NEW
Cast:
Rob Estes ... Harry Wilson
Shenae Grimes ... Annie Wilson
Tristan Wilds ... Dixon Wilson
AnnaLynne McCord ... Naomi Clark
Dustin Milligan ... Ethan Ward
Ryan Eggold ... Ryan Matthews
Jessica Stroup ... Silver
Michael Steger ... Navid Shirazi
Lori Loughlin ... Debbie Wilson
Jessica Walter ... Tabitha Wilson
Jennie Garth ... Kelly Taylor
Shannen Doherty ... Brenda Walsh
In a Nutshell: Don't call it a remake. This spinoff of Beverly Hills, 90210 is an updated look at the lives of rich high schoolers, where Brenda and Kelly are flipping their all-grown-up hairdos in dismay at the next generation of whippersnappers ruling the halls of West Beverly Hills High.
The Verdict: The pilot has aired, the reviews are in, and if we were to sum up our collective feelings with one word, it would be: "Eh."
Expanding on that thought, "90210's" two-hour opener (We're Not in Kansas Anymore, #1.1/The Jet Set #1.2) was not the worst thing that ever tainted our eyeballs. As long as you set your expectations to basement level, you were likely to have been pleasantly surprised. It was nice to see the Peach Pit brought into 2008, and Nat (Joe E. Tata) lamenting the popularity of newfangled espresso drinks. What's not to love in seeing Jessica Walter reprise her Lady Lush act again? And, who didn't marvel at how far Jennie Garth and Shannen Doherty's acting skills have not come?
Then again, that's the view of someone who's been out of high school for nearly two decades
and happens to be well-fed on more creatively rendered teen tales. You can't write off the numbers: "90210" premiered to the tune of 4.9 million viewers, making it the highest rated debut in the CW's two-year history.
What remains to be see is whether "90210" will get a passing grade from the same viewers who had fierce love affairs with "Laguna Beach: The Real Orange County" and "The Hills." With so many people getting their teen drama fixes via cable series such as "The Secret Life of the American Teenager," and better viewing options on the network's own schedule (yes, "Gossip Girl" and "Privileged," we mean you), one wonders if viewers will have enough patience to wait for West Beverly Hills High's new class to develop a more interesting personality.
Don't just take our word for it, though.
"Uncle, '90210,' I cry uncle," wrote the Chicago Tribune's Maureen Ryan, going on to sum up the premiere thusly: "
it wasn't 'Masterpiece Theatre,' and it wasn't outright terrible."
"The new version lacks that same sense of wonder and awe that Beverly Hills decadence and excesses once held over viewers," Variety's Laura Fries wrote. "...As it is, the show coasts by mainly on a wave of nostalgia and stunt casting."
"I don't know that I would call it good," wrote the Star Ledger's Alan Sepinwall, "but I could see myself tuning in again in the same way that I'll sometimes stop to watch `A-Team' reruns or 'Just One of the Guys' if I stumble across them while channel surfing."
Then there's this concise, scathing review from a fellow IMDb editor: "I watched that and the Republican Convention, and thought the Republicans were much funnier."
Oof.
Premiered: 8 p.m. Tuesday, Sept. 2, repeats 8 p.m. Thursday, Sept. 4.
Cast:
JoAnna Garcia ... Megan Smith
Lucy Kate Hale ... Rose Baker
Ashley Newbrough ... Sage Baker
Michael Cassidy ... Charlie Hogan
Brian Hallisay ... Will Davis
Kristina Apgar ... Lily Smith
Allan Louis ... Marco Giordani
Anne Archer ... Laurel Limoges
In a Nutshell: Twenty three-year-old Yale graduate Megan Smith has lofty goals of becoming a writer. But financial realities, and an unfortunate turn of events, force her to take a job as a live-in tutor for a cosmetics mogul's spoiled granddaughters. Her goal is to gain access to the inner circle of Palm Springs' rich and powerful, which would be useful for future articles and a biography or seven. But that can only happen if the high life doesn't break her first...and if her family doesn't get in her way.
The Buzz: With their high ratings and higher profile, "90210" and the amped-up second season of "Gossip Girl" have been kicking out so much light and heat that "Privileged" wasn't just under the fall TV radar, it had all but fallen off of it.
A shame, because it's smarter, sweeter and more genuinely rendered than "90210," and right in step with the polished rich kid image The CW is cultivating. Sure, the tale is lightweight; yes, it's built on a premise many tabloids would consider past its prime. But JoAnna Garcia makes the most out of what could have been a shrill, limp role as the well-meaning do-gooder dropped into the lap of luxury, only to find herself surrounded by snarling pooches. Or, we should say, two of them - Hiltonesque girls gleefully rendered by Lucy Kate Hale and Ashley Newbrough.
Newbrough makes Sage precisely the kind of celebutante one would expect on a show like this, but executive producer Rina Mimoun (formerly of Everwood) smartly imbued Hale's character with enough grounding to surprise us. Mimoun humanizes the "Privileged" princesses, giving them enough emotional levels to make us curious about what's under their designer sunglasses and "over it" pouts.
That still doesn't make them the premiere's standouts. Instead, the best scenes are stolen by the secret weapons in "Privileged's" cast: Anne Archer and Allan Louis. Archer's Laurel Limoges has a lacquered glamour about her; she's flinty enough to intimidate Megan, but the glow in her muted smile lets on that she has a soft spot or two. As Marco Giordani, Ms. Limoges's live-in chef and Megan's implied fairy godfather, Louis might not have a lot of lines, but he delivers them with verve. Giordani fills the void left by the retirement ofGilmore Girls' dear, bitchy Michel Gerard in the best way imaginable. If the show grows on you, Louis may be one of the main reasons why.
Premieres: 9 p.m. Tuesday, Sept. 9
Cast:
Anne Slowey ... Fashion News Director for Elle Magazine/Judge
Joe Zee ... Creative Director for Elle Magazine/Judge
In a Nutshell: Another reality series from "Top Model" executive producers Ken Mok and Tyra Banks, this time to see which among 11 contestants has the stuff to make it in an editorial position at Elle Magazine. They should be careful, however, as Slowey's job is to do her level best to make the trial illustrated in The Devil Wears Prada seem about as nerve-racking as reading "Oh, The Places You'll Go!"
The Buzz: The way her development slate is looking, Banks is fast becoming Mark Burnett in heels, and she has a stellar track record on The CW. Not so fast, though - Tyra Banks is a household name. Surrounding her with gorgeous girls is simply good business sense. (Fish, barrel, shotgun.) Whereas the average American who deigns to tune in to "Stylista" will probably ask three questions: Number one, who in the heck is Anne Slowey? Number two, since most folks don't know who she is, why should they care about what she does to these poor no-names? And number three, even if we don't know who she is, if she really is all that, why isn't this series on Bravo?
Of course, all it takes to make this a hit are one or two outlandish contestants. There's no review pilot to speak of, so the jury hasn't even been called for duty.
Premieres: 9 p.m. Wednesday, Oct. 22
Cast:
Hunter Ellis
In a nutshell: Look, kids -- it's Lite Beers! Calm down, we're being facetious -- Craig Piligian ("Dirty Jobs," "American Chopper," "Ultimate Fighter") executive produces this reality series that shadows people who risk their lives as part of a day's work, including war photographers, minesweepers, and Coast Guard divers.
Premieres: 7 p.m. Sunday, October 5; shifts to 6:30 p.m. Sundays on Nov. 2
Cast:
Jaime Murray ... Grace Valentine
Kristopher Polaha ... Danny Valentine
Autumn Reeser ... Phoebe Valentine
Robert Baker ... Leo
In a Nutshell: A family of Greek gods lives among us, and their raison d'etre is to bring lovers together while keeping their true identities a secret. Grace Valentine, the lady of the household, is actually the Goddess Aphrodite. Son Danny is Eros and his best friend Leo is Hercules. Rounding out the brood is Phoebe Valentine, Goddess of the Oracle at Delphi.
Premieres: 8 p.m. Sunday, October 5
Cast:
Jeff Hephner ... Morgan Buffkin
Jay Ferguson ... Cooper Buffkin
Katie Lowes ... Brandy Buffkin
Laurie Metcalf ... Mrs. Buffkin
Nick Searcy ... Mr. Buffkin
Judge Reinhold ... Barry
In a nutshell: Billed as a modern-day Dickensian tale of money and identity, this show tells the tale of the Buffkins, the family behind Prestige Payday Loans, a successful short-term loan business. The Buffkins' business affairs are in terrific shape. It's their familial affairs that need straightening out.
Premieres: 9 p.m. Sunday, October 5
Cast:
Bob Saget ... Keith Stevers
Cynthia Stevenson ... Anne Stevers
Rest of cast TBD
In a nutshell: Keith Stevers and his wife Anne live comfortably in suburbia with their two children. All is well until they get trashy and demanding new neighbors.
Premieres: 7:30 p.m. Sunday, Nov. 2
RETURNING
Cast:
Jared Padalecki ... Sam Winchester
Jensen Ackles ... Dean Winchester
In a nutshell: Two brothers with a soft spot for heavy metal continue the family legacy of hunting down demons, monsters, and things that go bump in the night, by blasting around the country in a badass muscle car. The younger, Sam, has psychic abilities and other latent powers that make him a target of hell's minions. At the end of season two Sam was killed, and Dean sold his soul to a Crossroads Demon to return him to life. The Demon gave Dean one more year to live before his soul would be claimed, leaving Sam and Dean desperately trying to figure out a way to break the contract.
Where it left us: All of that proved to be minor threat in the larger scheme of things: An old enemy opened the gates to hell, releasing hundreds of demons onto our plane, including Lilith, a god-like evil gathering forces to wage war on mankind (#3.12, Jus in Bello).
Although another demon named Ruby (#3.1, The Magnificent Seven) assisted Sam and Dean in their never-ending hunt and their quest to get Dean out of his deal with the devil, Lilith claimed Ruby' s body in the season finale (#3.16, No Rest For The Wicked) and unleashed demon dogs to drag Dean, body and soul, into Hell. But in a surprising development, Sam's latent power prevented Lilith from destroying him. In fact, it drove her to retreat.
As season four opens, Sam must figure out a way to retrieve Dean from his current predicament. Last time we checked, the guy was caught in a web of meat hooks ripping through his skin and bones. Helluva way to spend eternity.
Premieres: 9 p.m. Thursday, Sept. 18
Cast:
Blake Lively ... Serena van der Woodsen
Leighton Meester ... Blair Waldorf
Penn Badgley ... Dan Humphrey
Chace Crawford ... Nate Archibald
Taylor Momsen ... Jenny Humphrey
Ed Westwick ... Chuck Bass
Kelly Rutherford ... Lily van der Woodsen
Matthew Settle ... Rufus Humphrey
Jessica Szohr ... Vanessa Abrams
Kristen Bell (voice) ... Gossip Girl
In a nutshell: The all-seeing but never seen Gossip Girl gives us the play by play as Chuck Bass, Nate Archibald, Serena van der Woodsen and Blair Waldorf star in a rich prep school's social cabaret. On the outskirts of their social circle are two upper-middle class kids, nice guy Dan Humphrey and his sister Jenny, who slowly slip into the in-crowd's orbit. Serena forges a romance with Dan, Jenny elevates her cool kid status, Nate broods, Chuck snipes and Blair's a big old rhymes-with-witch. Decency squads across the nation are scandalized by it all! Are we going listen to them and boycott the show? Um, does Chuck Bass have a moral compass? In both cases the answer is no, no, a thousand times no.
Where it left us: OMFG, what didn't happen? An evil blast from Serena's past, Georgina Sparks (Michelle Trachtenberg), returned to town with the express purpose of ruining Serena's life (#1.15, Desperately Seeking Serena) Georgina managed to deeply worm her way in, too -- stealing the noble Dan, driving Serena to drink and drug again, and forcing her to confess her role in the coke-fueled death of an older party boy.
Apparently that was one bridge too far. The gang put aside their differences to knock Georgie out of Manhattan and into to a camp for troubled girls (#1.18, Much `I Do' About Nothing). Said events also kindled the romantic flame between two hard-hearted frenemies: Chuck and Blair hooked up again, moments after Dan officially broke it off with Serena, because too much had happened. (We'll say!)
High melodrama was not restricted to the kids, however, as Serena's mother Lily slept with Dan's father Rufus the night before she married a much richer man. Nate's dad, a former (and possibly current) drug addict had to skip the country to avoid doing jail time. Nothing is set in stone on this show, as barely a week after the wedding, Chuck ditched Blair for a cute girl moments before he was supposed to fly off to Tuscany at Blair's side. Fine by Blair, who didn't miss a beat finding someone, an intern at the Bass family's company, to take his place. Dan's flirting with Brooklyn girl Vanessa. Serena is spending time with Nate. Rufus is writing a song for Lily. We can almost picture Gossip Girl savoring the sweet taste of her lip gloss through to the last XOXO. That's understandable -- we can't wait to see where everyone lands this fall, either.
Premiered: 8 p.m. Monday, Sept. 1
Cast:
Tom Welling ... Clark Kent
Kristin Kreuk ... Lana Lang
Erica Durance ... Lois Lane
Allison Mack ... Chloe Sullivan
Sam Witwer ... Davis Bloome/Doomsday
Annette O'Toole ... Martha Kent
In a nutshell: The story of Superman begins in Smallville, where the young Clark Kent is coming to terms with his superhero identity. Lex Luthor (Michael Rosenbaum) was once his ally, but by the end of the seventh season was bent on destroying him.
Where it left us:Season seven saw several storylines tied up, as Brainiac (James Marsters) took control of Clark's cousin Kara (Laura Vandervoort) and left a vast swath of damage in his wake. He put Clark's crush Lana and friend Chloe into comas and assumed Kara's identity to reveal Clark's secret to Lex (#7.20, Arctic). Thanks to a twist in which Chloe, who had gained powers from a meteor, weakened Brainiac, Clark was able to destroy him. However, the real Kara remains trapped in the Phantom Zone. At the end of the episode Clark headed to Fortress of Solitude, where Lex was waiting for him. Clark's former pal used a device to bring the hero's arctic sanctuary down on both of them.
This spelled Rosenbaum's departure from Smallville but opened the door for another significant villain from Superman lore: Doomsday. Played by Sam Witwer, Doomsday is the alter ego of David Bloome, a kindly paramedic. It has been widely speculated that season eight could be the show's last, giving the introduction of this character a special significance. Those familiar with Doomsday's role in Superman's story know it was he who killed the Man of Steel.
Premieres: 8 p.m. Thursday, Sept. 18
Cast:
Chad Michael Murray ... Lucas Scott
James Lafferty ... Nathan Scott
Hilarie Burton ... Peyton Sawyer
Sophia Bush ... Brooke Davis
Bethany Joy Lenz ... Haley James
Lee Norris ... Mouth
Antwon Tanner ... Skills
In a nutshell: Choosing to skip college and plummet right into the characters' angst-riddled twenties four and a half years later, the season premiere (#5.1, Four Years, Six Months, Two Days) reveals that Lucas grew up to be a coach and an author suffering from writer's block; Nathan and Haley have a son and Haley is a teacher; Peyton is a low-level assistant at a record label; and Brooke has turned her fashion line into a huge success and is living in New York City. Among the major twists in this season were that Lucas was left at the altar by his book editor and fiancee Lindsey Strauss (guest star Michaela McManus) when it dawned on her, mid-ceremony, that his second book was a huge love letter to Peyton.
Where it left us: At the end of a long stream of overwrought declarations of hate and copious amounts of binge drinking, Lucas decides to pull it together. In the final scene (#5.18, What Comes After the Blues) we see him making a call to someone, and shots of Lindsey, Peyton and Brooke simultaneously answering their phones. It is unclear which one he dialed up, but the lady on the other end received an invitation to Vegas to get married.
With that we sli-i-i-i-i-de on into season six. Something to look forward to: John Doe of the seminal L.A. punk band X will be making an appearance.
Premiered: 9 p.m. Monday, Sept. 1
Cast:
Tyra Banks ... Host/Judge
Paulina Porizkova ... Judge
J. Alexander ... Judge
Nigel Barker ... Judge
Jay Manuel ... Mentor
In a nutshell: Miss Tyra lords over a gaggle of attractive girls who do their best to work it in front of the camera and on the runway, saving enough energy to have delicious cat fights during their downtime. By the end of each cycle a new Top Model is crowned, although series has yet to produce a genuine supermodel.
Where it left us: Year after year Tyra flirted with curvy girls, but it took 10 cycles to finally grant the Top Model title to one Whitney Thompson, who is allegedly full figured although according to reports, she fluctuates between a size 8 and a size 10. As if that bit of chicanery will turn the faithful away from watching Cycle 11! Besides, one voluptuous Top Model runner-up has made good - Toccara Jones became the first black plus-size model to appear in a spread in the all-black issue of Vogue Italia. Could this season's first transgender contestant, Isis, be the next big hit on the runway?
Premieres: 8 p.m. Wednesday, Sept. 3