The S**t List

The Top 25 stinkiest piles of crap I have ever had the misfortune to see.
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1.
The Human Centipede (First Sequence) (2009)
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 4.4/10 X  
A mad scientist kidnaps and mutilates a trio of tourists in order to reassemble them into a human centipede, created by stitching their mouths to each others' rectums. (92 mins.)
Director: Tom Six
“ Completely irredeemable rubbish from start to finish ” - Johnny_Hellzapoppin
 
2.
Epic Movie (2007)
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 2.3/10 X  
A comedic satire of films that are large in scope, reputation and popularity. (86 mins.)
“ I have nothing against these type of movies if they are funny. Epic Movie is not funny. ” - Johnny_Hellzapoppin
 
3.
A Nightmare on Elm Street 5: The Dream Child (1989)
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 5.1/10 X  
The pregnant Alice finds Freddy Krueger striking through the sleeping mind of her unborn child, hoping to be reborn into the real world. (89 mins.)
Director: Stephen Hopkins
“ Simply dreadful. Six is almost as bad. ” - Johnny_Hellzapoppin
 
4.
The Texas Chain Saw Massacre (1974)
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 7.5/10 X  
Two siblings visit their grandfather's grave in Texas along with three of their friends and are attacked by a family of cannibalistic psychopaths. (83 mins.)
Director: Tobe Hooper
“ Not even close to being worthy of it's reputation. It's a tediously boring exercise. A risible attempt at being shocking. It's just shockingly bad. ” - Johnny_Hellzapoppin
 
5.
Disaster Movie (2008)
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 1.9/10 X  
Over the course of one evening, an unsuspecting group of twenty-somethings find themselves bombarded by a series of natural disasters and catastrophic events. (87 mins.)
“ See epic movie comments. ” - Johnny_Hellzapoppin
 
6.
Boggy Creek II: And the Legend Continues (1984)
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 2.3/10 X  
A professor and three of his students camp out in the wilderness to find a Bigfoot-type creature. (91 mins.)
“ I almost wasn't going to include this as it's so hilarious in it's suckiness. It sucked too much not to include it though. ” - Johnny_Hellzapoppin
 
7.
Napoleon Dynamite (2004)
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 6.9/10 X  
A listless and alienated teenager decides to help his new friend win the class presidency in their small western high school, while he must deal with his bizarre family life back home. (96 mins.)
Director: Jared Hess
“ dull + boring - laughs = Napoleon Dynamite ” - Johnny_Hellzapoppin
 
8.
Taboo (2002)
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 3.6/10 X  
Six young adults struggle with their personal demons while staying at a secluded mansion during a dark and stormy night where a seemingly innocent game of 'taboo' brings out their inter-most secrets which soon leads to murder. (80 mins.)
Director: Max Makowski
“ Some of the worst ecting and writing you'll likely see in a film. Eddie Kaye Thomas is bad, but January Jones is on a whole other level of dreadfulness. ” - Johnny_Hellzapoppin
 
9.
Blood Dolls (1999)
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 3.8/10 X  
Virgil, an eccentric freak billionaire, spends his days being a "biological inventor." The "blood dolls," his newest creation, aid him in getting revenge on those who betrayed him. (84 mins.)
Director: Charles Band
“ Cheap, badly acted, badly written, badly directed. Just bad. ” - Johnny_Hellzapoppin
 
10.
Go Fish (1994)
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 5.6/10 X  
Max is a trendy, pretty, young lesbian, who is having trouble finding love. A friend sets her up with Ely... (83 mins.)
Director: Rose Troche
“ The wins my award for the worst acted movie in film history. ” - Johnny_Hellzapoppin
 
11.
Frogs (1972)
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 4.2/10 X  
A group of hapless victims celebrate a birthday on an island estate crawling with killer amphibians, birds, insects, and reptiles. (91 mins.)
Director: George McCowan
“ Had a cool premise and could have been a cool movie. It turned out to be a totally snoozefest and even the campy nature of it couldn't save it. ” - Johnny_Hellzapoppin
 
12.
Wrong Turn 3: Left for Dead (2009 Video)
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 4.6/10 X  
When their transfer bus crashes in a West Virginia forest, a group of convicts and a corrections officer meet a rafter who is on the run from cannibalistic hillbillies who have murdered her friends. (92 mins.)
Director: Declan O'Brien
“ By halfway through this I wanted to be slaughtered by a deformed hick! ” - Johnny_Hellzapoppin
 
13.
I Now Pronounce You Chuck & Larry (2007)
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 6.0/10 X  
Two straight, single Brooklyn firefighters pretend to be a gay couple in order to receive domestic partner benefits. (115 mins.)
Director: Dennis Dugan
“ I hoped for the best with this. I got the worst. Lame gay jokes aren't really a solid foundation for a movie. They are just lame gay jokes in the end. ” - Johnny_Hellzapoppin
 
14.
The Ringer (2005)
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 5.8/10 X  
A young guy's only option to erase a really bad debt is to rig the Special Olympics by posing as a contestant. (94 mins.)
“ Kinda offensive and I'm a pretty un pc guy ” - Johnny_Hellzapoppin
 
15.
Patch Adams (1998)
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 6.7/10 X  
The true story of a heroic man, Hunter Patch Adams, determined to become a medical doctor because he enjoys helping people. He ventured where no doctor had ventured before, using humour and pathos. (115 mins.)
Director: Tom Shadyac
“ The worst kind of sickly sweet, emotionally cloying, manipulative bulls##t. ” - Johnny_Hellzapoppin
 
16.
Swept Away (2002)
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 3.6/10 X  
A snooty socialite is stranded on a Mediterranean island with a communist sailor. (89 mins.)
Director: Guy Ritchie
“ I found myself getting more and more annoyed as this film drudged on. ” - Johnny_Hellzapoppin
 
17.
Hostel: Part II (2007)
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 5.4/10 X  
Three American college students studying abroad are lured to a Slovakian hostel, and discover the grim reality behind it. (94 mins.)
Director: Eli Roth
“ Hostel with its half naked guys getting butchered was just an excuse so this film with its naked women getting butchered would catch less flack ” - Johnny_Hellzapoppin
 
18.
Norbit (2007)
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 4.0/10 X  
A mild-mannered guy, who is married to a monstrous woman, meets the woman of his dreams, and schemes to find a way to be with her. (102 mins.)
Director: Brian Robbins
“ I don't know where to start...so I won't ” - Johnny_Hellzapoppin
 
19.
Police Academy: Mission to Moscow (1994)
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 3.3/10 X  
The Russian government hires the veterans of the Police Academy to help deal with the Mafia. (83 mins.)
Director: Alan Metter
“ Maybe the ultimate example of the Law of Diminishing Returns in film.
By the time they got to this the 7th outing they should have been paying us to see this dreadful offering ” - Johnny_Hellzapoppin
 
20.
The Blair Witch Project (1999)
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 6.4/10 X  
Three film students vanish after traveling into a Maryland forest to film a documentary on the local Blair Witch legend, leaving only their footage behind. (81 mins.)
“ I can't quite put my finger on exactly why I hate this film as much as I do. I had to include it though, I hate it too much to leave it off. ” - Johnny_Hellzapoppin
 
21.
The Love Guru (2008)
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 3.8/10 X  
Pitka, an American raised outside of his country by gurus, returns to the States in order to break into the self-help business. His first challenge is to settle the romantic troubles and subsequent professional skid of a star hockey player whose wife left him for a rival athlete. (87 mins.)
Director: Marco Schnabel
“ It's just bad, plain stupid and bad again. ” - Johnny_Hellzapoppin
 
22.
The Postman (1997)
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 6.0/10 X  
A nameless drifter dons a postman's uniform and bag of mail as he begins a quest to inspire hope to the survivors living in post-apocalyptic America. (177 mins.)
Director: Kevin Costner
“ Monumentally boring ” - Johnny_Hellzapoppin
 
23.
Stop! Or My Mom Will Shoot (1992)
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 4.1/10 X  
A tough police sergeant's overbearing mother comes to visit him and begins to meddle in his life and career. (87 mins.)
“ His Mom should have shot the writer, director, producer, the cast, the make up people, the cameramen and anyone else involved in making it. Then herself. ” - Johnny_Hellzapoppin
 
24.
Animal House (1978)
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 7.6/10 X  
At a 1962 college, Dean Vernon Wormer is determined to expel the entire Delta Tau Chi Fraternity, but those trouble-makers have other plans for him. (109 mins.)
Director: John Landis
“ Not worthy of its reputation. Why? Well, because it's not funny. ” - Johnny_Hellzapoppin
 
25.
The Brotherhood III: Young Demons (2003 Video)
    1 2 3 4 5 6 7 8 9 10 2.3/10 X  
A group of devil-may-care teenagers discover they've mistakenly called upon the Prince of Darkness in this flashy horror story... (82 mins.)
Director: David DeCoteau
“ Rivals Go Fish for the worst acted film I have seen. Probably also the least scary 'Horror' film I have ever seen. I does contain what I think is the worst individual performance by an actor I have seen, so it's worth a look just for the hilarity of that. ” - Johnny_Hellzapoppin