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xXx: Return Of Xander Cage Review

19 January 2017 2:32 PM, PST | We Got This Covered | See recent We Got This Covered news »

Watching xXx: Return Of Xander Cage mimics the effect of mainlining a Red Bull/Jolt Cola concoction while you skydive off the Empire State Building with only a handkerchief for a parachute. It’s like Shaun White and Travis Pastrana had conjoining daredevil wet dreams that formed some Exxxtreme tsunami of fantastical X-Games stuntmanship. I imagine someone asking “what about a story?” only to have Vin Diesel grab them by the lapel, hoist them up and say, “how about I skateboard, travel and bed sexy ladies for the first twenty minutes, There’S Your Story!” – they complied, of course. That’s the opening to Xander Cage’s adrenaline-packed franchise return, and radness only increases from there broskis and braskis!

Agent Xander Cage’s return is a somber one, since it begins with the death of Augustus Gibbons (Samuel L. Jackson). Government suit Jane Marke (Toni Collette) calls Xander out of retirement to avenge Gibbons’ death, »

- Matt Donato

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1 item from 2017

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