Wedding Rings (1929) Poster


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a Dike and two bikes.
F Gwynplaine MacIntyre1 October 2005
Warning: Spoilers
I viewed an incomplete print of 'Wedding Rings' that had a British exhibition certificate added to the opening reel. Several reels were missing, and portions of the surviving reels had deteriorated. All in all, I managed to comprehend about only 18 minutes' worth of this movie. However, based on what I saw and heard, this movie has only about 18 minutes' worth of plot, and most of it is dead boring.

Right, here goes. Cornelia and Eve Quinn are sisters, but -- as you might guess from their names -- elder Cornelia is strait-laced and prim, whilst younger Eve is exotic and sultry. (It helps that Eve is played by the very sexy Olive Borden.) We might suppose that Eve has no difficulty acquiring beaux: instead, something slightly more unusual happens. Apparently it's prim Cornelia who has no difficulty acquiring gentlemen admirers: she's had a long series of them, in fact. (The secret of her success is never explained ... or maybe it's in part of the movie that I didn't see.) Her difficulty is in hanging onto those men. For some reason, it amuses Eve to lure away each of Cornelia's boyfriends in turn, only keeping each one until Cornelia has acquired another beau for Eve to steal. Nice pair of sisters, these.

For reasons that are even more incomprehensible -- maybe they were explained in the parts of the movie that I've not seen, though I rather doubt it -- Eve decides to break the pattern by rushing off into an elopement with Cornelia's next beau. This fellow rejoices in the name Lewis Dike ... and Eve takes his name in marriage, so now she's a Dike too. Unfortunately, this Dike (the male one) is played by H.B. Warner, an actor who -- how can I put this tactfully? -- utterly fails to convince me that he has any romantic interest in women. He also quite fails to convince me that any woman would be eager to marry him ... much less the sexy and vivacious Eve, who can clearly do much better. On the other hand, one of Dike's predecessors in this sobfest is played by Hallam Cooley. If H.B. Warner and Hallam Cooley ever got into a machismo contest, Cooley would win ... but by a very narrow margin.

SPOILERS COMING. Oh, I nearly forgot. Eventually Mr Dike grows some bottle and divorces Eve, then returns to Cornelia. So bloody what? This movie is dead boring. Bill Beaudine's usual slipshod direction prevails. Kathlyn Williams is good in a supporting role. (IMDb have got her listed as Kay Williams, but her forename is Kathlyn in the cast list of this U.K. print.) Her performance, and the substantial sex appeal of Olive Borden, are the only assets on offer here. I shan't rate this film, as I viewed an incomplete print.
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