The Back-up Plan
A woman conceives twins through artificial insemination, only to meet the man of her dreams on the very same day. (104 mins.)
“ Charmless rom-com led by a charmless cast, The Back-Up Plan will only please J-Lo fans. If there's any!? ” - MKinsella187
The Last Airbender
Follows the adventures of Aang, a young successor to a long line of Avatars, who must master all four elements and stop the Fire Nation from enslaving the Water Tribes and the Earth Kingdom. (103 mins.)
“ Witness the final nail in the coffin of M Night Shyamalan's career! The source material screamed for an easy big-screen adaptation but Shyamalan still manages to sink it with a laughable script and turgid direction. Even worse, the film is so mis-cast that the actors wander through the entire film like chickens with their heads cut off! ” - MKinsella187
A Nightmare on Elm Street
The spectre of a dead child rapist haunts the children of the parents who murdered him, stalking and killing them in their dreams. (95 mins.)
“ While Jackie Earle Haley is an inspired choice to take on the role of Wes Craven's dream invader, Freddy Kruger, he's sadly let down by Samuel Bayer's inability to create a single scene of meance or terror.
A remake that should never of happened. ” - MKinsella187
Clash of the Titans
Perseus demigod, son of Zeus, battles the minions of the underworld to stop them from conquering heaven and earth. (106 mins.)
“ Truly horrific for all the wrong reasons!
Retina melting CGI. An insomnia-inducing bland lead-man. A moronic script. The only saving grace in this steaming pile of shit is wonderfully campy turns from Liam Neeson and Ralph Finnes!
But what's extraordinary about this awful remake is that it managed to claw $500m at the global box-office! It seems its audience is as lobotomised as the filmmakers. ” - MKinsella187
Strange lights descend on the city of Los Angeles, drawing people outside like moths to a flame where an extraterrestrial force threatens to swallow the entire human population off the face of the Earth. (97 mins.)
“ While not a complete disaster, Skyline enters the list for one big reason - its complete lack of fresh ideas into a bloated genre.
After an intriguing opener, we're soon tortured to cliche-ridden setpieces, stupid characters and an ending so incomprehensible that it has the audicity to suggest a sequel.
Still, for a budget of only $10m the visual effects are impressive and you had to admire the directors (Greg & Colin Strause) for going it alone to make a summer flick outside the major studios.
Now, if only intelligent filmmakers did the same. ” - MKinsella187
The U.S. military makes a scarred bounty hunter with warrants on his own head an offer he cannot refuse: in exchange for his freedom, he must stop a terrorist who is ready to unleash Hell on Earth. (81 mins.)
“ So toxic that the audience stayed away and it hardly entered the box-office with a whimper. Good to hear, as Jonah Hex is the classic lesson of how-not-to-make-a-film.
Lead Josh Brolin looks bored, John Malkovich doesn't even looks like he wants to be there and as usual Megan Fox barely even registers. Director Jimmy Hayward fumbles with the action and even fails to make a woefully thin plot seem comprehensible.
This disaster won't even fall into the so-bad-it's-funny category. ” - MKinsella187
A vacationing woman meets her ideal man, leading to a swift marriage. Back at home, however, their idyllic life is upset when they discover their neighbors could be assassins who have been contracted to kill the couple. (100 mins.)
“ Vomit-inducingly bad.
Like many films, Killers proves that Ashton Kutcher is as appealing as a bin of dead puppies. Even worse that he's side-kicked with Katherine Heigl's constant shrieking, director Robert Luketic successfully executes every scene without any ounce of wit, suspense or style. ” - MKinsella187
Wall Street: Money Never Sleeps
Now out of prison but still disgraced by his peers, Gordon Gekko works his future son-in-law, an idealistic stock broker, when he sees an opportunity to take down a Wall Street enemy and rebuild his empire. (133 mins.)
“ A bitter disappointment. In hindsight, we should've known that this sequel would be bad as it was - Oliver Stone hasn't made a good film in decades!
Here, it shows - sidelining Michael Douglas' Gordon Gekko to make room for Shia LaBeouf's Jake Moore is truly unforgivable, especially when LaBeouf is as about as convincing as Sarah Palin is as a reputable politician.
Still, Michael Douglas shines through a dull script that lacks anything remotely important to say - and it seems either does Oliver Stone. ” - MKinsella187
Saw 3D: The Final Chapter
As a deadly battle rages over Jigsaw's brutal legacy, a group of Jigsaw survivors gathers to seek the support of self-help guru and fellow survivor Bobby Dagen, a man whose own dark secrets unleash a new wave of terror. (90 mins.)
“ Saw VI was surprisingly good, the only entry in the series since the original that had a hint of plot, ability to fool the viewer and, dare-I-say-it, tension. That rotating carousel trap was a doozy!
So hopes were high for this final installment... we were wrong, very wrong. Saw 3D contains some of the most abysmal acting you'll ever see, the traps lack any imagination and after seven years you'd think the final revelation would be a shocker that would bring all the pieces of the puzzle together - not a chance!
Director Kevin Greutert and scripters Marcus Dunstan & Patrick Melton fail in almost everyway to make Saw 3D entertaining or even watchable. The 3D almost doesn't register with the viewer and any hint of that apocalyptic ending is squandered by ham-fisted acting and execution.
Mediocre, lazy and about as captivating as a trip to the dentist! ” - MKinsella187
The Twilight Saga: Eclipse
As a string of mysterious killings grips Seattle, Bella, whose high school graduation is fast approaching, is forced to choose between her love for vampire Edward and her friendship with werewolf Jacob. (124 mins.)
“ Another example of why Stephenie Meyer's pompus novels do not belong on the big screen.
The characters are still unlikeable as ever, the acting is comatose, and any hint of danger or action is muddled by the fact that all the extras in the battle scene seemed to of just walked off the set of a GAP commercial.
Worse, the finale of this mess will be a two-parter. If it didn't work for Harry Potter, Breaking Dawn has as much chance as Kirsten Stewart cracking a smile. ” - MKinsella187