7 March 2012 11:00 AM, PST | NextMovie | See recent NextMovie news »

It took a full century since Edgar Rice Burroughs created the character in 1912, but "John Carter" is finally slicing, dicing and leaping his way through Martian bad guys to a theater near you via the magic (and deep pockets) of Walt Disney Pictures.

But wait, what's that you say? "John Carter isn't a soldier transported to Mars, he's an emergency room doctor in Chicago!" Them's fightin' words.

To clear up confusion and dishonor, we're pitting Taylor Kitsch's John Carter against Noah Wyle's John Carter from the long-running NBC show "ER." These two had better draw their swords/scalpels and get ready for one serious showdown.

Occupation

Dr. John Truman Carter III: Emergency medicine physician, philanthropist

John Carter of Mars: Confederate Civil War captain, treasure hunter

Advantage: Doctor. Even though the Virginian wins points for general badassery, he mos def picked the wrong side to fight in during the Civil War, »

- Max Evry

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