The content of this page was created by users. It has not been screened or verified by IMDb staff.
: What was that? Was it gym? I mean, what did it all mean, you know what I mean? Ms. Devine
: Oh, tomboyish little girl, I must have a chat with you! Tess
: Uh... you must? Ms. Devine
: Yes, dear, I must! I must talk woman-to-woman with you! For you and I, Tess dear, are the ONLY women here! And I have decided to be your role model! Tess
: You... you have? Ms. Devine
: Yes! And I want to instruct you in the ways of women! Come, Tess! Boink
: Can I come too? Ms. Devine
: Yes, but only if you wear this! This IS after all GIRL Talk!
[puts a wig on Boink
: Well, this is weird. I never saw myself as a blonde.
: Wow, the teacher's lounge! Boink, we're in the Teacher's Lounge! Boink
: [the wig covering his head
] They sure keep it dark in here...
: I am WOMAN! I use make-up! Lots and lots of make-up! Lipstick, rouge, eyeliner, mascara! Won't you join me in MY world? Don't you want to know the Meaning of Life? Tess
: Uh, no... Boink
: Sure you do, I gotta see how this ends!
: Do I have "Welcome" written on my back? Tess
: Look on the bright side: they took off that ridiculous makeup! I mean, if wearing makeup is the Meaning of Life, I'm in for a long rough rest of my life. I mean, that can't be the Meaning of Life! Boink
: Then what is? Tess
: I don't know. But I'm gonna find out.
: There's gotta be something about the Meaning of Life in the library, don't you think? Boink
: Um, I already asked... that book's been checked out.
: [at the library
] Yoohoo! Doctor Russell, come out! Don't be afraid, we're only students!
[a heap of books fall on Boink and Tess
: Hey, watch it, you big...
[sees it was Doctor Russell
: ...intellectual, you.
: Are you students operative? Boink
: What'd you say? I can't hear you! Dr. Russell
: Your exceedingly low altitude renders you profoundly incomprehensible, I'm afraid! Tess
: I can't understand him. I mean, I can never understand him, but now I can't even hear him either, understand? Dr. Russell
: Ah, I comprehend!
: Greetings! It's time for another beauty moment! Boink
: Do I have to wear the wig? Ms. Devine
: [drops it on him
: [recites Professor Zork's poem
] Music! The Meaning of Life, is music! You see, all of creation - you, me, the flowers and even the bugs - have a song to sing, our own melody within the big picture! The Meaning of Life is found in our search and our singing of that song! Boink
: That's... that's really beautiful, man. Tess
: Wow, I didn't know Zork could write like that. Bully
: He can't. He took it off the back of a box of Yuppy Puppy cereal. But I like it! Tess
: Geez, shot down again! I just can't believe the Meaning of Life comes from the back of a box of cereal! Boink
: [looks at the box
] Well, it says here Yuppy Puppy's the breakfast of champion philosophers...
: It's lunchtime, and I still don't know the Meaning of Life! Boink
: Oh, well. A Zen Master once said, "When you finish your dinner, wash your plate." Tess
: What does that mean? Boink
: I don't know, my mom uses paper plates...
: A video cassette about the Meaning of Life? Boink
: Don't think about it, play it! We've only got a little bit of time before classes start!
: Mr Seymour won't mind playing the tape for you. Tess
: Mr Seymour lives in that TV, I don't think he has a choice! Seymour
: You're right, I don't! But YOU do!
: [sees Boink working at Karl's
] What are you doing here? Boink
] Part-time after-school job. Saving up to buy a bike.
: One Meaning of Life, please. Boink
: You want fries with that? Tess
: Uh-huh, I missed lunch.
: But WHY do we have to have gym class? What's the point of wearing stupid outfits and jumping up and down like a jerk? Boink
: [opens a chart
] It increases blood flow! See, each one of my blood cells gets real, real happy when I jump up and down and make them go real fast! If you took them to a fun park, they'd go right for the rollercoaster! Sometimes, my blood has more fun than I do!
: What's the Meaning of Life? Dr. Russell
: I love that question! Boink
: Yeah, could you give us the short answer? Dr. Russell
: Well, I can't. But the philosopher Kierkegaard can. Kirky said "Life can only be understood backwards, but it must be lived forwards." Adios, muchachos.
[walks away, backwards
: Kirky, huh? Think they go bowling together? Tess
: First I get painted, then attacked by acrobats! And now I'm confused by a philosopher who bowls!
[Tess is talking with Boink and Grizzle
: [pulls out wigs
] Better slap this on, here comes Miss Devine! Here, Griz, I'll explain later...
[jams a wig on himself and Grizzle
] Ms. Devine
: There you are, Tess! I want to take you on a shopping field trip to the mall! Tess
: Um... Miss Devine, this beauty stuff isn't really my thing, you know, I kinda like the way I am, if that's okay with you, you know what I mean? Ms. Devine
: Well, of course I do! I'm a teacher! Ta-ta!
[as she turns to leave, she spots Griz
] Ms. Devine
: Well, thank goodness! This school is finally getting more female students! We must chat later!
: [sees three tunnels
] You know what this means, don't you? Boink
: No! Tess
: Jeez, when you gotta explain simple plot devices... we split up, each of us takes a different tunnel! Boink
: Oh, yeah! Bully
: Why didn't we think of that? Boink
: Well, Tess's mom and dad let her stay up late and watch old movies...
[Boink is sucked into a pinball game
: You know, I never really got into pinball before. This could be fun, challenging.
[a giant ball appears
: Then again...
[a fire sprinkler goes off, Boink takes out some potted plants
: This is a lot easier than getting my plants a drink at the water fountain...
: Secret doorway... Boink
: Think this is where they keep the secret mops?
: [turns off the water supply to the sprinklers
] Too bad we can't do this at picnics...
[at the janitor's office
: Do we knock? Boink
: Nah, let's bravely go where no student has gone before. Bully
: This is a tense moment...
: My dad told me about hula hoops... not much to tell.
: [to Boink, Tess and Bully
] Would you and you and, oh yes, you, be dears and find the janitor? Tell him to bring a mop! Boink
: Janitor? Ms. Devine
: Yes! You, know, those quaint lonely men with the names on their pockets? Tell him to clean up this mess, immediatement! Grizzle
: What mess?
: Oh, great. It's pitch black, how are we gonna find anything in this? Boink
: I got an idea!
[a lightbulb, symbolizing an idea, forms; he puts it on
: Bright idea!