Masters of Junk

Some names are synonymous with garbage. You see their names in the opening credits and you immediately cringe, regretting that you didn't read the small print on the poster, the DVD, or haven't checked the details of the bomb in question on IMDb.

These are people who have made careers out of producing, directing and writing trash, on the small and/or big screen, and in doing so have become symbols i.e. poster kids for everything that is wrong with movies and TV.

Listed in no particular order.
Log in to copy items to your own lists.
“ JJ Abrams, a result of nepotism and "proper breeding", couldn't be a "better" representative for everything that's gone wrong with modern American movies, if he tried.

So young, yet so "legendary" already. Keep it up, JJ, you're doing just anti-fine.

It takes a true anti-genius to make the already cretinous "Star Trek" franchise sink even lower. The less said about "Lost", the better. Not to mention "Star Wars", the next franchise he will sink.

Hollywood must truly be dead, when its two major franchises rely on this almost comically inept writer, so synonymous with incompetence; cretinous dialogue, hollow characters, and moronic plots are the main staples of his inability and anti-talent.

And that's just the beginning. I have total faith in him. I know he won't let us up (i.e down). Ever. ” - fedor8
Wes Craven
Director, Scream
Wes Craven has become synonymous with genre bending and innovative horror, challenging audiences with his bold vision. Wesley Earl Craven was born in Cleveland, Ohio, to Caroline (Miller) and Paul Eugene Craven. He had a midwestern suburban upbringing. His first feature film was The Last House on the Left, which he wrote...
“ He was an English college professor. That pretty much explains what is wrong with American education today. ” - fedor8
Michael Moore
Michael Francis Moore was born in Flint, Michigan on April 23, 1954, and was raised in its Davison suburb. He is the son of Helen Veronica (Wall), a secretary, and Francis Richard Moore, who worked on an auto assembly line. He has Irish, as well as English and Scottish, ancestry. Moore studied journalism at the University of Michigan-Flint...
“ One of the richest anti-Capitalists in the world, his DVDs availiable in any Walmart near you, he has taken the already laughable and awful shockumentary form and lowered it several notches into the new lowest form of "documentary" drivel-making, the "mooromentary Marxist propaganda", also known as "mooromaganda".

In a mooromagandamentary you treat your political opponents like imbeciles, carefully editing out anything logical or truthful that they might say, plus editing away anything dumb that you yourself might have said during the course of an interview, then throw in a few childish pranks, cheesy gags, and a self-serving conspiracy theory with no basis in reality, and you're set. Set for glory, and for vast quantities of cash (all of which goes into buying yachts, not into funding Marxist revolutions i.e. freeing the peasants and working class from Capitalist prosperity).

If you have been a victim of a mooremagandamentary, and have actually caught yourself quoting its delirious "facts" to your family and friends, you might want to consider getting professional help. ” - fedor8
Stephen King
Stephen Edwin King was born on September 21, 1947, at the Maine General Hospital in Portland. His parents were Nellie Ruth (Pillsbury), who worked as a caregiver at a mental institute, and Donald Edwin King, a merchant seaman. His father was born under the surname "Pollock", but used the last name "King"...
“ "I am the literary equivalent of a Big Mac and Fries." - Stephen King

Why does he choose to insult Big Macs like that? ” - fedor8
Dario Argento
Dario Argento was born in Rome, Italy on September 7 1940. He is the son of producer Salvatore Argento. He began his career as a movie critic for the Rome daily newspaper "Paese Sera". A professional screenwriter by the tender age of 20, he joined Bernardo Bertolucci to write the screenplay for Sergio Leone's epic western "Once Upon A Time In The West" in 1967...
“ All style and no substance (and not a gram of logic), that pretty much sums up Argento's asinine thrillers. ” - fedor8
Aaron Spelling
Producer, Sunset Beach
Aaron Spelling graduated from Southern Methodist University in Dallas, Texas, with a Bachelor of Arts Degree. Before that, he attended Forest Avenue High. He started as a writer and sold his first script to Jane Wyman Presents The Fireside Theatre. He wrote for various television shows, including Playhouse 90. After he wrote his first pilot he became a producer for Four Star Productions...
“ None of us mere mortals gets paid to produce dung, which is unfair considering that some people have become multi-millionaires doing just that.

What I'm saying is I know he wasn't stupid. He just wanted the rest of us to be that way. ” - fedor8
Roland Emmerich
Roland Emmerich is a German film director of blockbuster films like The Day After Tomorrow, Godzilla, Independence Day and The Patriot. Before fame, he originally wanted to be a production designer, but decided to be a director, after watching the original Star Wars: Episode IV - A New Hope. Emmerich began his career in his native Germany...
“ I am starting to believe he might not be just another cynic who exploits the audiences' need for dumbed-down drivel, but that he actually loves garbage. Roland "Fly" Emmerich.

Ed Wood reborn, but working with huge budgets. Finally Ed got his money! ” - fedor8
Spike Lee
Director, Malcolm X
Spike Lee was born Shelton Jackson Lee on March 20, 1957, in Atlanta, Georgia. At a very young age, he moved from pre-civil rights Georgia, to Brooklyn, New York. Lee came from artistic, education-grounded background; his father was a jazz musician, and his mother, a schoolteacher. He attended school in Morehouse College in Atlanta and developed his film making skills at Clark Atlanta University...
“ Pulling the Race Card can get you far in Hollywood. Any time baby didn't get the awards baby expected, or the financing that baby needed, baby chose to (wisely) cry foul.

Guess what? Baby made a whole career using such tactics.

Watch his interviews. I am not saying that people who talk that slowly have learning disabilities. I am not. ” - fedor8
“ Like father, like son. ” - fedor8
Ivan Reitman
Producer, Ghostbusters
Ivan Reitman, as a producer and director, has created many of American cinema's most successful and best loved feature film comedies and has worked with Hollywood's acting elite. Reitman has produced such hits as the ground-breaking sensation National Lampoon's Animal House, which introduced John Belushi to American filmgoers...
“ With the exception of "Ghostbusters", Reitman has had a knack of turning everything he touches into brown. He is almost like an alchemist that way. ” - fedor8
“ His movies cover the whole range, everything from cheesy dramas to really dumb soppy dramas. And always politically-correct to a tee. ” - fedor8
Emir Kusturica
Director, Underground
A Serbian film director. Born in 1954 in Sarajevo. Graduated in film directing at the prestigious Academy of Performing Arts (FAMU) in Prague in 1978. During his studies, he was awarded several times for his short movies including Guernica (1978), which took first prize at the Student's Film Festival in Karlovy Vary...
“ The shabby-looking clochard look, that's Emir's clever image shtick. Don't dress like the millionaire that you are, that might ruin your credibility as an "artist" with "street cred", friend of the downtrodden. Plus it helps distract from the obvious flaws of your movies.

Very popular in France. ” - fedor8
M. Night Shyamalan
Born in India but raised in the posh suburban Penn Valley area of Philadelphia, Pennsylvania, M. Night Shyamalan is the son of two doctors. His passion for filmmaking began when he was given a Super-8 camera at age eight, and even at that young age began to model his career on that of his idol, Steven Spielberg...
“ The first few flicks were solid, but then the true Shyamalan reared its ugly head. Now he writes his scripts as if someone had blackmailed him into ruining his own career (in return for whatever awful secret this blackmailer has on him). ” - fedor8
Michael Bay
Producer, Transformers
A graduate of Wesleyan University, Michael Bay spent his 20s working on advertisements and music videos. His first projects after film school were in the music video business. He created music videos for Tina Turner, Meat Loaf, Lionel Richie, Wilson Phillips, Donny Osmond and The Divinyls...
“ Idiocracy, here we come. Perhaps his movies are part of a bigger, more sinister plan: get them sufficiently dumbed-down, and then run for President. ” - fedor8
Edward D. Wood Jr.
Hacks are nothing new in Hollywood. Since the beginning of the Hollywood film industry, thousands of untalented people come to Los Angeles to try to make it big, (artists, writers, producers, directors, actors, etc.), but who end up exploiting others for money and also use his or her self-taught creative ability or training which leads to the production of dull...
“ Poor ol' Ed. I included him just to underline how bad the rest of these guys are. I'm a fan of Ed's badness, so in a sense he is a giant compared to all of these guys and gals. ” - fedor8
Rob Zombie
Soundtrack, The Matrix
Robert Bartleh Cummings, more famously known as Rob Zombie, was born in Haverhill, Massachusetts on January 12, 1965. He is the oldest son of Louise and Robert Cummings, and has a younger brother, Michael David (aka Spider One; b. 1968), who is the lead singer of Powerman 5000. Growing up, Zombie loved horror movies...
“ Has dedicated all his waking hours to becoming the worst director of horror flicks - past, present, and future.

He has already succeeded. Now he is dedicating himself to staying on top of that garbage heap. The prospects of success are high. ” - fedor8
Brett Ratner
Producer, The Revenant
Ratner grew up in Miami Beach, the only child of a famous Jewish socialite mother. He attended Miami Beach Senior High and was President of the Leo Club in 1986. He was also a member of the "fraternity" Royal Palm. He attended NYU film school currently lives in a $3.6 M house in Beverly Hills. Ratner is also a good friend of Def Jam mogul Russell Simmons...
John Woo
Director, Face/Off
Born in southern China, John Woo grew up in Hong Kong, where he began his film career as an assistant director in 1969, working for Shaw Brothers Studios. He directed his first feature in 1973 and has been a prolific director ever since, working in a wide variety of genres before A Better Tomorrow established...
“ Woo's arrival on the action flick scene made all the previous kaboom/pow/bang-bang/swoosh films look like science documentaries by comparison. ” - fedor8
Uwe Boll
Producer, Postal
As a child, he produced a number of short films on Super 8 and video before beginning his studies as a film director in Munich and Vienna. He also studied literature and economics in Cologne and Siegen. Uwe graduated from university in 1995 with a doctorate in literature. From 1995-2000, he was a producer and director with Taunus Film-Produktions GmbH...
Phillip Noyce
Director, Salt
Born in the Australian outback town of Griffith, New South Wales, Phillip Noyce moved to Sydney with his family at the age of 12. As a teenager, he was introduced to underground films produced on shoestring budgets as well as mainstream American movies. He was 18 when he made his first film, the 15-minute...
Robert Rodriguez
Producer, Grindhouse
Robert Anthony Rodriguez was born and raised in San Antonio, Texas, USA, to Rebecca (Villegas), a nurse, and Cecilio G. Rodríguez, a salesman. His family is of Mexican descent. Of all the people to be amazed by the images of John Carpenter's 1981 sci-fi parable, Escape from New York, none were as captivated as the 12-year-old Rodriguez...
“ With the exception of "Sin City", which is moronic but stylish at least, everything else he touches turns to visible brown matter. One of many of Hollywood's new-generation anti-intellectuals (and proud of it). Just look at that smirk.

I believe he is actually proud of making garbage, much like Michael Moore is proud of being called a liar and a fraud. ” - fedor8
Roger Corman
Producer, Death Race
Roger William Corman was born April 5, 1926, in Detroit, Michigan. Initially following in his father's footsteps, Corman studied engineering at Stanford University but while in school, he began to lose interest in the profession and developed a growing passion for film. Upon graduation, he worked a total of three days as an engineer at US Electrical Motors...
Bert I. Gordon
Bert I. Gordon, affectionately nicknamed "Mr. B.I.G." by Forrest J. Ackerman, produced, directed, and wrote more than twenty-five Sci/Fi and Horror features, such as The Magic Sword, The Amazing Colossal Man, Village of the Giants, The Cyclops, in addition to comedies such as How to Succeed with Sex. His film, The Food of the Gods, was awarded the Grand Prix du Festival International Du Paris Fantastique 1977.
Ashton Kutcher
Christopher Ashton Kutcher was born on February 7, 1978 in Cedar Rapids, Iowa, to Diane (Finnegan), who was employed at Procter & Gamble, and Larry Kutcher, a factory worker. He has a fraternal twin brother, Michael, and a sister, Tausha. He is of Czech (father) and Irish, German, and Czech (mother) descent...
“ Any TV or filmic product that even remotely has to do with him has a huge brown cloud around it, warning off discerning viewers to steer clear.

Only Ashton could possibly make Charlie Sheen look like a master comedian. ” - fedor8
Wes Anderson
Wesley Wales Anderson was born in Houston, Texas. His mother, Texas Ann (Burroughs), is an archaeologist turned real estate agent, and his father, Melver Leonard Anderson, worked in advertising and PR. He has two brothers, Eric and Mel. Anderson's parents divorced when he was a young child, an event that he described as the most crucial event of his brothers and his growing up...
“ He usually starts off with a poor premise. The next step is making that premise truly awful by writing a disastrous script.

And then, just to make absolutely sure the flick turns out truly bad, he casts Jason Schwartzman, Adrien Brody, Angelina Huston, Owen Wilson, and the like.

His mission is clear: "it must NOT be funny". ” - fedor8
Stephen Sommers
Writer, The Mummy
Stephen Sommers was born on March 20, 1962 in Indianapolis, Indiana. Raised in St. Cloud, Minnesota, he attended St. John's University and the University of Seville in Spain. Afterward, Sommers spent the next four years performing as an actor in theater groups and managing rock bands throughout Europe...
Guillermo del Toro
Guillermo del Toro was born October 9, 1964 in Guadalajara Jalisco, Mexico. Raised by his Catholic grandmother, del Toro developed an interest in filmmaking in his early teens. Later, he learned about makeup and effects from the legendary Dick Smith (The Exorcist) and worked on making his own short films...
Barry Sonnenfeld
Director, Men in Black
Barry Sonnenfeld was born and raised in New York City. He graduated from New York University of Film School in 1978. He started work as director of photography on the Oscar-nominated In Our Water. Then Joel Coen and Ethan Coen hired him for Blood Simple.. This film began his collaboration with the Coen Bros....
“ The "most unfunny big-budget comedies ever made" is the field he specializes in. He actually believes that throwing inordinate amounts of flashy CGI crap onto the big-screen somehow makes up for the shoddy script and cast. Perhaps if you're 5. ” - fedor8
Nora Ephron
Nora Ephron was educated at Wellesley College, Massachusetts. She was an acclaimed essayist (Crazy Salad 1975), novelist (Heartburn 1983), and had written screenplays for several popular films, all featuring strong female characters, such as anti-nuclear activist Karen Silkwood (Silkwood, co-written...
Kathryn Bigelow
Director, The Hurt Locker
A very talented painter, Kathryn spent two years at the San Francisco Art Institute. At 20, she won a scholarship to the Whitney Museum's Independent Study Program. She was given a studio in a former Offtrack Betting building, literally in an old bank vault, where she made art and waited to be critiqued by people like Richard Serra...
“ My head is still reeling from the over-abundant nonsense in "Blue Steel" and "Strange Days". I wanna sue her for "wrongful filmic cranial damage". ” - fedor8
“ How come there's no photo of this guy? WTH? ” - fedor8
John Waters
Actor, Hairspray
Growing up in Baltimore in the 1950s, John Waters was not like other children; he was obsessed by violence and gore, both real and on the screen. With his weird counter-culture friends as his cast, he began making silent 8mm and 16mm films in the mid-'60s; he screened these in rented Baltimore church halls to underground audiences drawn by word of mouth and street leafleting campaigns...
“ What makes him different from the rest is that he's so very proud of making trash. At least he's honest. ” - fedor8