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: That's Ed Pegram singing. Ed Pegram
: And his momma cried, cause if there's one thing that she don't need, it's another hungry mouth to feed... in the ghetto. people don't ya understand... Kate Grant
: He always did have a nice voice. It was the only nice thing about that bastard. Woody Grant
: It's all right. Kate Grant
: All right? Did you know... he was always trying to get into my bloomers? David Grant
: Jesus mom. Was the whole town trying to seduce you?
: [looking at graves
] There's Woody's little sister, Rose. She was only nineteen when she was killed in a car wreck near Wausa. What a whore! David Grant
: Mom! Kate Grant
: Nah, I liked Rose, but my God, she was a slut. David Grant
: C'mon... Kate Grant
: I'm just telling you the truth! David Grant
: Where's your family? Kate Grant
: Oh, they're over in the Catholic cemetery. Catholics wouldn't be caught dead around all these damn Lutherans.
[Approaches another tombstone
] Kate Grant
: Here's Delmer, Woody's cousin, he was a drunk. One time we were wrestling and he felt me up. Grabbed a handful of boob and Woody was right there and didn't have a clue, did ya Woody?
: Does he have Alzheimer's? David Grant
: No, he just believes what people tell him. Receptionist
: That's too bad.
: Why do you want meatloaf if it isn't even on the dinner menu? Woody Grant
: 'cause I like it. Waitress
: What can I get you? Woody Grant
: Do you have any meatloaf? Waitress
: No, that's only part of our lunch specials. Kate Grant
: He'll have the chicken. Waitress
: Fried or grilled? Woody Grant
: ...fried. Kate Grant
: He'll have it grilled. I think I'd like the roast beef, but I'm not entirely sure. What do you recommend? Waitress
: Everything's all good ma'am, but I especially like the tilapia. Kate Grant
: Oh, then I'll have the roast beef. David Grant
: ...I'll have the tilapia.
: [after telling Woody he hasn't won the money
] I can give you a free gift. Would you like a hat or a seat cushion? David Grant
: Dad. Do you want a hat or a seat cushion? Woody Grant
: I'll take a hat.
: Where's my teeth? David Grant
: You lost your teeth?
: How did she die? Kate Grant
: Saw herself in the mirror one day.
: Dad, why didn't you tell us that wasn't Ed's house? Woody Grant
: I didn't know what the hell you were doing. Ross Grant
: Have you ever seen us steal machinery before? Woody Grant
: I never know what you boys are up to. Ross Grant
: Why didn't you say it wasn't yours? Woody Grant
: I thought you wanted it. Ross Grant
: What would we want an old compressor for? Woody Grant
: That's what I couldn't figure out.
: ...and all your brothers are coming over today, remember? Woody Grant
: Some of 'em are dead. David Grant
: The dead ones won't be here.
: Hell, I drove up from Dallas one time. That's 850 miles, I done that in eight hours. David Grant
: That's, like, over 100 miles an hour. Cole
: Oh, Bart was movin'.
: We could get you to Lincoln in an hour. David Grant
: Lincoln is over 200 miles. Bart
: Okay, hour-and-a-half.
: So, you got any other cars? David Grant
: No. Just that one. Bart
: What's the engine? David Grant
: It's uh... four cylinder? Bart
: Yeah. But, what size? David Grant
: Oh, I don't really know. Cole
: What's your brother drive? David Grant
: Who, Ross? Cole
: Yeah, what does he drive? David Grant
: Ross has a Kia Rondo and Marcy has a Nissan Pathfinder. She carts the kids around a lot. Bart
: So, you all got Jap cars? David Grant
: Actually, Kia is Korean.
: So, you told the Sheriff you were walking to Nebraska? Woody Grant
: That's right. To get my million dollars.
: So, what do you think, dad? Woody Grant
: It doesn't look finished to me. David Grant
: How do you mean? Woody Grant
: [upon seeing Mount Rushmore
] Well, it looks like somebody got bored doing it. Washington's the only one with any clothes, and they're just kind of roughed in. Lincoln doesn't even have an ear.
: How did you and mom end up getting married? Woody Grant
: She wanted to. David Grant
: And you didn't? Woody Grant
: I figured, what the hell. David Grant
: Were you ever sorry you married her? Woody Grant
: All the time.
: Hey Dad, you finally got your compressor back. Woody Grant
: That's not my compressor. David Grant
: Sure it is. Woody Grant
: Mine didn't look anything like that. David Grant
: It has to be yours. It's an old compressor we found in Ed Pegram's barn. Woody Grant
: That wasn't Ed's barn.
: Oh. Okay. Dad, I found it. Here it is.
[Runs up holding partial
] David Grant
: Oh. Wait. This isn't yours. Woody Grant
: [Goes back to looking
] David Grant
: I was kidding. Here.
[Hands it over
] Woody Grant
: [Examines it
] These ain't mine. David Grant
: Of course they're yours. Woody Grant
: No. David Grant
: Whose else is it going to be? See if it fits. Woody Grant
: They're not my teeth. David Grant
: They have to be. Woody Grant
: I ought to know my own teeth. David Grant
: [Walks off
] Woody Grant
: Of course they're my teeth. Don't be a moron.
: Well, why did you have kids, then? Woody Grant
: I like to screw, and your mother's a Catholic, so you figure it out.
: I knew I didn't have a chance anyway. David Grant
: Yeah? Peg Nagy
: I wouldn't let him round the bases.