes, sir.
- Mr. Spitzer: Even if Washington calls up, he's fired.
- Bell Captain: Yes, sir.
- Mr. Spitzer: I don't care if it means utter war.
- Bell Captain: Yes, sir.
- Mr. Squires: Young man, I'll tell you a secret - just among men, okay?
- Sandro: Yeah.
- Mr. Squires: All Women's hats are monstrosities.
- Sandro: No kid... Oh, that's so true, Mr. Squires.
- Mr. Squires: That's a secret we men must carry to our graves.
- Mirabel: Or maybe you think I like everything about you.
- Sandro: All right, let's start with what you don't like about me.
- Mirabel: Well, your nose is crooked.
- Sandro: My nose is crooked? I never knew that. Well, I can have that fixed. Is that all?
- Mirabel: No, it isn't even half. You're impudent, egotistical, presumptuous, and fresh.
- Sandro: All right, I'll tell you what we'll do. I promise to change everything about myself, if you'll promise to stay exactly as you are.
- Lord Clewe: Why don't you wear the orchids I sent you?
- Miss Channing: Oh, don't pretend. You know very well you forgot them.
- Lord Clewe: Forgot them? Wait a minute...
- Miss Channing: [to Lord Clewe] Well, come on. You can dance and think at the same time - the way you dance.