3 items from 2016
A Swarovski-crystal-encrusted rocking horse and luxury doll’s house complete with miniature posh family are probably not what your children need
I thought my boys were going to do all right for presents this Christmas. Not from me, obviously, but from their mum, and their grandparents. Older one is getting a bike (it’s Ok, he won’t see, he’s not a Guardian reader). We’ve decided that one day he’s going to win the Tour de France, though at the moment it looks as if he’s going to need a lot of very good drugs. The younger one is getting an electronic keyboard; he’s going to be a very successful popstar. Plus, there are a couple of small things – toy bus, whoopie cushion, etc. Less than the national average, which, says the programme, is £500 per child, the second highest in the world. But not too bad, »
- Sam Wollaston
You know that subtle annoyance you feel as you’re watching football on the TV? That niggling irritation you feel as you listen to football conversations in the pub? That impulse you can’t seem to control that makes you detox from football every fifth year of your life? Have no fear, for many of us share the same symptoms; we are all suffering from Football Cliche Aversion.
While your extreme responses are a good thing – this is just your immune system trying to protect you – you’re at greater risk of developing Cliche Syndrome yourself if you spend a lot of time digesting the views of football pundits and former players turned television personalities. The syndrome creeps up slowly: first you start quoting John Motson, then you’re laughing at Lineker’s jokes. Before you know it you’re fully parroting Alan Shearer with a bit of Lawro thrown in for poetic advantage, »
- Jarleth Coelan
David Tyrrell/Empics Sport
Steve McClaren’s men might be a million miles away from earning ‘The Entertainers’ tag awarded to Kevin Keegan’s class of ’96, but there are a few rare gems in the current squad that wouldn’t look out of place in the grandad-collared wearing clan.
Not exactly known for his tactical prowess, King Kev was the master of getting the best out of his players without, well, doing too much. Certain fans will argue this is the polar opposite of Steve McClaren, who has a wealth of underachievers in his ranks.
With little in common, other than being part of the former England managers club, it’s clear that McClaren would love to have a few of the old guard at his disposal – Les Ferdinand, Philippe Albert and later Alan Shearer to name a few.
But who exactly would make the transition the other way? Who »
- Jamie Roberts
3 items from 2016
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