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Kevin Smith Says 'Clerks III' May Be a ... Book?

17 February 2013 10:20 AM, PST

Kevin Smith has kind of been all over the place in recent months when it comes to the highly anticipated "Clerks III." First he was going to do it as a limited run Broadway play. But then he thought, you know what, let's make "Clerks III" my final movie ever!

And now? Well, now Smith has decided he's just going to write "Clerks III" as an book instead. Online. With reader interaction helping shape the story.

Whatever you say, man. Whatever you say.

"I want to do 'Clerks III' as a book first," Smith revealed in an online NewTek interview. "I want to do it in episodic chapters. So that as I release it, people can read the whole thing and see what it would look like."

"I get to go inside the characters' heads, tell Year One origin stories where the first chapter is Dante and Randall meeting in kindergarten, »

- Scott Harris

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'Die Hard' Kills Softly at the Box Office

17 February 2013 9:02 AM, PST

The calendar may have said Valentine's Day, but for movie fans it was "A Good Day to Die Hard," as according to Film.com the latest entry in Bruce Willis' decrepit action franchise eked out a win at the box office this weekend.

Not that it was easy; with an estimated total of $25 million, "A Good Day to Die Hard" barely beat out returning champion "Identity Thief," which racked up $23.4 million. And the latest sappy Nicholas Sparks romance "Safe Haven" also made a good showing, earning $21.4 million for a third place finish.

"Twilight" wannabe "Beautiful Creatures," on the other hand, took a complete header, debuting way down in sixth place with just $7.5 million. For a full look at that film's failure, as well as the rest of the box office top ten, head to Film.com. »

- Scott Harris

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Blasphemy Alert! 'SNL' Unveils Quentin Tarantino's 'Djesus Uncrossed'

17 February 2013 8:33 AM, PST

Hey guys, remember that hilarious batch of fake Quentin Tarantino posters we made up a couple weeks ago, highlighting all the historical revenge fantasies we wish Tarantino would film? Well, it looks like someone at "Saturday Night Live" must have been paying attention, because last night they actually filmed one of our ideas.

But even we couldn't have guessed at how damn funny "Djesus Uncrossed" would be.

Of course, we called our version "Biblical Proportions," but it's basically the same thing: Christoph Waltz plays a resurrected Jesus who sets out on a bloody rampage of revenge, aided by the greatest posse ever assembled.

Check it out, courtesy of NBC.com. And don't worry, "SNL," you're more than welcome to swipe our ideas any time you like. »

- Scott Harris

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Link Riot: What a Pixar 'Star Trek' Would Look Like

16 February 2013 4:00 AM, PST

• Here's what it might look like if Pixar decided to boldly go where no man has gone before. [BuzzFeed]

• The 25 hottest women starring in Young Adult movie franchises. Yes, they're all old enough to be referred to as "hot." [Complex]

• Just launched: Blockbuster Awards Night, an interactive site designed to host, manage and facilitate participation in a fantasy league celebrating the 2013 Academy Awards. Do it! [Blockbuster Awards]

• A selection of Bruce Willis' many exclamations in "A Good Day to Die Hard." John McClane is definitely a Christian. [Vulture]

• Blessed be! Here are 10 memorable (if not always wicked) movie witches. [The Playlist]

• Beware the skies! The 14 scariest things to come from meteor showers. [BuzzFeed]

• Oh, and you can stream "Armageddon" in its entirety right here, if you want. You don't want to miss a thing, after all! [Death and Taxes]

• The Top 10 facts you need to know about former Bond girl and "To the Wonder" beauty Olga Kurylenko. [Heavy]

• Here's how to »

- NextMovie Staff

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'Silver Linings' Reunion! Jennifer Lawrence Joins 'American Bulls**t'

15 February 2013 4:13 PM, PST

Why break up a winning team, after all?

Jennifer Lawrence is sticking with the director and co-star who helped guide her to what will probably be an Oscar win later this month as she signs on to join the cast of what used to be called "American Bullsh**," according to Deadline.

The film reunites Lawrence with her "Silver Linings Playbook" director, David O. Rusell, and co-star, Bradley Cooper. It's actually an even more extensive reunion for the director, as the cast also includes Christian Bale and Amy Adams, who starred in Russell's "The Fighter."

The project chronicles the initiation and implementation of Abscam, a 1970s FBI sting operation that took down a bunch of U.S. congressmen. Katniss Everdeen will be married to Bruce Wayne in the movie, as Lawrence is set to play Bale's wife. The cast also includes Jeremy Renner (Hawkeye!) and Louis C.K. (Louie!).

The film also »

- Bryan Enk

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Questions and Answers With Creed Bratton

15 February 2013 3:06 PM, PST

You probably best know Creed Bratton as, well, Creed Bratton. The 70-year-old — who played guitar in The Grass Roots — has made an acting career for himself by playing a character bearing his same name on NBC's "The Office" since 2005. Now that the show is in its final season, Bratton is stepping out in more film roles, one of them as Sen. Charles Sumner in "Saving Lincoln." Out in limited release today, the film chronicles the friendship between President Abraham Lincoln (yes, another Lincoln-centric movie) and his faithful bodyguard, Ward Hill Lamon, in the contentious time of abolition.

NextMovie caught up with Bratton ahead of the film's release and talked about Lincoln cage matches, the bow of "The Office," and how he feels about karaoke. (Hint: Not positively!)

Congratulations on the movie. Have you seen a final cut yet?

I haven't seen it yet, I'm waiting for the premiere. He sent me a copy, »

- Kase Wickman

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Harrison Ford Is Back As Han Solo!!! (... or Is He?)

15 February 2013 1:28 PM, PST

Shenangians Alert!

According to a new report from Latino Review, Harrison Ford has signed on to reprise his role as Han Solo in the upcoming Disney blockbuster "Star Wars: Episode VII," an occurrence that once seemed about as likely as Yoda giving birth to a bantha.

But is it true?

Here's what we know for sure: "Star Wars: Episode VII" director J.J. Abrams is a huge fan of "Star Wars" and there's no doubt that Han Solo is the most popular character from the original trilogy. And since the execs at Disney have mentioend before that they may be open to bringing back the original cast, chances are pretty good that Abrams would wlecome Ford with open arms.

On the other hand, this is exactly the kind of thing that Ford is notoriously uninterested in. In fact, he didn't really like the character of Han Solo that much to begin with, »

- Scott Harris

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Christopher 'Ronnie' Walken Was a High School Hottie (Here's Proof)

15 February 2013 1:17 PM, PST

Reddit user summitrock has some interesting news to share: His mother went to school with Christopher Walken, and she has the yearbook photo to prove it!

Listed as "Ronnie Walken," the future movie star and equally hilarious and horrifying scene-stealer looks super-cool with a clean-cut blond (!) hairstyle. Not only that, but the dude's senior quote comes from William Shakespeare himself, proving that the guy was always a class act, years before playing "The Continental" on "SNL".

His blurb lists Walken as a "tall, blue-eyed cavalier" and "watchful dreamer" who will "speak up quite suddenly...and then lapse back into silence." Yup, sounds like our guy. "Ronnie," as it reads, was eagerly pursuing a career in theater, so suffice it to say, becoming a highly-regarded movie star was probably not such a bad back-up plan, after all. »

- Eliot Glazer

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Questions and Answers With Craig Robinson

15 February 2013 1:00 PM, PST

If you saw Craig Robinson on the street, you would probably call him Darryl. That's okay with him — people do it almost every day. After all, he's been playing the sarcastic warehouse worker-turned-manager by that name on "The Office" since 2005. Soon, though, Dunder Mifflin will close its doors for good and Robinson will be Darryl no more. Not that he was in the first place: Robinson has had memorable parts in "Knocked Up," "Hot Tub Time Machine," "Pineapple Express" and others. This week, he's back on the big screen with "Escape From Planet Earth." Or at least, his voice is. In the animated feature, Robinson voices Doc, a Furby-like alien talk radio host who has been taken hostage by scheming humans and forced to implement alien technology on Earth. Twitter? Yeah, that's all Doc.

NextMovie sat down with Robinson in New York ahead of the film's release to talk about aliens, »

- Kase Wickman

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'Star Wars' Meets 'Rudy' in This Hilarious 'Yody' Mash-Up

15 February 2013 11:34 AM, PST

Ever since Disney acquired Lucasfilm, the world has been waiting to see what that might look like. Luckily, the team at "Conan" is more than ready to serve up a hot, piping mashup parody that certainly answers the question by marrying aliens and football.

"Yody" raises the question: What would it look like if Yoda's dream was to play football at Notre Dame? Just like Sean Astin's impossible dream in "Rudy," it certainly wouldn't be easy, considering the guy clocks in at "two feet tall, five pounds heavy, and nine hundred years old." But, hey, Disney movies never leave a dream unfulfilled, which is why seeing Yoda as Rudy is time well spent, even if it may never actually come true.

But if you're reading this, Disney execs, we'd very much like to see that come true (hint, hint). »

- Eliot Glazer

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John McClane Near-Deaths in the 'Die Hard' Movies: A Complete History

15 February 2013 11:30 AM, PST

At one point in "Groundhog Day," Phil Connors (Bill Murray) claims to his co-worker Rita (Andie MacDowell) that he is a god. (Not the god, he doesn't think.) To prove it, he recalls that he's been "stabbed, shot, frozen, poisoned, hung, electrocuted, and burned."

John McClane laughs at you, Phil Connors. John McClane is the god.

Over the course of the first four films in the "Die Hard" franchise, John McClane (Bruce Willis) almost died 68 total times. And we're not talking "almost died" in normal terms, like "someone is pointing a gun at me" almost died, we're talking "He just got chucked off of that moving 747 - how is he still alive?" almost died. John McClane can not be killed.

A comprehensive breakdown, by film, and method:

"Die Hard" (1988)

By Gunfire: 8 times (:43 minute mark, :45, :50, 1:32, 1:34, 1:48, 1:51, 1:57)


Each time, the weapon used was an automatic machine gun. »

- Nick Blake

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What If 'Jaws: The Revenge' Was Actually Good?

15 February 2013 11:18 AM, PST

It's pretty common knowledge to movie buffs (or human beings with eyes) that "Jaws: The Revenge" is the literal equivalent of shark-jumping. Calling it a "flop" would be putting it lightly, considering the no good, very bad caper earned a 0% approval rating on Rotten Tomatoes, and is widely considered one of the worst movies ever made. Even Michael Caine couldn't save the damn thing, and that guy is good.

But the editor of Dinosaur Boner (hello, and welcome to the internet) decided it was high time to give the movie the old recut trailer treatment, writing, "I tried to cut it as if it was a critically acclaimed indie film, instead of giant heap of trash. But to be fair, I've probably seen 'Jaws: The Revenge' over 10 times because it's one of my biggest guilty pleasure films."

So there you have it: a good enough reason as any »

- Eliot Glazer

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Pucker Up for Cinema's Creepiest Kisses

15 February 2013 9:28 AM, PST

It's the morning after Valentine's Day, love is in the air, and… bees are in your mouth? Akk!

Tony Todd's "Candyman" is just one of several ghouls delivering "Cinema's Most Disturbing Smooches," courtesy of editor Oliver Noble and those inebriated reprobates at FilmDrunk.

This holiday-appropriate mashup features more cringe-inducing PDAs than a Roman vomitorium, whether it's some human-on-mallard action from "Howard The Duck," Christopher Walken's headless horseman taking a bite out of crime in "Sleepy Hollow," or Chuck Heston saying no to gun control and self control as he plants a hot one on a "Planet of the Apes" resident.

The final clip is a tip-o'-the-hat to one of science fiction's most famously incestuous magic moments, so sit back, give yourself a little spray of Banaca, and enjoy these seriously lousy liplocks. »

- Max Evry

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This 'Back to the Future' Hoverboard eBay Listing Is Totally Shredding!

15 February 2013 8:46 AM, PST

Every time we watch the "Back to the Future" trilogy, we have just one reaction: When are we going to be able to buy those cool hover skateboards? You know what we mean: In "Back to the Future Part II," Marty and the gang travel to the year 2015 and all the kids are floating around on hoverboards, totally shredding. And yet, here we are, just two years away, and there's still no sign of hoverboards anywhere.

Until today, that is, because thanks to the magic of eBay, you can buy your very own official "Back to the Future" hoveboard right now.

Of course, there are a couple of caveats. First of all, the hoverboard in question does not, technically speaking, actually hover. That's because it's actually an authentic prop made for use in the film not by Michael J. Fox's Marty McFly, but rather by Griff Tannen, son of »

- Scott Harris

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Mad Max's Weekend Movie Guide: 'Die Hard' & More

15 February 2013 7:00 AM, PST

"People in the United Kingdom and outside the United States share my bemusement with the United States that America doesn't share with itself." – Bill Hicks

Greetings from the apocalypse, and welcome to an extra-long, extra-fun Presidents Day weekend that does not involve Bill Clinton. (Actually, it does, but I can't resist a good penis joke.) Enjoy the festivities, and if George W. Bush asks why he didn't get an invite to the BBQ just tell him it must have gotten lost in the mail. If he still won't shut up about it just tell him to go paint another picture of his bathroom.

Friday, February 15

O John McClane, where art thou? Having watched all four prior flicks in the "Die Hard" canon this week, I am saddened to hear that this might be a bad weekend for "A Good Day to Die Hard." The Rotten Tomatoes scoreboard has this puppy »

- Max Evry

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Link Riot: Fun With the 'Die Hard' Title Generator

15 February 2013 4:00 AM, PST

• "Funny or Die Hard." "Die Hard Rock Cafe." Playing with the "Die Hard" sequel title generator is more fun than watching "A Good Day to Die Hard." [Vulture]

• Speaking of "Die Hard," here are all the times John McClane should've actually, you know, died. [The Playlist]

• 49 — yes, 49 — reasons why "The Notebook" is the worst movie ever made. Even with Ryan Gosling in it. [BuzzFeed]

• The Songs of Seth MacFarlane: Relive the Oscar host's most memorable musical moments. [Moviefone]

• Who cares if it ain't Valentine's Day any more? Swoon over the Best Movie Kisses of all time. [BuzzSugar]

• The most painfully awkward movie sex scenes of all time. And that's saying something. [ScreenCrush]

• The 20 worst Hollywood remakes of the century ... and we're only 13 years in. [Death and Taxes]

• Handicapping the Oscars: Which short films will take home the gold? [Film.com]

• The 10 most dysfunctional couples in movie history. Yeah, Cob and Mal in "Inception" are all sorts of messed up. [The Week]

• Summer's officially just around the corner! »

- NextMovie Staff

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Chris Hemsworth and Michael Mann Will Cyber-Thrill You

14 February 2013 4:46 PM, PST

Director Michael Mann is known his love of extreme (and we do mean extreme) close-ups. And now he's found the perfect subject for those visual indulgences.

The "Public Enemies" director has decided that it's finally time to make another movie, and while it doesn't have a title yet, it does have an A-list leading man: the God of Thunder himself, Chris Hemsworth, according to Heat Vision.

The untitled yet mighty Mann/Hemsworth team-up is described as a thriller that revolves around cyber-terrorism, though other details are being kept under wraps, including anything on Hemsworth's role (though we assume that he'll be playing a guy who battles those responsible for the cyber-terrorism). Mann co-wrote the script with Morgan Davis Foehl.

Mann hasn't directed a feature film since 2009's "Public Enemies," and he's notorious for developing projects and then abandoning them when studio funding doesn't come through or he just loses interest. »

- Bryan Enk

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Stalking or Romance? Your Favorite Rom-Coms Re-examined

14 February 2013 4:27 PM, PST

It's Valentine's Day and love is in the air. Don't deny it; you feel it too. All of this frilly lovey-doveyness just makes you want to grab a box of chocolates and a glass of wine and hang out with a good rom-com DVD (you didn't think we were going to say a person, did you?). The mythical pull of the rom-com is amazing, enthralling. They always solve their problems and end up happy in the end!

But wait. Take a closer look at the plot the next time you're watching your beloved chick flick — there are usually at least nine "endearing misunderstandings" and "charming half-truths" involved in a typical boy-meets-girl-eventually-they-make-out movie.  Schemes! Plots! But it always turns out ok!

Would that happen in real life?

Here at NextMovie, we walk the streets with a can of Mace in one hand and sharpened nails on the other (and type one-handed »

- Kase Wickman

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Supercut: Will Ferrell Bags All the Hot Chicks

14 February 2013 1:45 PM, PST

They say nice guys finish last, but what about the funny ones? Comedy superstar Will Ferrell proves that laughs will get you everywhere in this supercut that details all the times Ferrell got to lock lips with pretty ladies. And there are a lot of them: Zooey Deschanel, Jenna Fischer, Christina Applegate, and the list goes on...

Okay, sure, so there's a dog, too. And, okay, an old woman. And, fine, there's a basketball, too, but that doesn't erase the fact that the dude planted his lips of Genesis Rodriguez. And, yes, the list also includes an epic makeout with Sacha Baron Cohen, but, really, isn't one Borat worth five Leslie Bibbs? That's how that math works, right?

Conclusion? Keep the jokes coming, fellas. It could do a body good. »

- Eliot Glazer

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Awesome 'Spider-Man' Kiss Prank is Awesome

14 February 2013 1:05 PM, PST

Just in time for Valentine's Day, tribute is finally paid to one of the most romantic kisses in the history of cinema: Kristen Dunst and Tobey Maguire's upside-down, rain-soaked liplock in 2002's "Spider-Man."

The ladies love that stuff, which might sound like the kind of thing you'd hear out of the mouths of some dumb frat brothers, but pranksters Stuart Edgington and Nick Garrett put the theory to the test at Utah State University. Suddenly, life imitated art, when Spidey showed up to send some spidey senses down the spines of campus girls ready to give that iconic kiss an Irl test run.

So...would you let yourself get caught in Spidey's web embrace? »

- Eliot Glazer

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