Best kills
Some kills are better than others.
Might be some spoilers, so duh, stay out of Riverdale.
Might be some spoilers, so duh, stay out of Riverdale.
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- DirectorManny CotoStarsLarry DrakeHolly Marie CombsCliff De YoungA madman who believes he's a doctor comes to the town where his crazy father was killed, and soon begins murdering people and becoming infatuated with a teenage girl who has a heart condition.School slut Corinne runs into a wall in the hall of mirrors and gets a nosebleed. Dr Giggles, who is actually not a doctor, prescribes a simple fix: a bandaid. Specifically a giant novelty bandaid that pins her to the wall and obstructs the mouth and nose, suffocating her to death.
Runner up: strangulation by sphygmomanometer. - DirectorJoe DanteStarsZach GalliganPhoebe CatesHoyt AxtonA young man inadvertently breaks three important rules concerning his new pet and unleashes a horde of malevolently mischievous monsters on a small town.Mrs Deegle is like the only person who dies in this movie, but oh, what a death.
- DirectorDavid CronenbergStarsJennifer O'NeillStephen LackPatrick McGoohanA scientist trains a man with an advanced telepathic ability called "scanning" to stop a dangerous Scanner with extraordinary psychic powers from waging war against non scanners.Still the gold standard of exploding heads.
- DirectorLarry CohenStarsFred WilliamsonJulius HarrisGloria HendryA gangster in Harlem must rescue his ex-wife, who has been kidnapped by the Mafia.There’s gonna be some overlap between this list and the best scene in a bad movie list. Ok, maybe a lot of overlap. Which brings us to the divine spectacle of Fred “The Hammer” Williamson impaling a gangland rival with a beach umbrella.
- DirectorVincenzo NataliStarsNicole de BoerMaurice Dean WintDavid HewlettA group of strangers awaken to find themselves placed in a giant cube. Each one of them is gifted with a special skill and they must work together to escape an endless maze of deadly traps.The opening. Pun intended, but perhaps not achieved.
- DirectorS. Craig ZahlerStarsKurt RussellPatrick WilsonMatthew FoxIn the dying days of the old west, an elderly sheriff and his posse set out to rescue their town's doctor from cannibalistic cave dwellers.Talk about a pain in the butt.
- DirectorChuck RussellStarsShawnee SmithKevin DillonDonovan Leitch Jr.A deadly entity from space crash-lands near a small town and begins consuming everyone in its path. Panic ensues as shady government scientists try to contain the horrific creature.Take your pick from the smorgasbord of slimy deaths on display here. The sewer kid’s a good one, the phone booth’s a twofer, but if we’re being honest, and hey, that’s an admirable policy, the skeevy lovers’ lane hookup between the supporting jock and a passed out Erika Eleniak is the creme de la creme. Only thing that can match that is the gory fate of the diner worker who gets yanked down the drain by the blob when it clogs the kitchen sink and he attempts to dislodge it with a plunger. Bad move, dude.
- DirectorJason EisenerStarsRutger HauerPasha EbrahimiRobb WellsA homeless vigilante blows away crooked cops, pedophile Santas, and other scumbags with his trusty pump-action shotgun.A whole damn busload of kids gets incinerated by a flamethrower wielding goon to the strains of “Disco Inferno”. Burn baby burn.
- DirectorBruce PittmanStarsLisa SchrageMichael IronsideWendy LyonThirty years after her accidental death at her 1957 senior prom, the tortured spirit of prom queen Mary Lou Maloney returns to seek revenge.Locker room.
- DirectorStuart GordonStarsJeffrey CombsBruce AbbottBarbara CramptonAfter an odd new medical student arrives on campus, a dedicated local and his girlfriend become involved in bizarre experiments centering around the re-animation of dead tissue.Dr Hill dies three excellent deaths: being beheaded by a shovel wielded by a vengeful student is a nasty way to go, but that ain’t the last of him.
- DirectorJ. Michael MuroStarsMike LackeyBill ChepilVic NotoA liquor store owner sells alcoholic beverages to homeless people, unaware of what the bottles actually contain: toxic brew.Ok, here you can’t pick just one. It’s all gravy.
- DirectorGeorge A. RomeroStarsLori CardilleTerry AlexanderJoseph PilatoAs the world is overrun by zombies, a group of scientists and military personnel sheltering in an underground bunker in Florida must decide on how they should deal with the undead horde.Captain Rhodes
- DirectorSonny LagunaTommy WiklundStarsThomas LennonJenny PellicerNelson FranklinAll hell breaks loose when a strange force animates the puppets up for auction at a convention, setting them on a bloody killing spree that's motivated by an evil as old as time.Beheaded by helicopter robot. Not even the nastiest death in the picture, but definitely the funniest.
- DirectorHark TsuiStarsJean-Claude Van DammeDennis RodmanMickey RourkeAn international spy teams up with an arms dealer to escape from a penal colony and rescue his family from a terrorist.Mickey Rourke, by tiger and land mine
- DirectorMichael DoughertyStarsAdam ScottToni ColletteDavid KoechnerA boy who has a bad Christmas accidentally summons a festive demon to his family home.Swallowed whole by carnivorous Jack-in-the-box
- DirectorStephen KingStarsEmilio EstevezPat HingleLaura HarringtonA group of people try to survive when machines start to come alive and become homicidal.Steamroller
- DirectorChris ThomsonStarsTimothy BusfieldBrenda BakkeAidan DevineAliens arrive, parking in a geostationary orbit over Nevada. Using powers unknown to us, they declare war, and use unmanned trucks as weapons.Tonka truck
- DirectorJames GunnStarsNathan FillionElizabeth BanksMichael RookerA small town is taken over by an alien plague, turning residents into zombies and all forms of mutant monsters.Brenda in the barn
- DirectorPeter JacksonStarsTimothy BalmeDiana PeñalverElizabeth MoodyA young man's mother is bitten by a Sumatran rat-monkey. She gets sick and dies, at which time she comes back to life, killing and eating dogs, nurses, friends, and neighbors.Hard to pick just one. The lawnmower? The poor soul whose head gets impaled with a lightbulb? The lady whose head gets torn in half by the zombie baby? It’s another movie with more than its share.
- DirectorFrank HenenlotterStarsRick HearstGordon MacDonaldJennifer LowryOne morning, a young man wakes to find that a small, disgusting creature has attached itself to the base of his brain stem. The creature gives him a euphoric state of happiness but demands human victims in return.The blowjob
- DirectorRichard DonnerStarsGregory PeckLee RemickHarvey StephensMysterious deaths surround an American ambassador. Could the child that he is raising actually be the Antichrist? The Devil's own son?David Warner loses his head
- DirectorDon CoscarelliStarsJames Le GrosReggie BannisterAngus ScrimmMike, now released from a psychiatric hospital, meets with Reggie, and discover his dreams (the events of the original film) are real, and they both journey to find and stop the evil Tall Man from his grim work.The Tall Man gets embalmed alive. Lots of gory, gooey deaths in this series, for sure. The first Phantasm has a great death when a creep at the funeral home takes a ball to the face, but part II ups the ante in a big way: you got a group of zombie dwarves blown away with the ol’ quadruple-barrel shotgun, a chainsaw duel, and more. Part III is no slouch either: there you got a band of thieves murdered “Home Alone” style by a mischievous imp defending his home, you get one of the Tall Man’s death spheres smash a giant hole through a zombie lady’s head, you’ve got… more good stuff, I’m sure.
- DirectorZack SnyderStarsDave BautistaElla PurnellAna de la RegueraFollowing a zombie outbreak in Las Vegas, a group of mercenaries take the ultimate gamble, venturing into the quarantine zone to pull off the greatest heist ever attempted.A zombie gets machine-gunned to a pulp in the opening credits. Later, a booby trap outside the safe smashes another zombie to pulp. Pretty lousy movie, with effects that are mostly not on this level.
- DirectorJames GunnStarsMargot RobbieIdris ElbaJohn CenaSupervillains Harley Quinn, Bloodsport, Peacemaker, and a collection of nutty cons at Belle Reve prison join the super-secret, super-shady Task Force X as they are dropped off at the remote, enemy-infused island of Corto Maltese.Another movie where we can’t pick just one. Let’s break it down. For the A team, it’s Weasel, airdropped from a helicopter off the coast of Corto Maltese for an amphibious landing; too bad nobody bothered to find out if he could swim.
From B team, it’s, well, the only member of B-team who actually dies.
For non-Squaddies, and this is visually the best death here, there’s the soldier who King Shark rips in half in the middle of a rainstorm. Practical effects, using a dummy. The Shark, of course, is CGI. Beautiful. But I have to give some props for the rescue of Colonel Flag, which ends with a terrific gag.
Pour one out for Milton here, too, remarkable chiefly because it goes tragically unnoticed. Poor Milton. - DirectorJames IsaacStarsKane HodderLexa DoigJeff GeddisJason Voorhees is cryogenically frozen at the beginning of the 21st century, and is discovered in the 25th century and taken to space. He gets thawed, and begins stalking and killing the crew of the spaceship that's transporting him.Not crazy about this franchise, but the kill that sticks with me is the scientist getting her head dunked in liquid nitrogen.
- DirectorDavid YaroveskyStarsElizabeth BanksDavid DenmanJackson A. DunnWhat if a child from another world crash-landed on Earth, but instead of becoming a hero to mankind, he proved to be something far more sinister?Badger gets into a bad car accident. And when you think it’s over… it’s not. He’s still alive. A “jaw-dropping” scene, some say
- DirectorPaul W.S. AndersonStarsJason StathamJoan AllenTyrese GibsonEx-con Jensen Ames is forced by the warden of a notorious prison to compete in our post-industrial world's most popular sport: a car race in which inmates must brutalize and kill one another on the road to victory.14K and his navigator getting wiped out by the big rig, which bores through the passenger door with a hubcap-mounted death drill then blows them away with a cannon.
- DirectorJohn FrankenheimerStarsTalia ShireRobert FoxworthArmand AssanteA government health inspector is dispatched to assess the damage a logging company is causing to a patch of forest claimed by Native Americans, and comes face to face with true terror wreaking havoc in the woods.The kid in the sleeping bag frantically hopping away from the bear, alas, was just not hopping fast enough. With one swipe Katahdin smacks his ass into a tree and stuffing flies everywhere. Tres magnifique.
- DirectorTommy Lee WallaceStarsTom AtkinsStacey NelkinDan O'HerlihyKids all over America want Silver Shamrock masks for Halloween. Doctor Daniel Challis seeks to uncover a plot by Silver Shamrock owner Conal Cochran.Silver shamrock!
- DirectorWes CravenStarsHeather LangenkampJohnny DeppRobert EnglundTeenager Nancy Thompson must uncover the dark truth concealed by her parents after she and her friends become targets of the spirit of a serial killer with a bladed glove in their dreams, in which if they die, it kills them in real life.Johnny Depp gets pulled into a hole in his mattress and a fountain of gore erupts. Part one has the best kills by far. From what I’ve seen. Otherworldly and strange. The kills in the sequels are often just silly.
- DirectorChuck RussellStarsHeather LangenkampRobert EnglundCraig WassonA psychiatrist familiar with knife-wielding dream demon Freddy Krueger helps teens at a mental hospital battle the killer who is invading their dreams.Poor girl just wanted to be on television.
- DirectorWes CravenStarsMatthew LabyorteauxKristy SwansonMichael SharrettAfter his friend is killed by her abusive father, the new kid in town attempts to save her by implanting a robotic microchip into her brain.Basketball to the head
- DirectorJamie BlanksStarsDenise RichardsDavid BoreanazMarley SheltonFive women are stalked by an unknown assailant while preparing for Valentine's Day.Victim number 2 gets a couple of Cupid’s arrows straight in the gut. She goes reeling out of a crummy video art exhibit and over the rail of the stairwell, falling several stories into an open dumpster. Not the goriest death in the movie by a mile, but the film’s palpable contempt for this character makes her death nasty and bracing in a way that the film never tops.
- DirectorDon CoscarelliStarsReggie BannisterA. Michael BaldwinBill ThornburyMike and Reggie continue to hunt the mysterious Tall Man, discovering along the way that the invasion has already begun.Love that kid murdering the burglars Home Alone style, but the second time is the charm for one of the robbers, when one of the flying spheres goes through her head like Swiss cheese
- DirectorMark L. LesterStarsDrew BarrymoreDavid KeithFreddie JonesA couple who participated in a potent medical experiment gain telepathic ability and then have a child who is pyrokinetic.Charlie is shooting fireballs at everyone during the climax, and Dr Pynchot, the last of the major villains in need of comeuppance, hops on a little go kart to make his getaway. Dude could probably have gotten away faster on foot, and so he gets blowed up real good. Not really an especially inventive or visually spectacular death, it’s really just the unnecessary go kart that makes it so satisfying. Sorry Doc, maybe you should have minored in kinesthesiology.
- DirectorJames Bond IIIStarsJames Bond IIIKadeem HardisonBill NunnAn evil succubus is preying on libidinous black men in New York City, and all that stands in her way is a minister-in-training, an aspiring actor, and a cop who specializes in cases involving the supernatural.It’s a little bit Freddy Krueger and a good bit more Videodrome. One of our hapless heroes gets eaten by the tv, which then spits out a mess of bloody guts.
- DirectorMario BavaStarsBarbara SteeleJohn RichardsonAndrea ChecchiA vengeful witch and her fiendish servant return from the grave and begin a bloody campaign to possess the body of the witch's beautiful look-alike descendant.Take one Devil mask with spikes on the inner surface and place it over the accused witch’s face. Then simply whack that sucker with a big wooden mallet, and voila! A kill for the history books.
- CreatorLee Sung JinStarsSteven YeunAli WongJoseph LeeTwo people let a road rage incident burrow into their minds and slowly consume their every thought and action.A safe room’s automated door turns out to leave something to be desired in terms of safety. Gruesome but not explicit, unless you count the foley effects. And you should.
- DirectorSean S. CunninghamStarsBetsy PalmerAdrienne KingJeannine TaylorA group of teenage camp counselors attempt to re-open an abandoned summer camp with a tragic past, but they are stalked by a mysterious, relentless killer.Kevin Bacon getting impaled from beneath, a kill the series repeated time and again. Girl in the hammock in part 3. The girl in the raft in The Final Chapter. The girl in the bunkbed in A New Beginning. Lots of variations on that too. Demon in part V, speared with a pole while on the john, for instance. Kinda the same deal.
- DirectorSteve MinerStarsBetsy PalmerAmy SteelJohn FureyFive years after the events of the first film, a summer camp next to the infamous Camp Crystal Lake is preparing to open, but the legend of Jason is weighing heavy on the proceedings.My man in the wheelchair, gets a machete to the face and goes tottering down a steep staircase. I dunno, despite Savini turning this one down (he thought having Jason return from the dead was dumb) it’s got good kills. Sandra and her beau getting speared… Well, I’m actually blanking on others. The dude in the snare.
- DirectorSteve MinerStarsDana KimmellTracie SavageRichard BrookerJason Voorhees stalks a group of friends who have just arrived to spend the weekend at a cabin near Crystal Lake.Mama told Vera not to come, and mama was right. After acquiring Shelly’s hockey mask and spear gun, Voorhees walks up and spears her through the eye with it in a fantastic 3D shot. Some may prefer the eye popping from its socket, but I won’t abide that fake looking plastic head on this list. Ok, honorable mention for that one.
Honorable mention also to the dude doing the handstand. - DirectorJoseph ZitoStarsErich AndersonJudie AronsonPeter BartonAfter being announced dead and taken to a morgue, Jason Voorhees spontaneously revives, escapes from the hospital, and stalks a group of friends renting a house in the countryside near Crystal Lake.Tom Savini’s return to the franchise, reteaming with Joesph Zito, who he worked for on The Prowler. There is a corresponding uptick in gore quality. Lots of candidates. The shower head smooshing. Crispin Glover finding his missing corkscrew. But ultimately we’ve got to give it to Jason, who get his machete stuck in his noggin and falls facedown against the blade.
- DirectorDanny SteinmannStarsMelanie KinnamanJohn ShepherdAnthony BarrileStill haunted by his past, Tommy Jarvis, who, as a child, killed Jason Voorhees, is sent to a secluded halfway house in the countryside, where the killing of a young man triggers a brutal series of murders in the area.With Jason Voorhees well and truly dead, who could be doing all this killing in Final Chapter survivor Tommy Jarvis’ wake? Gee. Well, we don’t see the killer or as much of the kills this time around, but the guy getting his head crushed by a tight leather strap is gonna take the top spot.
Honorable mention to the dumb hillbilly on the bike. I think that’s a situation where we are mostly just glad to see him go, though. - DirectorTom McLoughlinStarsThom MathewsJennifer CookeDavid KagenTommy Jarvis exhumes Jason Voorhees to cremate his corpse, but inadvertently brings him back to life instead. The newly revived killer seeks revenge, and Tommy may be the only one who can stop him.Camp counselor Cort is knocking boots with a young lady in her stepdad’s Winnebago. When spooky things start happening they hightail it out of there… only Jason has snuck inside and hidden himself in the lavatory. He nabs Cort’s date and bashes her head into the wall so hard an imprint of her face forms on the other side.
- DirectorRenny HarlinStarsSylvester StalloneJohn LithgowMichael RookerA botched mid-air heist results in suitcases full of cash being searched for by various groups throughout the Rocky Mountains.Impaled on a stalactite