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: [Describes what's going on throughout the entire scene
] He crashes to the ground. And now the girls come face-to-face with their tabloid tormentor. The evil reporter has been unmaksed and in that moment, Damien's whole worthless life flashes before his eyes because, the girls have made him realize that he's been living a meaningless lie. Damien
: [Lying on the ground, in pain
] Oh, d'you know what, girls... you've made me realize... I've been... living a meaningless lie. Graydon
: It's his character's one defining moment, and there isn't a dry seat in the house. Martin Barnfield
: I'm wet already. Clifford
: So, then what? Is that the end? Graydon
: No! Damien goes after the really big evil boss, McMaxford. Clifford
: Well, what about the girls? Graydon
: Well, the girls, they've gotta get to Albert Hall, right? I mean, they've been at the hospital for twelve hours. Baby
: Dennis! Posh
: Out of the ways girls? Scary Spice
: What are you doing? Posh
: Fasten your seatbelts.
[Gets in the driver's seat of the Spice Bus, puts her seatbelt on, presses down on the gas pedal, and starts driving like a lunatic
: [Getting up off the ground
] Hey! That's my bus! Posh
: Come on! What are you doing? What's the matter, are you blind? Come on, what are you doing? Get out of the way! Get out of the way! Sunday drivers! It's only Saturday! Graydon
: And now the Spice Bus is racing across London, through Trafalger's Square. Pigeons are flying up. Guys are diving into fountains. And as it zooms through them all, past Bukingham Palace, Prince William is there. He's looin' at the window through a curtain. He turns to the Queen! The Queen, man! And he says "Oi, granny, look. It's the Spice Girls. They're on telly in a minute". And the Queen looks out and says "Oh, you're right. Isn't that the Posh one drivin'?" Baby
: Look, there's the Queen! Hi, William! Ginger Spice
: Hi, Charlie. Scary Spice
: Hello, Harry. Graydon
: And then, suddenly, they're on top of the bus. Clifford
: Why? Martin Barnfield
: The rules! Graydon
: Right, right, the rules. Anyhow, there they are, standing in gale-force winds. Holding on for dear life. Emma slips, but Geri grabs her. But then Geri slips, so Mel B grabs her. But then, she slips, so Mel C grabs her. Four? Wait, that's four. Oh, there's one driving, right. Anyway, they're standing on top of a bus, whiplashing back and forth, about to be turned into Spice Jam! Martin Barnfield
: Oh, my god! Clifford
: And...? Graydon
: Two old nuns in a mini-metro pull up right in front of them. The braking tumbles the girls back into the bus.
: [after falling into the bus
] Victoria! Posh
: Sorry! Graydon
: [Describing the events as they are happening
] Now they're coming up on the tower bridge. Voice of Bridge Keeper
: Attention, please. Your attention, please. The bridge will shortly be lifted. Graydon
: The road is rising right in front of them to let a boat through! Posh
: The bridge is going up! Graydon
: They can't believe it! Scary Spice
: Oh, my god! I don't believe it! Graydon
: Are they crazy enough to try and jump the gap?
[Sporty, Baby, Ginger, and Scary put on their "game faces"
: Hold onto your knickers, girls! Graydon
: Hey, baby! These are the Spice Girls, of course they're gonna go for it! Up it goes. A five ton London bus sailing through the air at seventy miles an hour! It's incredible! Martin Barnfield
: It's expensive!
[the Spice Bus easily jumps the gap
] Martin Barnfield
: Um... not necessarily. Graydon
: But then, just when you think they're safe, they discover the bomb. Martin Barnfield
: What bomb? Baby
: [Opens up a secret door, looks at the bomb, and screams
: That bomb. Scary Spice
, Ginger Spice
: [All scream
] Martin Barnfield
: Why? Graydon
: Those are the rules. Martin Barnfield
: My god, I've had enough of the rules!
[Attempts to choke Graydon, but Clifford holds him back
] Martin Barnfield
: What are you trying to do, kill them? No more! They've suffered enough! Please! Graydon
: All right! All right! They... they run up the steps to the Albert Hall, zoom past the guards, hurdle down the corridor, and they burst through that door right there.
[Points to the door
: [Watches the door, expecting to see the Spice Girls run in. When they don't, he attemspt to choke Graydon. Martin tries to hold him back
] You lied to me! Martin Barnfield
: Hey! Hey! Hey, now! Hey! Hey! That's enough of that! Clifford
: Where are they? Graydon
: [Still choking
] I'll rewrite it.