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: I have to go shopping. Michael
: Shopping for your mum? Albert
: Shopping for a hon-ay.
: [to Albert
] What about Tanya? Tanya, who you work with? Michael
: I thought she's seeing someone else. Albert
: She hangs out with Derek. Stanley
: She thinks he's a dick. Michael
: So how come she's going out with him? Stanley
: She's not going out with him. Michael
: That's not what she said when I asked her to go to the wedding with me. Albert
: Michael, you asked Tanya? Are there any girls I like that you haven't asked out? Stanley
: So you DO like her. Albert
: So? She hangs out with dickwick Derek and his homeboys, he's obviously the "someone else"! Stanley
: Or, she hangs out with Derek because she's lonely, cause the dickwick she likes doesn't know she exists. Michael
: How do you know all this? Stanley
: I'm not just a pair of fancy shoes, you know.
: What's happened to you, Sione? Sione
: I fell in love, you dick! Man, I love Leonie more than I love anthing in the world and if any of you dickheads wreck our wedding that's it, we're done! Stanley
: Guess you don't love her that much then.
: Let's go. Drive like the wind Bolo! Bolo
: My name is Paul. Sefa
: Bolo. Albert
: Bolo. Michael
: Bolo. Stanley
: Bolo. Sefa
: Albert. Albert
: Derek. Derek
: Sole man, where you going? Albert
: Inside to talk to Tanya and stop calling me Sole, alright? Derek
: Why? Albert
: What do you mean why? Cause you're white not Samoan. Derek
: Nah, I mean why you wanna talk to Tanya? Albert
: That's none of your business. Derek
: [looks strangely at Albert
] You disrespecting me? Albert
] Hey? Derek
: Comin on my turf, getting all up on my girl. Sole man, you know how we do it in the hood.
[Sefa and the gang laugh
] Just hit the prick Albert. Albert
: Derek, this is not a Michael Jaskson video okay? So stop being a dick and get out of my way.
[the guys propose to the Pastor to bring girls to the wedding
: It's so we're different people when these girls around. Even Sefa behaves when Leilani is with him, that's why he never takes her anywhere. Sione's like a little brother to us. Michael
: Especially me, sir. Stanley
: They're related. Albert
: And this is the last wedding we'd want to ruin. Michael
: Right, Sione?
: Not just dates, not some girl foolish enough to say yes to a night out and free food. You must bring girlfriends. Albert
: Girlfriends? Stanley
: But Your Majesty, Albert hasn't had a girlfriend in 30 years! Albert
: Good one, Stanley. Minister
: Someone to whom you've made a commitment. Michael
: Commitment? Minister
: Commitment? Girlfriend? Other words you don't understand, huh?... You must find someone who sees the good in you. Bring her to my church on the day of Sione's wedding. Turn up alone, and Eugene will be more than happy to toss you into the street!
: Sole Albert
: We need to go back now
[Albert, upon seeing Derek, walks opposite direction
: [Michael, recognises Derek
] I know these dicks Sefa
: [Sefa looks at Albert
] Hey! Aren't those the dorks you work with?
[Derek calls out to Albert
[Albert walks back towards Sefa & Michael
: Let me do the talking ok? Sefa
: Why? Albert
: I'm kinda their boss, so I know how to deal with them? Albert
: Derek! Derek
: Derek? Who's Derek? Sole man, you know to call me by my street name outside business hours. How come you've been ducking my messages dog? Albert
: Der-I'm kind of busy right now... D-Rex hah!
[whispers to Derek
: And I'm not your boy... we talked about that! Derek
: haha... very funny Al-Dog
[Derek notices Michael
: Are you Michael right? Michael
: Yeah? Derek
: Very sorry to hear about your loss, uso! Faamalosi
[Gives Michael a big hug
: Any brother of a brother of Al-Dog, is a brother of the Adjustice! Michael
: The what? Derek
: THE ADJUSTICE!
[makes an A signal
: We all work in the claims adjustment with Al-Dog!