#NoMercyNovember2021
My Watchlist for No Mercy November 2021. (@CampCthulhu)
No Mercy November is back for blood this year! You know the drill: we take no prisoners! It's an all-month merry massacre for the masses!
No Mercy November is back for blood this year! You know the drill: we take no prisoners! It's an all-month merry massacre for the masses!
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- DirectorDavid HindsStarsRichard BoultonTammy DennisSteven GarbettPsychopath Charles Scavolini escapes the mental institution and returns to his home. Now occupied by a gang of partying teenagers, Scavolini takes back his property with brutal blood lust.Day 1 - Monday the 1st
Mini-Review: A late 90's British indie video slasher from Dark Horizon and SRS Cinema's 'Retro Line' here. This is just a British knockoff of Halloween (1978) for the most part. After he escapes from a mental asylum, a psycho killer makes his way back to his hometown to murder some more. This claims to be based on a true story (yeah, sure), but this story just follows all of the plot beats from Halloween almost exactly (it's so barebones that the movie itself pretty much has no personality). Nearly everything that happens up until Scavolini returns to his former home is very plain and by-the-numbers (and, unlike Halloween which also is pretty mundane until a certain point, this isn't very interesting or entertaining - it's all just unfun (I know it's not a real word) filler there to occupy screentime until the murders begin). The runtime only barely earns its 'feature-length' status, and the pacing is pretty rotten until the third act (basically when the killing starts).
The cast does seem mostly amateur, but they actually aren't too bad here (the characters themselves, however, are rather bland and boring - Scavolini never speaks a word, but I was cheering him on during his rampage). Speaking of him, Charles Scavolini is also the killer. He's basically the Shape (with a dash of Jason Voorhees). His main disguise is a melted mask and a boilersuit (sound familiar?), and, true to the title, he does indeed favor garden tools as his main arsenal (mostly a pair of hedge shears). Before he arrives at the house, he's mostly shown in POV shots (like in Friday the 13th (1980)) and his heavy breathing is prominently heard (just like Michael). He has no reason whatsoever for killing the teens, but he is given a reason for why he murdered his wife (see: adultery). The kills are bloody and sort of gory, but rather boring and unimaginative (they also suffer from the horrible lighting, which makes some of them incredibly hard to make out (more on this later) - 'corkscrewed' is my highlight). The climax and ending are both pretty weak and abrupt (and the 'post-credits' scene seems to imply that there's more to come - which there isn't, though).
Final thoughts, first off, SRS put this out as an upscaled transfer from its video source, so the quality is extremely bad, blown out, and littered with defects and glitches (I mention this because it's difficult to properly judge some of the production details due to this transfer - I'll still try to give my best impressions based on what I could make out, lol). The makeup, costuming, and special effects actually seem fairly fine for something like this (you can't exactly expect the moon here, but these visuals do get the job done - I wish the video quality wasn't garbage, so I could better assess these visuals, but it is what it is). Regardless of the quality, the camerawork is largely trash in here (it goes out of focus multiple times, the cameraman himself appears in multiple shots, the composition is haphazardly framed, and the lighting is abhorrently bad - so bad that some scenes are so dark that it's impossible to determine what's even happening). I got five stray shout outs going out to the misspelling in the opening 'disclaimer' ('sentanced'), the Ghostface mask cameo, the knockoff Halloween theme (in the opening credits), Mike's freakin' sombrero, and the kill which is exclusive to the ending credits montage (no idea why they did that). SRS puts out a lot of these old indie trash horror movies, and this is no different (the coolest thing about this movie is the commissioned artwork for the poster - that poster is a ten, this movie is like a three at best).
Rating: 3/10 (Bad)
Best Character: Charles Scavolini (Peter Hicken)
Massacre Count: 14 (Overall: 339) - DirectorGregory BlairStarsAndy GatesNichole BagbyDavid LeeperA gathering of friends goes awry when an uninvited guest appears. With a pickax. And an attitude.Day 2 - Tuesday the 2nd
Mini-Review: A late 2010's satire slasher from 'SGL' here. Well, this, uh, this certainly wasn't what I expected (or hoped for) here. A group of friends throw a backyard party which is attacked by a pickaxe wielding maniac. Not to get too far into it, but I hated this story (it is indeed a satire of the slasher genre, so things aren't what they seem to be). I don't hate parodies or satires of the slasher genre, but I do hate when they're poorly done (and this one is just too contrived and stupid here - this does seem in part to trying to keep the story limited to one location, but, either way, I hated it and I especially hated where it goes in the third act, which pretty much goes completely off the rails). The runtime is a little over an hour (and just barely qualifies as feature-length - they have to resort to including bloopers and outtakes in the ending credits to further pad out the runtime), but the pacing is mostly rotten (it becomes hard to care after a certain point and you start counting down the minutes until it's over).
The performances are largely amateur hour and mostly bad in here (the characters themselves are so insufferable and annoying that I actually considered shutting it off several times - I have no favorite and no shouts outs because I hated everyone here). The killer doesn't have a disguise and uses a pickaxe as his main weapon (he's pretty much the standard 'escaped mental patient' trope here (or is he?)). He never speaks and doesn't really do anything noteworthy either (the 'reveal' with him is absolutely dreadful and actually pissed me off). There's also 'something else' that happens, but I'd rather not go too in depth about that angle (which also pissed me off even further). The kills are minimal and sort of bloody, but mostly just total trash (there's only two, and I hated both of them). The climax features the aforementioned 'angle' (a twist, I guess), and that angle turned me super sour on this whole movie very fast (really lazy and extremely stupid). The ending itself is sort of just whatever (it's fairly unsatisfying and the fact that these annoying characters didn't get any sort of 'comeuppance' left me apathetic).
Final thoughts, the makeup and special effects are the usual low budget trash here (especially near the end after the 'twist' (very difficult to dance around what this is without giving it away, by the way) - the blood is sometimes practical, but also sometimes terrible CGI). The camerawork does have a 'professional' look to it (mostly due to the cameras used, I suppose), but the cinematography itself is rather boring (with uninspired composition). I pretty much hated the writing, and the comedy is mostly a miss with me in here (the satire itself is lame and the actors' delivery and timing doesn't help it either - the script has too much cringy, geeky and meme-y dialogue for my tastes). That's about all I've got, frankly (I could keep trashing this movie, but I don't really care - I nearly fell asleep near the end of it). I got one stray shout out going out to Reena's cake (no, not that kind of cake - get your mind out of the gutter). This is pure no budget trash without any real redeeming qualities (it's garbage, family - but, for me, it's extra disgusting because of that freakin' twist). File it under 'useless'.
Rating: 1/10 (Useless)
Best Character: None
Massacre Count: 2 (Overall: 341) - DirectorBruno MatteiGilbert RousselStarsLaura GemserGabriele TintiUrsula FloresFour escaped male convicts seize control of a women's prison and proceed to terrorize the inmates, one of whom is reporter Emanuelle, incarcerated on trumped-up charges.Day 3 - Wednesday the 3rd
Mini-Review: An early 80's Italian women-in-prison exploitation film from Shout! Factory and Bruno Mattei, which is the eighth and final installment of the Black Emanuelle series. Yes, it's some proper Mattei (with Claudio Fragasso on the screenplay) trashsploitation here. A group of death row inmates take control of a women's prison where they were being temporarily housed at. The story here is beyond trashy, but I can't say that I was ever bored with it (every other scene has some bizarre thing happening, and it never really dwells too much on the details either). I've never seen any 'Emanuelle' film at all (from any series, so this was my first one ever), but she herself didn't play too big of a role in here (she's just sort of there and is fairly passive throughout the storyline - despite being featured a good deal). It's a tight runtime with very fast pacing here (most scenes don't really get time to breathe - it just jumps from one plot point to the next without much regard).
The cast is very over the top and quite campy in here (they're all dubbed, I guess, but some of their performances do still shine through - 'Blade' is my favorite, but shout outs to 'Crazy Boy', Albina, Colleen and Laura Gemser as Emanuelle). 'Crazy Boy' Henderson is also the main villain. He leads the other death row inmates, and gives an extremely hammy and gratuitous performance (his eyes are almost always on the verge of bursting out of his head). He's got the same goal as the others, which is escaping the prison and fleeing the country (he gets what he wants through the use of hostages, naturally). His cohorts are the other inmates; Blade, Geronimo, and O'Hara. They all get sent to the women's prison because their transport vehicle was attacked, and that was the only place for them to stay on short notice. They are pretty lively and colorful, but they're really all just the worst cretins. The climax and ending are both fairly underwhelming with a disappointing final confrontation (between Harrison and Crazy Boy).
Final thoughts, I mentioned the dubbing earlier, and, chiming in here, it's really bad with horrible syncing (the actual voices aren't too bad, but it just seems really poorly cobbled together). There is some blood and gore in here, but it's minimal (the blood and viscera exploding into Crazy Boy's face is probably the goriest showing). The editing is really rough, but does benefit the pacing (some super sharp and haphazard cuts in here). This being some exploitation trash means that there has to be some nudity (and there is, lots of it in fact, which is largely female - including one of the cheesiest sex montages that I've ever seen). The score is hilariously inappropriate and actually awesome in here (I enjoyed the main theme the most - kind of groovy and synthy). The camerawork and other technical aspects didn't really impress me or have anything worth noting here (it seems rather bland, frankly). I got five stray shout outs going out to the weird performance poetry intro (sure?), the impromptu arm wrestling match (Emanuelle vs. Albina), Irene's bizarre blowup doll (named 'Bobby'), the car chase sequence (actually pretty well done), and Blade dancing with Irene, Laura and Bobby (LOL). Well, Mattei knows how to make some pretty entertaining garbage, and this is more or less exactly what you think it is (some really absurd but fairly entertaining 80's trash here).
Rating: 6/10 (Decent)
Best Character: Helmut "Blade" von Bauer (Pierangelo Pozzato)
Massacre Count: 18 (Overall: 359) - DirectorJim WynorskiStarsDominique SwainTraci LordsChristine NguyenWhen a fracking environmental accident rips apart the earth's crust, the resulting hole lets out prehistoric sharks from underground that target a group of women and trap them in a cabin.Day 4 - Thursday the 4th
Mini-Review: A mid 2010's sharksploitation monster movie women-in-prison mashup from Shout! Factory and Jim Wynorski, which is the ninth installment of the Massacre series. I mean, I guess this is supposed to be apart of the Massacre series (it features 'alternate' versions of some of the characters from those movies), but, unlike that series, this isn't a slasher and is more of a monster movie here. Following a daring prison break, some female inmates find themselves as the prey of a massive swamp shark, which can also travel on land. If you're familiar with Wynorski's previous offerings, then you already know what to expect here (and you're not wrong either - this is straight-to-video trash all the way). It's your typical backwoods setting with a story that is written around where they have to film at (which is very limited). That said, I suppose this story does conform to the usual 'Massacre' series structure (just with a monster instead of a murderer). The length and pacing seem alright for the most part (the only parts that feel out of place are the intercuts with detectives - made even worse by the fact that those scenes don't really amount to much).
The cast ranges from expectedly amateur to somewhat competent in here (some of them stumble over their lines, some of them have stiff and robotic delivery, some of them give fairly serviceable and believable performances - Traci Lords as Patterson is probably my favorite, but shout outs to Honey, Adam and Chris de Christopher as Professor Orville Ketchum (yes, he's a professor now, lol)). The monsters are some kind of mutant sharks that can travel on land (by burrowing underground). They do have an 'origin' (which is related to fracking and some 'ancient' underground seas, or something), but none of these explanations are particularly coherent or make any kind of reasonable sense (like, there's no reason given for why these sharks can travel on land - they just can, etc.). These sharks are entirely CGI creatures, and they sometimes look decent, but sometimes look really rotten (overall, they look way better than some other sharksploitation flicks that I've seen). The climax and ending are both pretty upbeat, but not fairly predictable.
Final thoughts, the visual effects rely largely on CGI in here (and it's, uh, 'above average', I'd say (probably TV quality CGI, it reminded me of The Flash (2014)) - the sharks are mostly well blended with their burrowing and swimming looking rather decent, but the blood, gore and body parts look pretty awful). The camerawork has a 'porno'-like vibe about it (a staple of Wynorski's works, I guess - plenty of terribly composed and lit shots). I hated all of the props in the movie (especially the guns, which were all obvious airsoft replicas). I also hated the writing in here (which is mainly really stupid and childish dialogue - Honey in particular has some really rotten and braindead lines, like 'this is a tooth!' or her extra dumb 'catchphrase'). I got two stray shout outs going out to Honey's gun changing from a Beretta to a 1911 between scenes (terrible continuity, but it does stay as a 1911 for the remainder of the movie) and Patterson's non sequitur conversation about that 'vintage coke bottle' (literally, what?). Wynorski apparently tried to get this movie funded through a Kickstarter campaign and failed miserably (after seeing the final product here, it's pretty obvious why this failed). This is pure trash - I hated the script, and I hated what Wynorski did to the legendary Orville Ketchum (shame on you, Jim). It's got a three here on IMDb, and I'd say that's about accurate for this.
Rating: 3/10 (Bad)
Best Character: Detective Patterson (Traci Lords)
Massacre Count: 9 (Overall: 368) - DirectorScott KirkpatrickStarsMarina ResaElio MardiniDusty ProbertFive teens struggle for their lives after becoming stranded in a cannibal infested mountain town.Day 5 - Friday the 5th
Mini-Review: An early 2010's backwoods slasher from MKSK here. This is pretty much just a shameless ripoff of The Texas Chain Saw Massacre (1974) here (and they even reference that title in their 'alternate' title: 'The Texas Roadside Massacre'). After getting stranded in a backwoods town, some teens become the victims of a group of cannibalistic restaurant workers. As I was saying, if you've seen Texas Chainsaw, then you've seen this (it's basically a 'modern day' remake of that - the story follows all of the same plot beats here). The only places where it diverges is the 'brainwashing' angle and the ending (more on this later). Needless to say, this didn't impress me very much and I didn't care for this 'spin' on that story (in addition to its lack of originality, it's pretty lackluster in its delivery as well). It has the same pacing as Texas Chainsaw until the final act (so, it's actually not too bad in this regard), but that third act drags on for too long (especially when it becomes apparent what the eventual outcome will be).
The cast is your standard amateur hour troupe here with some of them stumbling over their lines, and a couple of them with stale delivery (Karen is probably the best and most lively, so she's my favorite, but light shout outs to Gus and Jimmy). The killers are all stand-ins for the Sawyer family from Texas Chainsaw (I don't think they're all related, but there's three of them and they're pretty much the Cook, the Hitchhiker and Leatherface - the only one missing is Grandpa). They run a barbecue rib restaurant which, of course, serves human meat as their main course (just like W. E. Slaughter BBQ). The Leatherface stand-in (who is unnamed) serves as the main killer here (and, yeah, he's just Leatherface without a mask for the most part). The other two guys did show some personality, but it was about what you'd expect (one of them literally does the same trick that the Cook in Texas Chainsaw did to Sally: picking her up under the guise of being friendly, and then betraying her shortly thereafter). The kills are mostly bloodless and kind of trash, frankly ('burying the hatchet' is my highlight). The climax and ending are both very dark and fairly unsatisfying.
Final thoughts, since there's no gore, most of the makeup and special effects are centered on the injuries and other similar details (they definitely look low budget, but, from what I could tell (lots of them are showcased in darkened scenes), seem somewhat alright - the hypothermia damage looks fine-ish, but the 'lobotomy' scars aren't as convincing). The camerawork has a similar vibe to Texas Chainsaw's cinematography (not really a compliment, it's quite derivative with a boring color palette - lots of lingering shots of the environment and other assorted highway establishing shots (the only thing missing was the dead armadillo on the roadside, lol)). The soundtrack is sort of decent, but I wasn't sure if it was 'original' (as in composed specifically for this film) or licensed tracks (it is credited to a 'composer', but I'm still not sure, lol). I got two stray shout outs going out to the classic cameraman appearing in multiple reflection shots (reveal those mistakes, yo) and Jimmy singing along to the radio (yep, lol). This was my first time watching this, and I've pretty much seen it already (and done much, much better). It's an inferior knockoff, which only really adds a couple of new wrinkles to the plot (and those wrinkles aren't enough to keep it from being a rather bad showing here).
Rating: 3/10 (Bad)
Best Character: Karen (Marina Resa)
Massacre Count: 5 (Overall: 373) - DirectorJames L. BillsStarsEly LaMayJohn Blyth BarrymoreCalista CarradineA cannibalistic madman stalks a stretch of desert highway, preying on beautiful hitchhikers.Day 6 - Saturday the 6th
Mini-Review: A late 2010's backwoods slasher from Retrofocus and Green Apple here. I guess they were trying to emulate an old school 80's slasher with this here (and they tried a little too hard, honestly). As she travels to Colorado by foot, a woman is abducted by a maniac so that he can use her for his organ harvesting ring. That's the story, and it doesn't stray too far from that setup here (it does take some time before Sally gets captured, and between that time the killer hunts down other hitchhikers). I enjoyed the first half (before Sally gets captured), but I didn't really care for the second half (when she and the killer have these weird interactions - I did like Sally and Woody's scenes, though). The way the subplots (like Woody and his divorce, that guy and the prostitute, the Sheriff's investigation, etc.) intercut with the main story give this structure a vignette-like feeling (I suppose this works in favor of the pacing, though, since there's always something interesting happening).
The cast ranges from total amateur hour to some decent veterans in here (Woody annoyed me at first, but he ended up being my favorite - shout outs to Sally, Sheriff Marks, and, the featured player, John Barrymore as Slim). Slim is also the killer. His personality is largely affable (and he sticks with it, too - Barrymore's performance also never really goes too far over the top either), and he doesn't really have an 'origin' (he's got some 'relationship' with a 'doctor', and that's all the information given). His motivation is providing for his organ trafficking ring (he murders hitchhikers and steals their organs to sell to a black market doctor - he also has a job at a diner, and (surprise, surprise) 'disposes' of his victims' bodies by turning them into chili). The kills are decently bloody and somewhat creative ('the eye splinter', which is filmed exactly like in Zombie (1979), is my highlight). The climax and ending are both rather disappointing and predictable (especially the last scene).
Final thoughts, the makeup and visual effects have some great showings, but also some really rotten ones (some of the gore and prop body parts look the part, but there's a few that aren't very convincing - the final gore shot was pretty unimpressive). There is some nudity, but it's mostly topless shots (there's also one super cheesy, softcore-level sex scene) - on the other hand, there's plenty of ass shots (true to the poster - it's not an exaggeration to say that almost every girl gets at least one). The score sounds downright porno-like at certain times (I wasn't really feeling it - I get why they did it, but it was a little too 'on-the-nose' to me). I hated the annoying 'film wear' filter that occasionally appears on some scenes (this is one of the things that I hate the most about these 'retro'-styled slashers - those filters never have the intended look, and just come off as tacky). I got three stray shout outs going out to Woody throwing his toupee out the window (yes), Woody swinging that axe around (yes, yes), and Woody getting high behind the tent (yes, yes, yes). Well, this isn't too bad, and might even be a bit above average (normally, I'd probably give something like this a six, but it let me down on a few too many aspects, so it's gonna get a five from me).
Rating: 5/10 (Average)
Best Character: Woody (James Bartholet)
Massacre Count: 8 (Overall: 381) - DirectorJohn CarterStarsDavid BroadnaxRita JenretteTom CantrellAmericans on vacation in the Caribbean take a tour of a nearby island at night and watch a local voodoo ritual. Soon after, they find themselves stranded on the island and under attack by unseen foes. One by one they meet violent ends.Day 7 - Sunday the 7th (SLASHER SUNDAY)
Mini-Review: A mid 80's supernatural (or is it? it isn't, lol) slasher from Troma and Vinegar Syndrome here. Well, obviously this isn't what the title suggests, but it isn't a total bait-and-switch here (there is a 'zombie', there is an island, and there is indeed a massacre, lol). While on vacation on a Caribbean island, a group of tourists get mixed up in a conspiracy and then get hunted down by a mysterious, and reeking, murderer. This isn't really a, uh, 'traditional' zombie movie (if you're expecting survivors facing off against a horde of zombies, then you'd better look elsewhere), and it's really more of a 'crime slasher' here (the crime being that conspiracy, of course). The setup and initial playout (with that voodoo ritual) make it seem like it's heading in a certain direction, but it shifts gears at about the midway point (thankfully). I did enjoy this story, and it's enhanced by the tropical setting (although the final act takes place at a mansion). The length is about average, and the pacing feels fine (and actually rather fast at first) in here.
The cast isn't the finest (it is a Troma slasher exploitation flick after all), but I actually really enjoyed the performances in here (they aren't over the top and the characterizations are fairly good - Paul is my favorite, but shout outs to Sandy, Steve, and Joe). The killer (referred to as the 'Creature' in the credits) wears a disguise that looks like a ghillie suit (and evidently has a scent that smells like 'death'), and they use a variety of methods to kill (including traps). Their origin and motivation are based around the 'conspiracy' (hard to go into details about this without spoiling the twist - so, I won't, lol). So, uh, about that 'zombie' (and there is only one), it's like a voodoo zombie, and is shown being 'resurrected' during the ritual early on in the film (the tourists witness this ritual and it's presented like some sort of 'island attraction' - they put on a spectacle about it, but the zombie does seem to be revived). The kills are very bloody and mean-spirited with some brutal gore ('don't lose your head!' is my highlight). The climax and ending weren't exactly what I expected, but they're still satisfying enough (although the final scene is rather dark).
Final thoughts, the makeup and special effects have the classic 80's style to them (low budget practical that get down and dirty - the gore looks pretty nasty and the zombie's appearance, along with the effects associated with it, are all fairly adequate (I especially liked its extending nails and ashy 'coating')). This being an exploitation joint from Troma means that there's got to be some nudity on the table (and there is, and it gets straight to the point in the opening scene - it's mostly Sandy, and it's also mostly topless shots, but there's some ass shots from random girls as well). I didn't care for the camerawork in here (which has some bewilderingly crappy angles - especially during the ritual sequence, like what am I even supposed to be paying attention to there, anyway?). I got four stray shout outs going out to Joe turning his head and opening his eyes and mouth (lol), Steve's ascot (which makes him look like Fred Jones), the score (supplied by Harry Manfredini), and our friendly sink lizard (absolutely, lol). This has a pretty pathetic rating here on IMDb, which, after watching it, I find to be rather unfortunate (this isn't really a 'good' picture, but it is a pretty fun and entertaining offering here, which, as always, is a good enough reason for me to award it that score). Last note: special mention to the wonderful transfer done by Vinegar Syndrome for this (it looks and sounds great - another top notch job here).
Rating: 7/10 (Good)
Best Character: Paul (David Broadnax)
Massacre Count: 19 (Overall: 400) - DirectorCorbin TimbrookStarsShelly MartinezNaomi CruzDiana Prince7 unlucky girls are about to experience a film shoot where they will play real-life victims in a real-life horror film.Day 8 - Monday the 8th
Mini-Review: A late 2000's video slasher from FilmCanal here. So, this isn't a porno slasher, but it's totally a porno slasher (well, it's not a 'porno parody' - it is a straight up horror). A slimy porn director lures multiple starlets into starring in his films, but, unbeknownst to them, something more sinister and deadly awaits them. This is one of those movies with a completely idiotic plot where the characters have to be total morons in order to fall for it (indeed, they're all dumber than a box of rocks - the setting alone, which is the seediest warehouse I've seen, should've been a tipoff of their fates, but they just ignore it, lol). Either way, I hated this stupid story (it's an insult to everyone's intelligence, lol - listen, slashers don't always have the cleverest stories or the smartest characters, but this showing here is beyond illogical). One positive I'll note is that the length and the pacing feel about right here (it does start to unravel at around the midway point, though - you'll know it when it happens).
The cast is mostly awful with poor delivery and wooden performances (some (most?) of these characters are being played by actual pornstars, too - Missy (played by Darcy the Mail Girl under her 'real name', I guess) is probably my favorite, but shout outs to the Editor, Malfini, and Richard Little (get it?) as Tiny). 'Brute' (which is what he's identified as) is the killer. His disguise looks relatively low budget and unremarkable (it's some type of white mask which looks like a strait-jacket for his face, lol - along with some blood spattered clothes). He seems to favor a sledgehammer as his main weapon (but does use his bare hands and a hunting knife as well). I didn't really care much for him, and there's not really much to him either (no real origin or any given motivation beyond him being 'likes-to-kill' guy). The kills are sometimes bloody, but fairly underwhelming ultimately ('the back stabber' is my highlight). The climax and ending are pretty predictable and mostly a disappointment.
Final thoughts, there's barely any gore (or even any injuries), but there are still some special effects showings in here (and they're largely lackluster, trashy, and too unconvincing - my highlighted kill is probably their best effort with the knife going through that victim and the wall). There's (obviously) tons of nudity in here (right from the very start with the first scene being a gratuitous shower scene - there's also plenty of lingerie, topless, and ass shots (I suppose it does live up to its title in this aspect)). I hated the super bad and hilariously inappropriate soundtrack in here (there's not much to comment on with this - it just sucks, and even the 'imitation' porno music is a failure). The rest of the technical aspects all have that low budget look and vibe about them (and thus didn't really impress me very much either). I got three stray shout outs going out to Malfini's horrible fake mustache (and also just horrible beard, lol), that abhorrent floating black bar to obscure that picture (just blur it out at that point), and Missy and Tiny's weirdo photoshoot (probably the funniest scene, tbh). I watched this to see Darcy (or Kasey), and I guess it sort of delivered on that front, but, as a complete package, this is too stupid and trashy to be worth a damn (it just doesn't have enough crowd-pleasing elements to be worthwhile, frankly).
Rating: 3/10 (Bad)
Best Character: Missy (Kasey Poteet)
Massacre Count: 14 (Overall: 414) - DirectorBob ClarkStarsAlicia WatsonErin BrownCourtney RiggsA young woman starting a new life is forced to take extreme measures against those around her after things go violently awry.Day 9 - Tuesday the 9th
Mini-Review: A late 2010's rape and revenge slasher from Midnight Releasing here. There's not much to this at the end of the day here (the actual 'massacre' doesn't even happen until the last twenty minutes or so). After getting tricked and raped, a stripper goes on a murderous rampage at her workplace. That's the setup for the 'main' conflict (and where the title comes from), but that setup doesn't happen until near the start of the third act (everything up until then feels like slice of life, honestly - we're offered an insight on the stripper's downbeat life, which leads up to the 'incident'). The story isn't too bad, though, and the characters are somewhat interesting (I enjoyed the dynamic between the lead and her friend). The length runs a bit long for a slasher (at about an hour and forty-five minutes), and the pacing works within the 'slice of life' framing (so the action is rather light and the kill pacing is pretty rotten - there are some kills peppered in from the 'real' villains in the movie).
The cast are mostly serviceable to kind of decent at time in here (they all feel pretty amateur, especially at first, but, strangely enough, they seem to improve as the film goes on - Megan is my favorite, but shout outs to Jazz, Amanda, and Cliff (not Craig)). There's multiple killer in this, but Megan is the main one. She doesn't wear a disguise or have a main weapon (she does assemble an arsenal before she heads off to the strip club to get payback). Her motivation and origin are revenge-based, and are shown with the extended buildup to her rape at that party (I think you can pretty much guess who this goes down, but this event does indeed lead her to committing the titular incident). The other villains are her co-workers at the club (who are shown committing cruel murders against their rival strippers in the meantime). The kills are somewhat bloody and gory, but relatively uninspired ('the face fixer', which is probably the goriest, is my highlight). The climax and ending fulfill the 'criteria' for this subgenre (mostly the 'revenge' part), and are mildly satisfying.
Final thoughts, the makeup and special effects look very low budget and kind of crappy (the gore isn't very convincing and has some poor showings (especially the 'crowbar rape' - trust me, you'll know it when it happens) - the eye gouge looks alright, though). There is of course a good deal of nudity in here (a lot of topless, strip show (naturally), and lingerie shots). I didn't like the camerawork in here (which is very boring with bad composition and a lame color grading - it actually looks like it was filmed with a phone camera, and I wouldn't be surprised if it was). I really hated the sound mixing and editing, which is flat out terrible and super rotten (the dialogue is very low, it almost sounds like the actors are mumbling, and the music and foley are absurdly loud and obnoxious - it sort of smooths out over time, but is still pretty awful). I got two stray shout outs going out to the weird meta commentary about trash horror (h u b r i s) and Cliff getting rejected (and shoving that girl in the pool, lol). I understand what they were going for with this, but I disliked this execution (there is still some moderate entertainment value to be had here, so I guess a five will suffice for now).
Rating: 5/10 (Average)
Best Character: Megan (Alicia Watson)
Massacre Count: 13 (Overall: 427) - DirectorJason WinnStarsSara BessEvan Taylor WilliamsMelissa KunnapSet in 1992, during a hallucinogenic drug nightmare infused with illicit partying and forbidden sex, young ravers discover the murderous world of the DeadThirsty.Day 10 - Wednesday the 10th
Note: Also known as "Rave Party Massacre".
Mini-Review: A late 2010's period slasher from Breaking Glass here. This is one of your standard low budget single location horror films here (the only real angles it's got are the conspiracy thing, and the period setting). In 1992, a couple attends a rave party at an abandoned hospital, and, after getting drugged, find themselves as the prey of a masked murderer. The story here really sets up this weirdo 'conspiracy' angle, which, frankly, is pretty terrible and contrived (this angle also ties into why this film is set in 1992 - there's stock footage of George H. W. Bush and Bill Clinton used in here). I will say, though, that there is plenty of rave partying (so, that aspect is at least covered thoroughly). Apart from the setup, it's pretty straightforward, and the entirety of it does indeed take place at that dilapidated hospital (which also makes it easier for them to 'portray' this time period). Overall, I pretty much hated the story here, and it goes through a whole lot for a whole little. The length is on the shorter side, but the pacing is fairly mediocre (lots of time partying and meandering around to pad out the runtime).
The cast is definitely amateur hour here, and none of them really standout. (Rachel, whose character I hate but performance I enjoyed, is my favorite - the rest are sort of 'whatever'). The killer wears an animal mask and a black hoodie as their main disguise, and they seem to prefer a machete as their main weapon (the mask looks decent, but everything else about them is pretty bland - especially their personality after the killer reveal). Their origin and motivation is shown in their reveal, and is rather disappointing (there's actually two reveals in regards to the killer, and they're both pretty pathetic). There's also a 'terrorist group' (called 'DeadThirsty') which is involved with the 'conspiracy' angle (their deal is something involving the 'New World Order', and the explanation for their involvement with the events at hand has literally no meaning - don't expect any sort of satisfaction from that). The kills are bloody and sometimes gory, but not particularly imaginative ('a knife under the throat' is my highlight). The climax and ending both suck and are mostly a letdown (from the killer reveal to the final confrontation to that guy glancing directly into the camera - I hated the whole ordeal).
Final thoughts, the visual effects are about half mediocre and half decent-ish (these aren't the worst showings I've seen, but they're also not anything to write home about - some of the injuries look alright). I disliked the sound mixing in here (which had its dialogue too loud during the rave scenes). There's some interesting camerawork in here - especially for an indie low budget slasher (lots of red lighting and some Dutch angles - Rachel in that body cabinet is probably the highlight). I really enjoyed the abandoned hospital setting here (which has some nice set design and decoration - well, with the exception of the flickering lights, which I hated after a certain point). And yeah, I didn't care for the writing in here (aside from the story, I also hated pretty much all of the characters, and their dialogue was just really basic). I got one stray shout out going out to the full-blown Charlie Kelly conspiracy wall (in the killer's lair). There was an effort here to be a little different than the average slasher, but the execution of these ideas failed (there are a couple of bright spots in here, but overall its efforts don't really elevate it above other indie VOD slashers).
Rating: 3/10 (Bad)
Best Character: Rachel (Sara Bess)
Massacre Count: 6 (Overall: 433) - DirectorJoseph D. ClarkStarsJoseph D. ClarkRockford VarcoePeter Mehren6 teenagers go traveling in the woods, to have a crazy private party. They don't know they are followed by a psychopath. Slowly the party is turning in to a blood bath, when the killer slaughters them all one by one.Day 11 - Thursday the 11th
Mini-Review: An early 2000's psychological backwoods video slasher from Acheron here. This here, this right here? Just forget about it! A group of friends travel to a beach near the woods for a party, and discover a bloodthirsty maniac awaiting them. Super dry story here for about the first hour of the runtime (and that runtime is only about an hour and fifteen minutes). The setup is basically the entire story (until the ending that is, which I'll cover later on). There's some lengthy dream sequences that appear early on (which is where the psychological angle comes into play), but these sequences don't really amount to anything (they sort of play into the climax, but also not really - like Sandy having visions of her father). It's mostly just your standard backwoods slasher fare, but it almost has like a satire or parody vibe about it (I was nearly convinced after a certain point that it had to be, but I suppose it isn't). I disliked the story overall, but it is pretty easy to understand and somewhat timely here (also a rather short length - even with the outtakes to pad it out).
The cast is your usual amateur hour, probably their first time on camera, crew in here (it is an indie slasher after all, but these actors don't do much with what little they're given (and some of them get pretty chewy with the scenery, too) - Jeff, played by the writer-director, is probably my favorite, but shout outs to Jake and Sandy, who is the closest to a 'final girl' in the movie). The killer doesn't wear a disguise (they're portrayed largely in POV shots until their reveal), and they don't have a main weapon (although they seem to favor a chainsaw). Their origin and motivation literally makes no sense whatsoever, but that seems to be by design (as you'll see from the killer reveal). Their personality is your typical unhinged maniac and that's about all there is to them (even after it's all said and done in the final, final, final confrontation - they're still just a total unrelenting lunatic). The kills are super bloody with some trashy gore ('hacked to bits' is my highlight). The climax and ending are a smorgasbord of twists and turns (there's like three or four twists), and each of them gets more ridiculous than the last (but the final one, which happens during the credits, is actually really dark - and sort of clever?). I'm not gonna lie, I actually really enjoyed the absurdity on display in the ending (it's the highlight of the entire movie, frankly).
Final thoughts, the writing here is mostly trash, but it does contain one very bold (and kind of stupid, lol) decision, which is sort of a shocking moment (it pertains to the first victim in the 'massacre', and that's all I'll say). As for all those 'dream' sequences, they go on for far too long, but one of them in particular is actually kind of freaky (in a bizarre way - the way that Randy, or maybe it was Mandy?, was moving around looks so ridiculously weird). The visual effects are largely craptastic CGI in here (some practical effects are used for the blood, but the lion's share is a blend of CGI and really horrible, and bewilderingly unconvincing, chroma key - it looks beyond trashy with the worse being the shot of the beach). There is some light nudity and indeed bikini shots, but it's not anything special (pretty underwhelming, honestly). There's also some ultra cheesy, and borderline parody-like, sex scenes (I hated all of these scenes - these scenes are also what made me think that this was a satire slasher). I got four stray shout outs going out to the prodco logo playing twice in the opening (what?), that abhorrent CGI butterfly (why even bother, tbh?), the plethora of urination scenes (there are a lot), and the impromptu music video in that field (complete with MTV styled info appearing on screen). This is definitely straight-to-video 2000's era garbage here (it does seem like it's trying to be more than that, but pretty much fails). This is a bad film (maybe even a terrible one), but I'll give this a four because I did get a kick out of the ending.
Rating: 4/10 (Mediocre)
Best Character: Jeff (Joseph Clark)
Massacre Count: 1 (Overall: 434) - DirectorAiden DillardStarsTed VernonKatie RotoloNicole SodenA group of beautiful bikini-clad girls go on a vacation in the swamp of the Florida Everglades, never to return.Day 12 - Friday the 12th
Mini-Review: A mid 2010's backwoods slasher from Troma here. This is apart of Troma's 'Team Troma' series, and it's pretty easy to see why. A group of friends head into the Florida Everglades for a vacation, and soon find themselves as the prey of a maniac killer. Yeah, you've seen this story before (probably done way better, too), and this doesn't really do much to stand out from its peers (the only real angle I can think of is the 'dramatization' presentation - that's how it's prefaced (and how it opens with the title card and the accompanying first scene - that scene is of course rather ridiculous and parody-like). I don't have much to comment on with this story, frankly (I guess it's alright, but it's just really plain and very telegraphed - which I'll elaborate on more later). The length is short (clocking in at about an hour and ten minutes), and the pacing is somewhat timely (most of it moves fast, but it does get slowed down by some lengthy flashback sequences).
The cast gives some pretty typical performances that you'd see in a Troma flick (basically amateur hour with some wooden and lifeless delivery (Ron isn't even attempting to act), or maybe even below that, honestly - Tonya, who gives one of the only committed performances in the movie, is my favorite, but shout outs to Claire and Sandy). 'Coowahchohee' is the killer. The 'legend' in the movie claims that this character is 'supernatural' (some kind of Native American spirit), but it's blatantly obvious what's happening (here's where it becomes telegraphed - the killer's identity is barely concealed at all). He does wear a disguise (which is some kind of 'tribal' outfit and 'war paint'), and favors a tomahawk as his main weapon. He behaves in a stereotypical manner, and his main goal seems to be to 'acquire' a new wife. I can't say that I cared for him, one way or the other, but he is very over the top. The kills have a good amount of blood and gore, but are rather basic ('the spine ripper' is my highlight). The climax isn't too surprising (especially the killer reveal), and it finishes on a bizarre note.
Final thoughts, the makeup and special effects look a bit better than what you'd probably expect from a Troma flick (so, slightly above average, I suppose - the injuries and gore are adequate, but the fire in the camper sticks out like a sore thumb). This being some Troma trash means that nudity is back on the menu (and it is, front loaded with a topless shot and some gratuitous ass shots). With the exploitation aspects out of the way, the rest of the technical aspects are pretty mediocre and uninteresting (the writing is subpar with an odd structure, the camerawork is bland but does have some decent color grading, the sound design has a competent mix and the foley compliments the 'dramatization' angle). I got one stray shout out going out to our animal friends we made along the way (including the ominous owl and the baby gator). I wish I had more to say about this, but it's a fairly mediocre Troma offering here. It doesn't have enough schlock to put it over and mostly comes up short here.
Rating: 4/10 (Mediocre)
Best Character: Tonya (Jenny Scordamaglia)
Massacre Count: 12 (Overall: 446) - DirectorLawrence W. Nelson IIStarsTaya ParkerDiana PrinceChristina SchimmelStacy Phelps doesn't want to be anywhere near her abusive ex-husband the weekend that he's getting out of prison. With her best friends by her side, they decide to go away to her parent's beach house. Soon, they will be in a fight to survive the night.Day 13 - Saturday the 13th
Mini-Review: A mid 2010's backwoods slasher from Green Apple here. I watched this to see Diana Prince, and she is indeed in this movie. A woman and her friends head out to a beach house for a getaway, but then find themselves at the mercy of a pair of psychos. There's also a couple of subplots, but they're all pretty insignificant (the main ones are the sister who is filming a short film and the abusive husband who gets released from prison - neither of these amount to anything, and feel like filler). The main story is mostly just meandering around until the blatantly obvious 'twist' happens (and then the 'real' movie can begin). And that real movie is just a real letdown (I really disliked how it played out, especially the events that follow the 'twist' - for reasons that should be obvious). We've also got some fairly rotten pacing with a runtime that is padded out of its own mind (there's so many scenes that just linger on the same image for nearly full minutes - tons of filler with egregious establishing and scenic shots).
The cast is below amateur level and are barely even acting in here (never mind the characters themselves, who I hated, we spend so much time with these annoying dregs that I seriously considered shutting it off several times (the absolute worst part is the extended bit with those three girls in the hot tub getting high and rambling about the most nonsensical trash) - Dina, played by Diana Prince, is my favorite, and no shout outs because I loathed everyone else). The killers are your typical psychos here (they aren't implied to be 'escaped mental patients', though), and, as far as I can tell, their whole deal is forcing their victims to play torturous 'games' (for their own amusement, I suppose). They don't wear any disguises, and they seem to favor a hunting knife and handgun as their main weapons. The main killer has a very over the top personality, but the actor playing them just comes off as ultra hammy (I hated their performance). They don't really have a motivation or origin, and seem to just be doing it 'for the evulz'. The kills are mostly trash and without much blood or gore ('burial on the beach' is my highlight). The climax and ending are both garbage and super abrupt (by that point, I was just happy that it was over).
Final thoughts, the makeup seems fine, but the other special effects are just pathetic (the blood does look convincing, but the rest of it might as well not even exist). I hated the camerawork in this (there's some really awful composition with these terrible color filters that swap in and out (sometimes even midscene) - I especially despised that POS blue one). The editing is so sloppy with some harsh and bewildering cuts (it's pretty much a cobbled together Frankenstein job here - just laughably bad, honestly). I also hated (lol) the script in here (it's just really trashy and lazy writing, and gets mega rotten after the twist - my most hated part was Joey's cringy meta commentary rant about arthouse horror movies (right on, jackass, LOL). The rest of the technical aspects (sound, score, set work, etc.) are just the standard mediocre amateur quality here (you'll notice stuff like insects flying by the camera lens or jerky camera movements, but I will say that I didn't notice any crew reflections, though - maybe I was just too checked out to care, lol). I got two stray shout outs going out to the totally trashy and poorly edited opening titles sequence (throw it away!) and the obnoxious slow motion (which randomly drifts in and out). Like I said at the top of this, Diana Prince is indeed in this movie, but this movie however is complete garbage (it's gonna get a two for actually prominently featuring Darcy).
Rating: 2/10 (Terrible)
Best Character: Dina (Diana Prince)
Massacre Count: 11 (Overall: 457) - DirectorBill LeslieTerry LoftonStarsRocky PattersonRon QueenBeau LelandAfter a young girl is gang raped by a crew of construction workers, someone starts killing off members of the group with a nail gun.Day 14 - Sunday the 14th (SLASHER SUNDAY)
Mini-Review: A mid 80's backwoods rape and revenge video slasher from Fantastic Films and 88 Films here. Quick note: I reviewed this once before in Spooktober 2018. Well, I definitely had a better time with this in this rewatch. After a woman gets raped at a construction site, a mysterious masked killer appears and starts murdering her assailants with a nail gun. This story is some pure stupid 80's sleaze right here (I guess it's all you might expect from a title like 'Nail Gun Massacre'). It's supposed to be a revenge type deal, but the killer just goes off the rails and starts murdering any random person they can find (these murder sequences happen pretty much completely out of the blue, and feel almost vignette-like in their presentation). The Sheriff's Department is of course on the case, but the investigation is being head up by a pair of total morons (the dumbass doctor is easily the worst of the two - this guy couldn't even figure out that a nail gun was the murder weapon despite the fact that each victim was riddled with nails). It's such a dumb story that it's hard not to have fun with this farce (it's fairly timely, too, with the pacing only really dragging during the sex scenes).
The cast is mostly trashy and decidedly amateur in here (they give your average exploitation film performance with some of them stumbling over their lines, and one of them, the storekeeper, literally reading her lines from a script, which is blatantly visible on the counter - the Avenger was my favorite in my original review, and remains so in this rewatch, but shout outs to Thomas, Linda, and the 'Old Man in Town' (who was the real MVP of the movie, lol)). The Avenger (which is what they call themselves) is also the killer. They wear a somewhat giallo-like disguise (black motorcycle helmet, which has black tape over the visor because I guess they couldn't find a blackened visor, camo fatigues, and black gloves and boots). They, as the title suggests, favor a nail gun as their main weapon (it's a gas-powered one with a giant tank needed for it to operate). Their initial motivation and origin is to avenge the raped girl (Linda) by hunting down and murdering her attackers (but, as mentioned, this falls by the wayside and they just begin murdering everybody). They also travel around in a hearse (for some reason) and have an over the top distorted voice (which is never made clear why either). The kills are bloody and gory, but not very creative ('caught with his pants down' and 'grilled to perfection' are my highlights). The climax and ending are quite predictable, but the killer reveal is still pretty crappy (I still think it should've been someone else, lol).
Final thoughts, this is a sleaze factory (an 80's sleaze factory at that), so the makeup and special effects aren't always top notch (the blood looks convincing enough and some of the gore looks above average, but there's also some failings, like the guy who 'readjusts' his position on the grill (y'know, when it's supposed to be burning him) or some of the nails being flimsy in the corpses (when they should be stiff)). Another trait of this oozing sleaze is the nudity and sex scenes (they pretty much get straight to it with the rape scene opening, which is very sleazy, but not as graphic as I remember it being - there's also topless shots galore and gratuitous drawn out and cheesy, almost softcore-like, sex scenes (which last about two to three minutes per scene, and aren't even remotely enticing, lol)). The script is largely trash, but I did like some of the dialogue in here (the Avenger makes the cheesiest puns after every kill, and I found myself enjoying them more this time around ('well, you just pissed me off' made me burst with laughter) - I also loved all of the lines by the 'Old Man in Town' (his last line is perfect, lol)). The rest of the production aspects aren't anything to write home about (it looks and sounds low budget because it is - there's hardly much that you can reasonably expect from an 80's video slasher in this department). I got three stray shout outs going out to the Avenger and Mary Sue just flat out ignoring each other (what, lol?), those two bozos having a 'pretend' gunfight with those nail guns (actual morons), and the location manager named 'Ray Gunn' ('only puns allowed'). I enjoyed this a lot more in this rewatch - it's firmly in the 'so bad, it's good' category (and that's the score it's getting from me).
Rating: 7/10 (Good)
Best Character: The Avenger (Michelle Meyer & Thomas Freylac)
Massacre Count: 15 (Overall: 472) - DirectorDarren BerryStarsKaty BrandLee Latchford-EvansRobert PortalOld school friends go on a paintball trip, miles away from civilization. Things go horribly wrong when they discover a cold-blooded masked killer is among them. Now they must fight to survive their school reunion.Day 15 - Monday the 15th
Mini-Review: An early 2020's British backwoods slasher from Uncork'd here. This has a strange start, but it does eventually become exactly what you're likely expecting. After attending a class reunion, a group of people get picked off one-by-one while playing paintball. It's a story that begins heavily as a comedy horror (which I didn't really care for) before turning into a full-blown slasher (which I also didn't care for, lol). The story is rather bland, but it tries to put on a front like it's got more going on than it does (mostly in regards to the killer reveal, which I'll cover later). I didn't hate the story, but I just couldn't bring myself to care for the events being presented to me (this was largely due to the characters - who are nearly all completely detestable and unlikeable). The length is your standard runtime, but the pacing is pretty bad (the kill pacing in particular - it takes about forty minutes before the first 'proper' kill appears).
The cast is mostly just mediocre across the board in here (they're not 'bad', per se, but none of them give any noteworthy performance - Ben is probably my favorite, but shout outs to Lauren and Tommy). The killer wears a disguise which is cobbled together from the clothing of their victims (they pilfers most of them from their initial batch of kills - it's a custom paintball mask and that body armor). They use a couple of kill methods (including traps), but they never use a paintball gun to kill anyone (they do shoot a bunch of people, though). Their motivation and origin is evidently revenge-based (I suppose, it's not entirely clear), and they try to kill their victims based on their character traits (like drowning the lifeguard, for example). I really disliked the resolution to them and their interests (absolutely rotten). The kills are bloody, very gory at times, and do follow a theme ('impaled with extreme prejudice' is my highlight). The climax and ending both suck and are quite the letdown (the killer reveal, or lack there of, is worse than a crime - an obvious and lackluster setup for a sequel).
Final thoughts, the makeup and special effects do have a low budget look to them, but they do shine in a couple of instances (most of the gore seems to be practical effects, and does have an alright appearance to it, but there's also some really awful chroma key and CGI blood - this CGI blood always looks so crappy and cheap, and I have no idea why anybody ever insists on using it). I hated the writing in here for the most part (the British slang is sometimes pretty fun to hear, but Sara's stoned ramblings about the Fast & Furious series or those lengthy exposition dumps in the climax are some of their worst showings). The camerawork does give off a 'professional' look at times (the image is clear and usually well lit), but I disliked the grayish color grading (the setting is already dreary, and the coloring gave the picture a boring look). The rest of the technical aspects seem adequate, but didn't do much to standout to me (well, I guess the score is sometimes a winner). I got one stray shout out going out to Lauren matching her photograph in the woods (terrible, lol). This didn't really do much for me (it's not the worst, but I didn't find myself enjoying it that much). The start is too slow and the finish is too disappointing (judging by the ending, I guess they're intending to start a series with this film, but I wouldn't bother with this poor effort here).
Rating: 3/10 (Bad)
Best Character: Ben (Nathan Clough)
Massacre Count: 20 (Overall: 492) - DirectorJoe HendrickStarsBill Oberst Jr.Katy FoleyZach SilvermanJenny Bilson, a high school senior, is the perfect student, a wonderful daughter to a veteran police detective and an all American Dream. But the one mistake she is unaware of making is about to haunt her in a very violent way, as her past returns for revenge.Day 16 - Tuesday the 16th
Mini-Review: A mid 2010's indie slasher from ITN here. This felt a lot higher quality than I was expecting from a straight-to-VOD movie here. A maniac with an axe crashes the party of some teens who are ditching school for the day. Pretty straightforward deal with the only real angle being the killer's motivation (which isn't revealed until the end). The story intercuts between the teens' party and the killer's journey to their house (at first I thought this was going to be like Halloween (1978) with the killer just murdering his way to them, but the killer actually talks in this and takes the time to 'interact' with a couple of characters before his arrival). The segments with the killer's progression are good (and I enjoyed his personality), but the segments with the teens were fairly boilerplate (it's just the typical 'party time, sexy time' stuff - you've seen it all before). A shorter runtime with this (at just over an hour excluding the ending credits), and the pacing is mostly alright (again, it rotates between the segments pretty regularly).
The cast has some decent performances, but they're mostly mediocre (the teens are the weak links here, and the adults are competent to above average - Bill Oberst Jr. as Vick is my favorite, but shout outs to Detective Mann and Mrs. Donattucci). Vick Taddler is also the killer, and, also as mentioned, gives a rather animated performance (I wasn't expecting his personality to be so lively, tbh - he's got a couple of 'quirks' with his character, too). He doesn't really wear a disguise (his outfit is a boring plain suit and black gloves - I guess it's sort of giallo-like), and his main weapon is a rusty axe. His motivation and origin is only briefly hinted at over the course of the movie until the finale (when the full reveal happens - it's more or less the usual revenged-based deal here). The kills have a good amount of blood and some decent gore (plenty of severed body parts and such - 'feeding the fish' is my highlight). The climax and ending aren't particularly impressive or satisfying (it sort of tries to make everyone, including the final girl, get their just deserts, which is a bit bizarre).
Final thoughts, the makeup and special effects look really good for an indie VOD slasher here (and, from what I could tell, they're all practical as well - the looks great, but the severed body part props are way better than I expected (the chopped off fingers are the best)). Most of the camerawork is pretty plain and without much 'style' (the composition and lighting are decent, but uninspired - the color grading does seem bright, which does make the picture pop). The writing feels about average in here (it doesn't go out of its way to be clever or witty, but it doesn't really do anything to standout either). I don't have much to comment on with the remaining technicals (it's fairly par for the course for an indie horror flick - some aspects are better than usual, though, and I never noticed any of the film crew or equipment making 'cameo appearances'). I got three stray shout outs going out to Vick's apple obsession (which does indeed get elaborated on, lol), Mann's tendency to get in everybody's face (he's a very passionate man, LOL), and multiple victims vomiting while getting killed (wtf? sure, lol). This does have some well done bits, but it doesn't do much to rise too far above the usual VOD slasher flick (it mostly just falls in the middle of the road here: a rather average showing).
Rating: 5/10 (Average)
Best Character: Vick Taddler (Bill Oberst Jr.)
Massacre Count: 10 (Overall: 502) - DirectorRiley WoodStarsPatrick AthertonChris BaileyBriana BakerA group of nine friends decide to spend Labor Day in the desert town of Victorville. Meanwhile, for the first time in it's less than illustrious history, Victorville finds itself terrorized by an uncatchable serial killer. Unknowingly, the nine friends are about to embark on a haunting journey in a night full of heart pounding terror where dirty secrets within the group will be revealed and blood will be shed. Who will survive?Day 17 - Wednesday the 17th
Mini-Review: An early 2010's indie slasher from Not a Camel here. Here's another one that doesn't go out of its way to rise above its fellow VOD indie slashers. During their labor day holiday, a group of friends get ambushed and massacred by a masked killer. The story here relies heavily on flashbacks to reveal its finer details (or any details, really). These flashbacks feel mostly unnecessary, and are usually shown right before a character gets killed (like sometimes directly before they drop dead, and most of them are revealing information relevant to the character who's about to die - which, to me, comically defeats the purpose). The majority of the story is your usual 'party time, sexy time' (a common slasher trope, but this one gets particularly cliché with it - like playing truth or dare, or whatever). So, yeah, the story didn't thrill me, but it is well-timed and nicely paced (a rather short length, and it never slows down).
The cast is amateur and absolutely feels like it, too (there's only a couple of standouts with the rest of them being fairly mediocre - Stephanie is my favorite, but shout outs to Matt and Bailey). The killer wears a very 2000's-like disguise (the main item is a cheapo looking 'skull' ski mask), and uses a hunting knife (it looks just like Ghostface's) as their main weapon. Their origin and motivation are both revealed in the final act (through a flashback, of course - I hated that reveal and pretty much everything involved with them, frankly), and the way they carry themselves is sort of a mashup of Ghostface (they wipe the blood off their knife multiple times) and the Shape (they tilt their head a couple of times). The kills aren't very bloody and without any actual gore (they also remind me of the stabbing kills from the Scream series - 'leave her hanging' is my highlight). The climax and ending are a flashback frenzy and I disliked both of them (they go way overboard with it - it's already a poor way of conveying your story, so to go with a blowout in the finale just feels really lazy).
Final thoughts, the makeup and special effects are limited, but they seem serviceable when they do appear (the scenes are dark when the gore is on camera, so it's sometimes difficult to make out the details - such as the severed head, which looks decent, but that might just be because of the obfuscated vision). The cinematography is just sort of plain, but the lighting seems low (I guess it's on purpose, but it does work with the coloring here - that coloring also changes up during the flashbacks with it becoming brighter). The writing is quite clunky and didn't do much for me here (the tone can't seem to decide whether it wants to be completely serious or not, and is peppered with poorly timed, and weird, humor - the characters are also largely insufferable, and I disliked almost all of them). The sound and score both seem fine albeit not particularly interesting. I got one stray shout out going out to the blurring of multiple logos (including the beverage cans and Matt's Social Distortion t-shirt). I want to say that this is a bad movie (because my enjoyment of it pretty much completely disintegrated by the finale), but it did keep me entertained and engaged for the most part (I suppose that'll qualify it as 'mediocre' for review purposes).
Rating: 4/10 (Mediocre)
Best Character: Stephanie (Sonja O'Hara)
Massacre Count: 12 (Overall: 514) - DirectorNick JongeriusStarsPatrick BaladiBen BattCharlotte BeaumontSeven tourists with troubled pasts find themselves trapped at a satanic mill in rural Holland. As they're attacked for their sins one by one, the night becomes a fight for survival.Day 18 - Thursday the 18th
Note: Also known as "The Windmill Massacre".
Mini-Review: A mid 2010's Dutch supernatural backwoods slasher from XLrator here. Aside from the setting (which is sort of 'exotic' for a slasher, I guess), this is a pretty straightforward deal here. When their bus breaks down in the woods, some tourists finds themselves at the mercy of a disfigured maniac with a scythe. Indeed this story keeps it simple with its main thing being the supernatural angle (it blends in with the 'past coming back to haunt you' trope - peppered with some flashback/flashback adjacent scenes). It doesn't lean to heavily on this aspect until near the end (and even then it never really goes 'all-out'). Either way, the actual story isn't anything to write home about, but it mostly gets the job done (decent length and fast pacing helps, too).
The cast is all fairly good and give committed performances here (a couple of them do get sort of hammy at times, though - Jennifer is my favorite, but shout outs to Takashi, Abe and Noah Taylor as Nicholas). 'Miller Hendrik' is the killer. He's a miller (yes), and maintains his mill with blood sacrifices (the aforementioned tourists - he literally uses their blood to keep the mill operational). He doesn't wear a disguise, but his appearance is disfigured. He uses a scythe as his main weapon. There's not much to him beyond his initial motivation and origin (which he sticks to to the very end). The kills are extremely bloody with some nice gore ('the zombie stomp' is my highlight). The climax is sort of predictable, but the ending, which I found to be pretty rotten, isn't (it's another helping of the 'everyone gets their just deserts' finish - aka downer endings all around).
Final thoughts, the makeup and visual effects are mostly great in here (Hendrik's appearance is gruesomely realized and the gore, although, masked by dark shots, looks brutal, but sometimes over the top - the CGI is hit or miss, though, with the fire looking rough and the smoke looking alright). The camerawork is pretty stylish and vibrant in here (the cinematography compliments the environments and landscape shots, and the interior shots, especially during night scenes, are nicely lit). The writing is fine enough, but some elements did annoy me (like the killer sparing one character, that character mentioning it to the others as a viable option, and then that plot point never being brought up again - I also never enjoy flashbacks, which are a lazy method of storytelling). I got two stray shout outs going out to the score and sound work (which enhance the atmosphere) and that one cheesy jump scare (which is telegraphed from a mile away). This was better and more well made than most other indie (foreign or otherwise) slashers that I've seen, but some of the writing and the ending, especially, let me down (up until that point I would've rated this a seven, but, with that finale, I'll knock that rating down to a six).
Rating: 6/10 (Decent)
Best Character: Jennifer (Charlotte Beaumont)
Massacre Count: 10 (Overall: 524) - DirectorJohn Carl BuechlerStarsKaren BlackJohn Phillip LawRichard LynchA group of friends discover gold deep inside an old mine. But by taking the gold and think they've hit it big, they awaken a long dead miner who's Hell Bent on protecting his treasure.Day 19 - Friday the 19th
Note: Also known as "Miner's Massacre".
Mini-Review: An early 2000's supernatural backwoods slasher from Ammo Content and slasher veteran John Carl Buechler here. This is Buechler's second directed slasher (his first is Friday the 13th Part VII: The New Blood (1988)), but he was involved on the productions of many others (usually as the special effects person). This particular offering here isn't too far from what you'd probably expect. A group of friends venture to an old mine shaft to locate some lost gold, which, unbeknownst to them, is being guarded by its resurrected and bloodthirsty owner. We've got ourselves another case of 'those meddling kids' here (yes, it's exactly like that Scooby-Doo episode with the Miner 49er, but the gang gets killed instead). I can't say that this story really let me down because it pretty much served its purpose (it's a workmanlike deal; no outside contact, killer's origin in flashbacks, seemingly crazed locals to relay said origin - the whole nine yards). It's got the standard runtime (about an hour and thirty minutes), and a rather smooth pacing here.
The performances from the main cast are just 'fine', and the supporting cast are the ones who truly shine (Axl was probably my favorite, but shout outs to Sheriff Murphy, Karen Black as Aunt Nelly, and Richard Lynch as Old Man Prichard). Jeremiah Stone, the 'forty-niner', is the killer. He doesn't really wear a disguise (well, I guess his mining attire and altered appearance could be considered a disguise, maybe), and favors a pickaxe as his main weapon. As stated earlier, his origin is shown in a pretty lengthy flashback (which reveals that he evidently made a 'deal with the devil'), but I'm not entirely sure how he managed to get resurrected in the first place (I did skip over the opening credits sequence, so maybe it was explained there - or I'm just an idiot and missed it). His motivation is to protect his gold from thieves (the victims find his gold with a map and claim as their own). He is a cannibal (shown to be boiling a victim's head in a pot at one point), but that's about the only real info about him. The kills have a nice amount of blood and gore, and are somewhat creative ('shovel as a spear' is my highlight). The climax is explosive, but straightforward, and the ending itself leaves the door open for more (there isn't, though).
Final thoughts, the makeup and special effects do appear low budget, but they do a decent job of living up to Buechler's previous efforts (most of the gore, and Stone's appearance, looks good and seems practical, but the CGI looks cheesy and kind of crappy (it's mostly those 'spirits') - the CGI in general has a very '2000's era' look about it). The writing here seems to play this straight for the most part, but there are some (sarcastic) attempts to blend in humor (mostly toilet humor, which wasn't really hitting with me - I did like some of the visual gags, though, like Prichard's poster scheme with full-on photocopier in view). I can't say that many of the other technical aspects really impressed me here (it's largely competent; adequate composition, effective soundtrack, good stunt work, well lit, etc. - the direction manages these elements nicely and the execution achieves an entertaining result). I got one stray shout out going out to Stone attaching the pickaxe to his arm stump (it's not a loss, it's an improvement!). Buechler obviously had the experience, and delivered a pretty decent, albeit rather formulaic, low budget slasher here (it's got a fun, old school vibe about it, which I liked).
Rating: 6/10 (Decent)
Best Character: Axl (Steve Wastell)
Massacre Count: 9 (Overall: 533) - DirectorMichele Massimo TarantiniStarsMichael SopkiwSuzane CarvalhoMilton RodríguezA small plane carrying fossil hunters crashes in the Amazon jungle, and the survivors must battle their way through cannibals, wild animals, and slave traders.Day 20 - Saturday the 20th
Mini-Review: A mid 80's Italian action horror from Severin Films here. From the top, this isn't a cannibal movie (despite boasting the alternate title of 'Cannibal Ferox II') and is more of a standard 'jungle action' flick with some horror aspects (the native tribe in the movie are never identified as being cannibals, but they do have human skulls and other random bones around their village). After their plane crashes in the Amazon rainforest, a group of explorers are hunted down and massacred one-by-one by a native tribe there. That is how the setup goes (and how most of the movie goes as well), but it does change gears into something else in the third act (that change-up feels like a completely separate movie, too). I did enjoy the bulk of the story with the tribe, but the remainder, when they reach 'civilization', is pretty mediocre (the pacing up until that point is good, but it falls off after that - the rest of the movie feels like they didn't shoot enough content, and just decided to add that extra segment to pad the runtime).
The cast is largely overdubbed in English, but their actual performances seem fine (Kevin, played by Michael Sopkiw, who I also liked in 2019: After the Fall of New York (1983), is my favorite, but shout outs to John and Belinda). There's two main threats here; the native tribe and 'someone else' (who shall be unnamed, lol). The tribe worships a Dinosaur God (who seems to be a supernatural figure), and offer sacrifices (the explorers) to appease him (quick note: as the title suggests, the jungle where the tribe lives at was apparently inhabited by dinosaurs in 'prehistoric times'). The Dinosaur God does indeed appear: he wears a large dino skull on his head and possesses a large green dino claw on one of his hands (I'm not making this up - he's the coolest thing in the movie, lol). I really wish he was the main villain, but he isn't (the other 'person' is). The whole third act, which contains the climax and ending, feels like a different film here (one which isn't anywhere near as cool or entertaining as what came before it). It's kind of a disappointment, which I didn't care for (mostly because it just sort of abandons the story with the dinosaur tribe and becomes a generic action flick).
Final thoughts, there's kills in this, and they're sometimes bloody and also somewhat creative ('the fastest way to a guy's heart', which is easily the goriest and also probably the goriest part of the movie, is my highlight). The makeup and special effects to showcase the gore and assorted fixtures is pretty good (it's got that tasty Italian grindhouse look to it (the damage on that guy's leg from those piranha bites looks gnarly) - special mention to the costume design on the Dinosaur God's outfit). The nudity is very casual in here (as to be expected with a movie like this - lots of topless and ass shots), and the sex scenes have that cheesy softcore porno vibe about them (complete with accompanying soundtrack). Most of the sound work in here (score and foley) is decent, but some of the dubbing is rather trashy (like poorly synced and dull delivery). The camerawork is average, but it does do a good enough job of photographing the scenery (the colors of the jungle pop nicely, but the angles leave something to be desired). I got three stray shout outs going out to the 'erotic' photoshoot with those natives (sure, lol), these freakin' leeches (bloodsuckers), and the pig that bites Kevin's leg (lol). In summation, although the finale disappointed me, I still had a pretty good time with the events leading up to it (and I was actually kind of relieved that this wasn't a cannibal movie). If they had leaned more into the Dinosaur God angle, then this could've been great (like even having the tribe and god return for the climax would've been cool, but they just sweep it under the rug like it never happened).
Rating: 7/10 (Good)
Best Character: Kevin Hall (Michael Sopkiw)
Massacre Count: 31 (Overall: 564) - DirectorMichele SoaviStarsDavid BrandonRichard BarkeleyBarbara CupistiA group of stage actors lock themselves in the theater for a rehearsal of their upcoming musical production, unaware that an escaped psychopath has sneaked into the theater with them.Day 21 - Sunday the 21st (SLASHER SUNDAY)
Note: Also known as "Sound Stage Massacre".
Mini-Review: A late 80's Italian slasher from Blue Underground here. Here's some pretty typical slasher fare, but adorned with some Italian gialli flair. A group of stage performers get trapped in a theatre and slaughtered by an escaped mental patient. As you can see, the story is the standard 80's slasher setup with the secluded location and the escaped mental patient. The main angle with this one is the setting (which is the theatre - the majority of the action takes place there, so that also lends itself to keeping its budget low). This is an 80's slasher, so a common setup, like this one, is to be expected, but that setup does get the job done of initiating the story (this does seem to favor simplicity overall with it laying out all of its pieces, and not leaving much unturned). The third act is where things take a turn for the 'bizarre' (in typical gialli fashion), and that whole segment (like the final twenty or so minutes unfolds in a rather dreamlike way - I half expected something diabolical to happen as a last 'screw you' to the final girl, but it didn't). Either way, I did enjoy this story for what it was (it came and went in a timely manner, too).
The cast is above average to pretty great in here (this is an Italian production, but most of the actors aren't overdubbed, or, if they are, they're very well dubbed (lol) - Alicia is my favorite, but shout outs to Willy, Sybil, Peter, and a r a r e shout out to Lucifer (aka the real MVP)). Irving Wallace is the killer. He, like most of the rest of the characters, is an actor (well, a disgraced former one), and manages to escape the asylum by hiding in Betty's car (it's not really shown how he got in there, though). His origin and motivation are fairly basic (he apparently just went on an insane killing spree), and seems to just want to continue adding to his body count. His disguise is the same outfit worn by the fictional 'Night Owl' murderer from the play (so, I guess he technically 'becomes' the Night Owl), and he doesn't seem to favor one weapon over the other (he mainly uses gardening and power tools). He never speaks, but he does show some shades of personality (especially in the third act when he goes full weirdo gialli villain - seriously, I loved that sequence, but it's super strange). The kills are extremely bloody and gory, but not too imaginative ('cut my life into pieces', 'half the woman she used to be', and 'you know the drill!' are my highlights). The climax, aside from the nightmarish stuff, plays out like you probably think it will, and the ending seems to suggest that there's more to come (there isn't, though).
Final thoughts, the makeup and special effects have that grimy grindhouse look to them that you'll only really find in these 80's movies (that of course works out perfectly for something like this - these aren't the finest visuals I've seen, especially from an Italian production, but they're still pretty great (you'll get your gore value's worth and then some)). I enjoyed the score (done by a trio of composers), which has a couple of different vibes in here (sometimes it's synths, or jazzy, or even orchestral - it fits each mood and atmosphere effortlessly). The camerawork (supplied by Renato Tafuri) is indeed rather stylish in here as well (as many of these Italian horrors tend to have - it veers into gialli territory in the third act with a couple of extreme closeups and peculiar angles). I have no complaints about the remainder of the technical aspects as they're all fairly high quality (just some really slick and confident filmmaking here). I got four stray shout outs going out to the classic cat jump scare (supplied by Lucifer), the set design and decoration (fantastic), Peter doing coke throughout the movie (lol), and Lucifer beasting and feasting at Irving's party (this freakin' cat, LOL). I don't have much to criticize here - this is pretty much the best Italian slasher I've seen (dethroning my previous favorite The New York Ripper (1982)). It's simple, stylish, and straight to the point (and never too mean-spirited either - a top notch late addition to the 80's slasher canon).
Rating: 10/10 (Masterwork)
Best Character: Alicia (Barbara Cupisti)
Massacre Count: 10 (Overall: 574) - DirectorPhilip GunnDavid Carlos ValdezStarsJared HerholtzRoss KellyKerri DaubeFifteen years ago, Edwin went to clown camp to fulfill his lifelong dream of bringing laughter to the world - but nobody laughed. Humiliated on graduation night, Edwin viciously murdered the entire camp before vanishing into legend.Day 22 - Monday the 22nd
Mini-Review: A late 2000's / early 2010's meta backwoods comedy slasher from Troma here. This is a comedy, but it's a really dark comedy (with a strange melancholy vibe surrounding it). After the clown camp where a massacre happened at re-opens, the killer decides to make his way back to the site to resume his killing spree. The story here has a setup which is familiar to Friday the 13th (1980) (there's actually quite a few 'homages' and references to that movie), but it does eventually go its own way and tries to blend its lightheartedness with some other dark content (and doesn't really work for me, honestly - I guess it wants to be a 'comedy horror', but it ends up feeling more like a 'horror comedy'). The actual story with the clowns at the camp is very bizarre (almost surreal), and is also prefaced with a bit with the killer watching some weird fake clown television shows and commercials (the setting itself is rather confusing because it seems to suggest that 'clowns' are a regular occurrence). The length is fine, and so is the pacing (it gets kind of shaky in the third act, though).
The cast is mostly above average and actually pretty good for a Troma Team feature here (they seem to understand the tone (even if the movie itself seems confused at times), and they all give uniquely 'clownish' (and also sometimes creepy) performances - Puff is my favorite, but shout outs to Lenny and Edwin). Edwin the Clown is also the killer. His disguise is his clown costume and he seems to favor a hatchet as his main weapon. He gets your standard origin and motivation being revealed in a flashback (a rather grim and gratuitous one at that - with a splash of inappropriate comedy, too). His personality is tied to his origin and motivation in that he wants to be a 'funny' clown (or maybe a 'successful' clown is more accurate - he fails his 'final test' in clown camp, which drove him insane in the first place). Beyond that, there isn't much to him (he seems to enjoy ambushing his victims and offing them in 'sneaky' ways). The kills are fairly creative with lots of blood and gore ('pie in your face' and 'the super punch' are my highlights). The climax features a very meta angle (which failed to impress or satisfy me), and the ending seems to be a setup for more (which there isn't).
Final thoughts, well, this makeup and visual effects seem higher quality than something like this would have (the gore is where it really shines, but the other additional effects, like with Puff's magic or those 'objects' floating around Lenny's head, also look decent enough - some of the props, like severed body parts, are where it shows its limitations, though). As mentioned, the humor is dark (sometimes too dark - I did like the exchange between Puff and Phil after they find that hanging guy) and plenty of it is also sex comedy (which was mostly a miss with me, like the creeptastic flasher clown, 'Squirts', who is largely there for, uh, 'bodily fluid' gags). There's also lots of nudity in here (mostly topless shots, which are occasionally played for laughs). The score (supplied by Kaleb Wentzel-Fisher) also has some clear references to other horror movies, but it largely serves its purpose (maybe a little too well, lol). I disliked some of the writing and plot decisions here (for example, I did like the clown TV stuff, but I hated that they, uh, 'doubled down' on it later on - they should've doubled down on it, but in a different way). The way it's handled and that execution didn't sit well with me (so, I guess I also disliked the direction, lol). I got two stray shout outs going out to Buzter the ICP ripoff who sometimes raps (they even got him a fake Faygo called 'Frugo') and Banana the Kung Fu Monkey (it's clearly a guy in an ape suit, but they treat him like an actual monkey). If this handled its tone better and had a less cop out ending, then this probably could've been in the upper echelon of Troma pictures (the other components are there, but it ultimately keeps itself from being that good).
Rating: 6/10 (Decent)
Best Character: Puff (Chris Payne)
Massacre Count: 8 (Overall: 582) - DirectorAndy PalmerStarsJere BurnsScottie ThompsonMatt AngelSix of the world's scariest psychopaths escape from a local Asylum and proceed to unleash terror on the unsuspecting crowd of a Halloween Funhouse, whose themed mazes are inspired by their various reigns of terror.Day 23 - Tuesday the 23rd
Mini-Review: A mid 2010's indie comedy slasher from Shout! Factory here. This is just a very basic offering with an enormous body count (like probably one of the highest of all slashers). When some murderous maniacs escape from a secret asylum, they make their way to a local scream park to massacre the crowd there. After that setup, the story pretty much turns into a murder gallery for all of the maniacs to rack up a (quite frankly) absurd kill count (it's nearly one hundred that I counted, and I might've missed some). There are some flashbacks that give additional details about some of the characters and their relationships (including with a couple of the killers). If I'm being honest here, as soon as they (the main cast) get to the park the story pretty much goes into autopilot (that's not to say that the content which came before that was even particularly enthralling, but there was at least some attempt at putting something together). Underwhelming story aside, it moves at an extremely brisk pace here (you're in and out in no time).
The cast seems more than qualified (like over caliber) than something like this requires (I spotted only a couple of weak links in here, but most of them give appropriate performances - Jere Burns as Mental Manny is my favorite, but shout outs to Dollface, Christina, Robert Englund as Warden Kane, and Clint Howard as Walter). The maniacs (Manny, Walter, Dr. Suave, Animal, Rocco, and Dollface) are the killers. They're led by 'Mental' Manny Dyer whose daughter, Dollface, orchestrates the asylum escape (she poses as a journalist to get in there). They all have their own 'thing' (or gimmick, I guess), which is touched on in flashback sequences (Manny is a cult leader, Walter is a taxidermist, Suave is a dentist, Animal is a chef, and Rocco is a wrestler - their disguises and weapons reflect their origins). Despite the flashbacks giving the details of their origins, these sequences don't really reveal any reason behind their motivations (which basically just boils down to 'they're bloodthirsty maniacs'). The kills have a large amount of blood with some imaginative gore ('nice head, I think I'll take it!' is my highlight). The climax isn't particularly satisfying (and just sort of glosses over some aspects), and the ending seems to imply that there's more to come (we'll see, I guess).
Final thoughts, the makeup and special effects are definitely the main highlight of this movie, and they also definitely deliver here (this is some grotesquely delicious gore here, folks - top notch effort for an indie slasher, but there does seem to be some CGI or chroma key that looks slightly off). The humor in here was mostly a miss with me (the lion's share of it is in the form of a comic relief character (the goofball deputy, who is apparently played by the movie's writer), and most of this character's antics were just annoying to me). I also didn't care for much of the writing in here either (character development is limited, and the dialogue itself is rather basic - I'm starting to notice a pattern here). There are a couple of sex scenes and some nudity in here (it's largely played for comedy, though, and isn't particularly 'titillating' - well, for me, anyway). The remainder of the technical aspects are fairly competent, but not too remarkable (the score works out well enough, the camerawork never gets too 'stylish', and the sets are nicely designed). I got one stray shout out going out to Dollface's deliberately awful and fake looking wig near the beginning (it's absolutely disgusting). The gore is great, the performances are good, and the rest is adequate, but that isn't really enough for me to label this as 'good' (the areas where it shines don't necessarily offset the areas where it lacks - it is still decent for what it is, though).
Rating: 6/10 (Decent)
Best Character: Manny Dyer (Jere Burns)
Massacre Count: 90 (Overall: 672) - DirectorDaniel DahlstromDavid GereStarsMichael MadsenChelsea ValeVinny MarsegliaA group of college students spend a night at an old, eerie manor, only to realize that a terrifying stalker is watching their every move as he begins plans to repossess an ancient Native American artifact located inside.Day 24 - Wednesday the 24th
Mini-Review: An early 2020's indie slasher from VMI here. Well, you'd think this would be a vehicle for its featured player, Michael Madsen, but you'd be wrong for the most part (he isn't even prominently featured, and his role is almost entirely voiceover). While hosting a house party, an awkward guy and his friends get ambushed and picked off by a masked killer. There isn't really an 'angle' in this, but there is a hint at something 'supernatural' with some evidently 'mystical' artifacts being present (you'd think, especially from the poster and title, that this would be some kind of Native American-themed slasher here, but it really isn't - there's some mentions to that house being built upon an Indian burial ground, but none of that has a very meaningful payoff). The runtime goes slightly longer for a slasher, and the pacing is rather rotten (especially the kill pacing - the story just takes a random break occasionally to showcase the lead actor's 'magic skills'). Either way, this story didn't do much for me, and it just sort of meanders around with superfluous BS until it's finally time to start bumping people off.
The performances, aside from like one or two exceptions, are totally amateur hour and pretty awful in some cases (wooden and hammy delivery are the main culprits with the lead actor, who I recognized from some YouTuber's livestream of all things, is easily the worst - Michael Madsen is clearly just there for a paycheck, but he is still the best in the movie, so he'll earn my favorite spot with a light shout out to Becky). Damon is the killer (who is played by Madsen, but only for two scenes near the end - otherwise, he's played by some no-name actor with Madsen only providing an egregious voiceover). I guess he's supposed to be a Native American (lol), and his early motivation seems to be 'removing' those people who 'stole' his land (or ancestors' land, or something). His origin is sort of revealed in the opening narration (which is pretty heavy-handed, and also shows him 'gearing up' for his attack). His disguise is a mask which is made up to resemble a slain Indian chief (there's a photograph of the chief visible in the house). His true intentions are revealed later on, but it's never revealed if he's a fraud or not (in fact, there's hardly any insight on his character beyond what he says). The kills are mostly basic and mostly trash ('the back stabber' is my highlight - I only liked this one because I hated that character). The climax is extended trash (it's unsatisfying and drags on for what seems like forever), and the ending is just the cinematographer stroking himself off (you'll know it when it happens).
Final thoughts, speaking of the cinematography, the camerawork, despite me trashing the job in the finale, is mostly serviceable in here (the lighting is too dim in some of the scenes, though, with those scenes being difficult to make out as a result (again, you'll know it when it happens) - the photography is decently composed, but, like I mentioned, gets particularly self-indulgent near the end with these gratuitously framed 'stylish' shots (peep that final shot, lol)). The sound work is largely competent, but sometimes it goes bad with the mics getting muffled or having wind distortion (there's one scene with Damon making his way outside where it's especially bad). I hated most of the writing in here (it's got your usual bad writing suspects like 'on-the-nose' (hate that term, but it's the best description) dialogue and poorly written characters - they're pretty much all braindead and annoying, even by indie VOD slasher standards). I got two stray shout outs going out to the random specks that appear on the camera lens (throughout multiple scenes, no less) and Eddie seeing those bizarre ghosts (I suppose that's what they were - he's the only one who sees them, and they're never mentioned again after that brief encounter). Not only does this overstay its welcome, it also somehow takes too long to get to the point, and, by the time it does, you've lost all interest (there's nothing here that's compelling enough to keep you around, frankly, and this mostly just ends up as a wasted effort). For the second year, I have to wonder why Madsen finds himself in trashy films like this (is it really that easy to hire him these days? I might have to look into that, lol).
Rating: 3/10 (Bad)
Best Character: Damon (Michael Madsen)
Massacre Count: 11 (Overall: 683) - DirectorJordan DowneyStarsDaniel UsajJoe HartzlerPreston AltreeFowl-mouthed villain Turkie carves through the likes of a rapping grandma, a mindless puppet, a wig-wearing inventor, a bisexual space worm, and their equally ridiculous friends on his quest to recover the last copy of "ThanksKilling 2".Day 25 - Thursday the 25th
Holiday Special: Thanksgiving
Mini-Review: An early 2010's comedy horror / meta slasher from Gravitas, which is a sequel to ThanksKilling (2008). Well, this is pretty much nothing like the previous movie here (or even the 'fake' movie that came out before this). Turkie embarks on a journey to locate the final copy of ThanksKilling 2, which happens to be in the possession of a clueless puppet, who is attempting to find her mind at an informercial host's Thanksgiving celebration. I guess the main angle to this one is that this whole movie is a sequel to a nonexistent movie (ThanksKilling 2, which is apparently 'the worst movie ever'). I suppose this takes place in the same 'universe' as its predecessor, but it's hard to say for certain (for example, the first movie feels like a very average, sort of mundane, setting, but this has a more whimsical tone - the presence of puppets and other decidedly bizarre, uh, 'individuals' also seems to support this). Whatever the case, I didn't like this story, but I will give it some credit for at least trying to think outside of the box here (the length and pacing also make this a chore to get through).
The performances are better than the first movie, but still mostly trash (the actors in the first movie were barely actors, but these actors at least seem like they had a clue - Jordan Downey, the director, reprising his role as 'Turkie' is my favorite again, but shout outs to Lomi and Uncle Donny). Turkie returns as the killer in here. He's more or less the same as before (still spouts out one-liners after he kills somebody, and is still incredibly mean-spirited). His main goal is to find and destroy the last remaining copy of 'ThanksKilling 2' (which is evidently a space-themed sequel to the first movie, but, as you can probably surmise, there is no 'ThanksKilling 2'). He wants to destroy that movie because he's ashamed of it, and sets out on his adventure alongside his son (he gets a family, which is shown in a weird almost sitcom styled opening). Just like the first movie, he's pretty much the main highlight and reason to watch the movie (they seem to realize this as well because he gets more screentime in this than the first movie). The kills are sometimes creative and sometimes pretty gory (they didn't really impress me much - 'to shreds, you say?' is my highlight). The climax and ending both let me down (not much else to say here - I disliked that, lol).
Final thoughts, the production values feel better than the previous movie, but still not particularly 'good' (such as the visual effects, which showcase the gore fairly well, and the props, like Turkie's puppet or Lomi, that seem more detailed and higher quality - on the other hand, the CGI and animation both look rather mediocre and also sort of basic). The camerawork looks more professional than the first movie, and has a 'slick' look to it (a huge step up from the last effort, which looked like it was shot on video - the scenes are well lit, but the photography isn't too notable). So, I pretty much hated almost all of the writing in here (it's just really rotten and somehow even stupider than the previous entry - Turkie's still got some golden lines, though). Strangely enough, there's literally only one scene with nudity in the entire movie (and it's the opening scene with Wanda Lust in which the very first scene in the movie is her exposed bust - it's beyond stupid, lol). There's also some equally odd non sequitur fake commercials sprinkled in throughout the movie (they don't really have much of a point, and are usually full animation - I sort of liked the Meowmir one, but I hated the string cheese one). I got two stray shout outs going out to the fake Xbox 360 ThanksKilling 2 cover art (makes no sense) and Turkie's battle inside of that retro video game (actually sort of neat). I can appreciate the ambitions in this, but this is a really stale and trashy effort here (I wish I could say that this let me down, but I pretty much knew what to expect after seeing the first movie). It's gonna get a four for being a slight cut above the usual indie VOD trash.
Rating: 4/10 (Mediocre)
Best Character: Turkie (Jordan Downey)
Massacre Count: 7 (Overall: 690) - DirectorDavid Ryan KeithStarsDanielle HarrisDamien PucklerGary KasperThe hunters become the hunted after a stranger obsessed with the Redwood Farm murders convinces bereaved family members to venture into the wilderness in hope of proving the existence of the notorious burlap masked maniac.Day 26 - Friday the 26th
Mini-Review: An early 2020's backwoods slasher from Uncork'd, which is a sequel to The Redwood Massacre (2014). This is really just a worse version of the first movie here. A degenerate accompanies a gung-ho crew into the woods in search of a legendary killer. The story is a proper excuse (and also kind of an idiot) plot here, and is really just padding out its (overextended) runtime until it's time to start killing (it tries to setup some sort of personal connection with the family, but that is offset by the degenerate's trashy and poorly executed antics - most of that guy's scenes are fairly cringy and tryhard (like the cut to him having sex with that corpse)). It's safe to say that I hated this story with its length and brutal pacing only making it worse (it's a lot of build up for very little payoff - especially with regards to the finale, which I'll cover in a minute).
The cast is mostly mediocre with some of them being 'competent' at best (Danielle Harris, the featured player, is probably the best, but light shout out to Tom). The killer from the first movie (who is evidently unnamed - he's identified as the 'Burlap Killer' in the credits) returns for his second outing here. He wears a disguise which is similar to the first movie (but not exactly the same), and prefers power tools as his main weapons. He's the typical slasher villain here (nonchalant attitude, tilting his head, and shrugging frequently - the whole nine yards). He's also got a lackey this time, but that guy is pretty much entirely pointless (he's portrayed as a 'fanboy'). There's some insight into the killer's origin, but it's only briefly touched on. The kills are bloody with some nice gore, but, like the first movie, not very inventive ('nice head, I think I'll take it... again!' is my highlight). The climax and ending are both disappointing and definitely don't make up for the sluggish narrative.
Final thoughts, the makeup and special effects are pretty decent, and about on par with the previous movie (mostly in the gore department, which is probably the main attraction of the movie - the CGI, on the other hand, looks rough and rather janky (like all of the gunshots, for example)). The camerawork feels like a step down from the previous movie in here (it is nicely lit, particularly the dark scenes, but the composition looks mediocre - there's also plenty of overhead drone footage showing off the landscapes (it actually feels pretty gratuitous after a certain point)). I kind of hated the writing in here overall (nearly all of the characterizations are obnoxious and annoying (I don't think I 'liked' a single character in the movie, honestly), and the dialogue is all very basic and sometimes really rotten (I hated almost everything that came out of Gus' mouth, lol)). I got one stray shout out going out to the victims from the first movie making a photo cameo (on that conspiracy board). This absolutely feels in line with the typical VOD trash that Uncork'd puts out, and is a considerable step down from the previous movie (Danielle Harris and the gore effects are pretty much the only good things about this - the rest of it is boring, unwatchable trash).
Rating: 2/10 (Terrible)
Best Character: Laura (Danielle Harris)
Massacre Count: 12 (Overall: 702) - DirectorFrederick R. FriedelStarsLeslie LeeJack CanonRay GreenThree criminals on a murder spree arrives at a farmhouse, where a girl is living with her paralyzed grandfather.Day 27 - Saturday the 27th
Note: Also known as "California Axe Massacre".
Mini-Review: A mid 70's backwoods proto-slasher from BIP and Severin Films here. A real short and straightforward effort here. After they commit a crime spree, a trio of criminals decide to hideout at the farmhouse of a girl and her paralyzed grandfather. That's exactly right, I think you can probably guess how this one plays out (and you're probably not wrong either). I don't have much to say about this story (it didn't really impress me or anything like that), but I actually enjoyed my time with it (those two plots with the girl and the criminals are independent until they eventually connect at the end of the first act). The length and pacing are both super tight, which makes this a rather fast watch here (the opening and ending credits are extended, though, to, obviously, pad out the runtime - which comes to just a little over an hour).
The cast feels both amateur and also pretty good in here (or maybe 'inexperienced but also committed' is a better description - Lisa is my favorite, but shout outs to Steele, Lomax and the Grandfather). Steele isn't the killer, but he is the main villain here. He's the leader of the criminals (which also include Lomax and Billy), and is a real scummy and slimy individual (I'm sure you know the type, lol). He commits a murder early on and vandalizes a store, which is why he and his crew are on the run (and are evidently being actively hunted by some local cops). Lisa is the actual killer here. She doesn't wear a disguise, but she does use a hatchet as her main weapon (not exactly an 'axe', but close enough - she also uses a straight razor). Her main goal is to protect herself and her grandfather from the invading criminals (by hacking them to bits, obviously). The kills are very bloody, but without much gore or creativity ('go for the jugular' is my highlight). The climax and ending both play out in a fairly expected manner, but are mostly satisfying.
Final thoughts, the makeup and special effects are decent enough in here (the blood looks like the usual '70's bright', but it does pop against the monotone-colored setting). Speaking of the setting, it is rather mundane, but it is nicely photographed and decorated (it captures an old-styled rural vibe wonderfully - it's also apparently North Carolina, and not California, like one of the alternate titles suggests). I didn't really care for the sound mixing in here (which has the dialogue as too low, and everything else is loud in comparison). I did enjoy the score (supplied by Shaw and Willhelm), which also enhances the setting and atmosphere (it might actually be one of the highlights of the movie, tbh). I didn't hate the writing in here, but it was a little too lean (there's minimal dialogue in the first act, for example). I got one stray shout out going out to Steele and Lomax 'skeet shooting' the fruit in that store (just some good clean fun, obviously). It's a rather short, but still pretty sweet offering here (it's relatively well made, and I had a good time with it).
Rating: 7/10 (Good)
Best Character: Lisa (Leslie Lee)
Massacre Count: 4 (Overall: 706) - DirectorRick SloaneStarsMary WoronovJenny CunninghamJonathan BlakelyAn old movie house plagued with a history of unexplained tragedies is reopened with bloody history repeating itselfDay 28 - Sunday the 28th (SLASHER SUNDAY)
Note: Also known as "Movie House Massacre".
Mini-Review: A mid 80's indie supernatural comedy slasher from Vinegar Syndrome and Rick Sloane (who you may know as the director of Hobgoblins (1988)) here. This is kind of a, uh, 'bewildering' one right here. A group of theater workers are sent to repair and re-open an old theatre on their boss' behalf, but, unbeknownst to them, the theatre is evidently home to malevolent ghosts. Anyway, this story just sort of glosses over some (what you'd probably consider) key details (like almost everything involving the apparently 'haunted' theatre), and seems to prefer playing up these bizarro scenarios instead (scenarios which come off as non sequiturs, frankly). Although, I suppose the actual 'storyline' (with the workers at the theatre) is a fairly coherent deal (they do get coerced into doing the job for a $1,000 bonus - split three ways, of course). It's also got a rather short runtime with a decent(ish) pacing (it clocks in at just under an hour and twenty minutes).
The cast is mostly about average with some rotten performances mixed in here (Selena and Darcy, who I honestly can't tell if they're being sincere or not, are easily the worst - Mary Woronov, the featured player, as Miss Blackwell is my favorite, but shout outs to Jennifer and Murdock). The killer is, supposedly, the original owner of the theatre (he looks older and evidently stayed in the theatre after the opening setup). He doesn't wear a disguise (and they literally show his face in full view from his first appearance), and favors a long knife as his main weapon (I guess it's the same knife that he is shown with in the opening). You know, I'm gonna be honest here, I'm not even positive that the guy from the opening is the same guy from the 'current day' (he looks 'vaguely' similar to that guy, but not even, to me anyway, to be an 'older' version of him). There's also apparently ghosts (or maybe it's his supernatural powers?), which commit murders with psychic abilities (won't dwell on this too much because they don't either, lol). The kills are sometimes bloody and imaginative (see: ridiculous), but not too gory ('off with his head!' is my highlight). The climax and ending are both confounding and rather abrupt (the movie just sort of 'stops', lol).
Final thoughts, the makeup and special effects aren't really anything to write home about (they get the job done albeit sloppily - some of the props are look unconvincing and lazily done). The writing in here is really offbeat with some cheerfully trashy dialogue (like most of Selena's lines or anything said by those cheerleaders, lol). Speaking of Selena, the sound editing on her character is really bad (it's not very good across the board, but, with her, it almost seems like it's dubbed in). The soundtrack is largely upbeat in here (perhaps sometimes too upbeat, lol - I did enjoy the ending theme, though). I didn't hate the camerawork (there's some interesting shots and also some bizarre composition), but it's mostly just average (you might say that it does work in this movie's favor, though - considering that it may add to this movie's strangeness). I got five stray shout outs going out to Selena's shoulder devil (who appears in lingerie for some reason, lol), Selena joining those cheerleaders (that outfit, though? lol), all of the fake films at the theaters ('Clown Whores of Hollywood' is the highlight), Jennifer's weirdo popcorn 'death dream' (which also appears on the poster), and Selena's gold pants (get a good gander). This apparently gets destroyed critically, but I had a pretty fun time with it (it's just the right amount of stupid and confusing that touches me). I pretty much got what I wanted out of it (some decently entertaining 80's trash), but if it didn't fumble the ending, then it could've been good.
Rating: 6/10 (Decent)
Best Character: Miss Blackwell (Mary Woronov)
Massacre Count: 30 (Overall: 736) - DirectorHenrique CoutoStarsErin R. RyanMarylee OsborneJoni DurianYoung women start a babysitting business until one of their friends dies. Years later, they go their separate ways, but someone starts killing them one at a time on Halloween.Day 29 - Monday the 29th
Mini-Review: An early 2010's indie holiday slasher from New Dynamic here. This one's a real trashy flashback grindhouse-styled exploitation slasher right here. A masked maniac targets a party being held by a group of babysitters. That's the gist of it, but that actual setup only really covers the final act (before that the babysitters (the main trio, anyway) and the killer are acting independently from each other). Even though they are apart of the same story, the events, as they're unfolding, wind up feeling disjointed (they're only really held together by the photos that the killer periodically sends to Angela). Flimsy connections aside, this story didn't do much for me (entertainment-wise), and just came off feeling pretty trashy (and not the good kind of trash, either). Runtime and pacing-wise, this was just alright (it's got a shorter length, and there's little filler or other unnecessary scenes - most of the scenes do their job of advancing the plot forward).
The cast is largely amateur hour in here, but not entirely off-putting (I suppose you could say that these performances get the job done, but the job is a rather sloppy one - I didn't really 'like' any of these actors, but I guess Bianca is probably the best of them). The killer has a bland and cheap-looking disguise (it's like a white ski mask), and doesn't have a main weapon, either. Their origin and motivation is revenge-based (I think? it might also be obsession-based, but I'm not entirely certain) and their personality is the typical deranged psycho (they're pretty unremarkable overall - especially after their reveal). They do seem to enjoy torturing their victims, and do so in this strange pitch black room (a strange, but also appropriate, setting). The kills are quite bloody and also pretty mean-spirited ('the boiling point' is my highlight). The climax and ending are both pretty abrupt, and, whilst they are explosive, not especially satisfying (the killer reveal is lackluster because you can see it coming from miles away, and the final confrontation is a little too melodramatic).
Final thoughts, this being some exploitation throwback means that there's got to be loads of nudity, right? (abso-lutely, and there's tons of it - once it starts it never lets up, either, with it kicking off right in the opening scenes). Personally, I didn't really find much of it to be, uh, particularly 'enticing' (well, I guess I'm just too hard to please - whatever, lol). The makeup and special effects, like plenty of this film's other aspects, simply 'get the job done' (it's nothing spectacular, but some of the injuries, like that one girl's flesh burns, do look adequate - it's largely not anything you'd likely expect to see from an indie horror, though). The production value and camerawork carry the usual low budget, indie vibe here (it is decently lit, but the actual cinematography, sans a couple of scenes like the 'murder room' sequences, is rather boring - I guess it does do a good job of capturing the 'mundane' vibe in the early scenes). I got four stray shout outs going out to the gratuitous shower 'and' bathing scenes (got to have them both), Angela hanging out with her mother (a fun, lighthearted moment), that one guy's Quailman costume (did I mention that it's supposed to be Halloween, lol?), and the unbelievable Sorority House Massacre II shout out (I refuse to believe that that girl knows about that flick, which is obscure even to slasher standards). I can't say that this really impressed me too much here (it's easy to see what they were going for, but it doesn't go over enough for me).
Rating: 4/10 (Mediocre)
Best Character: Bianca (Marylee Osborne)
Massacre Count: 20 (Overall: 756) - DirectorBoaz DavidsonStarsBarbi BentonCharles LuciaJon Van NessWhile receiving a routine check-up, a woman finds herself stranded on the hospital's eighth floor, while someone dressed as a doctor is intent on her never leaving, even if it means killing any staff member who comes into contact with her.Day 30 - Tuesday the 30th
Note: Also known as "Hospital Massacre".
Mini-Review: An early 80's holiday slasher from the Cannon Group, Shout! Factory and 88 Films here. I reviewed this once before in Slasher Sunday 2019, so, for this re-review, I decided to watch it with a commentary track enabled. I looked at this favorably after my initial viewing of it, and enjoyed it even more this time around. Years after witnessing her friend murdered, a woman is ambushed and tormented by a masked killer after hours at a scarcely populated hospital. And, yeah, it mostly plays out just like that, but there's also a fair amount of almost surreal scenes that occur in here (the bulk of them do end up tying back into the plot eventually, but they seem strange in the moment - such as the deal with that entire floor being fumigated, which is where the killer decides to 'hideout' at). The hospital's staff seems to be working with a skeleton crew as well for 'some reason' (it does appear to be happening after hours, though). There isn't much to take away from this story, but I did have a good time with it, all things considered (the length and pacing being rather timely also helped out).
The cast ranges from average to somewhat good in here (nobody seems to be trying to make this out to be an 'over the top' feature here, and most of them are taking their roles seriously - Barbi Benton and Elizabeth Hoy both portray the final girl, with Hoy playing her in the opening, and are my favorites, but shout outs to Dr. Saxon, Harry, and Billy Jacoby's cameo). The killer wears medical attire, including a surgical mask, as his disguise, and doesn't seem to have a main weapon (he sometimes favors a scalpel, though). His origin and motivation is really blatantly obvious, but they try to cover it up (and do a rather poor job of it, too). It's not completely clear as to why he's decided to start offing the hospital staff (and never truly explained as far as I remember), but it is revealed why he specifically targets Susan (if you take a guess, then you're probably right). The kills are occasionally very bloody and actually pretty creative ('the curtain call' and 'the acid drop', which was my favorite in my original review, are my highlights). The climax and ending are both fairly predictable, but still rather enjoyable (I guess the same can be said for the majority of the movie).
Final thoughts, the makeup and special effects aren't the finest, but they do have some shining moments here and there (like the 'acid drop' kill, which was a lot more nastier (the bubbling on his face in particular) and unsettling then I remember it being - the axe murder is also nicely done). I enjoyed the dramatic score in here (supplied by Arlon Ober - it's got a, uh, 'peculiar'/familiar sound to it). The camerawork (photographed by Nicholas Josef von Sternberg) is also rather peculiar (almost dreamlike, especially in the fumigated floor with all of the smoke around) and pretty slick (in it's own way, of course). The writing does get nonsensical at times, but it mostly accomplishes its mission by the end of it (its flaws come down to a few 'questionable' creative decisions here). There's not a 'ton' of nudity in here, but there is a good deal of it (it's mostly from Susan, and also under the veil of 'medical' - there is a silhouette stripping bit, though). I got three stray shout outs going out to Young Susan cutting that cake (funny fake out), that guy's copious amount of ketchup (kind of gross, tbh), and Dr. Saxon's gratuitous and overextended 'examination' of Susan (including the needle poke closeup, lol).
About the commentary, it was from the 88 Films 2015 release, which was also apart of their 'Slasher Classics Collection' series, and featured Justin Kerswell and Calum Waddell. They spend just as much time discussing the film as they do discussing adjacent topics as well (like related slashers or other Cannon Group films - or even the history of the Cannon Group). Since neither of these guys worked on the film, the details about the film's production are only ever lightly touched on (they're not completely absent, but cast details are the main subject, production-wise). They digress at various moments (usually when there'd probably be dead air), but these diversions do help pad out the commentary (so, there's that, I guess, lol). It's kind of a podcast-like commentary here (this is my first time hearing one of these 88 Films commentaries, so they might all be like this - a pretty casual attitude about them). I got one stray shout out to Kerswell's 'sick burn' on The Last Slumber Party (1988) (I may add that to Slasher Sunday 2022, just because of that 'unrecommendation'). As I said at the top of this, I did have a better time with this than my original watch (it dazzled me with its 'strange style' (or whatever, lol), and I had a pretty great time with it).
Rating: 8/10 (Great)
Best Character: Susan Jeremy (Barbi Benton & Elizabeth Hoy)
Massacre Count: 10 (FINAL: 766)